Both of my parents were in the navy, that’s how they met and where they fell in love. They got married in 1994 and soon had two girls, my sister Breana and I. Growing up I always thought I had the “perfect” family, we went to church every Sunday, had family dinners every night, a happy family that cared for each other, we always spent time together, went on family vacations, and my Mom and Dad didn’t fight. Or so I thought anyway…
At the age of seven I started to notice a change in my family. My dad stopped coming to church with the family, came home later and later each night, and eventually started fighting with my mom all the time. One day after school my sister and I got off the bus like a normal day, when we realized something was wrong. My mom was waiting for both my sister and I at the bus stop when she normally just waited for us at home. When we approached my mom we noticed that she had been crying, she had red puffy eyes and wasn’t smiling like she usually was. When I asked her what was wrong she simply said, “We will talk about it when we get home.” At that moment my stomach dropped, I knew something was really wrong.
Divorce; the word makes many children shudder when they are young, and many children know the meaning all too well. I, unfortunately, am no exception. Right after my parent’s separation, "Who would I go with?” and “What would I say?" were the only thoughts in my mind while drifted to sleep every night. After my parents got divorced my life was dramatically changed; I now went back and forth from mom’s house to dads, things that were so easy now became hard, I had three step sisters who picked on me all the time, I started to hate my dad’s house, and worst of all I started fighting with my dad all the time. All these things eventually lead up to me leaving my dad’s house to live with my mom; this meant no more going back and forth, things suddenly got a little easier, my step sisters didn’t pick on me anymore, and best of all I stopped fighting with my dad. But I didn’t just stop fighting with him, I completely stopped talking to him. I thought moving out would make things easier, but I was wrong. I missed my dad so much, but for some reason I couldn’t bare myself to talk to him.
One thing lead to the next and I ended up leaving Albuquerque, New Mexico with my mom to live in Gastonia, North Carolina with my grandma temporarily. I was really happy at first to get to leave and get a fresh start, but very soon after I left I began to miss home. After waiting until my sophomore year was over I decided to come visit my family. My dad and I had worked things out after I called him one day, and when I asked him if I could come visit he didn’t deny. So on June 7th, I got on a plane to go visit. I didn’t realize how much more I missed my family until I arrived back in New Mexico and got to spend time with them. I spent a lot of time with my dad and told him how much I missed him, I also told him how much I hated North Carolina and after a long talk, we both decided I would be able to move back to New Mexico. I was so happy that I would be able to move back until it hit me. I would be leaving my mom back in North Carolina, the person I loved so much who was not only my mom, but my best friend. The one who was there for me when I needed to cry, the one who took care of me when I was sick, and the one who was goofy and made me laugh even when I didn’t want to. Every day I miss her more and more and it’s a struggle not being able to see her.
Through all this though, I have learned so much. I may miss my mom every day, but there are people who don’t even have one parent, and I am fortunate to have three who love me and care about me. I think my experience has also changed the way I see and treat other people. I also realized that no family is “perfect”. The ones that look the most normal are probably the ones with the most problems. My parents’ divorce caused many hardships and pain in my life, but it’s an experience that I would not ever ask to change, because I makes me who I am.
You May Also Find These Documents Helpful
-
Divorce is a rough topic to talk about. Divorce is like a disease never spoken, but seen. While, it is seen, it causes much chaos and destruction in its’ wake. Divorce is never easy to speak to children about. Divorce and…
- 573 Words
- 3 Pages
Good Essays -
It was Monday, May 30th, 2011. My family was driving home from a hotel we were staying at in Virginia, after going to Kings Dominion for my birthday day the day before. On the way home, we stopped at a Cracker Barrel for breakfast. During our meal, we got a call from my aunt telling us that my uncle, my mother’s brother, was in the hospital. Only a few days before he had moved back to Guatemala without saying goodbye to me. Once we were back on the road, my mother continued to get phone calls updating us about what was happening down there, as each call came through we all became more and more anxious wait for the answer. Then it came it just wasn't the answer we were hoping for, my mother began pushing on the walls of the car as if they were…
- 244 Words
- 1 Page
Good Essays -
The writers of Child Informed Mediation Study uses the child 's perspective towards divorce. "After divorce children do better when there is less parental conflict. (Particularly in front of the children or about the children.)" There are four credible authors that contributed to this article. Bates, Holtzworth-Munroe, and D 'Onofrio are all from the Department of Psychological and Brian Sciences Indiana University, Bloomington, Indiana. Applegate, another writer, is from Maurer School of Law, Indiana University, Bloomington, Indiana.…
- 634 Words
- 3 Pages
Satisfactory Essays -
Parents are often told to “think about the children.” Doctor Judith S. Wallerstein, the Executive Director of the Center for the Family in Transition, California, stated in her scholarly journal : “A comprehensive review of research from several disciplines regarding long-term effects of divorce on children yields a growing consensus that significant numbers of children suffer for many years from psychological and social difficulties associated with continuing and/or new stresses within the post-divorce family and experience heightened anxiety in forming enduring attachments at later developmental stages including young adulthood.” In this, Wallerstein is making the claim that divorce effects children so deeply that they suffer from stress, anxiety, and psychological and social difficulties. While these have been common results, divorce is sometimes in the well-being of all family members. If parents argue often, disrupting and terrifying children, (especially if young) then separating would relieve family members from the anxiety that arguments and fighting cause. Robert E. Emery, a Professor of Psychology and Director of the Center for Children, Families, and the Law, Virginia, claims experts are often confused on the true effects of divorce on children. In his article, he includes children whose parents’ marriage “was full of intense conflict and…
- 1392 Words
- 6 Pages
Good Essays -
