My Being Adolescent

MY BEING ADOLESCENT

I don’t know if this is something to be happy about, or something to be depressed about, but I am currently standing perilously in the extremely thin boundary line separating two personalities. Confused? Well then, let us start from the very beginning!

Everything —living and nonliving, big and small, perceptible and not — passes through countless series of stages; each juncture is extremely momentous in its own part, so skipping is impossible. Life does not favor anything for it to endow them the privilege of jumping the track.

This is how my world works.

The universe ages and ages with each tick of the clock, and time carries with it inevitable developments. Here, change is compulsory and unavoidable—inescapable, but not entirely dreadful and undesirable. Birth is happy, death is peaceful; we were young, then we’ll be old; it’s perfectly normal and perfectly easy. So, why would people say that life is hard? It’s because the truth is, it is actually the transition that’s pretty troublesome. And that is where I am today.

Basically speaking, I am an adolescent. Adolescence is described as the transitional stage of a person’s life between childhood and adulthood, usually between ages 11-18. But to me, it is more like accidentally being stuck in the middle of a warzone you never had any knowledge of. You won’t know who’s right and wrong and on whose side you really belong. The changes are very rapid yet still very noticeable that you would have a hard time adapting to everything happening all at once.

Puberty It became evident to me that I am already in my adolescence stage when I hit puberty. Both these things are always side by side and inseparable. It is during this time when I experienced drastic changes in myself physically, mentally, and emotionally. My body started to develop and take shape. Even my way of thinking also began to deepen. Everything occurred in such a short time that the process went almost unnoticeable. It’s like a complete transformation transpiring overnight.

Identity crisis
I am quite like a child and quite like an adult, but I am not a child, nor am I an adult. This state of disorientation leads me to a confusing assessment of myself: Who am I? Where do I truly belong? What should I become? What am I supposed to be doing?
Losing track of who you are and feeling like nothing’s connected to everything else in your life is another part of becoming adolescent. It is what they commonly call identity crisis, a recurring problem that one will meet all throughout this transitional stage. A person will keep on looking and looking for answers and direction, never satisfied with him or herself. This is why the society at this time plays a very big role in creating my identity.

Peer Group Association
I have unknowingly become very self-conscious and I never even realized that I have started doing most of the things I do with the goal of pleasing my peers and not myself. It’s like my mentality has become all image and ego and fitting in with society. My way of living metamorphosed into a collection of influences from everyone around me because I am desperately eluding acting awkward for my age. I feel like I am losing myself yet at the same time creating individuality.

Indifferent
There is also the issue of me becoming very insistent in my independence and the belief that I can rely solely in my abilities. I don’t want to listen to anyone telling me what to do because my head is going over the top with the idea of misinterpreted existentialism: this is my life, the only one who can control me is me, everyone else should just get their own lives and leave me alone, I am already capable. This change of attitude brings out my rebellious personality, a typical adolescent character trait.

Mental conflict
However, it is in this stage when my frailty and vulnerability is at its pinnacle, thus the balance on which I am standing easily tips. The slightest temptation can sway me from my beliefs and ideals. It doesn’t matter how firm I believe; my inclination between right and wrong is irresolute unless I muster a very strong will to keep it in check.

Adolescence is indeed often the hardest hurdle in a person’s life. The future depends on the decisions in this stage because being adolescent is more than transitional; it is rebuilding a new self, planting a new seed of personality to nurture as one grows old. We need to keep right on track. Sensibility is the key, and openness is the asset. Acknowledging the opinions and advises of others, then putting them together as basis for our conclusions is what makes a sensible person create the right decisions. We need to have the ability to learn, the ability to outgrow our childish nature.