Evaluate The Correspondence Between Eye Gaze And Courtship
Eye Gaze and Courtship
Jeffry Curry
Ottawa University
Eye Gaze and Courtship Have you ever given someone “the look” or felt attracted to another person just by the way they looked at you? Much of what is communicated by humans starts with the eyes. The author will examine a number of studies completed about eye gaze and human courtship in order to evaluate the correspondence between the two concepts.
Eye Gaze
There are so many ways in which we as human beings communicate. Communication begins before a word is even uttered or written on a page. One of the most basic forms of communication begins with a simple look, or as it is called by those who study it, a gaze. The gaze actually falls …show more content…
under the study of kinesics. Kinesics is the study of body movements and gestures including eye gaze and facial expressions (Trenholm and Jensen. 2012). Adam Kendon proposed that the gaze served three primary functions; expressive, regulative, and monitoring (pg 57 ¶3).
Communicating Emotions/Desires
The gaze helps people communicate their emotions to others. Although people use facial expressions, the eyes serve well to communicate fear and surprise. The gaze also identifies desirability in an object or another person or it can reveal a person’s intentions (Woodward. 2003). Anouk van der Weiden, Harm Veling, and Henk Aarts from Utrecht University conducted a study of how gaze shifts of other people can enhance and object’s desirability. In their study they found that a three-step process of looking at a person then shifting their gaze to an object and then back to the person caused the person to shift their gaze as well and communicated a desire of the object (Weiden, Veling, and Aarts. 2010). The study did indicate that facial expressions can modify the results, but absent other expressions this three-step gaze shift seemed to express desirability.
Monitoring Interaction
Gaze also regulates and monitors interactions with others (Trenholm and Jensen. 2012). The gaze lets others know that we are ready to communicate, or in contrast, can let someone know that we do not wish to engage in conversation. If a person is in a hurry and does not have time to talk, then they may avert their gaze and pretend not to see someone. If a person is not in a hurry then they may prolong their gaze in order to invite conversation.
Once a conversation has begun, the gaze helps to regulate the interaction by governing turn-taking and other transitions throughout the conversation. In western culture the gaze becomes very important to listening. American’s tend to look more when they are listening than when they are speaking (Trenholm and Jensen. 2012). The gaze shows interest when a person is listening and helps build the relationship necessary for effective communication.
Inherent and Learned
The gaze is not just something humans learn, studies have shown that it is inherent and recognized at infancy. As adults, how a person processes facial expressions is directly related to the gaze. The interpretation of an expression can change whether the gaze is at the other person or averted away (Hoehl and Straino 2008). Hoehl and Straino (2008) found that infants follow the gaze of adults to recognize something important. The facial expression that coincides with the gaze can let the infant know if something is positive or negative. Even primates use eye gaze to communicate emotional states or, as noted earlier in the study from Utrecht University, to attract attention to something (Call, Hare and Tomasello. 1995).
In Hoehl and Straino’s study they determined that faces with an angry expression looking at an infant caused an enhanced “attentional arousal”. This was in contrast to an angry face without eye contact. It would be reasonable to assume that an angry face coupled with eye gaze is a signal of potential threat.
The gaze becomes an important part of the communication process as humans mature. There have been numerous studies that show how facial expression is used in conjunction with eye gaze to communicate emotions or threats. Eye gaze is also used to regulate a person’s personal space. Personal space is the area that a person maintains around him/her in order to avoid discomfort or heightened arousal (Weiser et al. 2010). Nonverbal communication relies on personal space and eye gaze to regulate intimacy. Weiser directs attention to the “equilibrium theory” which states “there is a reciprocal dependence between gaze and personal space in social interactions” (Pg 547 ¶ 3). If a person intrudes another’s personal space, the recipient of the intrusion will avoid eye contact in order to regulate the level of intimacy in the interaction.
Courtship
For centuries people have been meeting and falling in love. We know love as a basis for marriage is a relatively new concept, however, the practice of courting dates back centuries. In the early days of courting it was customary for a gentleman to “call” on a woman. This practice was controlled primarily by the woman or her family. It was considered rude for a man to force his attention on a woman (Trenholm and Jensen. 2012). Generally, a man was invited to call on a woman by her or her family. The entire courtship was overseen by a chaperone and usually took place in the home of the woman.
In the mid-20th century courtship began to change. Instead of men calling on a woman the date evolved. The courtship moved from the front porch to more social public areas like restaurants, theaters, and night clubs (Trenholm and Jensen. 2012). Previously women controlled the courtship, but now men began to control it as it moved into their realm. This changed the perspectives and created a transfer of power. It no longer was appropriate for a woman to take any initiative in the courtship process.
