“It’s time for lunch!” the teacher announced. Candide was quite confused, as the clocked seemed to read 11:00 PM. He was very impressed with the teacher’s tremendous analytical proficiency, for she could figure out what time it was, even though the clock was clearly not accurate. As the loud and droning sound of the bell rang, all the children ran out of the classroom as soon as they could. “How fantastic! I can’t wait to taste the mystical delicacies of Diamond Bar High School!” Candide fought his way through the crowd, but eventually reached the lunch line. Standing in the hot sun, Candide squinted as he struggled to read the lunch menu. “Special: week-old rice with a side of mystery meat emulsion” caught Candide’s eye. Candide’s mouth watered with delight as his eyes feasted upon those words. He couldn’t wait through the long line, so he walked past ten people in front of him, stood next to an unsuspecting individual, and made a new friend. As soon as he received his food, he exclaimed, “This is fantastic, this is what I have been waiting all that time for! It looks too good to eat.” Candide stared down at his tantalizing and healthful meal as he picked it up and took a bite. “Amazing! This is the most enjoyable flavor I have ever had the pleasure of tasting! There is nothing I admire more than a pungent and flavorful mix of rubber and…