Writing and Racial Profiling
Racial Profiling
Developed by Kim Flachmann
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
GRADE 12
Reading Selection for this Module
Herbert, Bob. “Jim Crow Policing.” New York Times 2 Feb. 2010, late ed.: A27. Print.
Module Description
This module has been designed to provoke students to take a stand on the controversial topic of racial profiling. The issues surrounding this topic are complex and entangled in related subjects to the extent that a change in one area might dramatically affect other claims in an argument. The module will help students discover the academic moves Bob Herbert makes in his professional essay so that they can use similar strategies in their own essays. As students work through the activities in each section of this module, they will be prompted to articulate what they have discovered so they understand metacognitively how to develop an argument by deconstructing an article that demonstrates the effective use of all three persuasive appeals for a single purpose.
Module Background
This module purposely focuses on a single essay, rather than on multiple essays on this issue, to provoke students to take a stand on this topic and produce their own claims for their final writing assignment. Until recently, Bob Herbert, the author of the essay in this module, was an Op-Ed columnist for the New York Times. He has also been a national correspondent for NBC and a reporter on the Today Show and NBC Nightly News. He presents his strong opinions on the subject of racial profiling and its negative effects on our culture, and students are asked to analyze and respond to his main claims in this essay. The module takes about two to three weeks to complete, depending on the background knowledge of the students.
Module Objectives
In addition to the focus on Common Core State Standards, the module targets the skill areas listed below. Students will be able to
•• Read and respond to an essay rhetorically
•• Analyze an argument
•• Interpret and integrate information from multiple sources
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
•• Compare and contrast diverse perspectives on an issue
•• Analyze contexts rhetorically
•• Write a text-based academic essay
Note: The activities for students provided in the Student Version for this module are copied here in the Teacher Version for your convenience. The shaded areas include the actual activities the students will see. The use of italics in the shaded areas generally indicates possible student responses and may be interspersed with notes to the teacher that are not shaded. If there are notes to the teacher within the shaded areas, they are indicated by italics and parentheses.
Reading Rhetorically
Prereading
The strategies in this section of the
ERWC are designed to prepare students in advance of reading increasingly complex and sophisticated text. These brief, introductory activities will prepare students to learn the content of the
CCSS for ELA/Literacy in the sections of the template that follow.
Getting Ready to Read
As you approach the reading for this module, engage your students in
Bob Herbert’s “Jim Crow Policing” by having them complete Activity 1.
This activity will help motivate your students to read and will promote an inquiring approach to reading and writing by helping them make connections between their personal worlds and the world of the text. It will also encourage them to activate their prior knowledge and experience related to the issues addressed in the text. Read and discuss the activity with your students. Then have them write down their thoughts in a quickwrite to focus their attention and help them discover relationships among old and new ideas. Activity 1: Getting Ready to Read
The following article, “Jim Crow Policing” by Bob Herbert, was first published in the New York Times on February 2, 2010. It tries to persuade its readers that law-enforcement agents should not take any action on the basis of race alone. It uses a combination of logic and emotion to achieve its purpose. Have you ever been stopped by the police because of your appearance? If you have, what was your reaction? If you haven’t, what do you think your reaction would be? Why do you think you would react this way?
Quickwrite: What do you know about racial profiling? What do you think about it? Write for five minutes. Then discuss your response with a partner.
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CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
At this point, introduce your students to Rhetorical Grammar for Expository
Reading and Writing as appropriate for their needs. Begin instruction for
Activity 1 before moving to Exploring Key Concepts in the module. This activity will prepare students for the rhetorical grammar instruction that will follow. Please save the guided compositions that your students write for the
Editing Your Guided Composition Activity 7.
The strategies in this section of the
ERWC are designed to prepare students in advance of reading increasingly complex and sophisticated text. These brief, introductory activities will prepare students to learn the content of the
CCSS for ELA/Literacy in the sections of the template that follow.
Exploring Key Concepts
Exploring key concepts provides an entry point for students into the conversation about the issues raised in the reading selection in this module.
These concepts then provide a frame for other activities that build students’ knowledge and language on this and related topics. The key concepts embedded in this reading will be revisited during the module through additional activities, discussions, and writing prompts. At this point, assign
Activity 2 to begin the process of building a conceptual understanding of the terms and ideas students are about to encounter.
Activity 2: Exploring Key Concepts
Understanding key concepts in a reading selection is essential to good comprehension, so that is where we are going to start the reading process.
Complete the following activities before moving on.
Jim Crow Policing
Look up “Jim Crow” on the Internet.
• What does the term have to do with race?
• Is the reference positive or negative?
• What is its origin?
• What do you think this reference might have to do with police activities?
Now go to the PBS page called “The Rise and Fall of Jim Crow,” and read four of the Jim Crow stories. Be prepared to retell one of them to the class.
