My mom and I have a great mother daughter relationship. We love each other, and I can talk to her about anything; I know that she would understand me and guide me as the great mother that she is. I have also noticed that my mom and I have similarities in many of our opinions, but we have our differences as well. Even though my mom and I were raised in different decades, we tend to agree in some points of views, and of course we tend to disagree in some. It is also understandable that things were very different before than what they are now, they are even different for me that I’m raising my own child. Having similarities and differences is a good thing because we learn from each other.
For example, my mom and I were discussing the other day that when she was young, girls had to date and wait to get married first and they would have a long dating relationship with their significant other, then in their honeymoon is when they will lose their virginity, and lastly they had their children. It works completely different now, that doesn’t happen anymore, women live with their partners for years before they get married, they may even have children before even getting married. In some cases, they move out and end the relationship without getting married or even engaged. My mother thinks that it shouldn’t be this way, that it should it be like it was back in her days. I told her that times have changed, and that I don’t necessarily think the same way, that now girls don’t have to wait for that to happen, and that it may even be better for them to live together for some time to get to know each other, before committing to a long term relationship. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that, however my mother doesn’t agree with that, she thinks that the order matters: dating, engagement, marriage, honeymoon and finally the children, that is how it was in her times. Now that doesn’t happen, some women even get pregnant without having a relationship; however, we both agree that it shouldn’t be that way. We both have the same opinion when it comes to having children, and that is that children are a lifetime commitment, and to have a baby you need to a have a solid relationship, you should be together with a person for some time so you can get to know them and commit to the responsibility of having children.
I am ok with not getting married before losing my virginity, in my opinion is fine if you have a boyfriend for 6 months or more and if you want to be with him I feel that is your decision. On the other hand, my mom sticks to the old times, she thinks that if you wait then men will respect you more and consider you more to be his wife. I explained to her that young people think differently now, and now girls and boys are more open to anything.
When she was dating, her grandparents will seat in front of her and my dad and chaperone them. Nowadays boys and girls go out on dates alone. She feels that it was better to have supervision on dates, and don’t agree I feel that you have to give children some freedom, chaperoning is not the answer. My mother and I do agree though those teenagers now have way too much freedom, and we both agree that this excess in freedom leads to bad behavior and conduct problems. During her times, young people couldn’t talk back or give their opinion until they were old enough to help out and support themselves, and they still wouldn’t even dare to talk back. This is also different now teenagers and even young children talk back to their parents and they are opinionate.
We both agree that as parents we should talk to our children about everything and make them feel comfortable to tell us anything they want and to trust us. We also agree that we can’t give our children all the freedom, and that we need to give them education and raise them well at home so that they can behave properly and be successful in life
Even though my mother and I have may have different opinions in certain aspects of life from the old days and the present, we also think similar in many other aspects. We both agree that children are important and that they need a stable family. We also agree that it is important to teach our children at home, and raise them properly.
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