In the later part of the 20th century women became more independent with feminist movements and sexual a revolution. Now courtship becomes a little more equal and either sex can initiate a relationship without it being deemed improper. This evolution has not only had an effect on the ritualistic practices of courtship, but on how partners communicate throughout the process as well.
Courtship Communication
There is no doubt that the courtship process is plagued with uncertainty within the relationship.
There are a number of different theories of how people may communicate when they are uncertain about their relationship. The uncertainty reduction theory argues that people work to predict and explain their social circumstances (Knobloch and Theiss. 2011). One of the roots of this theory implies that people experiencing uncertainty attempt to gain information using different communication strategies such as passive, active, and interactive styles. There are a number of other reasons people communicate including conflict resolution, to seek or provide comfort, to strengthen or affirm commitment, or to enhance solidarity (Knobloch and Theiss. …show more content…
2011).
Many studies suggest that people avoid communicating relationship issues during courtship (Baxter and Wilmot. 1985). These studies assume that people avoid discussing relationship issues because the outcome can be embarrassing and may come with threats that can damage a relationship. Two theories, the uncertainty reduction theory and the predicted outcome theory (Knobloch and Theiss. 2011), imply that because people who are uncertain may have difficulty anticipating any consequences of their actions, they may conclude that communicating relationship issues assumes too much risk.
One of the first forms of communication used to develop a courtship is flirtation. Socrates introduces us to the “Erotic Ascent”. The Erotic Ascent begins with flirtation and courtship and continues to concepts of an ideal and eternal form (Perper. 2009). Basically, what Socrates is implying is that the flirting throughout courtship causes humans to transcend from recognizing beauty as something more than just a physical attribute, but a deeper ideal that manifests and carries on throughout a relationship. Flirting is that first form of communication where a person takes the risk and then watches to see how it is received or reciprocated.
Non-verbal Communication
A term coined by Albert Scheflen called “quasi-courtship” described behaviors that could be identified during the “courtship readiness phase”. These were behaviors such as positional cues, preening behavior, and actions of appeal or invitation (Scheflen. 1965). Scheflen noted that people tend to do things like correct their posture, suck in their gut, or push out their chest when confronted with the prospect of a potential mate. These are all non-verbal cues that a person may not know they are doing, but may be subconsciously perceived by others.
There have been a number of studies that show people tend to mimic the verbal and non-verbal behavior of those with whom they communicate especially during courtship. Nicolas Gueguen conducted an experiment during speed dating sessions and found that the mimicking of the behavior of strangers actually increased the liking of the person who mimicked them (Gueguen. 2009). In Gueguen’s study he found that mimicry was directly associated with greater beauty of women in a courtship situation. It was also found that the person being mimicked perceived the interaction as being more pleasant.
Along with mimicry are a number of other non-verbal forms of communication that have been studied alongside courtship. In 2008 Nicolas Gueguen conducted another study to test the response of men to a woman’s smile (Gueguen 2008). I woman was placed in a bar and instructed to smile at some men and just look at others without smiling. The experiment indicated that men were more attracted to a smiling woman. Gueguen theorized that smiling increased the attractiveness of a woman. He also asserted that men may interpret the woman’s smile at a sign of her interest in them. Moore and Butler (1989) found that certain non-verbal cues such as smiling, flinging back the hair, or caressing an object could predict the chance of a man approaching a woman. Gueguen’s experiment indicated that just a smile was sufficient.
In today’s changing social environment a new form of courtship has made its appearance. Online dating services and social networking sites like Facebook and MySpace have become popular places to meet potential mates. According to statistics, it is actually more likely that a person will meet someone online than in a bar or at work or school (Altenberg 2012). Many people believe that online dating is only done by a small minority of people who are unable to meet people in the conventional fashion or because there is some kind of personal deficiency such as an undesirable appearance (Schmitz. et al. 2011). Actually, many dating services would offer that the realm of online dating allows an environment where a person can identify others they may have things in common with and narrow their choices while in a safe venue. Either way, how people communicate through the courtship process has evolved along with chat room slang, text acronyms, and emoticons.
Conclusion
The author has examined the basic tenants of non-verbal gaze and courtship. It is clear that eyes are an important conduit used to send and receive messages as humans communicate interpersonally. The dance referred to as courtship has evolved throughout time, but the communication required to be effective has remained inherent and, for the most part, constant. Although there has been many studies regarding courtship and non-verbal communication, the author was not able to find much that addressed gaze.