Other Key Concepts
Below are some additional important concepts from Herbert’s essay. Write down your personal associations with these terms. Then complete the activity that follows.
• race
• prejudice
• ethnic
• discrimination
• profiling
• stereotyping
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
RG Rhetorical Grammar for Expository Reading and Writing
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Complete a “cubing” activity for four of the words listed above. For this exercise, fill in all the squares below for each of the words you choose.
Describe it:
Compare it:
What are its colors, shapes, sizes, smells, tastes, sounds?
Associate it:
What is it similar to?
What does it make you think of?
Apply it:
How is it made?
Argue for it or against it:
Analyze it:
What can you do with it?
How can it be used?
Here is an example of the cubing activity for the word “prejudice”:
Describe it:
Compare it:
A behavior that is ugly, dark, loathsome, mean-spirited, and disrespectful of others; motivated by a sense of superiority
Prejudice is like an illness. It starts out with a cough or a sneeze and escalates into a fever or disease when untreated. It spreads to others through words and violence and, like a disease, can do serious damage to others. Analyze it:
Associate it:
I read about how they ransacked his store, wrote on his walls, and pushed him down on the ground.
When asked what they wanted, they shrugged to say they wanted him gone—him and his kind. I remember thinking I was his kind too—would they come after me?
Apply it:
Made through time, usually handed down in families or communities, delivered with hateful words and ignorant eyes
Used for relief of insecurity or ignorance, used for cruelty or punishment; often used for power
I argue against prejudice, for what good does it do to foster hate and ignorance? How can it move a society to good deeds and kindness when its very spirit is mean and harmful? Reading –
Informational Text
5a. Analyze the use of text features (e.g., graphics, headers, captions)… 4
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Argue for it or against it:
Surveying the Text
Surveying the text will give students an overview of what the essay is about and how it is constructed. It will help them create a framework within which they can make predictions and form questions to guide their reading. The questions in Activity 3 will guide students’ surveys.
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Surveying your reading material (no matter what its length) will give you an overview of what it is about and how it is put together. To learn how to survey an essay, answer the following questions.
1. Who is the author of this essay?
Bob Herbert
2. When and where was this essay published?
The New York Times, Feb. 2, 2010
3. What proper nouns do you notice in this essay?
Jim Crow, New York City Police, Mayor Michael Bloomberg, Police Commissioner
Ray Kelly, Center for Constitutional Rights, Lalit Carson, Deon Dennis, Harlem
4. What do you think the essay will discuss?
Is racial profiling fair to everyone?
The strategies in this section of the
ERWC are designed to prepare students in advance of reading increasingly complex and sophisticated texts. These brief, introductory activities will prepare students to learn the content of the
CCSS for ELA/Literacy in the sections of the template that follow.
Making Predictions and Asking Questions
Asking students to make predictions is one way to ensure that they will read actively instead of passively. Making predictions gives reading purpose and focus. As students complete Activity 4, be sure to ask them to explain how they formed their thoughts and opinions, having them give evidence from the text whenever possible.
Activity 4: Making Predictions and Asking Questions
Making predictions about your reading will help you read actively rather than passively. Active reading promotes learning. Your answers to the following questions will guide you through the process.
1. What do you think this essay is going to be about?
2. What do you think is the purpose of this essay?
3. Who do you think is the intended audience for this piece? What brings you to this conclusion?
4. What do you think the writer wants the reader to do or believe?
5. On the basis of the title and other features of the selection, what information or ideas might this essay present?
6. Do you think the writer will be negative or positive in relation to the topic?
How did you come to this conclusion?
7. What argument about the topic might the article present? What makes you think so?
8. Turn the title into a question (or questions) for you to answer after you have read the essay.
(The answers to these questions will vary according to the level of detail students noticed when they surveyed the text.)
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Activity 3: Surveying the Text
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Depending on students’ responses to the questions so far, you might also create an “Anticipation Guide” that leads them through their first reading.
They should search for the answers to these questions as they read the essay for the first time.
Introduction
•• In the introduction, how does Herbert establish the significance of racial profiling? He connects racial profiling with “humiliation” and “mistreatment.”
Body
•• Why does the author start with statistics in paragraph 2? How do they start to make the essay’s point?
The statistics about stopping give a quick overview of the breadth of the problem.
•• What point is Herbert making when he breaks the data down by race?
He is showing that the problem affects minorities more than whites.
•• Why does the author talk about the reasons New York police stop people?
What does that have to do with his main argument?
Herbert wants to represent the thinking of the New York police. This is law enforcement’s justification for racial profiling.
•• What is the main point of this essay? What examples does Herbert cite to make his point?
Herbert’s main point is that racial profiling is unethical and degrading and it must be stopped.
