Functional or Dysfunctional Families

Functional or Dysfunctional families

Family. What is the first thing that’s come into your mind? Love?

Hate? That there is no such a thing as family? There is no specific rule that

says families should be a certain way. Every single family has problems.

Therefore, there is no such thing as a completely functional family.

Then, what really is a functional family? Does anybody really know? Or -

may be- are we judging something based on a model that has been created

by our society? For example: the perfect family is where the wife stay home

and does her duties and the man of the house brings home the bacon. The

perfect children are the ones who never fight; in a perfect family, the

mother-in-law is a best friend with the wife. Not just in the immediate

family is there perfection, but also with the cousins, aunts and grandmothers:

everybody gets along with everybody else, and nobody talks about anyone

behind their backs.

In the world there are different types of families, each with their own

traditions, customs and values. Each one of them has their own particular

way of thinking. This doesn’t necessarily mean this is a dysfunctional

family. Actually it would be hard for us to identify what could be a

dysfunctional family or not. It is perfectly normal that families have

disagreements and fights because we as humans are not perfect nor have the

same way of thinking. The important thing is for every member of the

family to accept their mistakes and learn to respect each other’s opinions.

This reminds me of the movie “Little Miss Sunshine” where the family’s

older son decides not speak a word for nine months, the uncle tries to take

his own life because of a broken heart, the grandfather is a drug addict and

the father does not accept Losers in the family. This is a perfect

example of how each and every one of us has our own problems, opinions

and ways of dealing with conflict. It shows that at the end no matter what

their decisions is, the family should stay together and encourage each other

paying no mind to their differences.

We have learned that families are not perfect. We should not go by the

standard of functional or dysfunctional because the real issue is not about

measuring up to a standard. Since all human beings are complicated, we are

bound no to get along all the time. But we must work on doing so, not only

in our family circle, but also with all humanity. Family is a very important

part of life: what you have forever, even after disappointments, arguments or

bog fights. Good families will overcome their emotions and try to help one

another. Where this is impossible, friends become the family, but may never

be quite the same.