The Effects of Dysfunctional Families
Self-destruction of the Mind
Many children grow up in dysfunctional families and in order to know what a dysfunctional family is, we have to understand how it operates. No family is perfect and disagreements, bickering and yelling are normal. But the word we are looking for here is “balance”. This is exactly what dysfunctional families’ lack, whether parents are controlling, deficient, alcoholic or abusive, they have an adverse, long term effect on the children even long after they have grown up and left home. Many of these adults from dysfunctional families often feel inadequate and incomplete. They have difficulty with intimate relationships and often develop compulsive behaviors and addictions, being self-destructive in their own mind.
Let us consider a family that is too controlling, where parents are over dominating and do not allow their children simple fun and deny them of their independence. These parents continue to make decisions and control their children even at an age where it is unnecessary. So growing up and learning to be independent can be difficult, a feeling of anger and resentment may present itself. Transition into adulthood poses some struggle to these adults who often feel unsure of themselves and guilty because they feel as though they are disobeying their parents by making their own decisions. Let us take a look at the other extreme where parents are deficient in their roles and are not present in the rearing of their children. These parents leave their children to often fend for themselves which forces them to grow up too fast. Taking on adult responsibilities to make up for the parental inadequacy, these kids ignore their feelings and often grow up not knowing how to show emotion. They find it difficult to form and maintain intimate relationships, they fear getting close to others for fear of abandonment. They often develop a sense of helplessness and blame themselves for the absence of their parents.
Whether there is too much
Many children grow up in dysfunctional families and in order to know what a dysfunctional family is, we have to understand how it operates. No family is perfect and disagreements, bickering and yelling are normal. But the word we are looking for here is “balance”. This is exactly what dysfunctional families’ lack, whether parents are controlling, deficient, alcoholic or abusive, they have an adverse, long term effect on the children even long after they have grown up and left home. Many of these adults from dysfunctional families often feel inadequate and incomplete. They have difficulty with intimate relationships and often develop compulsive behaviors and addictions, being self-destructive in their own mind.
Let us consider a family that is too controlling, where parents are over dominating and do not allow their children simple fun and deny them of their independence. These parents continue to make decisions and control their children even at an age where it is unnecessary. So growing up and learning to be independent can be difficult, a feeling of anger and resentment may present itself. Transition into adulthood poses some struggle to these adults who often feel unsure of themselves and guilty because they feel as though they are disobeying their parents by making their own decisions. Let us take a look at the other extreme where parents are deficient in their roles and are not present in the rearing of their children. These parents leave their children to often fend for themselves which forces them to grow up too fast. Taking on adult responsibilities to make up for the parental inadequacy, these kids ignore their feelings and often grow up not knowing how to show emotion. They find it difficult to form and maintain intimate relationships, they fear getting close to others for fear of abandonment. They often develop a sense of helplessness and blame themselves for the absence of their parents.
Whether there is too much
References: Bentont, S. (1993). www.k-state.edu. Retrieved from http://www.k-state.edu/counseling/topics/relationships/dysfunc.html Bohli, E. (2012). Symptoms of adults from dysfunctional families. Retrieved from http://www.erikbohlin.net/Handouts/Coming_from_dysfunction.pdf