Cultural Influences on Parent-Child Relationships

Cultural Influences on Parent-Child Relationships The United States is the most diverse nation in the world with immigrants from countries such as Mexico, China, Vietnam, Philippines, etc. Families from these different regions struggle with trying to balance their new American culture without losing touch with their homeland customs. A major obstacle is maintaining a healthy relationship between parents and children-- especially adolescents. It is hard enough for parents and adolescents to be on the same page, but even more so when there is a difference in values and practices. Parents strive to keep their native principles by instilling them into their children, which creates conflict because children are more exposed to the American society. While both parties attempt to juggle two different cultures, there are many impediments that restrain them from having healthy parent-child relationships.
One hindrance to relationships between parents and adolescents is the use of different languages. Although some children are able to speak or understand their native language, not all choose to communicate with their parents that way. In a study that examined parent-adolescent language use and relationships among immigrant families, they found that English speaking families experience more conflict compared to native speaking families from Asian Pacific or Latin American backgrounds whose language is structured around respect toward parents (Tseng & Fuligni, 2000). For instance, Filipino’s Tagalog language has certain terms for elders such as “Kuya” meaning older brother, but is also used to address any older male peer. The association of “Kuya” to a brother as well as a stranger, shows a level of respect Filipinos have for each other whether they are actually blood-related or not. Adolescents who did not share a common language with their parents reported feeling “emotionally distant from them and less likely to engage in discussions with them,” while those who spoke their native language with their parents had the highest level of closeness and were the most likely to discuss problems with them (Tseng & Fuligni, 2000). For example, in a study that examined whether acculturation was associated with parent-adolescent communication about sex in Filipino-American families, “greater adolescent use of English was associated with less frequent parent-adolescent communication about sex” (Chung et al., 2007). With English as a child’s primary language, there is already a barrier separating them from their parents. Another dilemma immigrant families have is their culture’s firm parental authority. Mexican, Chinese, and Filipino immigrant groups have all been characterized as possessing traditions of respecting parental authority and reducing independence in order to maintain family harmony (Fuligni, 1998). While the American society encourages youth to speak their minds, immigrant parents feel disrespected when their adolescents disagree with them or assert their opinion (Sung, 2007). In a study of East Asian families, results found that there was an unspoken “hierarchy that puts the adolescent in lower ranks”. One parent participant stated, “Because they are young, regardless of them liking it or not, they need the parent’s supervision… I am the top boss in the family. I expect my daughter to follow my orders” (Sung, 2007). In the same study, adolescent participants felt that their parents were too controlling, and kept them from being independent. One participant conveyed how she became so accustomed to her parent’s “grip” on her, that once she’d have to leave for college, she would not know what to do with herself. In addition, adolescent participants expressed that they were more comfortable communicating with their friends rather than their parents (Sung, 2007). A common problem adolescents face is their parent’s high expectations. In the United States for example, once someone reaches 18-years-old, they are considered an adult and can legally live on their own without any responsibility to their parents. On the contrary, a community-based participatory research study found adolescents agreed most with the statement, “Children should expect to take care of their parents when their parents become unable to take care of themselves” (Chung et al, 2007). Furthermore, the Confucian principles of Chinese families indicate, “children should obey their parents their entire lives” (Fuligni, 1998). In Sung’s study (2007), the expectation for most East Asian families was for their adolescents to succeed in their academic careers and complete a college education. One participant said, “It was expected that you go to school, and not get in trouble, graduate, go to college, get a good job, and meet a nice spouse” (Sung, 2007). Though it may seem like a common parent expectation, adolescents testified that the topic of conversation centered primarily on school and grades, and that it became overwhelming and “in your face” all the time. In a study between Chinese and Filipino American students, academic achievement was one of the main determinants of success for both groups (Eng et al., 2008). One Filipina in the study said “she would kill herself in order to scare her father because he never understood her feelings.” Like other Asian American adolescents, her resentment suggests an extreme amount of pressure from her parents to succeed (Eng et al., 2008). Cultural influences on families have a vast impact on parent-child relationships.
There are multiple barriers that keep them from maintaining a positive relationship with each other such as different language use, hierarchical relationship, and overwhelming expectations. Though similar issues are present in many families, the stress immigrant families share is much more complex. Parents attempt to preserve their native principles by implementing them to their children. However, children struggle by trying to balance their parent’s values with their primary American culture.

References

Chung, J., et al. (2007). Acculturation and Parent-Adolescent Communication about Sex in Filipino-American Families: A Community-Based Participatory Research Study: Journal of Adolescent Health, 40(6), 543-550. Doi: 10.1016/j.jadohealth.2007.01.004

Eng, S., et al. (2008). School Achievement Differences Among Chinese and Filipino American students: Acculturation and the Family: Educational Psychology, 28(5), 535-550. Doi: 10.1080/01443410701861308

Fuligni, A. J. (1998). Authority, autonomy, and parent–adolescent conflict and cohesion: A study of adolescents from Mexican, Chinese, Filipino, and European backgrounds: Developmental Psychology, 34(4), 782-792. Doi: 10.1037/0012-1649.34.4.782

Sung, H. Y. (2007). The Influence of Culture on Parenting Practices of East Asian Families and the Impact on Emotional Intelligence of Older Adolescents: Dissertation Abstracts International, 68(3-A), 877. Retrieved from Dissertations & Theses: The Humanities and Social Sciences Collection

Tseng, V. & Fuligni, A. J. (2000). Parent-Adolescent Language Use and Relationships among Immigrant Families with East Asian, Filipino, and Latin American Backgrounds: Journal of Marriage and Family, 62(2), 465-476. Retrieved from http://www.jstor.org/stable/1566752

References: Chung, J., et al. (2007). Acculturation and Parent-Adolescent Communication about Sex in Filipino-American Families: A Community-Based Participatory Research Study: Journal of Adolescent Health, 40(6), 543-550. Doi: 10.1016/j.jadohealth.2007.01.004 Eng, S., et al. (2008). School Achievement Differences Among Chinese and Filipino American students: Acculturation and the Family: Educational Psychology, 28(5), 535-550. Doi: 10.1080/01443410701861308 Fuligni, A. J. (1998). Authority, autonomy, and parent–adolescent conflict and cohesion: A study of adolescents from Mexican, Chinese, Filipino, and European backgrounds: Developmental Psychology, 34(4), 782-792. Doi: 10.1037/0012-1649.34.4.782 Sung, H. Y. (2007). The Influence of Culture on Parenting Practices of East Asian Families and the Impact on Emotional Intelligence of Older Adolescents: Dissertation Abstracts International, 68(3-A), 877. Retrieved from Dissertations & Theses: The Humanities and Social Sciences Collection Tseng, V. & Fuligni, A. J. (2000). Parent-Adolescent Language Use and Relationships among Immigrant Families with East Asian, Filipino, and Latin American Backgrounds: Journal of Marriage and Family, 62(2), 465-476. Retrieved from http://www.jstor.org/stable/1566752