Freddy L. Drayton
COMM 200
Instructor Vigil
19 August 2013
When I look at couples that have been married for a long period of time I am sure they have already discussed all there is to discuss when it comes to them. I in no way believe that you can possible run out of things to say however, finding things to simply talk about may become a problem. At this stage it is said that “we know each other so well or have been together for so long that we already know what the other is thinking without even saying a word.” Short conversations are good at this point for the sake of verbal communication between the two.
I currently am not actively engaged in a relationship because of the lack of self-disclosure, I have been told that if I fail to trust anyone then it will be hard to get to know people. I hold this to be untrue because I know several people none of which I communicate with outside of the work place. I have always been a stay to myself type of person because I feel it’s easier to just focus on me simply because I know me. In the past relationships that I’ve had they always seem to die off like after two months because of the lack of communication connectors.
I do believe that self-disclosure is important when dealing with relationships and the satisfactions of them. When you share something with someone that you have been carrying around for years it gives you a sense of release and the receiver feels that trust bond between the two of you building. It’s good to be able to trust people however; I feel that it shouldn’t be something that is easily given. When that line of trust becomes violated you sometimes get that feeling like “I shouldn’t have told this person this about me.” Once you are engaged in a committed relationship self-disclosure is good for both people once that trust has been established. I feel as if it allows for the relationship to grow and develop into a meaningful one.
When it comes to guys we are a little more timid to share with another guy our inner most secret because it violates the “GUY CODE.” Unless that other guy is a family member than it’s a little easier but, yields the same hesitation. Women are considered to be more nonverbally warmer than men with a tendency to smile and lean toward others during conversation. Women tend to use a pleasant warm voice in conversation that is not characteristic of conversations between men (Eckes, 2000). Men usually get straight to the point cut and dry, while women tend to have more fluid movement to help display compassion which makes it easier to open up to one another. I feel as though I fall into this generalization because when a guy come to me about personal problems looking for a shoulder to cry on I always hit them with the “you need to man up” line first. I know it may be ineffective but, I know it surely makes me feel better about my position in the conversation.
References http://bodylanguageuniversity.com/public/213.cfm Sole, K. (2011). Making Connections: Understanding Interpersonal Communication. San Diego, CA: Bridge point Education, Inc.
References: http://bodylanguageuniversity.com/public/213.cfm Sole, K. (2011). Making Connections: Understanding Interpersonal Communication. San Diego, CA: Bridge point Education, Inc.
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