Neil seems thrilled at the idea that he may be able to contribute a verse. He prompts Cameron to tear out J. Evans Pritchard's introduction to poetry. He is the one to call Keating "Captain," and is the first to ask what the Dead Poets Society was. He is also the one to organize the first meeting. Neil also tells Todd that he must participate in the club. Each are Neil's attempts to lead - to gain control over his own life. In the end, Neil felt he couldn't live according to his father's wishes, and the only way out was to kill himself. He felt that his only option in order to gain some control of his life was to take his own life. It was just as Puck said in his soliloquy, Neil was his father's dream. When his father woke up, his dream was gone. As the role of Puck, Neil is able to express what he could not when he wasn't acting. The Puck epilogue is said directly to his father, in hopes that his father will forgive him. He cannot say anything later when his father tells him what he expects Neil to do because at that moment he is no longer acting. Neil so desperately wants to have a verse to contribute, but he lacks the words, and can only say them while acting.
Neil, His Father, and the Suicide
Neil's relationship with his father is a case of misunderstanding and lack of communication. Mr. Perry wanted what was best for his son, which led to extremely high expectations. Neil wanted to find out who he was and what he wanted to do. Neil was unable to discuss his opinions and options with his father, and Mr. Perry was unwilling to look at Neil's outlook on life, as it did not appear as Neil had a concrete idea of what he wanted to do. This cyclical pattern led Neil to conclude that suicide was the only way to gain control of his life and stand up to his father. Neil only considered suicide after the major confrontation with him over the play. In the vast majority of suicide cases, suicide is an act that is contemplated for quite some time. Usually