Child Psychology
Bad Parenting Habits
Parenting doesn't come with a handbook. It's all on-the-job training. But the same is true for kids trying to grow into adults. No guidelines, just lots of unwritten rules that restrict who our children think they want to be. Ultimately, both parties want the same outcome: the kids' independence. Parents just tend to want to attach a couple of modifiers to that: responsible, successful independence.
There are subplots in every family drama, hurdles that must be overcome before our goals are met. Some of those hurdles we set up for ourselves. Often our good intentions, hopes and desires sabotage our parenting program. Sometimes we'd rather be the good parent than engage in good parenting. And sometimes our kids are right. We just don't understand what they're going through.
Parenting isn't just a job; it's a lifelong commitment. And when you're caught up in the day-in, day-out adventures of raising kids for around two decades, it's easy to fall into habitual behavior. Unfortunately, some of those habits are counter-productive.
BRIBERY BLUES
Attempting to bribe your child into good behavior often has negative results. Food rewards can lead to unhealthy eating habits. Over time, bribery can get out of hand, with your child demanding ever-increasing rewards for doing what he or she is supposed to do anyway. It's better to catch your child being good and reward them for that than to try to buy his or her way out of bad behavior.
Not Following Through
Guiding children's behavior through rules and limits is a big part of parenting. At some point in their development, children will experiment with you to see just how serious you are about those boundaries.
That's why parents need to establish and clearly communicate the consequences of breaking those rules.
Here's the problem: Parents don't really want to punish their kids. It's so easy to think that a warning (or two or three) will avoid a fight, save everyone's feelings
Parenting doesn't come with a handbook. It's all on-the-job training. But the same is true for kids trying to grow into adults. No guidelines, just lots of unwritten rules that restrict who our children think they want to be. Ultimately, both parties want the same outcome: the kids' independence. Parents just tend to want to attach a couple of modifiers to that: responsible, successful independence.
There are subplots in every family drama, hurdles that must be overcome before our goals are met. Some of those hurdles we set up for ourselves. Often our good intentions, hopes and desires sabotage our parenting program. Sometimes we'd rather be the good parent than engage in good parenting. And sometimes our kids are right. We just don't understand what they're going through.
Parenting isn't just a job; it's a lifelong commitment. And when you're caught up in the day-in, day-out adventures of raising kids for around two decades, it's easy to fall into habitual behavior. Unfortunately, some of those habits are counter-productive.
BRIBERY BLUES
Attempting to bribe your child into good behavior often has negative results. Food rewards can lead to unhealthy eating habits. Over time, bribery can get out of hand, with your child demanding ever-increasing rewards for doing what he or she is supposed to do anyway. It's better to catch your child being good and reward them for that than to try to buy his or her way out of bad behavior.
Not Following Through
Guiding children's behavior through rules and limits is a big part of parenting. At some point in their development, children will experiment with you to see just how serious you are about those boundaries.
That's why parents need to establish and clearly communicate the consequences of breaking those rules.
Here's the problem: Parents don't really want to punish their kids. It's so easy to think that a warning (or two or three) will avoid a fight, save everyone's feelings