Austen portrays the theme of manners and etiquette as an extremely important concept which helps to propel the plot forward, by playing a large role in the establishment of the attitudes of society towards characters in the novel. She also uses this theme to show how people in the novel believe that a person's outward manners mirror their moral character, an aspect of a person which characters in the novel are constantly trying to evaluate, based on their behaviour in public. Austen also portrays the theme of manners in such a way that it helps to create a distinct boundary between the Bennet family and the Bingley family, by emphasising the huge contrast between the two families' social status.
The importance of manners and etiquette to society is used by Austen to show how characters judge other characters based on their individual actions and social decorum.
An example of this is when Elizabeth takes it upon herself to visit her sister Jane, who is unwell and residing at Netherfield Park. When she arrives at Netherfield with "weary ankles" and "dirty stockings", having walked three miles through fields to see her sister, the crucial importance of manners and etiquette to society is perfectly stressed by the consequent reactions of Miss Bingley. The fact that Elizabeth ignored the system of propriety laid down by society appalls Miss Bingley, and uses it to further insult Elizabeth's character, where "her manners were pronounced to be very bad indeed, a mixture of pride and impertinence", showing "a most country-town indifference to decorum". Miss Bingley uses Elizabeth's actions of that single morning to quickly base her whole judgement of Elizabeth's personality on, and Austen uses this to show how characters in the novel value what they believe to be social decorum.
The manners of Mrs Bennet and also Lydia Bennet immediately attract the scrutiny of Miss Bingley, as she notices how they lack the propriety demanded by herself. Miss Bingley expects all women to “possess a certain something in her air and manner of walking, the tone of her voice, her address and expressions”, and Austen uses these expectations as a reflection of the expectations of society, to which Mrs Bennet and Lydia definitely fail to meet, as Miss Bingley quickly finds Mrs Bennet “intolerable, and the younger sisters not worth speaking to”. Austen effectively uses the theme of manners to reflect upon the attitudes of society towards characters in the novel, which also help to create a social boundary between the two families.
An example of this distinction can be found when one compares the social etiquette of members of the Bennet family, namely Lydia Bennet and Mrs.Bennet, to that of the Bingley family. Mr. Bingley's two sisters, at the first ball, are said by everyone to be "fine women, with an air of decided fashion", and Mrs. Bennet also describes them as "charming women". They are seen to be as elegant and graceful, with flawless manners. Mr. Bingley is also described as being always “unaffectedly civil”, and having "a pleasant countenance, and easy, unaffected manners". The Bingley family no doubt have the best etiquette, but on the other hand, Lydia and Mrs. Bennet are the complete opposite, with their shared frivolous character and spirit, and the fact that Lydia is "a favourite with her mother" also implies how very much alike they are in character. Mrs Bennet has "weak understanding and illiberal mind", and is often found as the centre of scenes of acute embarrassment, such as the occasion when she loudly professes her dislike of Mr Darcy within his earshot. Elizabeth's embarrassment for her mother's sudden outburst is described as her "blushing for her mother", and Miss Bingley finds Mrs Bennet's lack of manners amusing, using it as yet another occasion on which she can mock the Bennet family, where she "directed her eye towards Mr Darcy with a very expressive smile".
Lydia Bennet also lacks the proper manners that she is expected to have in public, and Austen describes her as having “high animal spirits”, referring to her flirtatious nature and superficiality, which Elizabeth notices when she expresses how she is afraid that Lydia is “in danger of becoming a flirt in the worst and meanest degree of flirtation”, showing how Lydia’s, as well as Mrs Bennet’s, behaviour in public is thought to be highly embarrassing. The difference in manners between the two families clearly help to emphasise the difference in social status between the two families, and Austen uses theme of manners and etiquette to achieve this distinction.
On the other hand, Austen also portrays the concept of social etiquette as something which must be in balance, as in contrast to Lydia and Mrs Bennet’s total lack of manners, Austen provides a complete contrast : Mr Collins, who’s manners and politeness are subject to such exhaustion that they reach a point where he is ironically deemed equally as superficial and insincere as Mrs. Bennet and Lydia. Austen describes Mr Collins as having an air which was “grave and stately, and his manners were very formal”, and he is unnecessarily polite in every circumstance. Through the sycophantic nature of Mr Collins, Austen illustrates the theme of manners and etiquette as something which, although crucial to the harsh inclinations of society, must not be overused in order to gain the respect of other people.
Austen portrays the theme of manners as one on which characters judge their decided perception of another character's personality. For example, the manner in which Mr. Darcy behaves at the first ball in the novel affects the impressions of him on everyone else present, where they decide him to be "the proudest, most disagreeable man in the world". This clearly emphasised how people in the novel use a person's behaviour in public to determine their moral character, and how they instantaneously assume things which are based solely upon a person's manners and etiquette.
However, Mr Bingley’s sisters escape this judgment of moral character, because although they have graceful manners, their personality is certainly not a reflection of their social behaviour, as both sisters are cruel and extremely judgemental of other people. So, in comparison, Austen also uses the theme of manners and etiquette to show how the postulations of a character’s personality constructed from their social and public behaviour is not always a faultless idea, because most of society fails to see past the two sister’s being “fine ladies; not deficient in good humour when they were pleased, nor in the power of being agreeable when they were pleased” to see how they were in fact “proud and conceited” women who enjoy engaging in the mockery of people who they believe to be below them. The theme of manners is therefore portrayed as one which can not be the sole aspect of a person on which to base assumptions of personality and moral character.
The theme of manners and etiquette is therefore, one which is portrayed by Austen as a concept which is crucially important to members of society as an aspect which is used to judge moral character and personality. The high value that society gives to social decorum is used to distinguish an evident division between the two main social classes in the book, portraying the theme of propriety as one which plays a critically important role in the novel, as something which has a heavy influence of the characters' perceptions of one another.
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