Translation Study of Poetry translated from Chinese to English

A Comparative Study of English Translations of Tu Fu’s “Chūn Wàng”

As Francis K. H. So says, “[w]hether or not a student of Chinese literature likes pathetic style, he has to know Tu Fu, whose seven-syllable verse perhaps reaches the acme of its kind in the golden age of poetry,” 1 translations of Tu Fu’s poetry could be more precise than others due to its popularity. Therefore, his five-character eight-line regulated verse “Chūn Wàng” would be discussed in the essay. There are four different titles in the five translations collected. Yip Wai-Lim and Minford have the same title: Spring Scene. The others are “Looking at the Springtime”(Hammett), “Spring View”(Snyder), and “Spring Prospect”(Herdan). Herdan misunderstands the meaning of 望 in the title and translates it into “prospect” which gives reader a positive feeling more or less related to “hope.” Hammett is the only that conveys the idea of 望, which means to look at. The others only catch the concept of what Tu is looking at in spring. There are three couplets from line one to line six in the poem. According to Wikipedia, couplets in Chinese poetry should follow the rules below:
1. Both lines must have the same number of Chinese characters.
2. The lexical category of each character must be the same as its corresponding character.
3. The tone pattern of one line must be the inverse of the other. This generally means if one character is of the a level (平) tone, its corresponding character in the other line must be of an oblique (仄) tone, and vice versa.
4. The last character of the first line should be of an oblique tone, which forces the last character of the second line to be of a level tone.
5. The meaning of the two lines need to be related, with each pair of corresponding characters having related meanings too.2
It is almost impossible to keep the form of couplets without missing the literal meaning of the poem. Thus, in these five translations, none of them keeps the Chinese couplet form. Nevertheless, Hammett creates his own form to make the poem more poetic by using rhymed stanzas and regulated syllables. Take the translation of first two lines for example, In fallen States hills and streams are found, Cities have Spring, grass and leaves abound;
Hammett makes the first two lines of the poem into one stanza and creates its own rhymes by using the words “found” and “abound.” In Tu’s poem, 在 does not refer to being “found.” According to Yip Wai-Lim, 在 literally means “exist” or “remain.” 3However, by slightly changing the meaning of the words, Hammett recreates the beauty of the structure of the poem. On the other hand, the first couplets of the poem should be read as:
1. XX XXX
2. XX XXX
Therefore, four ways of translation could be found in the text. The first way is to keep one line as a sentence by adding a comma and a conjunction like Minford and Snyder: The state may fall, but the hills and streams remain. It is spring in the city: grass and leaves grow thick. (Minford)

The nation is ruined, but mountains and rivers remain. This spring the city is deep in weeds and brush. (Snyder)
The second way is to make the lines into run-on sentences as Hammett does. The third way is a combination of the two above. Take Herdan’s translation for example, The kingdom is ruined – only hills and streams are there as before. In the city it is spring; grass and foliage grow dense.
Herdan not only separates the sentence as it should be read in Chinese, but he also add punctuations to the poem, which makes it more readable to English readers. The last, and the most interesting one, is Yip Wai-Lin’s translation. All ruins, the empire; mountains and rivers in view. To the city, spring: grass and trees so thick.
Yip obviously handles it with a more Chinese way. In other words, he does not add conjunction to explain the connection between ruined empire and the remains. He simply gives reader all of the images that Tu delivers without extra explanation. It could be hard for English readers to understand at first. That is the reason why other translations such as Minford and Snyder put “but” in the first line, but put “:” or a space in second line, because Chinese poem does not require a conjunction to express the relation. However, using conjunction to help translate the first two lines, one thing the translator would notice is that the two lines demand different conjunctions. The idea of the first line would be: XX “but” XXX, while the second line is XX “and” XXX. Thus, most translations use “but” for the first line, but choose a colon instead of “and” for the second line. In my view, using a colon is better than an “and,” because a colon provides an idea which is similar to juxtaposition, though it is not quite the same; it gives the reader more space to imagine the connection. For line three and four, 花濺淚and 鳥驚心are used to convey human emotions, which means during the certain period of time, flowers and birds could give the poet a certain kind of feeling or have the poet react in a certain way. Unfortunately, all the texts, except Yip Wai-Lim’s, mistranslate it as flowers and birds would have the certain behavior. For example, Snyder translates the two lines into: Touched by the times even flowers weep tears, Fearing leaving the birds tangled hearts. while Yip Wai-Lin translates them as: The times strike. Before flowers, tears break loose. Separation cuts. Birds startle our hearts. In line five and six, Tu uses “imaginary numbers” 三 and 萬 to show the length of the war and how people were worried about their family. Thus, 烽火 and 家書 represent the war and family. All of the translations keep these two images original, because it is easy to see the connection between 烽火 and war, and 家書and family. However, though “three months” is kept in all the texts, there are three different translations for “萬” Herdan, Hammett, and Snyder translate it as “ten thousand,” which is the literal meaning of the original. However, “imaginary numbers” are commonly used in Chinese poetry; therefore, the translation could vary. For example, Yip Wai-Lim also uses an imaginary number: thousands, to deliver the idea of an amount of number. On the contrary, Minford chooses not to use any number; instead, he translates the line into: “A letter from home would be worth a fortune,” which I consider the best. For the last two lines, the only lines that are not couplets, Tu delivers the idea of how terribly worried a person could be about wars. First, it is hard to explain簪 to English readers. Thus, most texts use “hairpin” or simply “pin” for簪. Herdan even gives a footnote that “the Chinese gentleman of Tang times wore his hair in a knot on top of the head.”4 Hammett, in order to make it rhyme with “mishap,” changes the word into “cap.” Though it is easier for English reader to understand, it could also mislead the reader since not fitting its cap does not has the strong image as簪 has to express how worried the poet was. The reason why I choose this poem is not only because of Tu Fu, but also because this is a poem about war. We have learned that Chinese literature, compared with Western literature, tends to reduce war scenes as much as it could. Hence, in the poem, there is no words expressing war scenes, but words delivering the consequence that war brings and how terrifying and worrying a war could be. In my view, Yip Wai-Lim’s and Hammett’s translations are the best with different styles. Yip keeps the concept of Chinese poetry which does not indicate the emotion or feeling directly. On the other hand, Hammett’s translation is more like a recreation of Chun Wang. He makes the poem easy for English readers, and also provides another poetry structure through which readers could appreciate Chinese poetry couplets and the beauty of Chinese poetry style.

