Non-Traditional Family Adoptions

Non-traditional families People live the way they want and love who they want, we have no place to judge them for that. We should not take away any opportunities of adopting children because of their relationship statuses. Discrimination against non-traditional families and not allowing them to adopt children is morally wrong. The life of a child is a gift that every family who wants to have should be able to. Everyone should have the privilege to raise their own family and not be judged based on the race, religion, sexuality etc of the person or family, but based on the love and care the family could provide for the child. Families are being denied the pleasure of adopting and raising a child just because society views them as a non-traditional family. We should not have the right to take away a family or a person’s right to adopt children just because they are not the average people. Non-traditional families should be able to adopt children. A traditional family would be considered to be a married couple consisting of a male and a female. They are usually out of school and have jobs. Although this is the definition of a “traditional” family, a family, according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, is simply defined as “a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head”. These days the view on the typical American family has dramatically changed. Today families consist of all different types of people living under the same roof. In 1990, only 16% of all American families were living the way a traditional American family lived. Same sex couples have children, able adults are adopting children of a different race and culture, older women are becoming mothers, and single parents are more common; all of these are non-traditional families but they should still be allowed to adopt children if they are able to give proper care to the child.
Embryo adoption is a growing idea and it is an example of a non-traditional adoption. Embryo adoption is when a couple tries to conceive and they don’t use all of the stored embryos. They have the choice to “have the remaining embryos destroyed, to donate them for research or implantation, or to make them available for adoption” (“Non-traditional Adoption”). People can have the choice to put the embryos up for adoption allowing a couple to go through pregnancy rather than adopt an already born child. Regular adoption does not allow the adoptive parents to be able to have the feeling of a true pregnancy. For most couples, they would like to have children of their own but are not able to, so a solution for them would be to go through embryo adoption. It has been done before and much success has come out of it. For one couple Dan and Marilou Lyons, they had agreed to attempt conception with a donated embryo. “It was very new but we got our son, Jared, out of it” (quoted by Marilou Lyons). This may be a non-traditional family, but if they are capable of raising the child properly then they should have the chance to do so.
Not only are younger people being able to get pregnant, older people are becoming able to get pregnant and raise a family. Now younger eggs and healthy wombs allow older women to become mothers. Adriana Iliescu, a Romanian woman reported to be the world 's oldest mom, gave birth at age sixty-six in 2005 (Mooney). Some people may disagree with the embryo adoption because it gives older women a chance to also get pregnant and possibly raise a child. Most clinics will not allow women over the age of 50 to become pregnant. Clinics make up their own requirements, but most of the time it all depends on the health of the woman. It is an expensive procedure to have done, but it could be worth it if someone ends up having a happy and healthy family. Some people may argue that it is unfair to allow older women to become pregnant because the child would grow up with their parents in the seventies and would miss out on a lot of fun activities that younger parents are better capable of doing. This, however, is not entirely true. Older women can be just as energetic as young women, again it all depends on the health of the women. With the age higher there is however some risks of pregnancy, “older mothers are more likely to have complications like diabetes and hypertension during pregnancy. Their risk of delivery complications and cesarean section is also higher” (Mooney). This may be true to a certain extent, but with the right medical care and the proper health of the woman, doctors can make sure that the pregnancy goes smoothly, with little risk. There is even hope for women who are past menopause, they can still have children of their own with assisted reproduction, including egg donations. In some cases a grandparent of a child adopted him/her at a young age because of a certain issue with the birth parents. This also is considered a non-traditional family, but if the family is able to care for the child’s needs then there is nothing wrong with older people being parents.
