Short English Story

Friday Night
Its getting late, its half past eleven and i should be sleeping. All i could remember is the incident that occured, its like a nightmare, everywhere i go, in a blink of an eye i could remember everything that happened on that night. It's going to be with me for the rest of my life. I think i need help...
All i wanted was for my family to be safe.. Now it feels like ive been living on my own forever, this place is like hell. After my family past away, i got moved to a foster home it was far away from everything and everyone. The owner was a complete bitch, we'd wake up every morning at six to help clean and start cooking, we showered once a week in a shared bathroom. I was so quiet no-one even knew what i sounded like, sometimes i even forgot what my own voice sounds like.
Here i am writing in this diary, letting all my emotions and expressions out, it was the only thing i ever told my story to. I cut every night, my blood gushes out like a tap all over my clothes. I feel so depressed, rejected, betrayed i just wish my life was over, and tonight i will end it, im going to sleep and never wake up.
Im going to write my story and i wish god will forgive me..
It was a friday night, usually on friday nights all family members would have to stay home, thats what dad liked.. Anyways we'd have games we played, activites we made up, sometimes we'd watch a movie. Before we started the games my younger sister and i had an arguement, it was a bit of push and shove, i felt like killing her that moment. Shes so spoilt and gets everything her way.
There was voices inside my head telling me she has to go, your better then her, it was taking over me. I was actually planning a way to get rid of her, i guess it was jealousy, since shes spoilt and gets whatever she wants. I felt like my family hated me, i'd always have to cook instead of joining their games. It hurt me lots. I thought and thought what i should do to take her out of this family, maybe then i could