Struggling Author
The Life and Times of a Struggling Author
“In the sunny village of Alexandria, there lived a happy family of four. The wife and husband had a strong, tenacious bond and had pledged a never-ending fidelity to each other. They deeply loved each other and their children and vowed to give them a wonderful childhood.” “One unfortunate day, the youngest fell dangerously ill. The mother and father were distraught and knew the only way to save the child was to visit a healer-witch rumored to be living in the woods. The father took the youngest while the mother and the elder sister stayed at home, fervently praying for their safe return. The brave father hiked along a rough mount path carrying his daughter with as many provisions as they could afford to pack, although the status quo for people like them—” …show more content…
Oh… my… god.
What the heck is the cat doing in here? He's scratching all of my stuff. “Get out, you no-good vermin, with your… infinitesimal brain of a deranged worm.” Gah, look at the time. I should get back to work. Oh, and now the window is open. Ughhh. Why does this stuff happen to me? “C’mon, Gerald, pull yourself together,” I murmur to myself. Okay, what's next? Hmmm… This writing thing is hard. Anyway: “—although the status quo for people like them at the time wasn’t the best. However, it was a dire emergency. The father was determined to revitalize his child. “The father trekked wearily through the path when suddenly he saw strange, contorted shapes spurting from the ground. ZOMBIES!!!!! AH!!!!! IT’S A HORRIBLE PANDEMIC!!!!” Agh, backspace backspace backspace… why did I write that? This is such an awful anachronism. It’s like some intangible bad-writing-ideas ghost is trying to haunt me. Maybe those five cans of Red Bull are getting to my head. Alright, moving
on… “ZOMBIES!!!!! AH!!!!! IT’S A HORRIBLE PANDEMIC!!!! The father gingerly crept closer to the grotesque shapes, speculating about what sort of strange beings these might be. Perhaps it’s a bored ghoul, or a vampire with a voracious appetite… or a legendary protector of this land, gifted with immortality, he thought. Yet, he had to trudge on, for the healer-witch was his last hope of saving his precious daughter.” Okay, I think now is a good time to pause. I wonder what's on TV. Oooooooooh, what should I have for lunch? I should commemorate my hard work with some KFC.
Thirty minutes later . . . “He and his daughter passed safely through the contortions and he breathed a sigh of relief. So he proceeded to travel through the forest. “CRACK. “A. He attributed the cause to a beaver, or perhaps a large mouse, but even then he was not convinced. Suddenly he heard a monstrous voice —”
ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR
YOUR COMPUTER MUST BE CHARGED! 1% BATTERY.
SHUTTING DOWN NOW….. ALL UNSAVED DATA WILL NOW BE DELETED.
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! MY STORYYYYYY!!!! WAIT—”
“In the sunny village of Alexandria, there lived a happy family of four. The wife and husband had a strong, tenacious bond and had pledged a never-ending fidelity to each other. They deeply loved each other and their children and vowed to give them a wonderful childhood.” “One unfortunate day, the youngest fell dangerously ill. The mother and father were distraught and knew the only way to save the child was to visit a healer-witch rumored to be living in the woods. The father took the youngest while the mother and the elder sister stayed at home, fervently praying for their safe return. The brave father hiked along a rough mount path carrying his daughter with as many provisions as they could afford to pack, although the status quo for people like them—” …show more content…
Oh… my… god.
What the heck is the cat doing in here? He's scratching all of my stuff. “Get out, you no-good vermin, with your… infinitesimal brain of a deranged worm.” Gah, look at the time. I should get back to work. Oh, and now the window is open. Ughhh. Why does this stuff happen to me? “C’mon, Gerald, pull yourself together,” I murmur to myself. Okay, what's next? Hmmm… This writing thing is hard. Anyway: “—although the status quo for people like them at the time wasn’t the best. However, it was a dire emergency. The father was determined to revitalize his child. “The father trekked wearily through the path when suddenly he saw strange, contorted shapes spurting from the ground. ZOMBIES!!!!! AH!!!!! IT’S A HORRIBLE PANDEMIC!!!!” Agh, backspace backspace backspace… why did I write that? This is such an awful anachronism. It’s like some intangible bad-writing-ideas ghost is trying to haunt me. Maybe those five cans of Red Bull are getting to my head. Alright, moving
on… “ZOMBIES!!!!! AH!!!!! IT’S A HORRIBLE PANDEMIC!!!! The father gingerly crept closer to the grotesque shapes, speculating about what sort of strange beings these might be. Perhaps it’s a bored ghoul, or a vampire with a voracious appetite… or a legendary protector of this land, gifted with immortality, he thought. Yet, he had to trudge on, for the healer-witch was his last hope of saving his precious daughter.” Okay, I think now is a good time to pause. I wonder what's on TV. Oooooooooh, what should I have for lunch? I should commemorate my hard work with some KFC.
Thirty minutes later . . . “He and his daughter passed safely through the contortions and he breathed a sigh of relief. So he proceeded to travel through the forest. “CRACK. “A. He attributed the cause to a beaver, or perhaps a large mouse, but even then he was not convinced. Suddenly he heard a monstrous voice —”
ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR
YOUR COMPUTER MUST BE CHARGED! 1% BATTERY.
SHUTTING DOWN NOW….. ALL UNSAVED DATA WILL NOW BE DELETED.
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! MY STORYYYYYY!!!! WAIT—”