Should We Spank Our Children Essay

This is the age old question that is so frequently asked that no one has a true answer. You have the people on one side saying that it will scar our children and nothing good can come from it, and you have the other half that believe it is the best way to discipline our children. So who do we believe? In my opinion I believe parents have the right to discipline their children, as long as it doesn’t surpass child abuse. I understand smacking your kid on the butt, but not on their arms or other extremities. In Introduction to Psychology by Charles Stangor, he explains that there are four different parenting styles; you have the authoritative parents who believe that their child will learn right from wrong through mature behavior and reason. Then, you have the authoritative parents that believe spanking or hitting their child is they way to teach them to behave, they also go by a very strict set of rules. Next, there is a permissive parent, who has very few rules and don’t really attention to their own kids. Last, you have the uninvolved parents who just leave their children to do whatever they want. The main ones that oppose and support spanking are the authoritative and the authoritarian (Stangor 184-185).
There are people in this world that find spanking their kid just utterly repulsive.
The even thought of a child getting spanked makes them uneasy. These people believe that spanking is 100% not effective and shouldn’t be done. People argue that spanking children will lead to the thinking that violence acceptable, and it can possibly cause them to have more violent tendencies and aggression (Finley). When arguing about spanking our children the opposing people bring up the subject of how spanking can be confusing to the child. What if they get spanked for hitting someone? How is that supposed to teach them not to hit, when they are being hit for doing that action? Kids can be confused from that and not be able to tell what is right and wrong
(Finley). Is spanking our kids really a health problem in the United States? According to an article written by Dr. Paul C. Holinger, he says that spanking our children is becoming a public health problem, and that 60% of parents still discipline their kids this way. Holinger believes that “spanking is a euphemism for hitting”, that our kids are more likely to hit their children and/or spouses when they get older. He also believes that by hitting out kids it will cause a bad relationship between the parents and the kid, and are more likely to have antisocial behavior than a kid who was punished alternatively (Holinger). In a article written a little over a year ago explains a study performed on whether or not spanking is linked to aggression later on in a child’s life. It was published in Pediatrics last May and in the article the scientists asked mothers of 3 year olds how often they spanked their kid. Almost half of the moms said that they had not spanked their child in the past month. Around 28% said that they had spanked their child once or twice, and about 27% said that they had spanked their child more than twice during the past month. The researchers also asked about the kids aggressive behavior at the age of 3 and then 2 years later when these kids were 5 the researchers asked the moms the same aggressive behavior question. The study added evidence to their hypothesis that spanking or hitting our children led to a more aggressive child when they got older (Mann). On one side we have the people who oppose and on the other side we have the supporters, who believe that spanking can be beneficial to the child. There are some parents that believe spanking their child will make them learn that if they do the wrong thing then they will get spanked, so they put a negative association on the wrong behavior (Finley). People believe that spanking is a traditional form of discipline that has been around for quite some time now, and it really hasn’t cause any problems or reactions until the last 30 years or so. Some of the biggest supporters of spanking are actually very religious people because the Bible has verses in that make spanking our children seem like a normal everyday thing. The quote “spare the rod spoil the child,” is the one passage that people turn to the most to when giving their argument on the acceptability of spanking. The quote though is not specifically supporting the physical abuse that people believe it to be (Finley). Instead of spanking your child, there are alternatives to disciplining your child. Some experts suggest that you can sit them out in time out or even give them extra chores to do on top of the ones that they have, if they have them. They believe that you should use positive reinforcement with the child to let them know when they are doing things right. Not just scolding them for wrong behavior, that way they can still feel confident with themselves that they can do right in the world. It is said the using positive reinforcers can actually reduce the negative behavior, maybe not take it completely away but bring it to a minimal. My own opinion on the whole situation is pretty much in between. I say that if a parent wants to discipline a child by spanking them on the butt, then go right ahead. To me that is not child abuse, that is just showing your child that consequences come with bad behavior. If you are a parent that just wants to sit down with your child and explain the wrong doing to them and give them another means of punishment, then go right ahead. I think a parent should be the one to decide how they want to discipline their own child, not the court system or some psychiatrist. People have been spanking their kids for hundreds of years and until recently is has seemed to be a bad thing. Just let the parents do what they think is right and leave them be. I don’t have a clue yet on whether or not I am going to spank my children, when it comes to that time I will figure it out. I was spanked as a child whenever I did something bad and I don’t think I am a bad person because of it. It was my parent’s choice to spank me and my siblings and maybe one day I will, maybe I won’t. I guess only time will on that subject. Maybe one day that might even make it illegal to spank your child on the butt, but who knows. Let’s just wait and find out for ourselves.