Mrs. Diamond
ENG4U
9th October 2012
The Wars – Timothy Findley
Family often has a great influence on the decisions of our lives. Parents often are the greatest external influences that we consider. Similarly in The Wars, Timothy Findley’s main character – Robert Ross’ parents influence his actions throughout the book. Mrs. Ross is portrayed as an adamant woman who is not very expressive of her love towards her children (especially Robert) because of societal norms but a gradual change is seen as the book progresses; On the other hand, Mr. Ross has always been an affectionate man towards his children and remains a constant character throughout the book.
Mrs. Ross is Robert's mother who has issues with closeness to people that she truly loves in the novel of Timothy Findley's The Wars. To best understand Robert's relationship with his mother Mrs. Ross, their relationship should be seen from the perspective of Mrs. Ross. She did not show any affection towards Robert when Rowena died even though she knew how Robert felt whereas Mr. Ross was concerned about Robert. Mrs. Ross' decision to burden Robert with this inhuman act, and his failure to do so lead to the most revealing monologue relevant to their relationship: “You think that Rowena belonged to you. Well I’m here to tell you, Robert, no one belongs to anyone…….. I can’t keep anyone alive. Not anymore.” (Page 28). . Robert's relationship with his mother prior to the death of his sister Rowena seems normal in the sense that Mrs. Ross shows her motherly concern for Robert when needed. After the death of Robert's sister Rowena, the Ross family seems to be broken. Family members question whose fault it was that she fell and who should ultimately be held responsible. Robert had been closest to Rowena, and for this reason Mrs. Ross decided that he was to be the one who would take responsibility of killing her rabbits. Mrs. Ross never encouraged Robert to do what he wanted as a child. “He will die, they said. Twenty-six times on top of supper! Surely he is mad!” (Findley 47). The relationship between Mrs. Ross and Robert is confusing because the anger directed at Robert is not hatred but love. She cares so much about him that she cannot bear the thought of him leaving her, so she directs anger at him. She also cannot deal with the fact that there is a chance that Robert will die before she does. She starts taking long walks to clear her mind. Robert was also taking long walks at the same time when he starts his training. The walks may have helped Robert clear his mind but it did not have the same effect for Mrs. Ross. Instead she starts drinking more and hides herself from public. The only thing that keeps Mrs. Ross from becoming totally mad is Robert’s daily letters that she keeps re-reading. Seeing Mrs. Ross in on the brink of insanity, Mr. Ross gives his wife one more chance to say goodbye in Montreal. The chance is missed when she chooses to get drunk instead of saying farewell to her son:
“When Mister Ross came in and said it was time to go ...... she watched her boy depart” (Findley 73). At the end Mrs. Ross finally lets herself go and she admits that she actually cares for Robert. Her life becomes more depressing as the war goes by. The whole point of her life is to see her son survive and come back. The news of Ross being missing sends Mrs. Ross into hysteria. The shock causes her to lose her sight and her voice becomes emotionless. It seems like she is tired of seeing the world. Mrs. Ross can no longer face elements of life without her son and this concludes their relationship.