•• What are the consequences of racial profiling?
It makes innocent citizens victims and affects our right to be in public places.
Language
4. Determine or clarify the meaning of unknown and multiplemeaning words and phrases based on grades 11-12 reading and content, choosing flexibly from a range of strategies.
a. Use context (e.g., the overall meaning of a sentence, paragraph, or text; a word’s position or function in a sentence) as a clue to the meaning of a word or phrase. b. Identify and correctly use patterns of word changes that indicate different meanings or parts of speech
(e.g., conceive,
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Understanding Key Vocabulary
Choosing key words and then reinforcing them throughout the reading process is an important activity for students at all levels of proficiency. The words in Activity 5 are important for students to understand as they read so the definitions are supplied for them.
Activity 5: Understanding Key Vocabulary
The following vocabulary words are important to your understanding of this essay, so the definitions are provided for you:
• abomination (par. 1): an object that is intensely disliked
• contraband (par. 3): illegal imports
• despicable (par. 5): horrible
• degrading (par. 8): humiliating
• unconstitutional (par. 13): illegal
• specious (par. 15): false
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Explain how each of these words is related to one of the key concepts introduced earlier in “Exploring Key Concepts.”
By having students explain the relationship of these words to those on the previous list, you will help them gain a better understanding of the new words and provide practice in making predictions about what they are about to read.
RG Rhetorical Grammar for Expository Reading and Writing
At this point, begin rhetorical grammar instruction for Activities 2-5. Integrate the activities across the Reading, Postreading, and Connecting Reading to
Writing portions of the module, as appropriate for your students’ needs.
Participating in these activities will help prepare them to write their own assignments. Reading
Reading –
Informational Text
Reading for Understanding
1. Cite strong and thorough textual evidence to support analysis of what the text says explicitly as well as inferences drawn from the text, including determining where the text leaves matters uncertain.
The first reading of an essay is intended to help students understand the text and confirm their predictions. This is sometimes called reading “with the grain” or “playing the believing game.”
For Activity 6, ask students to do a form of “think aloud,” with each student reading a different paragraph. Student responses will vary according to their thought processes and prior knowledge. Just make sure your students talk freely and openly about their thoughts as they read the text.
Activity 6: Reading for Understanding
We all process reading material differently. No one way is better than another.
To demonstrate the variety of approaches to this essay, read it aloud, and talk about your responses to the following questions:
1. Which of your predictions turned out to be true?
2. What surprised you?
3. Are you persuaded by the text?
4. If a prediction was inaccurate, what in the text misled you?
5. Can you answer the question you created from the title?
6. What in the essay is confusing to you?
(Student responses will vary)
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
conception, conceivable). Apply knowledge of Greek, Latin, and Anglo-Saxon roots and affixes to draw inferences concerning the meaning of scientific and mathematical terminology.
6. Acquire and use accurately general academic and domain-specific words and phrases, sufficient for reading, writing, speaking, and listening at the college and career readiness level; demonstrate independence in gathering vocabulary knowledge when considering a word or phrase important to comprehension or expression. MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
During this reading, your students should also pay attention to how this writer develops his argument. Understanding how he writes this persuasive essay will equip them to write their own persuasive essays later.
In addition to revisiting their predictions, students can use other strategies to increase their understanding of the text during the first reading. Depending on the level of scaffolding students need, you may wish to encourage them to mark the text with their initial reactions.
Prerequisite Grade 8
Standard: Reading –
Informational Text
5. Analyze in detail the structure of a specific paragraph in a text, including the role of particular sentences in developing and refining a key concept.
Grades 11-12
Reading –
Informational Text
5. Analyze and evaluate the effectiveness of the structure an author uses in his or her exposition or argument, including whether the structure makes points clear, convincing, and engaging.
Speaking & Listening
1. Initiate and participate effectively in a range of collaborative discussions
(one-on- one, in groups, and teacherled) with diverse partners on grades
11–12 topics, texts, and issues, building on others’ ideas and expressing their own clearly and persuasively.
a. Come to discussions prepared, having read and researched material under study; explicitly draw on that preparation by referring to evidence from texts and other research on the topic or issue to stimulate a thoughtful, well-reasoned exchange of ideas. 8
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Considering the Structure of the Text
The questions in Activity 7 require students to map out or graphically represent different aspects of the text so they can gain a clearer understanding of the writer’s approach to the essay’s content. The first two activities will lead to more questions that will help your students analyze what they have read: The first asks students to use their natural visual abilities to graphically represent the relationship of the ideas in the essay to one another; the second activity asks students to divide the selection into meaningful segments and label their rhetorical purpose in the essay. The final exercise in this category prompts students to analyze their findings. All of these activities will lead students to a better understanding of how ideas can be presented and developed in relation to one another in a text.