Theoretically, gaze could be one of the most important forms of communication throughout the courtship process. Gaze has been shown to attract a mate by showing interest during the pre-relationship phase. Gaze is then used during the courtship to communicate desire and emotion. As a relationship progresses, appropriate eye gaze is used to regulate conversations by showing interest and active listening.
References
Altenberg, M.
(2012). Playing the Mysterious Game of Online Love: Examining an Emerging Trend of Limiting § 230 Immunity of the Communications Decency Act and the Effects on E-Dating Websites. Pace Law Review. Vol. 32, Issue 3. Pg 922-954
Baxter, L. Wilmot, W. (1985). Taboo topics in close relationships. Journal of social and personal relationships. Pg 253-269
Call, J. Hare, B. Tomasello, M. (1995). Cimpanzee gaze following an object-choice task. Animal Cognition. Pgs 89-99.
Gueguen, N. (2009). Mimicry and seduction: An evaluation in a courtship context. Social Influence. Psychology Press. Pg 249-255
Knobloch, K. Theiss, J. (2011). Relational Uncertainty and Relationship Talk within Courtship: A Longitudinal Actor-Partner Interdependence Model. Communication Monographs. Vol 78. No 1. Pg 3-26.
Hoehl, S. Striano, T. (2008) Neural Processing of Eye Gaze and Threat-Related Emotional Facial Expressions an Infancy. Child Development. Vol 79. Num 6. Pgs 1752-1760
Moore, M. Butler, D. (1989). Predictive aspects of non-verbal courtship behavior in women. Semiotica. Pg 201-214
Perper, T. (2009). Will She or Won’t She: The Dynamics of Flirtation in Western Philosophy. Springer Science + Business Media, LLC 2009
Scheflen, A. (1965). Qusi-courtship behavior in psychotherapy. Psychology. Pg.
245-257
Schmitz, A. Sachse-Thürer, S. Zillman, Blossfeld, D.H. (2011). Myths and facts about online mate choice: Contemporary beliefs and empirical findings. Journal of Familiy Research. Vol. 23. Issue 3. pg 358-381
Trenholm, S. A Jensen. (2012) Interpersonal Communication. Seventh Edition. Oxford University Press. New York.
Wiesner, M et al. (2010). Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking. Vol 13. Num 5. Mary Ann Liebert, Inc.A. Woodward. (2003). Infant’s Developing Understanding of the Link Between Looker and Object. Developmental Science.
Jeffry Curry
Ottawa University
Eye Gaze and Courtship Have you ever given someone “the look” or felt attracted to another person just by the way they looked at you? Much of what is communicated by humans starts with the eyes. The author will examine a number of studies completed about eye gaze and human courtship in order to evaluate the correspondence between the two concepts.
Eye Gaze
There are so many ways in which we as human beings communicate. Communication begins before a word is even uttered or written on a page. One of the most basic forms of communication begins with a simple look, or as it is called by those who study it, a gaze. The gaze actually falls …show more content…
under the study of kinesics. Kinesics is the study of body movements and gestures including eye gaze and facial expressions (Trenholm and Jensen. 2012). Adam Kendon proposed that the gaze served three primary functions; expressive, regulative, and monitoring (pg 57 ¶3).
Communicating Emotions/Desires
The gaze helps people communicate their emotions to others. Although people use facial expressions, the eyes serve well to communicate fear and surprise. The gaze also identifies desirability in an object or another person or it can reveal a person’s intentions (Woodward. 2003). Anouk van der Weiden, Harm Veling, and Henk Aarts from Utrecht University conducted a study of how gaze shifts of other people can enhance and object’s desirability. In their study they found that a three-step process of looking at a person then shifting their gaze to an object and then back to the person caused the person to shift their gaze as well and communicated a desire of the object (Weiden, Veling, and Aarts. 2010). The study did indicate that facial expressions can modify the results, but absent other expressions this three-step gaze shift seemed to express desirability.
Monitoring Interaction
Gaze also regulates and monitors interactions with others (Trenholm and Jensen. 2012). The gaze lets others know that we are ready to communicate, or in contrast, can let someone know that we do not wish to engage in conversation. If a person is in a hurry and does not have time to talk, then they may avert their gaze and pretend not to see someone. If a person is not in a hurry then they may prolong their gaze in order to invite conversation.
Once a conversation has begun, the gaze helps to regulate the interaction by governing turn-taking and other transitions throughout the conversation. In western culture the gaze becomes very important to listening. American’s tend to look more when they are listening than when they are speaking (Trenholm and Jensen. 2012). The gaze shows interest when a person is listening and helps build the relationship necessary for effective communication.
