Charlotte Lynskey Debate

As a child, I was told to treat others like I wanted to be treated. When I stole Charlotte Lynskey’s peanut butter sandwich in the first grade, my mother scolded me and asked me how I would feel if Charlotte had stolen my sandwich. I said that I would feel sad and maybe a little angry, and suddenly I understood why not all people do bad things. I am fifteen now, and the lesson my mother was trying to teach my six year old self is still evident. My actions do not have to do with my belief in karma or religion. I do not hold doors open for the elderly because I believe that I will go to hell if I do not. I invite the new kid to sit with me at lunch because I would appreciate the same kindness if I were in her shoes. It is as my mother taught
me: treat others like you want to be treated. This lesson is apparent in all aspects of life including relationships between parents and teenagers.
When kids reach adolescence, new problems arise that need to discussed. While debating an issue, kids should attempt to see from their parent’s point of view. Parents should try to remember when they were younger and if the same discussion arose between them and their parents. One of the most prominent topics being discussed between parents and teenagers is teen privacy. In the age of social media, many parents have become worried that teenagers have been granted a dangerous amount of privacy. Others believe that teenagers deserve a right to privacy. Both sides of the argument contain strong points, but the evidence seems to suggest that teenagers do have a right to privacy from their
parents. As people grow older, they begin to forget the lessons taught to them as children. When a mother reads her daughter’s diary, she is trying to protect her child from making poor choices. However, the mother should remind herself to treat others like she wants to be treated. She may not appreciate her daughter reading her text messages. Melanie Barwick, a registered psychologist and health systems scientist at the Hospital for Sick Children, believes that it is a violation of privacy and many parents forget this while trying to protect their children. In her article “Teens Have a Right to Privacy from Parents” Barwick states that “if it’s not okay for your teen to listen in on your phone conversations, read your e-mail, or rifle through your texts or handbag, then it’s not okay to behave this way with them.” Although they have the best intentions at heart, it is common for anxious parents to overstep privacy boundaries. Barwick believes that by doing so, parents may be weakening their relationship with their children. To maintain a healthy relationship, parents and teenagers must equally trust each other. According to Barwick, respecting privacy boundaries “promotes a trusting and loving relationship.” Barwick claims that “recognizing personal space will foster a relationship based on trust.” She believes that teenagers may be able to trust their parents more when their privacy is not being violated. Trust will allow for greater communication.
When teenagers are able to trust their parents not to go through their items or read their text messages, they may be able to trust their parents with information from their private lives. However, Barwick believes that “crossing the privacy boundary may widen the communication chasm between you and your teen.” By violating their privacy, parents may cause teenagers to feel betrayed and isolated. Barwick believes that this may greatly jeopardize communication between parent and teen. With the advent of social media, many parents have begun to believe that their kids have too much privacy. However, Barwick argues that teenagers’ need for privacy has not changed. The advent of social media did not affect teenagers’ natural instinct to pull away from their parents and spend time alone. Teenagers are still the same, but technology has allowed their personal space to grow. Barwick recommends parents to “rethink the privacy boundaries given the new landscape” but remember that social media may not be affecting how their kids act.
Lindsay Ferrier, author of the parenting blog Suburban Turmoil, views the relationship between a parent and a teenager as similar to that of an employer and employee. In the workplace, employees understand that their employers may be monitoring their conversations, emails, and computer usage. Many employers do not do this on a daily basis, but the employees recognize that is a possibility and are more aware of their actions. In her article “Teens Do Not Have a Right to Privacy from Parents,” Ferrier states that she plans to have her kids conduct themselves in the same way. She believes her kids should know that at any time she “may be watching or listening.”
In her article, Ferrier quotes a mom from a recent online message-board discussion on teen privacy.
The mom wrote, “I feel parents this day and age need all the inside information possible to help teens stay safe and healthy. Many times I hear from parents in shock when their child’s mental health has deteriorated, they are cutting themselves or taking drugs or are depressed. We never saw it coming, they say. Would a peek into a diary have foretold and they could have done something about it?” Barwick urges parents to keep tabs without crossing the privacy boundary. He suggests family means which, like other forms of parental involvement, are linked to positive teen behavior. According to the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse, teenagers who regularly have meals with their family are less likely to get into fights, have suicidal thoughts, smoke, drink, use drugs, and are more likely to have later initiation of sexual activity, and better academic performance than teens who do not. Barwick believes that there are other ways of ensuring the safety of teenagers that do not involve violating their privacy and may allow for greater communication and a healthy relationship between a respectful parent and a mature, trustworthy
teen.