Activity 7: Considering the Structure of the Text
Learning more about the structure of the text will give you a better understanding of the writer’s approach to its content. Your work on this activity will help you understand the text’s structure as you apply it to your own writing. Making Discoveries
Working in pairs, create a picture outline showing how this essay is structured.
Talk with your partner until you have negotiated a graphic outline that represents how the essay is laid out.
Find another pair, and compare your graphics:
• How are they different?
• How are they the same?
• What major discovery did you make from this exercise?
Descriptive Outlining
Now follow these directions on the essay itself:
• Draw a line across the page where the introduction ends.
• Draw a line across the page where the conclusion begins.
• Draw lines throughout the body of the text that break the text into meaningful segments.
• Then, for each of your segments, label in the left margin its content (what is says).
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• Then, in the right margin label the rhetorical purpose of each segment (why the writer included it in the essay).
Here is a brief outline of the essay:
Background—significance of topic
• Total number of people stopped by New York police in 2009
• Racial makeup of people stopped
• Percentage of people with weapons
Reactions to stops
Reasons for stops
Stories
Commissioner Kelly’s statement
Herbert’s Conclusion
Analyzing Your Findings
Before moving on, discuss the following questions as a class:
• What is the rhetorical purpose of each section you marked?
• How do you suspect each section will affect the readers?
• What is the writer trying to accomplish in each section?
• Which section is most developed?
• Which section is least developed?
• Why do you think the author made these choices?
• On the basis of your descriptive outline of the text, what do you think is the writer’s main claim or argument?
FA Formative Assessment
As an exit slip, have students record individually which section of the text is most persuasive from their point of view. Then have them explain why it is persuasive. These slips will help you learn what your students actually understand of the professional essay’s content and rhetorical strategies.
Reading –
Informational Text
4. Determine the meaning of words and phrases as they are used in a text, including figurative, connotative, and technical meanings; analyze how an author uses and refines the meaning of a key term or terms over the course of a text (e.g., how Madison defines faction in Federalist No. 10).
Noticing Language
This section helps students recognize language patterns in their reading for two purposes: (1) to deepen their understanding of the reading and (2) to be able to use these or similar patterns in their own writing. The following activity asks questions that will guide students to discovering these patterns for themselves.
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b. Work with peers to promote civil, democratic discussions and decision-making, set clear goals and deadlines, and establish individual roles as needed.
c. Propel conversations by posing and responding to questions that probe reasoning and evidence; ensure a hearing for a full range of positions on a topic or issue; clarify, verify, or challenge ideas and conclusions; and promote divergent and creative perspectives.
d. Respond thoughtfully to diverse perspectives; synthesize comments, claims, and evidence made on all sides of an issue; resolve contradictions when possible; and determine what additional information or research is required to deepen the investigation or complete the task. MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Language
1. Demonstrate command of the conventions of standard
English grammar and usage when writing or speaking.
a. Apply the understanding that usage is a matter of convention, can change over time, and is sometimes contested. b. Resolve issues of complex or contested usage, consulting references (e.g.,
Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary of English Usage,
Garner’s Modern
American Usage) as needed.
Activity 8: Noticing Language
Herbert uses two patterns that are especially effective in his essays: (1) the passive voice and (2) word repetition.
The passive voice is applied to a verb in a sentence when the “doer” or actual
“agent” of the action is after the verb in a “by” phrase or completely missing rather than before the verb. Also, a passive verb always includes a form of “be” and a past participle.
Examples: “is practiced,” “was frisked,” “has been stopped”
Agents can be added to a passive verb in a “by” phrase.
Passive: Racial profiling is practiced in New York (by the police).
Active: Police practice racial profiling in New York.
Writers often use the passive when they don’t know or don’t want to reveal the agent or “doer” of their action. Herbert relies heavily on the passive in his essay because in most cases he often doesn’t know who was responsible for the action he is calling into question.
Herbert starts his essay with a sentence in the passive voice:
“The New York City Police Department needs to be restrained” [by whom?].
What other passive verbs do you see in this essay? What effect does this linguistic pattern have on you as a reader?
• Paragraph 2: were stopped and frisked, were stopped
• Paragraph 3:was found, was found
• Paragraph 4: were found
• Paragraph 7: is stopped, is frisked, were stopped, were also frisked
• Paragraph 9: are stopped
• Paragraph 11: were interrupted, was stopped, was stopped and searched, was held
• Paragraph 12: are menaced, [are] forced, are . . . threatened
Effect: The passive voice makes the people being stopped, frisked, and searched more like victims—not in control
Notice that all the sentences after paragraph 12 are in the active voice. What effect does this shift from passive to active voice have on the message that
Herbert is delivering?