Inherent and Learned
The gaze is not just something humans learn, studies have shown that it is inherent and recognized at infancy. As adults, how a person processes facial expressions is directly related to the gaze. The interpretation of an expression can change whether the gaze is at the other person or averted away (Hoehl and Straino 2008). Hoehl and Straino (2008) found that infants follow the gaze of adults to recognize something important. The facial expression that coincides with the gaze can let the infant know if something is positive or negative. Even primates use eye gaze to communicate emotional states or, as noted earlier in the study from Utrecht University, to attract attention to something (Call, Hare and Tomasello. 1995).
In Hoehl and Straino’s study they determined that faces with an angry expression looking at an infant caused an enhanced “attentional arousal”. This was in contrast to an angry face without eye contact. It would be reasonable to assume that an angry face coupled with eye gaze is a signal of potential threat.
The gaze becomes an important part of the communication process as humans mature. There have been numerous studies that show how facial expression is used in conjunction with eye gaze to communicate emotions or threats. Eye gaze is also used to regulate a person’s personal space. Personal space is the area that a person maintains around him/her in order to avoid discomfort or heightened arousal (Weiser et al. 2010). Nonverbal communication relies on personal space and eye gaze to regulate intimacy. Weiser directs attention to the “equilibrium theory” which states “there is a reciprocal dependence between gaze and personal space in social interactions” (Pg 547 ¶ 3). If a person intrudes another’s personal space, the recipient of the intrusion will avoid eye contact in order to regulate the level of intimacy in the interaction.
Courtship
For centuries people have been meeting and falling in love. We know love as a basis for marriage is a relatively new concept, however, the practice of courting dates back centuries. In the early days of courting it was customary for a gentleman to “call” on a woman. This practice was controlled primarily by the woman or her family. It was considered rude for a man to force his attention on a woman (Trenholm and Jensen. 2012). Generally, a man was invited to call on a woman by her or her family. The entire courtship was overseen by a chaperone and usually took place in the home of the woman.
In the mid-20th century courtship began to change. Instead of men calling on a woman the date evolved. The courtship moved from the front porch to more social public areas like restaurants, theaters, and night clubs (Trenholm and Jensen. 2012). Previously women controlled the courtship, but now men began to control it as it moved into their realm. This changed the perspectives and created a transfer of power. It no longer was appropriate for a woman to take any initiative in the courtship process.
In the later part of the 20th century women became more independent with feminist movements and sexual a revolution. Now courtship becomes a little more equal and either sex can initiate a relationship without it being deemed improper. This evolution has not only had an effect on the ritualistic practices of courtship, but on how partners communicate throughout the process as well.
Courtship Communication
There is no doubt that the courtship process is plagued with uncertainty within the relationship.
There are a number of different theories of how people may communicate when they are uncertain about their relationship. The uncertainty reduction theory argues that people work to predict and explain their social circumstances (Knobloch and Theiss. 2011). One of the roots of this theory implies that people experiencing uncertainty attempt to gain information using different communication strategies such as passive, active, and interactive styles. There are a number of other reasons people communicate including conflict resolution, to seek or provide comfort, to strengthen or affirm commitment, or to enhance solidarity (Knobloch and Theiss. …show more content…
2011).
Many studies suggest that people avoid communicating relationship issues during courtship (Baxter and Wilmot. 1985). These studies assume that people avoid discussing relationship issues because the outcome can be embarrassing and may come with threats that can damage a relationship. Two theories, the uncertainty reduction theory and the predicted outcome theory (Knobloch and Theiss. 2011), imply that because people who are uncertain may have difficulty anticipating any consequences of their actions, they may conclude that communicating relationship issues assumes too much risk.
One of the first forms of communication used to develop a courtship is flirtation. Socrates introduces us to the “Erotic Ascent”. The Erotic Ascent begins with flirtation and courtship and continues to concepts of an ideal and eternal form (Perper. 2009). Basically, what Socrates is implying is that the flirting throughout courtship causes humans to transcend from recognizing beauty as something more than just a physical attribute, but a deeper ideal that manifests and carries on throughout a relationship. Flirting is that first form of communication where a person takes the risk and then watches to see how it is received or reciprocated.
Non-verbal Communication
A term coined by Albert Scheflen called “quasi-courtship” described behaviors that could be identified during the “courtship readiness phase”. These were behaviors such as positional cues, preening behavior, and actions of appeal or invitation (Scheflen. 1965). Scheflen noted that people tend to do things like correct their posture, suck in their gut, or push out their chest when confronted with the prospect of a potential mate. These are all non-verbal cues that a person may not know they are doing, but may be subconsciously perceived by others.