Spring Scene
All ruins, the empire; mountains and rivers in view.
To the city, spring: grass and trees so thick.
The times strike. Before flowers, tears break loose.
Separation cuts. Birds startle our heart.
Beacon fires continued for three months on end.
A letter from home is worth thousands of gold pieces.
White hair, scratched, becomes thinner and thinner,
So thin it can hardly hold a pin.
Yip, Wai-Lim
Spring View
The nation is ruined, but mountains and rivers remain.
This spring the city is deep in weeds and brush.
Touched by the times even flowers weep tears,
Fearing leaving the birds tangled hearts.
Watch-tower fires have been burning for three months
To get a note from home would cost ten thousand gold.
Scratching my white hair thinner
Seething hopes all in a trembling hairpin.
Gary Snyder

Spring Prospect
The kingdom is ruined – only hills and streams are there as before.
In the city it is spring; grass and foliage grow dense.
Grieving for the times, flowers splash their tears;
Shocked by the partings, birds seem terrified!
For three months on end beacon fires flared.
Letters from home rated ten thousand gold pieces.
When I scratched my white head, I find the hair so scanty,
There will soon be hardly enough to hold the hairpin.
Innes Herdan
Spring Scene
The state may fall, but the hills and streams remain.
It is spring in the city: grass and leaves grow thick.
The flowers shed tears of grief for the troubled times, and the birds seen startled, as if with the anguish of separation.
For three months continuously the beacon-fires have been burning.
A letter from home would be worth a fortune.
My white hair is getting so scanty from worried scratching that soon there won’t be enough to stick my hatpin in!
Minford & Lau
Looking at the Springtime In fallen States hills and streams are found, Cities have Spring, grass and leaves abound; Though at such times flowers might drop tears, Parting from mates, birds have hidden fears: The beacon fires have now linked three months, Making home new worth ten thousand coins; An old grey head scratched at each mishap Has dwindling hair, does not fit its cap!
Patsy Price Hammett

Work Cited

Yip, Wai-Lim. “Spring Scene.” Chinese Poetry: An Anthology of Major Modes and Genres. Durham and London. 1997: 191

Eliot Weinberger edit. William Carlos Williams, Ezra Pound, Kenneth Rexroth, Gary Snyder, David Hinton translation. “Spring View.” The New Directions Anthology of Classical Chinese Poetry. A New Directions Book: 100

Innes Herdan. “Spring Prospect.” The Three Hundred Tang Poems. The Far East Book. 1973: 236-237

Minford&Lau. “Spring Scene” Classical Chinese Literature: Volume I: From Antiquity to the Tang Dynasty. 772-774

Patsy Price Hammett. “Looking at the Springtime” The Appeal of the Poetry of Li Po and Tu Fu. Taipei 1980: 171-177

Cited: Yip, Wai-Lim. “Spring Scene.” Chinese Poetry: An Anthology of Major Modes and Genres. Durham and London. 1997: 191 Eliot Weinberger edit. William Carlos Williams, Ezra Pound, Kenneth Rexroth, Gary Snyder, David Hinton translation. “Spring View.” The New Directions Anthology of Classical Chinese Poetry. A New Directions Book: 100 Innes Herdan. “Spring Prospect.” The Three Hundred Tang Poems. The Far East Book. 1973: 236-237 Minford&Lau. “Spring Scene” Classical Chinese Literature: Volume I: From Antiquity to the Tang Dynasty. 772-774 Patsy Price Hammett. “Looking at the Springtime” The Appeal of the Poetry of Li Po and Tu Fu. Taipei 1980: 171-177