Expository Essay of Mice an Men

Carla Casati
Ms. Nash
ELA 10
28 November 2012
Would You Rather Smile at a Friend or be terrified at a Stranger?
It was a warm sunny day, like the ones you would expect in a summer camp; laughter was the melody that filled the air. Everybody was cheerful and enthusiastic, well everybody except one of our counselors. He was very worried, because his sister had been extremely sick, and nobody had been able to heal her. Everybody in my group had told him how sorry we felt for her, but really nobody connected with his situation, so we were not thinking about it. Instead we were immerging our souls into the contentment that was surrounding us. That day while we were acting, everybody was relaxed, focused and happy on what we were doing. We were living in our own little summer bubble. We decided to take a small break, in between the laughs I remember a friend saying “Isn’t it surprisingly amazing how beautiful life can be?”. That was the last sentence said before a cell phone rang and changed the course of the day.
The phone that rang was our counselor’s phone. He immediately picked it up and after a few seconds a bereft expression appeared on his face. The light in his eyes disappeared and his joyful air was replaced by a dour look. He slowly removed the phone from his ear, and with the little energy the shock had left him, stood up and walked away. We gaped at each other in silent knowing. How devastated he seemed worried me since I knew about the situation with his sister I was afraid to even think it could have been something to do with that. We were only missing a few minutes to then have a camp wide break, during those minutes the air surrounding us filled with a solemn silence. Finally after what seemed an eternity we heard the voices of the rest of the kids leaving to break so the counselor’s assistant told us to do the same. We slowly stood up and followed the crowed. We were so afraid and surprised that none of us spoke; I guess it was because we all knew the truth but believed that if we kept it silenced it would still be surreal. As I was walking towards the only solitary chair I could see, the laughter around me started fading, just like the happiness, my brain kept hoping even if it knew the truth. I guess I knew that his sister was know dead, but I was to agitated to want to believe it. I have always had a different perception about death than most people, simply because I was named after my dead grand mother. I remembered as a girl trying to talk to her to understand why I would be named like her, like a dead person. Finally I realized I was not named after a dead person I was named after an extraordinary person whom just happened to e dead. That day I concretized my thoughts about death realizing that as scary, and tragic as it may sound it was only someone looking over our lives, that we would then encounter at the end of our path. I lost perception of time, after sitting there for quite a while, the camp director came up to me followed by the rest of my friends and told me he needed to talk to us. I stood up and exchanged looks with my friends, this was it, it was going to be the moment, what we all thought as true, was going to become certain. We followed the director until we arrived to a quiet spot where we could only hear the echo of cheerfulness. With an extremely serious face, he told us our counselors sister had passed away; the moment he said it, it stopped being something surreal; instead it hit us, forcing us to face reality, the reality of a life that ends. Just before leaving he told us that we were invited to the vigil later that knight. As soon as he left some of us started crying, bough for our personal loss and for the counselors loss. The simple fact that he said it out loud made it seem so real to me, as if there was no hiding the pain behind the silence anymore. I felt such a feeling of shame, because I would be attending some strangers vigil when I did not even attend to my own great-grandparents one. That night everybody was wearing black enhanced by our puffy red eyes obtained by the crying. I did not know the age or appearance of the sister, but the one image that kept popping into my mind was the image of this charming, prosperous young woman; that had died, with still so much life to live so many mistakes to make and so much space to grow. In that moment was when I truly realized that life is unjust, it is ruthless and there is nothing that we can do about it. I was scared to recognize that it could have been me in her place, it could have been anybody. I realized it is not death we should fear, but life, and at its horrifying cards it can pull out on us. The image of death now was not just filled with pain and agony, but as an impetus to live life at it’s fullest. Once we arrived I had cleaned up the tears that had been gushing down my cheeks, and had tried to put a comforting smile on my face. As as soon as I saw how torn apart our counselor was I started crying and ran up to him to giving him a hug. I was not only crying because I felt sorry for his situation, but I was crying because I too have lost family members and the memory was refreshed in my mind, bringing back all the pain and sorrow. I stepped back and gave others a chance to do the same, and at the end as we were all crying he offered us to se his sister. Even though the question was addressed to us, the director with an immediate yes answered it.
He led us to the room where his sister was, and one by ne we walked in. Even though this was not the first death that I had experienced it was going to be my first time witnessing a dead person and I was scared, terrified. As I walked in and saw the dead sister I was so overwhelmed that I lost control over my emotions and the only thing I seemed able to do was cry; it was so powerful, since the first glance I could feel this connection with her, even if we were complete strangers. She was exactly how I had imagined her, young and beautiful, with a life to live in front of her. Even though this experience created in my mind a clearer prospective on death, it was also so devastating. I had always expected to see the first dead person with my family next to me. Together we would be commemorating the long life of the elderly person whom just passed away, but his, this was exactly the opposite; and I was not prepared for it. I remember that what impacted me the most was that she looked asleep but at the same time it was so obvious that she was not. It was that fin line between life and death.
As I walked around the tomb, I noticed how peaceful she looked. Even if life had played its cruelest trick, she still had a hint of a smile lighting up her pallor. I never asked where that smile came from; if it was forced or if she died smiling, but I will forever believe that she died smiling. I will forever believe that because that is what made me reflect on the shortness of life. Due to it’s limited time it is curtail for one to enjoy every moment of it, it made me realize how time runs and how unjust things can be; and reminded me once again that we have no power over them. It made me realize that we should live every day as if it was our last, because it could be; and nobody, at least not I, I don’t what to live a life of what ifs? Never the less it made me realize death is not something one should fear, it is something we should embrace so when our time comes one can smile at an old friend and not be terrified at a stranger.