When I Take a long time, I am slow,
When my boss takes a long time, he is thorough,
When I don't do it, I am lazy,
When my boss does not do it, he is busy,
When I do something without being told, I am trying to be smart,
When my boss does the same, he takes the initiative,
When I please my boss, I am apple polishing,
When my boss pleases his boss, he is cooperating,
When I make a mistake, you're an idiot.
When my boss makes a mistake, he's only human.
When I take a stand, I am being bull-headed.
When my boss does it, he's being firm.
When I overlooked a rule of ettiquette, I am being rude.
When my boss skips a few rules, he's being original.
When I am out of the office, I am wandering around.
When my boss is out of the office, he's on business.
When I have one too many drinks at a social, I am a drunken bum.
When my boss does the same, he appreciated women.
When I am on a day off sick, I am always sick.
When my boss is a day off sick, he must be very ill.
When I apply for leave, I must be going for an interview.
When my boss applies for leave, it's because he's overworked
When I do good, my boss never remembers,
When I do wrong, he never