The active voice at the end of the essay suggests that the people need to re-establish their control over law enforcement’s use of racial profiling.
In this essay, Herbert also repeats specific words that capture the readers’ attention and keep the focus on these particular concepts. Two examples are stop and frisk, which are repeated throughout the essay. Find three other words or parts of words that Herbert repeats in this essay. What is the effect of these repetitions? 10
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• black
• Hispanic
• percentage
• harassment
• police
• people
• constitutional/unconstitutional
Repetitions emphasize a particular concept and force the readers to see it as a key concept in the reading.
Prerequisite Grade 8
Standard: Reading –
Informational Text
1. Cite the textual evidence that most strongly supports an analysis of what the text says explicitly as well as inferences drawn from the text.
2. Determine a central idea of a text and analyze its development over the course of the text, including its relationship to supporting ideas; …
Grades 11-12
Reading –
Informational Text
2. Determine two or more central ideas of a text and analyze their development over the course of the text, including how they interact and build on one another to provide a complex analysis; …
Annotating and Questioning the Text
Annotating and questioning the text encourages students to process the material in a way that is relevant to them. In the initial reading, students read “with the grain,” playing the “believing game.” In this second reading, they should read “against the grain,” playing the “doubting game.” As your students reread a text, they will develop fluency and build their vocabularies, both of which are integral to successful comprehension.
As students reread the text, ask them to annotate it by making marginal notations (e.g., asking questions, expressing surprise, disagreeing elaborating, and noting any instances of confusion).
Activity 9: Rereading the Text
As you read the essay again, do the following tasks:
• Record the essay’s thesis.
“Ethnic profiling by law-enforcement authorities in the United States comes in many forms, and all of them are disgusting” (par. 3).
• State the thesis as a question.
How does racial profiling occur in the United States?
• Highlight the details throughout the essay that directly answer the question you have written.
• On your copy of the essay, label the following points in the left-hand margin: - The introduction
- The issue or problem the author is writing about
- Examples given by the author
- The author’s main arguments
- The conclusion
• In the right-hand margin, write your reactions to what the author is saying.
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Repeated words:
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Initially, you may want to do this activity collaboratively as a class. Later, ask your students to exchange their annotations and compare their labeling and responses in small groups or in pairs.
Reading –
Informational Text
Analyzing Stylistic Choices
4. Determine the meaning of words and phrases as they are used in a text, including figurative, connotative, and technical meanings; analyze how an author uses and refines the meaning of a key term or terms over the course of a text (e.g., how Madison defines faction in Federalist No. 10),
This particular line of questioning is offered to help students see that the linguistic choices writers make create certain effects for their readers.
The questions in Activity 10 are divided into two categories: Words and
Sentences. You might ask your students to discuss these questions as a class, in small groups, or in individual written assignments.
Language
3. Apply knowledge of language to understand how language functions in different contexts, to make effective choices for meaning or style, and to comprehend more fully when reading or listening.
a. …apply an understanding of syntax to the study of complex texts when reading.
5. Demonstrate understanding of figurative language, word relationships, and nuances in word meanings.
a. Interpret figures of speech (e.g., hyperbole, paradox) in context and analyze their role in the text.
b. Analyze nuances in the meaning of words with similar denotations.
Activity 10: Analyzing Stylistic Choices
Answer the following questions about the words and sentences in this essay to help you understand how the linguistic choices the author has made create certain effects for readers.
Words
1. What does the term “racial profiling” bring to mind for you? Which other words refer to this term—either directly or indirectly?
(Answers to the first question will vary.)
Words: “stopping,” “frisking,” “profiling,” “law enforcement,” “unconstitutional,”
“black,” and “Hispanic”
2. Why do you think Herbert makes these different references to racial profiling? To emphasize the breadth of the concept
3. This essay has several strong words that draw on readers’ emotions. Circle the words that are the most highly charged and be prepared to explain your choices. Why does Herbert use these highly charged words? What effect do they have?
(Answers will vary, but some of the highly charged words are “abomination,”
“harassment,” “laughably bogus,” and “specious.”)
Sentences
1. Is the author’s sentence structure mostly varied or not? What effect does the variety or lack of variety have on the essay?
Herbert uses a combination of simple, compound, complex, and compoundcomplex sentences in this essay, concentrating mostly on simple and complex.
2. Are the sentences readable? Explain your answer.
The author’s varied sentence structure makes the essay very readable. It does not become stagnant at any point.
3. What effect are Herbert’s sentences likely to have on his readers?
His sentence variety will most likely keep the readers engaged and focused.
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Prerequisite Grade 8
Standard: Reading –
Informational Text
2. Determine a central idea of a text and analyze its development over the course of the text, including its relationship to supporting ideas; provide an objective summary of the text.
