Chivalry Research Paper

Death of Chivalry The knight, clad in silver armor and wielding a mighty sword, is a cornerstone of virtue and righteousness. Whether it be the fictitious dragon-slaying champion or the very real warrior of medieval times, all knights lived by a moral code known as chivalry. Combining the primary aspects of justice, courage, and honor, the chivalrous knight must always be ready to defend those weaker than himself. Today, chivalry has almost become synonymous with men being courteous and attentive, especially towards women. Unfortunately, chivalry of the modern day has undergone horrible perversions. Several groups have taken this upstanding system and corrupted it to suit their individual needs, often utilizing the code as a weapon against
others. From an unknown author, “Ladies, be careful of men who pretend to be gentlemen by standing back saying to you, ‘Ladies first’ What [they’re] really saying is ‘Go ahead, I’ll stand back and watch your ass from back here.” The knight is a pinnacle of goodness, and his greatest enemy is the black knight: a faux paladin that presents himself as a hero, but has nefarious intentions. Our society is filled with “gentlemen” acting as black knights; they fool women into trusting them. It has become almost standard for men to act this way, to the point that many people expect any chivalrous act to be for ulterior motives. Unfortunately, these men are not actually galavanting around in ebony armor, which makes them much harder to identify. However, there are many signs that indicate the sincerity of certain actions. Telling a woman that she looks nice is fine. Even when it may not be necessarily wanted by the woman, if represented in a friendly way the gesture is not wrong. A polite compliment is not to be confused with harassment. Catcalls and leering is not a compliment. From “The 25 Real Distinctions Between A Womanizer And A Gentleman” on Elite Daily, “The prime characteristic of a player is his need to put women down to look better. Gentlemen don’t need to wound their women to get their loyalty.” A nice man will hold the door for a woman, but he will also hold the door for anybody. If a man is only courteous towards women, but nasty towards everyone else, he is more than likely just a jerk. A nice man will also not force the chivalry to occur. In this scenario, a couple is walking and the woman reaches the door first. If this woman were a kind human being, she would act with chivalry and hold the door open for her spouse. Some men, however, cannot allow this travesty to occur and must then, of course, push his lover aside to make sure he can respect her correctly. Besides, he needs to be the man of the relationship, It may appear that this man is acting with chivalry, but he (perhaps unknowingly) is doing the exact opposite. Many men have a misconception of what they believe to be gender roles, and therefore attempt to be chivalrous to fulfill that role. By doing it for the sole purpose of “being the man,” the sincerity is completely erased. True chivalry is not for any goal other than to aid others. At the very least, the modern black knight knows himself.
Most men with those intentions understand what they are doing, without caring. Nothing is worse than a man in denial of his own faults, and nothing is a better example of this than “the friendzone.” First being heard in an episode of the popular television show Friends, the friendzone is defined thusly, “A nonsexual relationship in which a person wants to go into a sexual or romantic relationship, whereas the other involved does not.” Harmless enough, however, the term brings about a connotation of entitlement and an entire community has been born around this concept. Many guys believe that being nice to a woman means that she should love/be attracted to you Men from all around the world contact each other to discuss the trials and tribulations of being in, and attempting to escape the friendzone. Getting outofthefriendzone.net provides answers for any poor soul lost in the spurning of a desired partner. The only problem is that the friendzone doesn’t exist. Sure, wanting another person who doesn’t return those feelings is not fun, but the individuals use it as an excuse. They think, I am a chivalrous man, why doesn’t she like me? I guess I am just in the friendzone. Any fault of their own is completely ignored. Instead of actually looking in the mirror and considering why a woman may not like them, the problem is put onto the friend. Perhaps the man in question eats pizza rolls every meal, hasn’t showered since
third grade and doesn’t understand why she isn’t enamored by his level 100 warlock in World of Warcraft. He could think, Hmm, is it possible that women enjoy clean cut, ambitious men that can provide for them? But no, the thought process is probably more along the lines of, Welp, I guess I am just too nice. Women only like the jerks who treat them poorly. Not only is this horribly sad, but incredibly egotistical and sexist. These acts portray the belief that a woman must give herself to any suitor who compliments her. Women are not the problem. Lack of effort is the problem, and using shallow attempts at chivalry as an excuse demeans everything it means to be chivalrous. Women may not be the issue when applied to the friendzone, but some women heavily contribute to the decline of chivalry. Feminism has brought liberty and rights to all women in
America, but a minority of the movement goes to the extreme.
Labeled as man-haters and feminazis, this group believes that the genders are not equal and that women are actually superior. Men who harass women and catcall are labeled pigs (as they should be), but men who hold doors and pull out chairs are also flamed for enforcing the patriarchal society. The feminist movement brought great change upon the entire nation, but this misandrist subset is starting to destroy everything the group stands for. Holding the door for a woman is not implying that she is too frail to open it herself, the act shows kindness and respect. Sabrina L. Schaeffer, executive director of the Independent Women’s Forum, says “But gender roles helped men and women and in times past allowed the sexes to better navigate the sometimes-rough waters of romance, courtship, marriage, and sex. Feminists view the chivalry and social mores of previous generations as anachronistic. But the reality is these traditional customs of giving up a seat for a woman on a train, or accompanying a woman in public, weren’t all rooted in sexism. They were social structures to help make men more respectful of women and to curb this kind of inappropriate behavior.” Gender equality is a respectable goal for feminists, but men and women can be equal while still being different. Most feminists, including the director of an influential feminist organization, agree that chivalrous acts benefit both genders. Chivalry wholeheartedly
supports equality between sexes. Knights did not help women because they viewed them as lesser. Knights helped everyone because it is the right thing to do. “Society has never been perfect, and I’m not advocating for a return to a time when women’s choices were more limited, but in years past men and women both had a better framework to determine what was acceptable behavior and what was not.” (Schaeffer). The distortion of chivalry has been ongoing for years now and if left untouched, will only continue to get worse. Chivalrous acts are not preserved for romantic man-woman interactions. Anyone can act chivalrous at anytime.. Give up a seat on the train to an elderly man. Hold the door for somebody carrying a package. If respect dies, if positive gender roles die, if chivalry dies, society dies too.