his own innocence from the fear of growing up. In angst of having others follow his circumstance, he strives to maintain the innocence of the children around him. It is now Holden's eagerness to protect the real innocence found in everyone, but it is somewhat impossible to do so because it is normal to grow up. He desires to do this because he wants to stop him and people (most likely children) around him from "falling" into losing innocence and becoming an adult. It is now his chance to attempt to hinder maturation for the goodness of him and others. As a young adult, Holden is anticipated to grow up and mature into an adult, but out of fear, he struggles to hold on to his own innocence. Somehow, he is frightened of growing up, and yearns the purity of childhood because the preeminent moments of his life are in his childhood. When Holden was thirteen, his brother Allie died, which had a tremendous psychological aftermath on him. Holden now obtains a negative implication with growing up and change. As a child, Holden had Allie and was carefree. But now, as Holden grows up, he loses Allie and is forced to endure his death and move on. When time begins to pass by, Holden is frightened by change because a couple of years ago, he has experienced change that led to tragedies such as the death of Allie. He also worries that conflicts with change may bring him more and more distress. This fear of Holden is relevant through his trip to a museum that he remembers from his childhood. While walking through the museum, he ponders to himself, “The best thing, though, in that museum was that everything always stayed right where it was”
(121). Holden wants the same pureness the museum has. He wants his life to be completely frozen and to have the inability to change, just as the museum is. In Holden's point of view, if his life was completely frozen, then he would not have to deal with growing up or to suffer the loss of loved ones such as Allie. Society expects Holden to grow up, but his most inherent concern of change anticipates him from doing so and causes him to contrive excuses. Throughout his endeavors during the novel, Holden experiences an internal altercation about change and bestows himself to saving the innocent children around him in order to hamper them from falling into the same fate.
Holden cherishes the genuine innocence and wishes he can go back to those carefree days. Holden's exertions to save himself from growing up eventually establishes attempts to protect other children. When Holden visits his younger sister's school, he spots a few swears on walls. He instantaneously rubs the swear on the wall and becomes extremely upset at whoever wrote it. Holden really wants to rescue Phoebe and her classmates from experiencing the brutal world, just as he experienced when Allie has passed away and was taken away from him. Phoebe asks Holden what he wants to be, and he replies: “I keep picturing these little kids playing some game in this big field of rye…and nobody’s around—no one big, I mean, except me. And I’m standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start going off the cliff.” (173) Holden wants to be the rescuer that will safeguard the innocent from growing up and experiencing pain. He wants to be the savior that he did not have in his childhood days. While saving these children, he prevents them from experiencing the pain he goes through, but these painful moments are exactly the ones that the children need to mature and develop. On the other hand, Holden never fully recoups from the death of Allie. It is Holden's impotence to shield himself of what causes him to protect others from a fate he could not save himself
from. Towards ceasing the novel, Holden finally starts to comprehend that everybody must eventually sweep away their innocence. Supposedly, his innocent sister, Phoebe, is his wake up call. When Holden mentions to Phoebe that he wants to be the “catcher in the rye”, Phoebe corrects him that the actual lyrics were, “If a body meet a body coming through the rye”. In that case, Holden misguided the song lyrics and reveals that he mislead his passion to preserve innocence. There is a scene where Holden and Phoebe are at a carnival, so Holden makes an observation: “All the kids kept trying to grab for the gold ring, and so was old Phoebe, and I was sort of afraid she’d fall off the goddam horse, but I didn’t say anything or do anything. The thing with kids is, if they want to grab for the gold ring, you have to let them do it, and not say anything. If they fall off, they fall off, but it’s bad if you say anything to them.” (211). This scene is referring the carousel to growing up. Phoebe and the other children on the carousel attempt to reach for the gold ring and grow up. Holden wants to accommodate Phoebe by trying to stop her from falling, but he suddenly realizes that all children must “reach for the ring” to grow up, and that it is bad to attempt to stop them. Holden finally comes to clench with this at the end of the novel, where he lets go of his foolish desire to safeguard innocent children. As soon as society pushes Holden to become an adult, his fear of change causes him to grasp his innocence. His greatest desire to protect genuine innocence brings him to the point where he tries to save the children around him. Holden's fearfulness of growing up can be defined back to Allie's death. His death created the absence of trust and fear of Holden in the outside world, and brings an unfavorable connotation to growing up. In Holden's case, he cannot bear to accept the death of Allie, the death of pure innocence that had no good reason to suffer or die. In Holden's eyes, Allie is truth, while everyone else is “phony.” Holden's request to grasp on to innocence eventually leads up into his piety to saving other children from “falling off the cliff”. But, Holden's little sister Phoebe symbolizes that all children must head for the golden ring and grow up. Now that Holden has done everything he can to protect the innocence of people, he has taken that fork in the road of adolescence when one realizes that maturity entails a loss of innocence—that greater knowledge of oneself, others, and the circumstances all comes with a price.