Grades 11-12
Reading –
Informational Text
2. Determine two or more central ideas of a text and analyze their development over the course of the text, including how they interact and build on one another to provide a complex analysis; provide an objective summary of the text.
Writing
2. Write informative/ explanatory texts to examine and convey complex ideas, concepts, and information clearly and accurately through the effective selection, organization, and analysis of content. 10. Write routinely over extended time frames (time for research, reflection, and revision) and shorter time frames
(a single sitting or a day or two) for a range of tasks, purposes, and audiences.
Prerequisite
Grades 9-10
Standard: Reading –
Informational Text
8. Delineate and evaluate the argument and specific claims in a text, assessing whether the reason-
Summarizing and Responding
Summarizing is a very important strategy that your students will need to learn. It involves extracting the main ideas from a reading selection and explaining what the author says about them. Summarizing is a powerful metacognitive skill that enables readers and writers to synthesize a text’s meaning. It integrates the results of previous reading processes students have engaged in and helps them further understand major ideas and the relationships among them. The act of responding to a summary engages students in forming their own reactions as they are refining their understanding of the author’s ideas and claims. Activity 11 provides a way to get students to summarize without using the traditional assignment, which often brings about negative associations, and then discuss the main ideas they have discovered. This activity has two parts that involve small groups and then the entire class.
Activity 11: Summarizing and Responding
Complete both of the activities below to make sure you understand how to summarize effectively.
Summarizing
The act of summarizing asks you to put someone else’s ideas into your own words, which will improve your understanding of those ideas. Using your previous notes and annotations, work in groups of three or four to summarize the essay’s main points in no more than five sentences. Then generate five questions that might serve as the basis of a class discussion. Use at least five vocabulary words from this module in your summary.
Answers will vary, but make sure your students’ questions actually come out of their summaries. Responding
Turn your questions in to your teacher, who will choose some for class discussion. Choose random questions from student-generated options, and conduct an open discussion of students’ reactions to the essay, with the intention being for them to articulate their opinions and confusions at this point in the process.
Thinking Critically
The following material is designed to move students smoothly and seamlessly into thinking critically about this material. The questions in Activity 12 will move your students through the traditional rhetorical appeals and will let them demonstrate their understanding of the featured vocabulary words. This
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Postreading
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
ing is valid and the evidence is relevant and sufficient; identify false statements and fallacious reasoning. Grades 11-12
Reading –
Informational Text
1. Cite strong and thorough textual evidence to support analysis of what the text says explicitly as well as inferences drawn from the text, including determining where the text leaves matters uncertain.
3. Analyze a complex set of ideas or sequence of events and explain how specific individuals, ideas, or events interact and develop over the course of the text.
5. Analyze and evaluate the effectiveness of the structure an author uses in his or her exposition or argument, including whether the structure makes points clear, convincing, and engaging.
6. Determine an author’s point of view or purpose in a text in which the rhetoric is particularly effective, analyzing how style and content contribute to the power, persuasiveness, or beauty of the text.
Speaking and
Listening
1. Initiate and participate effectively in a range of collaborative discussions (one-on-one, in groups, and teacher-led) with diverse partners on grades 11–12 topics, texts, and issues, building on others’ ideas and expressing their own clearly and persuasively.
a. Come to discussions prepared, having read and researched
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line of questioning will also help your students progress from a literal to an analytical understanding of the reading material.
To answer the questions about the writer (ethos), your students might go online and search for a biography of Robert Herbert at topics.nytimes.com.
The biography on that site reads as follows:
Bob Herbert is no longer writing his column for the New
York Times.
Bob Herbert joined the New York Times as an Op-Ed columnist in June 1993. He writes about politics, urban affairs and social trends in a twice-weekly column.
From January 1991 to May 1993, Mr. Herbert was a national correspondent for NBC and reported regularly on the Today Show and NBC Nightly News.
A founding panelist of Sunday Edition, a weekly discussion program on
WCBS-TV, Mr. Herbert was also the host of Hotline, a weekly hour-long issues program on WNYC-TV, both beginning in 1990.
Previously, Mr. Herbert worked at the Daily News beginning in 1976. His positions at the Daily News included general assignment reporter, national correspondent, consumer affairs editor, city hall bureau chief and city editor.
In 1985, he became a columnist and a member of the Editorial Board. His column continued to appear in the Daily News until February 1993.
His career began in 1970 as a reporter, then night city editor in 1973, of the
Star-Ledger in Newark, NJ.
Born in Brooklyn, Mr. Herbert earned a Bachelor of Science degree in journalism from the State University of New York (Empire State College).
He has taught journalism at Brooklyn College and the Columbia University
School of Journalism.
