Sociology

Natee’ Hunter
May 26, 2013
Sociology 201/501
Essay Exam #1

Does Divorce Have Long-Term Damaging Effects on Children?

1. No: No Easy Answers: Why the Popular View of Divorce is Wrong written by Constance Ahrons, co-chair of the Council on Contemporary Families, from We’re Still Family: What Grown Children Have to Say about Their Parents’ Divorce. She explains at the beginning of her article that she was divorced and that the passing of her ex-husband actually brought her and his new family closer together. Ahorns says she has encountered many families whom have had similar experiences. She goes on to explain that in our culture we don’t want to believe that there is something like a ‘good divorce’. All we ever hear about is the bad situations and outcomes from it. Ahorns explains that maybe if we heard more of the good outcomes maybe our views as a society would be a lot different. Ahorns brings up seven misconceptions about divorce and defines why they are false. These misconceptions range from the thought of parents should stay together for the kids, children will have lifelong problems, divorce equals a dysfunctional family, divorces takes the father out of the picture, exspouses never get along after divorce, everyone turns into exfamily, and finally stepparents are not real parents. She also brings up that in our society there is no perfect way to raise children. And she does mention that divorce is stressful, yet it is not what brings doom to children’s futures (Finsterbusch 2011:47-54).

2. Yes: The Bad Divorce written by Elizabeth Marquardt, Director of the Center for Marriage and Families, from First Things. Marquardt as a child grew up in a divorced family and has had many years of researching this very topic. She believes that divorce does create long-term effects on children. She explains in her article that she conducted a survey of 1,500 young adults, like her counterpart Constance Ahrons whom surveyed 173. Marquardt compares and analyses her counterpart’s findings next to her own thoughts, feelings, and research. She believes Ahrons’ research did not fully address the underlying problem children face when divorce is their world, which is letting the children of divorced families truly express how they feel inside about the whole situation. She felt Ahorns’ questions were too much of ‘on the surface’ type questions. So with Ahrons’ findings, Marquardt felt that the answers from the young adults being surveyed would ‘of course’ be seen as a more positive answer, opposed to asking deep rooted questions. Marquadt, from experience expressed a feeling of needing to just ‘stay quite’ as a child as to not upset the adults in her life. She, as well as everyone else, could see that they [the adults] were facing a lot of stress due to the divorce. She goes on further to explain that this is one of the main ways divorce affects children. Divorce emphasizes the adults and their feelings above any of the children’s. She believes this makes it so easy for society to see and believe that divorce is a good thing, because the parents are no longer fighting and the kids seem quite and happy (Finsterbusch 2011:42-46).