Reflective: Why Women Choose to Stay Single?

In the course of this semester I’ve shaped my understandings of sex and gender through readings of diverse articles as well as discussions presented in class. Moreover, the cross cultural aspect of sex and gender allowed me to make changes to my previous beliefs about gender. The single life not only appeals to men, but to women. Historically, women do not enjoy access to the same opportunities as men, which limited them to marry just to make a better life for themselves. Today, I have more options than ever, and among those options is the right to stay single, which comes with a variety of perks worthy of consideration. For as long as I could remember, I have always dreamt of getting married in the Church my parents wedded in, in a beautiful, long, white, ostentatious dress. I have grown up in an amazing family with parents who really love each other. I have always wanted to find that someone to share the happiness my parents share. But within these past couple years, my dreams started to change. I no longer wanted to have this big wedding. My views on marriage started to adjust when I learned that my aunt has gotten divorced, remarried, and divorced again. Why would I want to put my children through that pain, and let alone myself? I believed, and still do believe that you can really only fall truly in love once. Having this negative influence of marriage around me made me really start to think. Did my aunt really love her partners? How could she love someone else? Wouldn’t it be worth fighting to fix the marriage? Rewinding to the past, around the early 1980s, my aunt married her first husband. They were “completely in love,” so she said. But after a year of marriage, and having their first child together, they divorced. Eventually she married again, and had two more children. This marriage lasted a long time, until 2008, when they divorced. I saw how hurt my three cousins were. They became anti-social. Their whole behavior changed. My guy cousin started to