There have been a number of studies that show people tend to mimic the verbal and non-verbal behavior of those with whom they communicate especially during courtship. Nicolas Gueguen conducted an experiment during speed dating sessions and found that the mimicking of the behavior of strangers actually increased the liking of the person who mimicked them (Gueguen. 2009). In Gueguen’s study he found that mimicry was directly associated with greater beauty of women in a courtship situation. It was also found that the person being mimicked perceived the interaction as being more pleasant.
Along with mimicry are a number of other non-verbal forms of communication that have been studied alongside courtship. In 2008 Nicolas Gueguen conducted another study to test the response of men to a woman’s smile (Gueguen 2008). I woman was placed in a bar and instructed to smile at some men and just look at others without smiling. The experiment indicated that men were more attracted to a smiling woman. Gueguen theorized that smiling increased the attractiveness of a woman. He also asserted that men may interpret the woman’s smile at a sign of her interest in them. Moore and Butler (1989) found that certain non-verbal cues such as smiling, flinging back the hair, or caressing an object could predict the chance of a man approaching a woman. Gueguen’s experiment indicated that just a smile was sufficient.
In today’s changing social environment a new form of courtship has made its appearance. Online dating services and social networking sites like Facebook and MySpace have become popular places to meet potential mates. According to statistics, it is actually more likely that a person will meet someone online than in a bar or at work or school (Altenberg 2012). Many people believe that online dating is only done by a small minority of people who are unable to meet people in the conventional fashion or because there is some kind of personal deficiency such as an undesirable appearance (Schmitz. et al. 2011). Actually, many dating services would offer that the realm of online dating allows an environment where a person can identify others they may have things in common with and narrow their choices while in a safe venue. Either way, how people communicate through the courtship process has evolved along with chat room slang, text acronyms, and emoticons.
Conclusion
The author has examined the basic tenants of non-verbal gaze and courtship. It is clear that eyes are an important conduit used to send and receive messages as humans communicate interpersonally. The dance referred to as courtship has evolved throughout time, but the communication required to be effective has remained inherent and, for the most part, constant. Although there has been many studies regarding courtship and non-verbal communication, the author was not able to find much that addressed gaze.
Theoretically, gaze could be one of the most important forms of communication throughout the courtship process. Gaze has been shown to attract a mate by showing interest during the pre-relationship phase. Gaze is then used during the courtship to communicate desire and emotion. As a relationship progresses, appropriate eye gaze is used to regulate conversations by showing interest and active listening.
References
Altenberg, M.
(2012). Playing the Mysterious Game of Online Love: Examining an Emerging Trend of Limiting § 230 Immunity of the Communications Decency Act and the Effects on E-Dating Websites. Pace Law Review. Vol. 32, Issue 3. Pg 922-954
Baxter, L. Wilmot, W. (1985). Taboo topics in close relationships. Journal of social and personal relationships. Pg 253-269
Call, J. Hare, B. Tomasello, M. (1995). Cimpanzee gaze following an object-choice task. Animal Cognition. Pgs 89-99.
Gueguen, N. (2009). Mimicry and seduction: An evaluation in a courtship context. Social Influence. Psychology Press. Pg 249-255
Knobloch, K. Theiss, J. (2011). Relational Uncertainty and Relationship Talk within Courtship: A Longitudinal Actor-Partner Interdependence Model. Communication Monographs. Vol 78. No 1. Pg 3-26.
Hoehl, S. Striano, T. (2008) Neural Processing of Eye Gaze and Threat-Related Emotional Facial Expressions an Infancy. Child Development. Vol 79. Num 6. Pgs 1752-1760
Moore, M. Butler, D. (1989). Predictive aspects of non-verbal courtship behavior in women. Semiotica. Pg 201-214
Perper, T. (2009). Will She or Won’t She: The Dynamics of Flirtation in Western Philosophy. Springer Science + Business Media, LLC 2009
Scheflen, A. (1965). Qusi-courtship behavior in psychotherapy. Psychology. Pg.
245-257
Schmitz, A. Sachse-Thürer, S. Zillman, Blossfeld, D.H. (2011). Myths and facts about online mate choice: Contemporary beliefs and empirical findings. Journal of Familiy Research. Vol. 23. Issue 3. pg 358-381
Trenholm, S. A Jensen. (2012) Interpersonal Communication. Seventh Edition. Oxford University Press. New York.
Wiesner, M et al. (2010). Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking. Vol 13. Num 5. Mary Ann Liebert, Inc.A. Woodward. (2003). Infant’s Developing Understanding of the Link Between Looker and Object. Developmental Science.