& Five Ways To Resolve Conflict”
Jennifer L. Twigger
Liberty University Online
Abstract
Longitudinal studies on the early years of marriage report that marital satisfaction declines and conflict increases within the first 6 years of marriage, with the greatest drop occurring in the first 2 years. (Huston & Houts, 2001) While commitment and communication are major things that contribute to this decline; it is not everything. Research has found another critical variable in the course of marital satisfaction is the occurrence of conflict. Conflict is inevitable in any intimate relationship. How it affects satisfaction depends on the extent to which couples engage in conflict or withdraw from it. There are usually short-term negative effects to engaging in conflict, but there are also long-term positive effects. If conflict is not openly addressed, but avoided, many issues can be left unresolved. This will further, fuel feelings of resentment and anger. Another major issue is when spouses bring unresolved conflict into their marriage from the past, there is reported a low marital satisfaction. Often, these couples lack the motivation and necessary skill to engage in the kinds of relationship maintenance behaviors that cultivate high levels of contentment. For example, these couples often struggle with accommodating the other during conflict, managing jealousy, and being willing to sacrifice. Thus, unresolved conflict has a major impact on the longevity of a marriage.
According to the December 2009 statistics from the US Census Bureau, there are about 2.2 million married people in the United States (Wood, L, 2010). That number is not small; it shows how important marriage is in our society. God designed the marriage to be an expression of deep and pleasurable intimacy revealing the unity that exists within; thus, an extension of God Himself. Although, it’s God’s
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