In this term paper I came up with a topic that I personally wanted to research and to see what I can find out about marriages. i feel like in todays society your hear about divorce likes something normal. I remember centuries ago hearing about a marriaging slitting up was not normal, it was a sin. I wanted to know what affect the husband or wife to be frustrated with one another. Obviously one assumes cheating or misunderstanding one another of just or even can be the children. I always thought to myself can all of these factors really impact once marriages? If one commits the rest of their life to another human being then why can’t they deal with these flaws? if in their vows that one spends so much time trying get perfect “I promise to love you to the best of my ability and nothing will ever come between us” must mean nothing after a couple months or even years or decades. That’s so much time for one let go to waste just like that. I’ve witness almost a decade of a happy marriage, no one other than my parents. Also witness it go down the drain faster than what the ring goes down the sink. Also I want to analyze the outcome of the families and children in the long run. Symbolic interactionism is a big concept in this paper. A man develops both concept of self and their identites through social interaction. By his interaction with the world hes shaping how he or she views others his self and just starts to establish culture valves and norms. With his or her shape of the valves of life from interaction with others and families he/she are gaining understanding of what it takes to be a husband/wifes either because of their father or mother or uncle and aunt relationship. Social interaction is also going to affet on our prespective of understanding of being the right husband and what roles he or she is enchagred with. This may affect a marriage because of the fact a husband and wife can have two totally different views based of their social interaction they have experience in their life time.
In a relationship a million of things can affect a marriage. Self can affect a relationship tremendously. A women having low self esteem can affect her intimacy with her partner and how she thinks her husband may view her. For an example is a women when she was a child was picked on because she had freckles and red hair, then that will deffinelty bring down her self esteem. It can make it difficult for her to attain confidence with her image. This also can prevent her from opening up to someone that may find her freckles and red hair attractive. This poor self-esteem leads to her using hats or even make up to cover up what she thinks are her flaws. This also creates poor self image Another way self esteem can be affect is from family or even the media that can result in affecting his/her marriage. Im using wives as a example bcause we all know women are very sensitive to their appearance and how they look almost all of the time, if the media or friends and family are constanly mentioning how its important to be in shape or that its also about having big boobs, small stomach, big hips and a curves, something that over weight can easily be insecure about this self image. The media also showing all of these celeberites how they are skinny or all these talk shows discussing about whats hot and whats not all play a role in soceities expections in self image by individuals. Her self steem is going to affect her intimacy with her husband because she feels that her husband is not going to find her attractive; she going to be convinced that hes going to want a women that resemble the ones on tv or Hollywood. This women can eventually be embarrassed to show her body to her husband because shes afraid she wont be accepted. Self esteem doesn’t only consider physical flaws it can also consider fears, insecurities, or weakness. These are all factors that can affect ones marriage in the long run.
A way this can affect ones marriage is because if one of the spouse has poor self-image this can prevent one from reciveing constructive criticism. Constuctive cristim is someon trying to help you by telling you what is wrong with it or what you can do it improve on. If one is unable to receive constructive cristicism from their spouses then this is going to bring up consecutive amount of arrguments and problems. Not only having really poor self image is bad but even high self image can be negative thing. Someone who thinks of themslef better then everyone or thinking everything this do is right and that their perfect and thinking that without them one’s life isn’t complete, then this can prevent someone from receiving constructive cristicm from their love one. in marriages another factor that can affect marriage is how much an individual receives social distress. What social distress is a disruption in ones social life (changes in roles, relationships, sense of belonging, sexual function and appearance) that causes a suffering of mind or body. So a social distress can be as simple as their change of status in society. Even from going from single to a husband can cause some suffering of their mind and body. A spouse adjusting to marriage and experiencing the real deal of marriage when they move in with each can be a big change for someone. A couple can get distress from the whole idea of moving into a house or a apartment, or whether the wife once to move to one area verse another area the husband may want to be located. Even just picking furniture for the house can cause distress for any of the spouses.
Another social distress factor that can affect a marriage negativiely is from major life transitions. A husband can get a advancment in his career with it causes him to work more hours and be on the road, away from home or his family. This is going to create more conflict wit his wife because his worplace is expecting him to step up and do his job. His wife is happy for him but at the same time she isn’t satified with his attendence to family or her attention. So this starts to shape his self concept. This also to affect his role he has in his family. Since his role has changed he is achieving a much higher social status its restricting time with his loved ones. His experience to social interaction has accustom him to attaining a 40 hour job that pays a good salary to purpose his family because that’s what he may have viewed his father role was as a father when he was a child. His prespective of a wife role can be a stay at home mom and achieve roles that may be attained by wives. This can be a misunderstanding between the two of them because of their different meaning in marriage. Especially in todays world it can be easily miscommunication. She may think of marriage where women has more of right to be head of house hold. Were she agrees to feel that she can work a 40 hour job as well and as for him to particatpe a little more around the house. Because of their symbolic interaction of the meaning of roles a husband and wife may play can affect them. This is where they willl have to develop communication skills to determine the roles they will both play in their marriage.
Also interpreting the meaning of marriage which comes from social interaction. Over the past decades the meaning and the actual commitment we hold for marrage is losing its values. We look back 50 years ago you were able to see more marriage last a life time unlike in todays day 50% of marriages are leading to divorce within a couple of years. Which comes to show how much things are changing. We are starting to change the meaning and the symbol of husband an wife, or what it takes to be married.
What causes a marriage to fall apart?
