Personal Narrative

All my life I’ve felt like I was constantly reaching, constantly pushing myself to work hard and achieve goals that to me, didn’t seem difficult to obtain. I never believed that I couldn’t do it. But for 10 of the 17 years of my life all I was doing was reaching, never actually grabbing a hold of whatever it was that I was reaching for.
Throughout my childhood, I participated in many sports. The first thing I participated in was ballet, at the age of 5. At that age, I had set the goal for myself to become a ballerina. I went to my rehearsals, practiced rigorously, and enjoyed myself as much as possible. After a while, I began to realize that I was not a skilled ballerina. In fact, there were many girls in the class who were much more skilled than I was. I did not have the same graceful movements as the other girls nor was I flexible enough. Physically, I just could not compare. I became extremely discouraged and did not return for another year of ballet. This was just the first goal that I would fail to achieve.
This process of starting a new hobby, setting a goal for myself and then failing to achieve this goal continued for the next few years. Be it that I wasn't physically good enough to continue or because I just didn’t have the talent. Whether it were sports such as soccer or hobbies like guitar and piano, I just could not find my niche.
In middle school, and briefly in high school I had taken an interest in music and theater. My music teachers told me how much talent I had, constantly giving me positive feedback on my performance. I worked very hard to progress through my music career. I attended my lessons, rehearsals, and participated in NYSSMA; when a scored composition is performed in front of a judge. However, I never received solo’s in concerts or lead roles in any school plays. For me, it felt as if I was working hard and sacrificing time that could be used to enhance my school performance.
My sophomore year of high school I decided to take interest in new activities that I knew would benefit me regardless of whether or not I would be the most affluent member of the group. I applied for and set a goal to get into the high school’s Academy of Finance, a prestigious two year program during junior and senior year where students college courses to prepare them for a business career. The classes included are College Accounting, Macroeconomics, and many more. Not only was I accepted into the Academy, but I also found out that I did well in these classes. Finance eas something that I enjoyed and would definitely try to make a career out of. The same year, I also joined my school’s debate team. It was something that I sounded very beneficial academically. Immediately I realized that I was skilled in the art of debating and was put on the debate team with a senior who was already debating for 4 years. That year, my partner and I made it into finals for the first time in the high school’s history. Although we did not win, I still enjoyed every minute of being apart of the debate team and I’m still an active member.
What I learned through my journey unachieved goals is that one does not easily find what it is that they are good at. The obstacle in the way of achieving my goals was myself. I discouraged myself from continuing many of my sports and hobbies, and I never gave myself a chance to get certain opportunities that would have allowed me to progress. I learned that things do not come easily and when you work very hard, you gain so much more than you know.