meals, over exercises, and eats as little food as possible. At the height of five feet five inches, she starts at a weight of 101.3 pounds. Lia references the “danger zone,” meaning the weight that will send her back into a hospital. She wears a heavy robe with quarters sewn in the pockets and rigged the scale for when her stepmother, Jennifer, weighs her once a week. Lia repeats hateful names and self-harms as a punishment she feels she deserves due to the pain of starving. Lia successfully drops down to eighty-nine pounds yet still cannot be assuaged. She craves the control and power she possesses over her body. “The only number that would ever be enough is zero. Zero pounds, zero life, size zero, double zero, zero point. Zero in tennis is love. I finally get it” (Anderson 220). Cassie plays a big part in Lia’s eating disorder. Cassie had bulimia nervosa disorder, causing her to overindulge then “get rid of it.” Lia and Cassie make a bet to become the skinniest. Even when Cassie tries to be healthy, Lia sabotages her recovery so she will not be alone. The dangerous competition results in the death of Cassie, who falls deep into her disorder and can not find her way out. Cassie’s final message to Lia is that she lost and Lia had won. The message infuriates Lia, and she continues her path of self-destruction. “I win because I’m skinnier. I’m double zero. I stayed strong…” (Anderson 222). Lia’s other goal is to stop seeing Cassie’s ghost.
Throughout the novel, the ghost of Cassie visits her often and worsens Lia’s eating disorder. Lia constantly reflects old memories of her friendship with Cassie. The death weighs heavily on Lia, even though she refuses to admit her grief. The ghost of Cassie tears down Lia, additionally hurting her low self-esteem. Cassie’s ghost seems pleased as Lia’s health deteriorates. Cassie mocks Lia, telling her to cut deeper and accomplish her death. Though Cassie also tells Lia how much she loves and misses her. “’You’re ugly. You’re stupid. You’re boring. The only thing you’re good at is starving, but you can’t even do that right. You’re a waste.’ She winks. ‘And that’s why I love you.’” (Anderson 244). When Lia stays in the motel where Cassie’s dead body was found, she sleeps through days and reaches her end. In her jaded daze, Cassie’s ghost tells her she will join her soon. Lia fights her own death, and finally overcomes the ghost of Cassie. This ghost symbolizes Lia’s eating disorder and it leaves when Lia realizes she wants to
live. At the end of the novel, Lia’s final goal is to recover. She transcends her eating disorder and realizes the importance and value of her own life. Lia wants to have a better relationship with her parents and step mom. She also wants to be the amazing older sister for her younger sister, Emma, which she could not do when she was sick. Lia does not sabotage her recovery this time. She listens to the nurses, and does not secretly exercise at night and in the showers at the hospital. Lia learns that missing Cassie is normal. She talks about what goes on in her mind instead of trying to handle everything. “There is no magic cure, no making it all go away forever. There are only small steps upward; an easier day, an unexpected laugh, a mirror that doesn’t matter anymore. I am thawing.” (Anderson 278). Wintergirls poetically told a powerful, emotional story about a disordered mind difficult to comprehend. I highly recommend this intoxicating novel to anyone who can handle the mature topics. Lia’s struggles may seem too gritty and raw for some readers to handle. Laurie Halse Anderson impressed me with her creative writing style and ability to successfully portray a girl with an eating disorder. Anderson’s realistic depiction of eating disorders may also be triggering. Nonetheless, Wintergirls spoke of self-acceptance, written with true brilliance.