Lucian's POV Monologue
LUCIAN'S POV
(Soundtrack for this part: Sad by Josh Rouse)
Things started to change, Noelle became someone significant in my life. Someone I could stare at for a long time, I don’t want to understand what I am feeling because I have always been the worst person to handle emotions.
Dreams about her came to my mind every night, no more nightmares but dreams that made me feel good and so fatal at the same time. Good because in my dreams she knew about my feelings and we were one. My dreams were the only place where I could meet her and call her mine and bad because reality is reality that would never happen.
Open your eyes Lucian, Noelle is the kind of girl that deserves a boyfriend not you but a boyfriend. "Which artist do you like?" I randomly …show more content…
ask her as we make our way home from school. Noelle immediately looks up to the sky. The blue color of the sky comes alive with her eyes. "I don’t have a favorite but right now I like Ed Sheeran" she smiles sweetly. She misses my eyes. I don't miss the chance to look at her.
Okay now, what do I know about Ed Sheeran? Nothing, I feel so pathetic. "Oh yeah, I like his song, eh" I search in my mind.
"Give me love" I stutter unsure as we stop outside my house. "I like Kiss me" she looks at me and bites her bottom lip. It looks so sensual. I can't look anymore so I focus my eyes on the ground regretting hundred times
"Oh my God" I betray myself.
"What?" she giggles. Sometimes I think out loud therefore I wish that I could control my mouth.
"I'm thinking of talking to Elliot and Ray again" I change the subject. Noelle frowns at me but then forms her lips into a smile. "Yes you really should do it"
The reaction of her gave me the courage to talk to Elliot and Ray again. Even though I'm terrified I will see how it goes.
**
"We're so happy that you come here often" my mom wipes her lips with the napkin. Noelle smiles and I feel how my stomach explodes into butterflies, did I just thought that? "Right Lucian?" my mom pokes at me.
I chew faster. I know that my mom suspects something but can't she just be less obvious? I frown at her.
"Yeah" I murmur. "Maybe you can stay here tonight?" my dad suggests. I can't process until I understand. He wants Noelle to spend the night here! I choke on my salad and cough loudly. I think that I'm the obvious one.
I have everybody's attention which was the last thing I wanted.
"That's a g-great i-idea" I cover my mouth and take a sip from my glass. "Lucian, that's my glass" Noelle giggles. Oh my god. I blush intensely.
I wish I could press a button and delete everything I just did. But there is no rewind button or delete button. I would need one.
"S-sorry" I stutter. The rest of the dinner, I keep my mouth shut.
"This movie is so boring!" I complain as Noelle sits next to me. Maybe it's not that bad.
"It's not!" she argues back. "It's Mean Girls!" I groan and eat from the bag of popcorn. "You have never watched Mean Girls!"
"Because it's a movie for chicks"
"Well, I love it. I say that it is a movie for everybody"
I press pause and throw popcorn at her; I can see how she laughs. I didn't expect …show more content…
that.
"Wow Lucian you're very playful"
"Can it be because I want to do anything but watching a crappy Lindsey Lohan movie?"
"Okay let's play a game instead" she suggests. I don't look at her she makes me nervous. Fuck! I want to behave normal.
"O-okay"
"True or dare" she throws popcorn on my face.
I pretend like I'm thinking. "Ughh really?" I groan even though I'm jumping of excitement inside of me.
"Yes! Do you have a bottle?"
"We can use one of my pill bottles"
She jumps up and returns with a small bottle, the one's that takes away the anxiety. She looks eagerly at me. Why is she so fucking gorgeous? I can't take my mind away. I'm trapped in her, so stupidly stuck.
She twirls the bottle and then claps her hands happily with a triumphant smile. "True or dare?" she asks when the bottle is on me.
"True" I roll my eyes pretending to look irritated. I'm waiting for her question so eager. "What's your favorite song?"
"Run by Snow Patrol" I answer directly and twirl the bottle again. My fingers are shaking. I can't believe she's staying here tonight. The bottle turns round and round. I can't believe that she's looking at me?
"Dare!" she smiles. I giggle nervously. I'm so pathetic. I'm thinking of so many different options. "Nothing nasty" she interrupts my thoughts. I burst out in laughter. "Yell Penis from my window"
"How childish!" she complains. I can't contain myself; I have never laughed so much in my entire life.
Noelle walks towards the window and opens it. "You're going to die" she giggles. She opens the window and
yells.
"I can't believe I did that" she sits next to me and I'm so red after laughing so much. So this is what we do instead of being normal teenagers yelling weird and nasty words and not getting wasted at parties.
"Your turn!" she screams. "Yell, oh mama here comes your jelly bear!" she laughs. "What the fuck?"