He has won numerous awards, including the Meyer Berger Award for coverage of New York City, the American Society of Newspaper Editors Award for distinguished newspaper writing, the David Nyhan Prize from the Shorenstein
Center at Harvard University for excellence in political reporting, and the
Ridenhour Courage Prize for the “fearless articulation of unpopular truths.”
Mr. Herbert is the author of Promises Betrayed: Waking Up from the American
Dream (Times Books, 2005).
Mr. Herbert is married and lives in Manhattan.
Activity 12: Thinking Critically—Logos, Ethos, Pathos
The following questions and activities will help you gain a deeper understanding of the Herbert essay. Answer the following questions as thoroughly as you can, choosing evidence from the reading selection to support your answer.
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Questions about Logic (Logos)
1. What are two major claims the author makes in this essay?
Racial profiling is degrading and humiliating.
Racial profiling is unconstitutional.
Racial profiling victimizes innocent people.
Racial profiling is racist.
2. What support does the author provide for these assertions?
3. Can you think of counterarguments the author does not deal with?
He doesn’t discuss whether or not there are any positive consequences from racial profiling. For example, have any criminal acts been stopped or deterred because of racial profiling?
4. Do you think the author has left something out on purpose? Why?
Questions about the Writer (Ethos)
1. Does this author have the right background to speak with authority on this subject? Yes, he has written on politics and urban affairs for the New York Times since
1993.
2. Is this author knowledgeable? Smart? Successful?
His biography supports these descriptions.
3. What does the author’s style and language tell you about him?
His engaging writing style tells us that he thinks deeply and complexly about these issues.
4. Do you trust this author? Why or why not?
5. Do you think this author is deceptive? Why or why not?
6. Do you think this author is serious? Explain your answer.
Questions about Emotions (Pathos)
1. Does this piece affect you emotionally? Which parts?
2. Do you think the author is trying to manipulate readers’ emotions? How?
3. Do your emotions conflict with your logical interpretation of the arguments? 4. Does the author use humor? How does that affect your acceptance of the author’s ideas?
Completing a PAPA Square for the essay will prepare your students further for the writing they are about to do.
Activity 13: PAPA Square
Now that you have answered the questions in Activity 12, you will analyze these issues further by completing a PAPA Square and a quickwrite.
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material under study; explicitly draw on that preparation by referring to evidence from texts and other research on the topic or issue to stimulate a thoughtful, well-reasoned exchange of ideas. b. Work with peers to promote civil, democratic discussions and decision-making, set clear goals and deadlines, and establish individual roles as needed.
c. Propel conversations by posing and responding to questions that probe reasoning and evidence; ensure a hearing for a full range of positions on a topic or issue; clarify, verify, or challenge ideas and conclusions; and promote divergent and creative perspectives.
d. Respond thoughtfully to diverse perspectives; synthesize comments, claims, and evidence made on all sides of an issue; resolve contradictions when possible; and determine what additional information or research is required to deepen the investigation or complete the task. MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
The rhetorical appeals of logos, ethos, and pathos form the basis of rhetorical analysis in this module. A PAPA Square will help you analyze these appeals in your reading and can be used in turn in your own writing. To apply this exercise to your reading, answer the questions around the outside of the box in reference to the essay. In the center, identify the stylistic devices and logical, emotional, and ethical appeals the writer uses to persuade his or her audience.
Now fill in the PAPA Square for the Herbert essay.
Purpose
(What is the writer’s purpose?)
Audience
(Who is the audience?)
Rhetorical Methods and Strategies
Logical Appeals
Argument
(What is the thesis or argument?) Pathetic Appeals
Ethical Appeals
Stylistic Devices
Persona
(What is the author’s persona or public image?)
FA Formative Assessment
Review your students’ PAPA Squares to discover the degree to which they understand the author’s purpose, audience, persona; the essay’s central argument; and the rhetorical appeals of logos, ethos, and pathos.
Provide feedback to students as necessary to help them strengthen their understanding of aspects of the PAPA Square, and discuss the author’s use of rhetorical appeals as warranted by your students’ work in this module so far.
Quickwrite (five minutes)
Choose one of the following topics and write for five minutes:
1. What does this writer want us to believe?
2. What is your response to one of the author’s main ideas?
You might read several of the quickwrites to the class to get a discussion started, have your students read their own quickwrites aloud, or have your students exchange quickwrites and read each other’s aloud.
