Parenting Styles: Authoritative

Composition 1301-P78
2013, April 15 Authoritative Parenting: The Most Effective Parenting
Children are impacted by so many things in life, parents being the most influential. The methods in which parents raise their children impact their development as well as their behavior.
Not every child is the same, so children from different backgrounds can be extremely similar and children from similar backgrounds could grow up with entirely different personalities.
“Psychologist Diana Baumrind conducted a study on more than 100 preschool-age children.
Using observation, parental interviews and other research methods, she identified four important dimensions of parenting: disciplinary strategies, warmth and nurturance, communication styles, and expectations of maturity and control,” (Cherry, 2012, para.2). From these dimensions, researchers were able to conclude that most parents display one of four parenting styles. These styles are authoritarian, permissive, uninvolved, and authoritative. Each one of these styles has their positive side but authoritative is the most effective form of parenting. Parents will raise their child under these styles not knowing that they are also impacting the way their child will conduct themselves as an adult. The first of the four parenting styles is authoritarian parenting. This style of parent is known to have strict rules and expectations. The parent does not express much warmth or nurturing which was one of the four dimensions. The authoritarian does not give the child choices and utilizes punishments with little to no explanation. An example of this form of parenting is when a child is wanting to go out and socialize with friends that the parent does not want them talking to. The parent then says no, which in return, the child begins crying and argues with the parent. An authoritarian, in this situation, is going to ground the child for talking back and not respecting their decision. While other parents may also ground their child, authoritarian parenting will be stricter. Not only is the child stuck at home, but the parents have restricted them from any form of social interaction (internet, cell phone, etc.). The child gets impacted by this form of parenting and not all for the better. The children of authoritarian parents have difficulty in social situations as well as lower self-esteem. They associate obedience and success with love and some may even bring their aggression out on others outside of the home. This is what the children are accustomed to. These parents expect complete obedience, so the children are very good at following rules, even those not placed by their parents. Children from authoritarian parenting never set their own limits and they lack self-discipline. “While developmental experts agree that rules and boundaries are important for children to have, most believe that authoritarian parenting is too punitive and lacks the warmth, unconditional love and nurturing that children need,” (Cherry, 2012, para.4). Unlike authoritative parents, the children raised from the authoritarian style are not encouraged to explore or think for themselves. Then again, not all parents are strict, some could be quite the opposite in fact. Permissive parenting is the next parenting style which is the opposite of authoritarian parenting.
The permissive parent, who is also referred to as the indulgent parent, is very lenient with rules, if any.
This parenting style may use bribery to get a child to behave, which could easily make the child a bit spoiled. Parents who are permissive do not demand much from the child because they still think of their child as a baby. This parenting style makes the parent seem more like a friend but this is due to the lack of discipline. While this style is not the most effective, the parents do express a lot of love and care towards their child. Children from this permissive parenting style lack self-discipline and have poor social skills. Seeing as how the child had things their way in this style, they are also very demanding. “In a recent study, permissive parenting was linked to underage alcohol use; teens with permissive parents were three times more likely to engage in heavy drinking,” (Cherry, 2012, para.6). While some may enjoy being the “cool parent”, get involved in the child’s life and set boundaries for them. Uninvolved parenting, this form of parenting is often referred to as neglectful parenting.
“Uninvolved parents are like permissive parents in their failure to enforce standards. But unlike permissive parents, uninvolved parents are not nurturing and warm,” (Dewar, 2010, para.18). It is stated as such, for a parent’s lack of responsiveness to a child’s needs, besides the basic necessities.
Those parents that are characterized by this style have little to no supervision over the child. There is some variability in an uninvolved parent. There are those that may give their child curfew, to those that avoid the child completely. Uninvolved parents are just as the name states, uninvolved. These parents are emotionally distant and would rather deal with their own problems before demanding or expecting anything from their child. Children raised under this parenting style have an increased rate of substance abuse. Children from this style will have to learn to provide for themselves. Uninvolved parents make their child fearful of depending on others and the child will become apathetic because of that. Children that come from uninvolved parents are generally going to perform poorly at nearly every area in life.
Children need the parents to be involved in their life. Uninvolved parenting is most detrimental style for the child. From the worst style now comes the best, authoritative parenting. Authoritative parenting is also known as the democratic style. This is because the parent listens to what their child has to say and allows them to express their input in a situation. Authoritative parents encourage their child to not only express their opinion but discuss the options available. Parents from this style place limits on their child and, when they need to, they will give them a discipline worthy of their crime. “Like authoritarian parents, the authoritative parents expect a lot from their children, but also they expect even more from their own behavior. They are willing to say, "No," or lay down the line, but they are careful to remain calm, kind, and patient about empathizing with the child’s perspective,” (Lloyd, 2013, para.7). When a child breaks the rules, the parents will usually jump to conclusions and not allow the child to state his side of the story.
Authoritative parents, on the other hand, will allow the child to explain and judge their punishment based off of that. Children coming from authoritative parents are well-rounded in all areas. A child from authoritative parents have good social skills, they are self-confident and have a happier look on life.
Authoritative parents have good emotional understanding and control, so the child will as well. With this, the child will be able to not only manage their own emotions but read others’ emotions easily as well.
Since the parents enforced rules, the child will also know the social rules in a public place, even without the presence of their parent. This allows the child to be even more independent and able to accomplish more things on their own. The authoritative parenting style is the most effective as it has no down sides such as the other styles, yet it still brings in the positive effects that the other styles present. Therefore, while the other parenting styles may present some positive effects, none of them are quite as effective as the authoritative parenting style. Authoritarian parents are strict and limit the child but they do not put the warmth and nurturing that the child needs. Permissive parents offer the warmth and love needed but they do not set limits on the child and because of this the child will lack self- discipline. Uninvolved parents may set a curfew for their child, but when they have problems of their own their child becomes non-existent. Authoritative parenting includes all of these positive effects without the possibility of being detrimental to the child’s life. That is why authoritative parenting is the most effective style of parenting, if one hopes to raise a successfully self-motivated child.

References
Cherry, K. (2012). Parenting Styles. Retrieved April 15, 2013, from http://psychology.about.com/od/developmentalpsychology/a/parenting-style.htm

Dewar, G. (2010). Parenting styles: A guide for the science-minded. Retrieved April 15, 2013, from http://www.parentingscience.com/parenting-styles.html Lloyd, C. (2013). Parenting styles: Authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, hands-off
Different parenting styles | GreatSchools. Retrieved April 15, 2013, from http://www.greatschools.org/parenting/behavior-discipline/slideshows/6407-parenting- styles-authoritarian-authoritative-permissive-handsoff.gs?page=

References: Cherry, K. (2012). Parenting Styles. Retrieved April 15, 2013, from http://psychology.about.com/od/developmentalpsychology/a/parenting-style.htm Dewar, G. (2010). Parenting styles: A guide for the science-minded. Retrieved April 15, 2013, from http://www.parentingscience.com/parenting-styles.html Lloyd, C. (2013). Parenting styles: Authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, hands-off Different parenting styles | GreatSchools. Retrieved April 15, 2013, from http://www.greatschools.org/parenting/behavior-discipline/slideshows/6407-parenting- styles-authoritarian-authoritative-permissive-handsoff.gs?page=