Summary Of Nic Sheff's Memoir 'Tweak'

September 22, 2008 Tweak (Growing up on Methamphetamines) Nic Sheff
D. Williams

In Nic Sheff's appalling memoir, "Tweak", he takes you through his many attempts at recovery, and the mental and physical hardships he endured. The first time he got drunk was at age 11, and in the years that followed his life swirled out of control as his addiction to methamphetamines (along with cocaine and heroin) became more demanding. What I thought really differentiated his memoir from others about addiction was the courage he had to try again, after so many failed attempts at getting sober. From prostituting himself to stealing from the people he loved, Nic not only had to fight the rest of the world, but his own demons as well. Throughout Nic's account of the story, the theme was really being emphasized. Without the plot, his experiences wouldn't having taken suck vivid shape. Doing the right thing is always the hardest, but Nic had the courage to do the right thing. He had the courage to stop hiding behind something, (the meth) and come forward and be honest with not only his family, but himself as well. After five
different rehabs, and so many relapses, he decided he needed to get sober if we wanted to live. He went to rehab once again, for the fifth time. He was more courageous than most, who would have probably stoped trying at the embarrassment of so many rehabs and relapses. To get to the top, he had to hit rock bottom. Nic's wanting to be to re-connected with his family was one of the main reasons he wanted to get clean. After so many let downs, his family refused to make contact with him, unless it was to get help. With all the embarrassing and low things he did to them to get closer to the drugs, it surprised me that even though they refused to talk to him, he persisted with trying to regain their once strong relationship and trust. I know that personally, I don't know if I would of had the courage to go to them and say, You know what, I know I screwed up, but the only thing we can do now is move on, and you can either accept me and support me, or not. At first Nic didn't either, but he had to make a decision; either lose his family and himself, or try again. In saying that Nic's account of the story really emphasized the plot, the way he accounted it also did.
Nic's voice was raw, brutally honest, graphic, and somewhat disturbing. It definitely wouldn't have been the same, or have the same meaning, had he told the story being sugar-coated and fake. The realistic way in which he told it made it all the more real. He took you back to the past a lot, instead of merely re-telling the events as they occurred. "It was like being in a car with the gas pedal slammed to the floor and nothing to do but hold on, and pretend to have some semblance of control. But control was something I'd lost a long time ago." That was one of my favourite quotes from the novel, because his metaphor captures exactly how his addiction had taken control over him. But in the end, he had the courage to overcome his addiction. He never gave
up. The Nic that we see at the beginning of the novel and the Nic that we see at the end are two clearly different people; he started out a coward, hiding behind the substances. But in the end, he was simply himself. He had the courage and self discipline to regain the life he so obviously missed, and present himself for who he really was. “It’s okay to be really open and honest, you don’t have to hide who you are or the problems that you’re having.” He finally had the courage to embrace himself, and love himself for who he was. Humiliating himself never stopped him from trying to get clean. He may have hesitated at first, but he knew what he had to do to regain control, and regain the relationships that he'd lost. His courage helped him shut out the life he couldn't before.

Before writing this essay, I watched an interview of Nic and David Sheff, his father, talking about the novel on YouTube. “http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m77f1I_AexU”