Questions:
1. What are some things that can affect a marriage
2. Can social stress affect marriage
3. is there ways of avoiding these social stress in marriages
4. is it because of children that people get divorced
5. what can be some social object that the husband and wife have in common or can create for a better relationship
6. Can some social object hurt a marriage?
7. Can social pressure being a reason for rushing marriage ?
8. Does social class have anything to do with divorce ?
9. Ideas:
I feel like this paper is in social psychology because I can talk about social object a husband and wife can have and see if maybe those factors take a role in their marriage, if it’s for the positive or negative. Maybe I can be able to analyze the exchange theory in this situation see maybe how one exchanges respect to one another in their relationship. See how one not getting the same respect can lead to fighting or disrespect in this relationship. I can also talk about the symbols in my topic. Maybe a main has a strong symbol of women as being a house wife who stays home and cleans n cooks and does laundry which now in days that’s becoming more of a stereotype. I also can talk about social stress that both the husband and wife can attain from house their homes which can lead to this disagreements or frustration which falls into social psychology. http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2013/02/17/4-reasons-your-marriage-may-be-susceptible-to-divorce/ http://journal-archieves16.webs.com/500-513.pdf http://socialmediatoday.com/houstondivorce/1106716/social-cheating-increasing-influence-social-media-divorces http://www.fathersforgood.org/ffg/en/husband_wife/archive/social_media.html
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/divorce-grownups/200805/the-psychology-divorce-0 http://pubpages.unh.edu/~mas2/Social%20Causes%20of%20Husband-wife-Straus.pdf http://www.apa.org/monitor/2013/04/marriage.aspx
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http://strongermarriage.org/htm/married/factors-that-make-a-difference-in-marital-success http://www.todaysmodernfamily.com/index.php/2790 Presentation social influence that may cause an divorce
Todays society you hear so many marriages ending up in a divorce within a couple of months or years.
Why is that?
A big reasin is rushing into a marriage
Family or social pressure – family where they are constantly asking where they are going to get marriage when they’ve been dating for so 2 to 3 years,
Parental Approval
Seeing marriage as a act of approval from your parents to adult hood
Can be a forma of rebellion when it comes to family or parents
Society how they push everyone to thinking they need to getting married, or your need to get married and start a family, its part of the culture
Or for women if they pasted the social acceptance age for her getting marriage then there’s something wrong, making her insecure
Do Opposites Attract? In general, the more similar a couple's background in terms of education, religion, nationality, and social status, the better.
Negative influence on your marriage, family, friends , giving shady advice , or trying to make decisions for you in your relationship,
Social stress
Children has to do with marriage, spending time with children, financial responsibilities, one’s debt, credit card, money management, friends, car problems having one account of them being under the husband account, not enough money, not getting what they want to get ahead in life one working more then the other, making more money spending more then ones making money management buying things society wants you to buy, new car, tevelsion , new cell phones work, working so much not leaving enough time for the spouse, working opposite shifts, not enough time for each other not enough intimacy not going on enough dates physical abuse can be a big issue, some men think hitting a women is showing their place in the house hold as head of the house hold
Household responsibility
Sharing the household duties is a real challenge for traditional men
The greatest conflicts occur when wives are more contemporary than husbands in what they consider the "right" roles for husbands and wives.
Especially more in today society where women our getting more rights and power they are thinking more of them selves believing that they worth more then saying at home and being a house wive or a stay at home mom. Feeling more independent
Social networking & Social Cheating
Social Media is Allowing People to Reconnect, Sometimes in Ways Damaging to Their Marriage
Is Social Media Good For Your Marriage?
Intimacy: Staying connected with family and friends cant be a very good idea and sharing private ideas or emotions or activities may think your getting closers with friends but hurting ones relationship , breaking that privacy boundary line
Facebook Status
Time: making social media like , checking emails , texting , face booking, other social networks and as a daily habit and making time for your partner as a exception can cause a big problem.
Diversions: when facing serious problems we use the social media to find out on twitter, Facebook, or Instagram where are friends our or texting to not face intimacy/relationship problems Recent data released by the American Association of Trial Lawyers shows that 81 percent of all divorce cases in the last year used some form of evidence from a social media site when presenting their case , like facebook
Looking at all of the concept in social psychology I can see how they may apply to varies point in this topic I have chosen. I’ll be able to determine what simple factors in a husband or wives everyday interaction can affect a unhealthy relationship that may lead to a divorced. There even some social objects that can affect a relationship. For a example children can play a huge parts in this. I was reading a article online that talks about divorced marriages. It mentions how marriages after their birth child increases stress and frustration. Not even the toughest relationship would be able to stand strong. I read this article on America Psychological Association that research shows that Couple usually stress over every day factors like problems at work, or even traffic. There’s a majority of marriages that end up in divorce because of their finical problems. Money is always a big problem in a marriage; it either has to do with differences on saving it or how to spend it. This all depends on how one manages their money. If someone in a relationship has problems managing money, there will probably be frequently arguing between the partners about their money issue. Of course if someone is reckless with their money, they will have to face it and confront their problem and come up with some finical improvement plan to maybe manage how to handle their money problems.
Its so available for anyone that it allows your to do so many things by being under radar ,
New leads http://www.csun.edu/~whw2380/542/Symbolic%20Interactionism%20Lecture.htm http://www.focusonthefamily.ca/Intimacy-Romance/q-a-frequency-of-marital-intercourse.html