effective elements of counseling
A counsellor can show his or her respect to clients in the following ways:
Accept the client by showing unconditional positive regard. This means that you as counsellor accept the client as he or she is, irrespective of the client's values or behaviour and of whether you as counsellor approve of those values and behaviour or not. A judgemental counsellor who condemns clients or who makes clients feel that their sexual behaviour is offensive to the counsellor, will not be able to facilitate healing, and will only do harm.
Respect the client's rights. Individuals have a right to be who they are, a right to their own feelings, beliefs, opinions and choices.
Respect the uniqueness of each client.
Refrain from judgement. Counsellors are there to help their clients, not to judge or to blame them. Since HIVinfected individuals often already feel that they are “guilty” or “bad” before counselling even starts, only nonjudgmental attitudes on the part of the counsellor will facilitate understanding and growth.
Remain serene and imperturbable and never react with embarrassment, shock or disapproval when people discuss painful situations or their sexual practices with you.
2. Genuineness and congruence
Genuineness refers to being honest and transparent in the counselling relationship. A genuine or congruent counsellor demonstrates the following values or behaviour:
Be yourself. Be real and sincere.
Be honest with yourself and your clients.
Don't be patronising or condescending.
Keep the client's agenda in focus. Don't pursue your own agenda or inflict yourself on others.
Don't be defensive. Know your own strengths and weaknesses.
Strive towards achieving openness and selfacceptance because these qualities will enable you to accept people whose behaviour conflicts with your own personal values. Remember that it is impossible to hide negative feelings from clients. No matter how hard you try to conceal them, clients will sense your incongruence.
When clients
Accept the client by showing unconditional positive regard. This means that you as counsellor accept the client as he or she is, irrespective of the client's values or behaviour and of whether you as counsellor approve of those values and behaviour or not. A judgemental counsellor who condemns clients or who makes clients feel that their sexual behaviour is offensive to the counsellor, will not be able to facilitate healing, and will only do harm.
Respect the client's rights. Individuals have a right to be who they are, a right to their own feelings, beliefs, opinions and choices.
Respect the uniqueness of each client.
Refrain from judgement. Counsellors are there to help their clients, not to judge or to blame them. Since HIVinfected individuals often already feel that they are “guilty” or “bad” before counselling even starts, only nonjudgmental attitudes on the part of the counsellor will facilitate understanding and growth.
Remain serene and imperturbable and never react with embarrassment, shock or disapproval when people discuss painful situations or their sexual practices with you.
2. Genuineness and congruence
Genuineness refers to being honest and transparent in the counselling relationship. A genuine or congruent counsellor demonstrates the following values or behaviour:
Be yourself. Be real and sincere.
Be honest with yourself and your clients.
Don't be patronising or condescending.
Keep the client's agenda in focus. Don't pursue your own agenda or inflict yourself on others.
Don't be defensive. Know your own strengths and weaknesses.
Strive towards achieving openness and selfacceptance because these qualities will enable you to accept people whose behaviour conflicts with your own personal values. Remember that it is impossible to hide negative feelings from clients. No matter how hard you try to conceal them, clients will sense your incongruence.
When clients