Prince Hamlet and Ophelia: Intricate and Often Confusing Relationship

In Shakespeare’s Hamlet, Prince Hamlet and Ophelia have a very intricate and often confusing relationship with each other. While Hamlet has written Ophelia love letters, claimed that he loves her, and flirts with her, he also insults her, shows no remorse over killing her father, and claims that “I loved you not” (3.1.119). Hamlet’s behavior throughout the play poses question as to whether Hamlet ever loved Ophelia. While Hamlet’s behavior is questionable and his motives are often unclear, I believe that Hamlet did in fact love Ophelia. However, as the play progresses, Hamlet’s feelings for Ophelia become clouded, and his love for her becomes obscured.
While it is impossible to truly verify if a relationship constitutes as “love”, it may best be defined as an intense emotional, romantic, and sexual affection for an individual. Emotional affection is best described as caring for another and desiring to be around them, rather like “friendly” love. Romantic affection deals with the more intimate side of love, and revolves around desiring to have another person as your own. And sexual affection refers to physical and biological attraction to a person on a sexual level. Therefore, it will be necessary to make sure Hamlet exhibits (or did at one time exhibit) all these feelings for Ophelia. However, just because Hamlet may have these feelings for Ophelia doesn’t necessarily mean that he acts like he does. Hamlet’s motives for various actions throughout the play can be disputed; did he do it because he really loved Ophelia? Did he do it to further his charade of madness? Or did he do it simply because he was mad? These are some of the questions that you can use to question nearly all of Hamlet’s actions. Carefully observing Hamlet’s actions and motives points to the fact that he did love Ophelia before and at the beginning of the play. However, as many other factors affect his actions and thoughts throughout the play, his love for Ophelia becomes clouded, messy, and hidden behind his own anger and insanity. We also have much to gain by imploring Hamlet’s alleged love for Ophelia. We can learn a great deal about love itself and how it’s not always perfect, and also gain insight on the reasons behind Hamlet’s actions.
The first mention of Hamlet and Ophelia’s relationship comes from Laertes in Act 1 Scene 3, when he warns Ophelia to be wary of Hamlet’s affection for her (1.3.10-45). Polonius then enters, telling Ophelia the same, and ordering her to cut off contact with Hamlet, which she agrees to do (1.3.90-136). This occurs just before Hamlet encounters his father’s ghost, vows revenge on Claudius, and begins his charade of fake madness. After cutting off all contact with him for some time, Hamlet enters Ophelia’s closet, his clothes disheveled and soiled, and grabs her wrist and stares at her before walking away without saying a word (2.1.87-99). While it could be argued that this could be a part of Hamlet’s act of false madness since he knew Ophelia would tell Polonius, I believe that his actions are genuine. Considering that Hamlet has just seen his father’s ghost, learned the truth about his death, and vowed to murder his uncle, he is probably in a very confused, vulnerable, and emotional state. And so, the first thing he does is go to Ophelia, which I believe holds much significance. If you were feeling confused, overwhelmed, and were in an extremely vulnerable emotional state, wouldn’t the first person you go to be someone you love or care about deeply, or your “rock”? And while it may be argued that Hamlet scared Ophelia for his own personal gain, the ordeal is in fact a sign of Hamlet’s emotional dependence on Ophelia.
Another sign of Hamlet’s emotional (and possibly sexual) affection for Ophelia is the love letters read by Polonius in Act 2 Scene 2. In the letter, which was written before the events of the play, Hamlet refers to Ophelia as his “soul’s idol”, tells her to never doubt his love for her, and also mentions his affection for her “excellent white bosom” (2.2.109-128). Since these letters were written before Hamlet found out about Claudius’s betrayal, we know that these letters have nothing to do with Hamlet’s charade. I also believe that this letter does not involve any scheme or ulterior motive of Hamlet’s; he is simply writing of his affection for Ophelia, since letters between two people were (usually) very private. However, as the play progresses, his love becomes obscured by his anger and feelings of betrayal, which explains why his future interactions with her are not nearly as romantic or affectionate. Therefore, the love letter is a clear indication that Hamlet did love Ophelia, and is a solid example of Hamlet’s romantic and sexual affection for Ophelia, at least before the events of the play.
