Advanced Placement Calculus Analysis

As I walked into the class for the Advanced Placement Calculus (AP Calculus) course, I immediately took my seat. As I entered the room the teacher was solving a quite difficult equation. I took out my paper and pencil and began to write. The calculus teacher asked the class to solve the equations using a graphing calculator. I was not too sure about my answers but I continued to do the work. “All done?”, my math teacher asked to the class. “What did you get for number 1?” As the class confidently blurted their answers, I remained quiet after realizing that I had gotten every answer wrong. I did not expect that almost every day of being in AP Calculus would give me that same feeling of disappointment as I experienced on the first day. I tried
Everyday my teacher tells the class, “The key to passing AP is not by being smart, but by dedication and hard work.” After going home to study practice problems for Calculus and feeling confident that I understand the content. I go to class the next day just to be stumped by math problems and after turning in my assignments I get a heartbreaking grade. Every time I receive a test or quiz the grades are unsatisfying. I compare myself to my other classmates who are doing exceptionally well and scoring high on tests and quizzes and seem to understand the material. I have gotten discouraged, contemplated giving up, and literally shed tears over my Calculus homework. The pain of knowing that I am struggling in a class is unbearable. I constantly think that this is what I wanted, to push myself to work harder and take on a more difficult class. Being in this class is teaching me the importance of dedication and hard work, and to not give up in times of difficulty. Even when I am failing I cannot give up. Being in the Advanced Placement class is teaching me the importance of diligence and to never give up when I face hardships. I have set a high goal for myself to pass the AP Calculus test with a 5, which is the highest score. I know that my current grades in the class do not reflect a 5 on the AP test and even thinking about taking the test is daunting. I learned that I know that I am not where I want to be
I could have chosen to drop the class and settle for an easier class where I know I will get in A. Although it is difficult, I will be satisfied with being in the class and working to become better because I know that after the hard work my grades will start to reflect the time and effort I am putting in to be better in AP Calculus. When I see great improvement, I will be able to be proud of myself for not giving up when things were hard and that I finally earned the A+. I learned that sometimes things may be challenging but it is an opportunity for me to work hard until I achieve my goal and be able to be proud of myself after succeeding in the end. I am learning that it is always important to try even after failing millions of times. I know others see my struggle and that my grades are not high, but I see a girl who is failing gloriously with potential and the ability to be better and is working to prove that failures are stepping stones for