Many people believe that everything is fair in a divorce. They take divorce as a win-or-die situation and consider the filing of divorce forms as the beginning of a war against their spouses. They may try all the possible ways and tricks to win this battle.…
- 426 Words
- 2 Pages
Good Essays -
50 percent of children in the United States watch their parents go through a divorce (Children-and-divorce.com). If you have 10 friends, 5 of those friends could have divorced parents. Do you know how it feels to have divorced parents? Maybe you do know, maybe you are a victim of divorce. Even though it might be for the best of the parents, the loss of stability that comes from a divorce affects children and even adults in many ways.…
- 616 Words
- 3 Pages
Good Essays -
" Hey kids we need to talk about something," mom says. My brother, and I look at each other strangely. Ethan asked "what do you need to talk to us about mom?" Divorce the legal dissolution of a marriage. This is what happened to my parents in August of 2009 they got divorced. It was a very big challenge for me to face. At first it was just a separation which happened in 2007 then slowly turned into a divorce. I was young so I did not understand a lot of it.…
- 397 Words
- 2 Pages
Good Essays -
to pay bills and satisfy our needs, we also supported each other’s sense of worth and striving…
- 639 Words
- 3 Pages
Good Essays -
As a young child I almost never heard my mother raise her voice to my father. They have been married for over twenty years now and I would consider all of them to be happy. She had gone to college to become a journalist and that's where she met my father. The two fell in love and got married before graduation. I suppose priorities or even interest changed because she never became a journalist. Selfishly, I'm glad she didn't as I have had her full attention since I was born. A couple years ago I was making my way home from school and I could hear a commotion coming from inside of the house. I dropped my things and I ran inside to find my mother crying and raising her fist at my father. Her eyes were filled with tears and her voice strained with anger. Silence fell on the room when they both saw that I was now present. My first instinct was to go to my dad and defend him, being as she was the one that appeared to be the aggressor. My mother just fell to the floor and wept. My father then instructed me to go to my room and they would talk to me at dinner. Of course I insisted on staying but I was directed once again to give them their privacy. An hour or so later I was called to dinner and it was then that I was filled in on what had been happening in our home. My father had been seeing another women for the past six months and my mother had just learned about this earlier today. You can imagine how embarassed I was to have defended him in the same room only a few short hours prior.…
- 378 Words
- 2 Pages
Good Essays -
“Many of the 1.5 million children in the U.S. whose parents divorce every year feel as if their worlds are falling apart”. Divorce is a common trend among our society today. People chose to get marry early since they think they’ve met the love of their life already. Maybe sometimes they even decide to have a kid while thinking carelessly. I believe divorce is a major issue in our society today; it’s not as easy as it seems and occasionally affects children who is involved in the divorce.…
- 494 Words
- 2 Pages
Good Essays -
It was 2009 and I had been in sixth grade for a couple of months. I was on the phone with one of my friends from school when my mom called through my door for me to come out into the living room. I ignored her and kept talking for a few minutes when she called me out again. I rolled my eyes and told my friend I would call her right back. I walked into the living room and it seemed odd to me that both my sisters and dad were all out there too. I watched my mom take a deep breath with my dad by her side. As she began to speak her voice shook and gloss covered her eyes. “The doctors found a lump in my last mammogram.” she said. “It came back as cancer. I’m going to have to get treatment but I’m going to be okay.” No one else said a word, we all…
- 965 Words
- 4 Pages
Good Essays -
When I was five years old, my parents got divorced. Through the separation process, and some years after, my parents fought a lot. They sometimes brought my 2 sisters and I into it, which was really frustrating. Growing up with parents who are divorced has been a struggle for me throughout my life. It’s hard to put into words my experience and ongoing trials I go through with divorced parents.…
- 996 Words
- 4 Pages
Good Essays -
I was so upset with my mother, that I didn't say a word to her and just went straight to bed on the couch, due to not having a room anymore. The next morning when i woke up, my phone and tablet were lost. I couldn’t find them, i thought i had left them in my dad’s truck, but my mom walked out of her room and said “I had taken your phone and tablet, i think it is best if you don't have them for a couple days”. The next few days i had stayed inside and didn't talk to anyone, i wouldn’t eat,drink, or sleep. My mom made me go to the doctors, and they had diagnosed me with depression. My mom had set up an appointment with an counselor. She had told the counselor that she needed her to explain to me why she did what she had done. I was stuck going to the counselor for a couple. She also requested that I and returned back to school and continue on with my life. One day after my appointment, I was waiting for my mom to come pick me up and stepped out of the car was my dad, it was the happiest day of my life. I thought that he was here to stay for good, but he was only here for a short visit. It was the best week ever, I hadn't seen him for 4…
- 832 Words
- 4 Pages
Good Essays -
About a year or so ago, my parents sat my brother and I down looking really solemn. At first I thought that my cat had been killed by a coyote or something (I’m slightly paranoid about my cat). Then I realized that I hadn’t seen my dog yet and normally he comes to greet us when we get home from school. He had been having some problems recently with odd possible cancer lumps and limping. I thought that he had been put down or something. Neither one happened. Then I remembered that my parents were always fighting, and that my dad and I would constantly fight too. This was it. Dad was moving out. Dad started speaking first. He said that he was moving out. My brother burst into tears. I merely sat there. I expected this. I had been expecting this…
- 1609 Words
- 7 Pages
Good Essays -
Life can be pretty rough after your parents divorce. The hardest time is the first year or two after the divorce, the effects can be long-lasting. Sometimes the effects of a divorce can influence life changing decisions for the children involved. This is just the basics of what happened in my life. I won't be sharing everything because not all of it's my story to tell. I can safely say that it's no longer painful to talk about and I'm happy to share what I can.…
- 606 Words
- 3 Pages
Good Essays