In Act 3 Scene 1, we get to see one of the first direct interactions between Hamlet and Ophelia. However, this is not a normal conversation between the two; Hamlet behaves in an angry, crazed manner, insulting Ophelia and telling her to get herself to a nunnery (3.1.121). Again, it is important to consider Hamlet’s mental condition and attitude at the time of the conversation: When he first enters the scene, he gives his “To be, or not to be” soliloquy, during which he contemplates suicide (3.1.66). If Hamlet begins his interaction with Ophelia by considering killing himself, he is certainly not emotionally stable. Another thing to consider is Hamlet’s attitude towards women at this point. After his father dies, his mother marries Hamlet’s uncle just two months later. If Hamlet had grown up seeing his parent’s relationship as the definition of love (as most growing children do), watching his mother almost instantly betray his father once he dies would lead Hamlet to question whether or not Hamlet’s mother ever loved his father. He does not lose faith only in his mother’s love for his father, but for the love of women in general. He expresses this attitude on multiple occasions, stating that “frailty, thy name is woman” (1.2.146), and remarking that woman's love is “brief” (3.2.157). Considering that Ophelia cut off contact with Hamlet soon after he’s seen lamenting over his mother’s betrayal and his distrust in women, it is very easy to understand why Hamlet see's Ophelia's loss of contact as a betrayal, and even why Hamlet may believe that Ophelia never loved him, just as he thinks of his Mother and Father. Hamlet also shows signs of his confusion and conflicting feelings towards Ophelia during the conversation itself, stating both that "I did love you once", and "I loved you not" (3.1.114-119). If Hamlet is suicidal, emotionally vulnerable, and now thinks that Ophelia betrayed and never loved him, he is likely feeling very angry and conflicted. And as we all know, when we are angry (particularly towards a person we love), we often act rashly and say things that we don't mean. I believe that Hamlet is doing just that in this scene; he feels angry and betrayed by Ophelia, and acts in anger and says things he doesn't mean. He believes that Ophelia has revealed her true nature by betraying him, therefore he tells her things like "Get thee to a nunnery" (3.1.121), and "Marry a fool, for wise men know well enough what monsters you make of them" (3.1.140-141). Another possible explanation for Hamlet's actions in this scene is his desire to protect Ophelia; He knows that, due to his plot for revenge, many people near and dear to Ophelia may die soon, including Hamlet himself, either through his plot for revenge or his own suicide. Hamlet is aware that Ophelia (at the very least) used to love him, and his death could have catastrophic effects on her mental and emotional health. Hamlet could be reasoning that breaking ties now with Ophelia may be sparing her from a crueler fate. And finally, one more reason for Hamlet saying what he does is that he is trying to convince himself that what he's saying is true. If Hamlet loves Ophelia but now thinks that she never loved him, he would likely try to convince himself to "get over her" and tell himself to move on. While it could be argued that Hamlet never loved Ophelia, this is very unlikely; if Hamlet loved Ophelia before the events of the play, I doubt that all of these feelings could have vanished in such a short period of time. I believe that Hamlet’s actions during this scene spring directly from Hamlet’s love for Ophelia.
