The CIA: A Short Story

The wind blew in my face, carrying off the tears that rolled down my cheeks. The fear of losing a loved one had brought me down to my knees. I was helpless; I had lost my word on protection. I couldn’t protect myself, how could I protect the one I loved. Maybe that’s just a sacrifice you need to make when you join the CIA. As a high post agent, I had made enemies after I caught a drug mafia leader, Fawad Asdar and had stopped one of his major cartel transactions with an international drug dealer. I wasn’t sure how many people were aware I had taken Fawad Asdar in my custody, all I was told that I had to go off the grid for a while. There was recently a failed assassination attempt on my life. I was shot near my heart. My partner Ali Safdar had heard rumor about my life being in danger and he kept a close eye on me. He saved me just in time to let the bullet miss my heart by an inch. Surgeries, operations went on, until I finally was able to stand up on my feet again.
Today I stand on a beach walking alone on the wet sand realizing how far I was from home, how far I was from my love.
A compromise I had to make where I couldn’t allow anyone to be near me. My loved ones are my weakness. I can’t afford losing another. Never after my mother, whose death I blame myself for. She did because I was too busy saving and fighting for my country, that when the enemies reached my home, pulling a trigger on her head to leave me a message to back off, I wasn’t there to save her, to save the one who saved me, protected me, loved me for who I was. When I got home, there she lie dead, on the cold floor, her blood drizzling out, her eyes wide open; the shock of that moment, made me paranoid for the rest of my life. It was then I decided I couldn’t lose someone at my expense. Getting close to people, meant I was vulnerable, and I wasn’t making that mistake again. But I
slipped. Daniel and I met 2 years back, he was an FBI agent. We were on a case together. When we fell in love, we weren’t aware but two years later, we stand at two different corners of the world, because I was too afraid to lose him, I feared that I would lose him like I lost my mother. After he was kidnapped by Fawad’s brother, he got shot in his ribs, went through a couple of surgeries, was well again, but in that moment I realized, I could have lost him, so I forced myself to never see him again.