Not only is being in a same sex relationship gaining acceptance with the public, but same sex couples adopting children is also gaining more acceptance. More same sex couples are raising children, “at least one of three lesbian couples and one of five gay male couples are raising children nationwide, according to a 2004 research paper from the Washington, D.C.-based Urban Institute, based on an analysis of 2000 Census (“Second-Parent Curbs Driving Same-Sex Couple from Arizona”)”. Some people might try to argue that same sex adoption should not be allowed because the child would grow up differently because the child does not experience a relationship a mother and a father figure. That, however, is not true. When children were adopted by either gay or homosexual parents, little to no difference was shown of the child’s development physically or mentally when compared to the adoption of a child from man and a wife (“Second-Parent Curbs Driving Same-Sex Couple from Arizona”). A lesbian couple of Massachusetts have two sons, both of which are biological sons of one woman and they are both adoptive children of the other woman. Though they are not the typical family that society is used to seeing, they are a happy family. When asked by citizens about their sons growing up in a home of two women, they always give the response “ 'Avery (one of the boys) is a very lucky boy who has two moms who love him” (Rice). If the two boys ages seven and three can grow up happily in a family consisting of two women then other same sex couples should also have the chance to adopt and raise a family of their own. They might not be the typical family but their type of lifestyle is gaining acceptance in America. America is the land of the free, you can make your life choices without being punished for them; if people choose to be in a same sex relationship and adopt children then they should be able to do so.
Single parent adoption, no matter what the reason, is becoming more popular in America. Some would argue that it is more difficult for a single parent to care for the physical, emotional, financial and spiritual needs of a child than if two parents were in the household helping. This opinion, however, is based on the limits of one person verses two of time, energy and financial resources. We can argue that single parents have a high level of emotional maturity; they have a high capacity for frustration tolerance, and are not overly influenced by other opinions. With only one adult in the household, they can be more involved in the child’s life (“Pros and cons of being a single parent”). If there were two parents in the house, there wouldn’t be as much pressure to spend time with the child because if one parent isn’t spending time with the child, the other one is. With one parent in the house there is more pressure to give the child the attention he/she deserves and that has to be done by the mother/father herself/himself. The parent creates a strong bond with the child and is more involved with the child’s life. Because the love of one parent can be the same as the love of two parents, single people should be allowed to adopt children. An uncommon form of non-traditional families would be polygamy. Polygamy is a type of marriage consisting of two or more partners. It consists of three different specific types: polygyny, where a man has more than one wife, polyandry, where a wife has more than one husband, or group marriage, where the family consists of many husbands and wives. The group usually belongs to fundamentalists Mormons. Although it is an uncommon family type, it still exists. They too should be allowed to adopt. Some could argue that the adoptive children of the polygamist family has the chance to be loved by more than just one mother and father. Interviewee Sharon Thompson said “the more people parenting a child the better! Children need all the love they can get! (Thompson)” In 1991 an article was released talking about a polygamist family adopting six children from a woman named Brenda Johanson Thornton. The family consisted of a husband, Mr. Vaughn Fischer, his two wives, Sharane Fischer, and the other whom was not mentioned. When Brenda Thornton died, she had signed over the custody of her six children to Mr. Fischer and his two wives. When they brought the case to court, many sided with the fact that "the practice of polygamy constitutes immoral conduct," and that it would not be "in the best interests of the children to be raised in such an atmosphere” (“Utah polygamists allowed to adopt”). They should, however, argue the fact that when a child is adopted into a polygamist family, they are able to be loved my more than the two traditional mother and father. Sharane Fischer said "The children are happy about the decision. The children have been with us all the time, so it has been life as usual" (“Utah Polygamists Allowed to Adopt”). Most fundamentalist mormons live in Utah and Arizona; “there are 30,000 to 50,000 individuals living in western North America who are considered to be Mormon fundamentalist (Troy)”. Because there is no real effect to children being adopted and growing up in a polygamist family, polygamist should be allowed to adopt children. Adopting children from out of the country is considered to be a non-traditional family. The United States started adopting children from out of the country after War World II. Along with the war “poverty and social upheaval have been critical factors in the adoption of children out of the country (Gailey)”. Throughout the past century, international adoption has become more popular. Figure one shows the amount of children adopted internationally