The next interaction between Hamlet and Ophelia occurs in Act 2 Scene 3, when Hamlet and Ophelia are sitting down to watch the play that Hamlet will use to validate Claudius’s guilt or innocence. Before the play starts, Hamlet makes sexual quips and jokes towards her, asking to lie in her lap and remarking about lying “between maids’ legs” (3.2.121). While it may seem that Hamlet is just being affectionate, there are also other possible reasons for his actions in this scene. Again, we should consider Hamlet’s mental state; if he is about to determine whether or not he should murder the King of Denmark, he is most likely a bit nervous and on edge, and probably far more focused on the King than he is on Ophelia. He also probably believes that, if he proves Claudius’s guilt, his charade will soon no longer be necessary, as he will be able to get his revenge. Therefore, I don’t believe that his actions towards Ophelia at this point have anything to do with his fake madness. Another thing to consider is that this interaction could simply be a normal interaction between Hamlet and Ophelia: she doesn’t seem particularly put off by it, and it would be safe to asses that their previous interaction was far from normal. Hamlet was also shown to be rather physically affectionate towards Ophelia in the love letter, which supports this idea. This scene is a good example of Hamlet’s sexual affection for Ophelia. However, I believe that somewhere around the time that Ophelia and Polonius die, Hamlet’s love for Ophelia becomes clouded by his quest for revenge or by true madness (or a combination of the two). We’ve known that Hamlet’s mental state had been slipping; but how can we know which of Hamlet’s actions are from madness and which are from his charade? While there is a very thin line between the two, Hamlet’s behavior seem to suggest that he is falling into true madness. After killing Polonius, he shows no grief, but instead call him a “wretched, rash, intruding fool” (3.4.32). After being questioned of Polonius’s whereabouts, he rants in a near-crazed state and goes around in verbal circles (*.**.***) All these suggest that Hamlet is at least partially mad at this point. If he still loved Ophelia, wouldn’t he show at least a little grief over killing her father, especially if he knew how much it would she relied on him? One might argue that his actions at this point suggest that he never loved her. However, the correlation between Hamlet’s mental state and his love for Ophelia should not be ignored. Before the actions of the play, his love is shown to be very pure and affectionate (the love letter). But once he begins thinking about suicide, revenge, and his mother’s “betrayal”, he begins acting less affectionate to her (the conversation in Act 3 Scene 1). And once he kills Polonius and begins acting for revenge (and beginning to succumb to madness), he seems to disregard her feelings completely. I believe that this correlation helps to support both that Hamlet’s loved Ophelia and the fact that his mental state is slipping. Another possible scenario is that, after killing Polonius, Hamlet makes a decision to suppress all his feelings of doubt or grief or guilt. he knows that he’ll need to kill again in the future to complete his quest, so he decides get rid of all emotions that hold him back, such as his grief or even his love for Ophelia. He may have made this decision either consciously or subconsciously, and Hamlet’s reasons for acting the way he did are probably a combination between these and of madness. Soon after Polonius dies, Ophelia goes mad and later drowns in an apparent suicide. Hamlet’s reaction to her death is very important; after seeming to forget about Ophelia once he killed Polonius, he witnesses Ophelia’s funeral and, after realizing that it is hers, bursts in and grapples with Laertes. Afterwards, he claims “I loved Ophelia. Forty thousand brothers could not with all their quantity of love make up my sum” (5.1.271-273). What could this mean? Since Hamlet was surprised when he realized that it was Ophelia’s funeral and had been in England for quite some time, it is safe to assume that he had no knowledge of her death. And it seems that after killing Polonius and seeking revenge on the king, he forgot all about her. Now, after seeing her lie dead in front of him, he remember his used-to-be love for Ophelia, and is overcome by grief and regret. I believe that Hamlet acts out of passion due to his grief over Ophelia and his deteriorating mental health, and therefore his actions here do not have anything to do with his act or with other ulterior motives. He is simply grief stricken over Ophelia, and says what he says due to the feelings of love and regret that are left over from their twisted, tragic, and fatal romance. This scene functions to affirm Hamlet’s emotional affection and dependance on Ophelia, in addition to his previous romantic fixation with her. After carefully observing Hamlet’s interactions with Ophelia and exploring his mental development, I believe that he provides conclusive evidence that he did love Ophelia, at least until his madness and thirst for revenge causes him to lose his feelings of love towards her. He also shows evidence of romantic, emotional, and sexual attraction towards Ophelia, three components necessary for love. And while Hamlet might be initially seen as a play about death and betrayal, it also tells of a tragic romance, one which starts out pure and promising but soon falls apart through Hamlet’s quest for revenge. Interpreting, questioning, and understanding Hamlet’s love for Ophelia can help to shed light in both Hamlet’s actions throughout the play and on the nature of love itself.