Luhan

Kai’s teaser was released first and I was amazed by his dancing skills and all that. I liked him, I guess, but that’s that.
It was on December 23, 2011 when the second teaser was released. When I woke up, I plugged in the wifi and turned my phone on (it was holiday and there was never a holiday when our computer decided to screw up). I hurriedly went to facebook and I was scrolling in my nws feed and saw that a lot of my friends posted a youtube link that says SM released the second teaser featuring Kai and a guy named ‘Luhan’. Curiosity got the best of me so I clicked it and then, I found my new crush.
Crush because I never really knew him, he never had an interview, no other teaser or something that might be a hint of his personality. Luhan‘s face wasn’t even showed clearly on my poor excuse of a phone screen (so you can now stop calling me a shallow b**** who only liked someone for his face) and then SM released a statement that says ‘Luhan has the flower boy looks, he can sing and dance’ not the exact words but who cares? So I guess my crush grew bigger and I actually only watch Luhan’s teaser and excuse you, he has only two teasers unlike Kai who has 566546314567867. So when SM never released another teaser that featured Luhan, I didn’t care and apparently lost interest.
Then one day I saw somebody post a link of ‘What is Love’ by EXO M and spazzed, yet again, I clicked the link. And I fell in love.
So some fans call him ‘perfect’ and I never really believed in the concept of perfect. And you might expect my next words like ‘Luhan’s is perfect’ but no, Luhan’s not perfect but I think his imperfections made him better. He might sing a little too softly but that’s what I liked about his voice, he might be shy but that just proved that he was not a cocky jerk like some other celebrities, he might like skin ship with his friends hence, some fans mistaking him as gay, but for me, it just meant that Luhan was a very affectionate person. And I love him.
Call me delusional and say, “You only love what he shows,” but I’d reply with “You hate him for what you didn’t see and you saw nothing.” Luhan is a very helpful person – he stay up with Xiumin to help the staff carry the chairs and he help coordi noonas carry their bags. Luhan is very caring – he grab the hand of a fan that almost fell. Luhan is very hardworking – he says ‘I’m fine’ when evidently his eyes hurt because it’s red. Luhan cares about the fans’ wellbeing – he says something like ‘respect your parents,’ ‘eat more,’ and he even had a song called ‘Love the Future You.’ Luhan doesn’t care about fame at all – he does what he loves, what his passion is – performing – yet he knew there was a consequence: leaving his family, he could only look in disappointment when he realized his family hadn’t attended their showcase. Luhan is not selfish – he’d rather be the one who’s hurt than a fan in front of him, even if his throat was hurting, he shouted to the fans ‘Take care of your safety!’ Luhan is polite – he bowed to everybody, even to his fellow rookies. You call Luhan names that weren’t even true, you judge him because many people love him and thought that it’s because of his good-looking face. Well, you’re wrong – we live him because he’s Luhan, a gentle, hardworking and caring person.
Now, it’s his birthday and I saw a thread of photos of what fans had prepared for him and I can only stare jealously in return. No, I’m not jealous of Luhan and all those presents, I’m jealous of the fans who gave him something for his special day. What can I do? What can I offer? What can I give? I don’t even own an EXO album that would contribute to their career. I’m just an ordinary girl with an ordinary home.
I hope my love is enough for you because it’s all I have (and an epic fail edit too). I can only sit quietly, hopelessly praying for your health while the fans give you expensive computers, designer bags and nice clothes. I even wake up at midnight to sing happy birthday to you and I also prepare a candle that I could blow FOR YOU. I’ll give up anything just to make you happy which was ridiculous because you don’t know my name, we haven’t even met yet. But you know what, I’ve mentioned it a thousand times before, I love you. You’re not just any shallow, passing crush to me; you’re more than that to me. You’re my inspiration to reach my dreams, you’re my role model and I hope there are more people who are like you but to be honest, they will NEVER be you because you, Luhan, are your own person and I love you for being Luhan and everything else. I hope you’ll never change and I hope you’re happy – because seeing you happy was enough for me to smile about. Wow my grammar is all over the place. Sorry BB.

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