from 1995 to 2001 (“U.S State Department”). The good thing about adopting children out of the country is that the family will give the child much better opportunities for a better childhood and adult life. Allowing a child from another country to be Figure 1: Data illustrates the number of adopted children internationally since 1995 to 2001. (“U.S State Department”) adopted into a family in the United States, the family is giving the child better health care opportunities, better education opportunities, better job opportunities, and a better family life. Adopting outside of the country would give the child hope. “The situations in other countries often mean that orphaned children receive far less care than orphaned children in the United States (“FactExpert”).Often times other countries are in poverty and adopting one of the children from those countries “could make the difference between life and death (“FactExpert”)”. One reason people would disagree with international adoption is that, in some cases if the child is two to four or older they already speak a different language other than English; teaching the child English can be a challenge. Another reason people might disagree is because the child is being taken away from his/her culture and might never get to experience his/her biological culture. This is not entirely true however. If the adoptive parent chooses, which most of the time they do, they have the choice to give their adoptive child experiences of his/her culture because no doubt when the child gets older they will have questions. Being adopted from overseas is not something to be ashamed of so why wouldn’t the parent choose to give the child the experience of his/her culture? Because the benefits of adopting a child overseas is much greater than the disadvantages of adopting a child overseas, parents should be able to adopt children internationally because although it is considered to be a non-traditional family, they still should have the right to adopt and raise a happy child. People disagree with the idea of allowing a child to be adopted into a non-traditional family because the child will feel different than the rest of the children and won’t know how to explain their situation of their family to others. Sometimes that can be true, the child adopted into the non-traditional family can feel different/out of place somehow but, it is important to talk to the child about the type of family they are growing up in, and that although they are not the same family as the people in his/her class, they are still a family and that it is just fine the way they live because they are still getting love and affection. Explain to the child that a family is just “a group of people who love and care for each other” (Hare 3). Non-traditional families are growing in America. Most families are non-traditional rather than traditional, “ There is no single typical American family anymore (Rice)”. As long as the parent/parents make sure the child is comfortable with and does not feel embarrassed by the family they are in, then everything should be fine.
No matter what the reason is for living a non-traditional family lifestyle, if the family is capable of caring for the child, then they should be able to have the right to adopt a child. It is unfair to discriminate against a family based on the way they live. If the lifestyle will not effect the child later in life then why shouldn’t the family be allowed to adopt children? Discrimination against people never ended, and it never will, but we should stop looking at a family differently and denying them of a family just because society considers them to be non-traditional. No family is the same, we all have our differences, we may not see them, but they are there; therefore, we should not deny a family the right to adopt just because their differences are visible. All non-traditional families able to care for an adopted child should have that right.

Work Cited
Gailey, Christine Ward. Race, Class and Gener in Intercountry Adoption in the USA, at 298-303, Intercountry Adoption: Developments, Trends and Perspectives, Peter Selman, ed. (2000).
Hare, Jan. Non-traditional Families. Oregon State University: Oregon State University, 1992. 3-6. Web. <http://extension.oregonstate.edu/catalog/pdf/ec/ec1412-e.pdf >.
Mooney, Calra. "The Beginning of Life." Bioethics. Detroit: Lucent Books, 2009. 9-22. Hot Topics. Gale Virtual Reference Library. Web. 12 Oct. 2012.
"Non-traditional Adoption." Adopting for North Carolina. Adopting.org, n.d. Web. 5 Nov 2012. <http://www.adopting.org/adoptions/non-traditional-adoption.html>
Rice, . "New Non-traditional Families." NBC News n.d., early ed. pg 1-3. Web. 5 Nov. 2012.
"Second-Parent Curbs Driving Same-Sex Couple from Arizona." Gender Issues and Sexuality: Essential Primary Sources. Ed. K. Lee Lerner, Brenda Wilmoth Lerner, and Adrienne Wilmoth Lerner. Detroit: Gale, 2006. 174-177. Gale Virtual Reference Library. Web. 11 Oct. 2012.
Thompson, Sharon. Telephone Interview. 5 November 2012.
U.S State Department, . International Adoptions. 2001. International Adoption FactsWeb. 6 Nov 2012.
"Utah Polygamists Allowed to Adopt." New York Times 29 March 1991, Early ed. n. pag. Web. 5 Nov. 2012.
http://adoption.factexpert.com/249-benefits-of-international-adoption.php

Cited: (2000).      Hare, Jan Mooney, Calra. "The Beginning of Life." Bioethics. Detroit: Lucent Books, 2009. 9-22. Hot Topics. Gale Virtual Reference Library. Web. 12 Oct. 2012. U.S State Department, . International Adoptions. 2001. International Adoption FactsWeb. 6 Nov 2012. "Utah Polygamists Allowed to Adopt." New York Times 29 March 1991, Early ed