When I look at the topic male-female communication, the first thing that comes up to my mind is that man and woman must have a very good communication, because there are only men and women in the world. But as I think a little bit deeper, there is something different between a man and a woman, different types of talking styles, different ways of thinking, and different point of views. For instance, if a guy thinks that he spends too much time on his girlfriend, but somehow she might think that he doesn't have enough time to be with her, so that if they are not willing to communicate to solve this problem, they will break up very easily. So when two different kinds of people get together, problem and conflicts will appear between them. There are two articles "His Talk, Her Talk" by Joyce Maynard and "Man To Man, Woman To Woman" by Mark A. Sherman and Adelaide Haas. Both articles talk about the same topic male-female communication.…
Dave Barry’s Guys vs. Men is a humorous essay that describes the major characteristics of “guyhood” even though he admits he can’t define exactly what it means to be a ‘guy’. In the essay, Barry uses plenty of gender stereotypes of men, guys, and women. His take on the existence of gender is comical. For instance, he says that “If God did not want us to make gender-based generalizations, She would not have given us genders”.…
In today's Society conversations between males and females has become difficult. There are a lot of miscommunications between males and females. In Deborah Tannen’s article “ Sex, Lies and Conversations” Tannen talks about how men and women talk differently to each other as well as the misunderstandings between each. She believed that no one person was at fault, whereas the differences caused by sexual standards. I feel that communication changes between males and females when in a different age group. These groups range from children, to teens, and adults.…
Secondly, Tannen does observations that allow her to show how men and women tend to have discussions. While men tend to be more joking, women talk more about their problems. “When…
In Tannen’s case she brings up a time when she attends a women’s group meeting where they had invited men. In this meeting she mentions a talkative man who had been participating a lot in the discussion while his wife remained silent. Tannen says “That women frequently complain that their husbands don’t talk to them” (311). That man agrees with her assertion. Tannen’s later supports her arguments by listing studies further on the matter of gender communication. Power follows this by listing her conversation with a colleague who tells her “ You Westerners make love in public and pray in private. We Muslims do exactly the reverse” (301). She lists example from culture and her study on this matter.…
You Just Don’t Understand Women and Men in Conversation by Deborah Tannen is basically an explanation on how women and men converse. Tannens main goal is to give advice to the different genders in order for them to avoid as much conflict as possible. Tannen’s main ideas are to explain how differently women and men react to each other’s way of being. It’s like they’re in their own little world while living in the same big world. Men tend to try to dominate situations and tend to always want to be at the top. Women do not tend to want to get into conflict but tend to show understanding. These big differences bring them into conflict. A Tannen explains, “What he wanted conflicted with what she wanted”. (40) Women and men are constantly clashing in opinions.…
Laura Schlessinger sees women as the issue in relationships, author Deborah Tannen believes that both genders cause problems in relationships. Tannen shows all the research she conducted that allows the reader to infer that males and females are very different. Obviously males and females are raised differently, but it seems no one expected for that to affect their relationships. Tannen provides evidence that shows the different mindset of males and females when she explains, “For women, as for girls, intimacy is the fabric of relationships, and talk is the thread from which it is woven. Bonds between boys can be as intense as girls’, but they are based less on talking, more on doing things together” (1). Simply, boys and girls are wired differently. They have a different mindset about what is most important in a relationship. Because they each have a different way of thinking, it can often cause problems. Those problems are getting more difficult to solve. Both the male and female want to be right and not at fault for why they fought. That concept is easy to understand after reading, “Sex, Lies and Conversation,” because Tannen explains it thoroughly. In relationships, the male and female tend to find a flaw in their partner and use it against them in the argument. An example of this is given when Tannen stated, “Many of the psychological explanations that have become second nature may not be helpful, because they tend to blame either women (for not being assertive enough) or men (for not being in touch with their feelings)” (3). These flaws are used against the other person in an argument. Evidently, it is not only the female’s fault as to why the relationship is not working; it can also be the male’s…
In Debrah Tannen’s essay on “Why Is It So Hard For Men and Women to Talk to Each Other,” she tries to inform us of this lack of communication between men and women and the problems that it can cause. The author starts off by giving the reader an example of a situation involving a man and his wife where the husband would comment on how much his wife is the talker in the family and how she is always talking when she is at home. This demonstrates that men generally talk more in public situations, while women tend to talk more at home. She follows up by talking about how most of the women that divorced gave lack of…
In “Sex, Lies and conversation” Tannen expresses, the distinct differences of both men and women in the way they converse with each other. Such as, men tend to listen rather than converse and women tend to expect a certain response to everything they say. While both genders seem to have their differences Tanner, examines the underlying method of how both gender converse.…
In this chapter, Floyd (2011) discusses the many ways that gender affects interpersonal relationships. He describes is as a “defining feature of our identity, shaping the way we think, look, and communicate” (p. 51). It is explained that each gender culture puts emphasis on different parts of the relationship. Women come to value communication and closeness, while men value taking part in activities together (Floyd, 2011, p. 57). This makes sense when I think about how I communicate with men versus with women.…
The fact that men and women are different in their communication styles is understandable. They differ in the way they think and it shows in the way they talk and communicate with each other. Though their communication is unlike each other, we do speak the same language –to each gender it just might have a different meaning, connotations or personal messages.…
In the article, the well-known linguist Deborah Tannen discusses about the multiple issues of gender specific communication. Deborah Tannen shows that patterns of communication are different between the two genders and because of this it can eventually cause a communication failure, which could cause a divorce for many couples. Therefore she suggests that if they could understand the different patterns of communication with one another than it could result in an effective relationship.…
The article “Sex, Lies, and Conversation” by Deborah Tannen discusses the different ways men and women communicate. The selection “Sex, Lies, and Conversation” was taken from Tannen’s book “You Just Don’t Understand: Women and Men in Conversation”. In the selection Tannen, a linguist’s, describes the discrepancies of communication between men and women. Most women cite conversation as a problem in relationships between a man and a woman. The discrepancies start in the stage of childhood. This is the time frame where the habits are first formed, as the child’s development is mainly influenced from their peers. I agree with Tannen’s points on why the problems arise, and can relate all the points to my own personal conversations. Tannen describes one idea as how women use intimacy as the background for friendships, and this is how all of my friendships are based. Two other points, the misalignment in the mechanics of the conversation between a man and women and how women make more listener-noises often all are true on how my conversations are conducted. Both points tend to make me believe that men aren’t listening when I am conversing with them, and this is the response from the discrepancies between a man and woman that Tannen describes.…
Communication is a very important factor in human life. Without communication our lives would be dull because we wouldn't learn from each other or keep up with what is occurring around us every day. Men and women communicate in the same form, but each of them oppose in certain aspects of communication that may cause interference between both sexes. Why do we differ so much to often cause uncomfortable social situations between each other? This question is often answered by understanding simple social observations of both sexes as adults and as children.…
There is a large problem when it comes to communication between men and women, whether it is between children, teenagers, or adults; because of a cross gender society. Once both sides understand this "cross-culture communication" problem, so that no gender is blamed, improvement will naturally occur. Deborah Tannen, is an award winning writer and a best selling author for her eccentric essays based on differences of male and female conversations. In the essay, "Sex, Lies and Conversation" she writes on the many distinctions of the style of conversations on both men and women.…