"Do it!"
(Soundtrack for this part: Sad by Josh Rouse)
Things started to change, Noelle became someone significant in my life. Someone I could stare at for a long time, I don’t want to understand what I am feeling because I have always been the worst person to handle emotions.
Dreams about her came to my mind every night, no more nightmares but dreams that made me feel good and so fatal at the same time. Good because in my dreams she knew about my feelings and we were one. My dreams were the only place where I could meet her and call her mine and bad because reality is reality that would never happen.
Open your eyes Lucian, Noelle is the kind of girl that deserves a boyfriend not you but a boyfriend. "Which artist do you like?" I randomly …show more content…
ask her as we make our way home from school. Noelle immediately looks up to the sky. The blue color of the sky comes alive with her eyes. "I don’t have a favorite but right now I like Ed Sheeran" she smiles sweetly. She misses my eyes. I don't miss the chance to look at her.
Okay now, what do I know about Ed Sheeran? Nothing, I feel so pathetic. "Oh yeah, I like his song, eh" I search in my mind.
"Give me love" I stutter unsure as we stop outside my house. "I like Kiss me" she looks at me and bites her bottom lip. It looks so sensual. I can't look anymore so I focus my eyes on the ground regretting hundred times
"Oh my God" I betray myself.
"What?" she giggles. Sometimes I think out loud therefore I wish that I could control my mouth.
"I'm thinking of talking to Elliot and Ray again" I change the subject. Noelle frowns at me but then forms her lips into a smile. "Yes you really should do it"
The reaction of her gave me the courage to talk to Elliot and Ray again. Even though I'm terrified I will see how it goes.
**
"We're so happy that you come here often" my mom wipes her lips with the napkin. Noelle smiles and I feel how my stomach explodes into butterflies, did I just thought that? "Right Lucian?" my mom pokes at me.
I chew faster. I know that my mom suspects something but can't she just be less obvious? I frown at her.
"Yeah" I murmur. "Maybe you can stay here tonight?" my dad suggests. I can't process until I understand. He wants Noelle to spend the night here! I choke on my salad and cough loudly. I think that I'm the obvious one.
I have everybody's attention which was the last thing I wanted.
"That's a g-great i-idea" I cover my mouth and take a sip from my glass. "Lucian, that's my glass" Noelle giggles. Oh my god. I blush intensely.
I wish I could press a button and delete everything I just did. But there is no rewind button or delete button. I would need one.
"S-sorry" I stutter. The rest of the dinner, I keep my mouth shut.
"This movie is so boring!" I complain as Noelle sits next to me. Maybe it's not that bad.
"It's not!" she argues back. "It's Mean Girls!" I groan and eat from the bag of popcorn. "You have never watched Mean Girls!"
"Because it's a movie for chicks"
"Well, I love it. I say that it is a movie for everybody"
I press pause and throw popcorn at her; I can see how she laughs. I didn't expect …show more content…
that.
"Wow Lucian you're very playful"
"Can it be because I want to do anything but watching a crappy Lindsey Lohan movie?"
"Okay let's play a game instead" she suggests. I don't look at her she makes me nervous. Fuck! I want to behave normal.
"O-okay"
"True or dare" she throws popcorn on my face.
I pretend like I'm thinking. "Ughh really?" I groan even though I'm jumping of excitement inside of me.
"Yes! Do you have a bottle?"
"We can use one of my pill bottles"
She jumps up and returns with a small bottle, the one's that takes away the anxiety. She looks eagerly at me. Why is she so fucking gorgeous? I can't take my mind away. I'm trapped in her, so stupidly stuck.
She twirls the bottle and then claps her hands happily with a triumphant smile. "True or dare?" she asks when the bottle is on me.
"True" I roll my eyes pretending to look irritated. I'm waiting for her question so eager. "What's your favorite song?"
"Run by Snow Patrol" I answer directly and twirl the bottle again. My fingers are shaking. I can't believe she's staying here tonight. The bottle turns round and round. I can't believe that she's looking at me?
"Dare!" she smiles. I giggle nervously. I'm so pathetic. I'm thinking of so many different options. "Nothing nasty" she interrupts my thoughts. I burst out in laughter. "Yell Penis from my window"
"How childish!" she complains. I can't contain myself; I have never laughed so much in my entire life.
Noelle walks towards the window and opens it. "You're going to die" she giggles. She opens the window and
yells.
"I can't believe I did that" she sits next to me and I'm so red after laughing so much. So this is what we do instead of being normal teenagers yelling weird and nasty words and not getting wasted at parties.
"Your turn!" she screams. "Yell, oh mama here comes your jelly bear!" she laughs. "What the fuck?"
"Do it!"