Humorous Wedding Speech: Guilty Or Not?

There I stand, in the middle of this gorgeous but extremely terrorizing arena. This is my fate, my love for the princess will be demolished no matter what, i either die or marry another woman on the spot. There are people all around me, all screaming like the barbaric people they are. I see the king, gazing at me with his mean glare, waiting for my choice to determine whether i am guilty or not. Why did it all have to come to this, i only loved my rulers daughter, yes she meant everything to him, but as she did to me as well. I’ve never really agreed with the king’s rules, but now i see how truly barbaric yet amazingly idiotic his ways are. Finally, the crowd dies down and the princess, the love of my life, enters her father's cabin. But there's something different. She seems excited, but worried at the same time. The king says a few words, “ This man has fallen in love with my daughter, and has had an affair with her behind my back, losing my trust,” he says in his booming voice, “ tonight, we shall see if he shall be punished or rewarded, through my famous trial, picking the door.”
But, as i've told myself before, being married on the spot would have been good, if i haven't fallen madly in love with the daughter of the one has decided to punish me. Now's the time to choose my fate, shall a open the left door or right door, and which door contains which destiny. Desperate for an answer, i glance up to my beautiful lover. But then i notice, she is looking straight at me as well, and she seems to be trying to tell me something, but what is it. As i look even closer, i see it, he's telling me which gate to choose. Surly she knows best, “ i must let her decide my fate,” i think to