Life Struggles

Growing up, I always thought many powerful people were stubborn, selfish, and did not like change. Starting in middle school, I became very passionate about climate change and thinking of “easy” solutions to fix it. I would always tell my dad that "they" or powerful people should build windmills and other forms of reusable energy. I wanted those powerful people to change desperately to help with the global warming crisis.
At the time, along with my passion of change for a better world, it had been two years since my dad remarried and I moved in with him. During this time, friction between my step-mom and I was only just beginning and soon enough the awkwardness and tension intensified between us as time went on. We fought and had differences of opinions, and it did not help when I was caught lying to cover my mistakes. I also felt left out of my father's life completely where I felt like a guest of the house. At my lower points, I completely resented my step-mom and my father's choice to remarry. It also did not help that my grandma who I looked up to was lived two hours away and how we barely saw each other as she was the one who helped me out most throughout my changed situation. Looking back, I can honestly say that all the anguish, awkwardness, tension, anger and pain I felt was not at all her fault or my father's fault at all. The real reason for my dreadful response of the situation was the change itself. When I first heard about my dad remarrying, I was happy for my dad, but more concerned of what that meant for my life. I never gave my step-mom a chance nor did I ever view the situation from her point of view. My reasoning and logic was skewed before my dad even remarried. I was being a hypocrite by wanting other people to change when I clearly hated the idea of change in my life. Not once, did I think that this change in my life would leave me better off than before. I was my own enemy.
Fortunately as I got older, I began to understand and make more connections where I realized that I was better off with this change. When I accepted this, our relationship became stronger and healthier. I know I was wrong for the attitude I had towards her at first all those years, but from this experience, I now view conflicts, situations, and daily life from all point of views. I have become more caring and thoughtful of what I do and say. With my decisions, I include other people's point of view, so I understand the true extent of my decisions and consequences. Had I not been so closed minded of my situation, I could have avoided a lot of anguish but I am thankful for opening my eyes and looking at the big picture.