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Purpose
To create a sense of public outrage over the use of ethnic profiling by lawenforcement authorities in New York
Audience
Rhetorical Methods
Argument
and Strategies
Readers of the New
That racial profiling
York Times (typically well-educated, urban, middle-class professionals) Logical Appeals
Numerical data: total number stopped, race of people stopped, number carrying weapons
is a widespread, unconscionable, unconstitutional violation of citizens’ rights Anecdote: Lalit Carson,
Deon Dennis
Cause/Effect: Lawsuit filed Pathetic Appeals
Strong Words:
“abomination,”
“despicable,”
“degrading,” “bogus,”
“specious”
Sarcasm: “suspicious bulge” Ethical Appeals
Appeal to authority:
Center for
Constitutional Rights
Stylistic Devices
Varied sentence structure Persona
A journalist who is an authority on “politics, urban affairs, and social trends” The strategies in this section of the
ERWC are designed to reinforce students’ learning of the content of the CCSS for
ELA/Literacy in the preceding sections of the template and transfer that learning to other settings.
Reflecting on Your Reading Process
Reflection is an essential component of learning. Students can benefit from either discussing or writing about what they have learned—bringing their reading process to the conscious level. To this end, you might ask your students to respond to the following questions as the source of a quickwrite or a discussion:
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
A sample PAPA Square for “Jim Crow Policing” follows.
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Activity 14: Reflecting on Your Reading Process
Respond to the following questions in a quickwrite:
• What have you learned so far from joining the conversation on this topic?
• What do you still want to learn next?
• What reading strategies did you use or learn in this module? Which strategies will you use in reading other texts? How will these strategies apply to your work in other classes?
• In what ways has your ability to read and discuss texts like this one improved? FA Formative Assessment
Reviewing these quickwrites will let you know what your students know, what they need to know, and where to focus your attention in class.
Connecting Reading to Writing
Writing
5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by planning … focusing on addressing what is most significant for a specific purpose and audience.
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Discovering What You Think
Considering the Writing Task
Many students have trouble with writing assignments because they do not read the assignment carefully. Here are some strategies to help your students overcome this problem:
•• Read the assignment carefully with your students. Help them identify key verbs in writing assignments and define the nature of the support they should provide.
•• Help students specify the topic or focus of the text they are going to write.
Is the topic specified for them? Do they have choices to make about it?
•• Help students determine the rhetorical purpose of the writing. Are they informing or reporting? Are they persuading their readers of something?
Help them recognize how the purpose of the assignment will affect the type of writing they will do. Here are some questions to help them consider this issue:
- What genre is this? Is it a letter, an essay, a report, an email, or something else?
- What format will it have?
- What are the reader expectations for this genre?
- What is your rhetorical purpose?
•• Have your students look for information in the assignment about the audience to whom the writing will be addressed.
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Activity 15: Considering the Writing Task
Reading the assignment carefully to make sure you address all aspects of the prompt is important.
Writing Task
Write an essay that presents your opinion on a controversial issue of your choice. Consult various media sources if you need some ideas. Begin with a debatable thesis statement. Then follow the guidelines for writing an argument essay. As you write your essay, be sure you support your claims with well-chosen evidence. If something in the media (such as a newspaper article, ad, or speech) inspired this assignment, attach a copy to your paper before you turn it in.
Take the following steps for this exercise:
• Read the assignment carefully.
• Decide which issue you are going to discuss.
• Discuss the purpose of the assignment (what will you try to accomplish in writing your essay?).
Writing
5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by planning … focusing on addressing what is most significant for a specific purpose and audience.
9. Draw evidence from literary or informational texts to support analysis, reflection, and research. Speaking and
Listening
1. Initiate and participate effectively in a range of collaborative discussions
(one-on-one, in groups, and teacherled) with diverse partners on grades
11–12 topics, texts, and issues, building
Taking a Stance
Most students will find it helpful to formulate a working thesis statement at this point. They can go through their “invention” work to decide on a statement or assertion they want to develop. Although students can be successful with different approaches to writing, a strong, focused thesis statement can keep the writer on track. This statement may change as students read evidence on their topic, but it will serve as an anchor for each student’s point of view.
Encourage your students to answer the questions in Activity 16 as thoroughly as possible.
Activity 16: Taking a Stance
Taking a stance on your topic at this point in the writing process is essential.
This involves developing a tentative thesis statement and then “trying on” different perspectives within that framework. The two activities in this section will guide you to a position on your topic.
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•• Remind your students to read the assignment for information about process and deadlines. Help your students sketch out a timeline for completing the assignment in reasonable steps.
•• Ask your students to examine the assignment for information about how they will be graded. According to what criteria will their written work be evaluated? Do they understand each criterion?
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
on others’ ideas and expressing their own clearly and persuasively.
Developing a Tentative Thesis Statement
To begin this process, read as many different perspectives on your topic as you can find. As you read, settle on what you think your stance will be. Then answer the following questions:
1. What specific question will your essay answer? What is your response to this question? (This is your tentative thesis.)
2. What support have you found for your thesis?
3. What evidence have you found for this support (for example, facts, statistics, statements from authorities, personal stories, and examples)?
4. How much background information do your readers need to understand your topic and thesis?
5. If readers were to disagree with your thesis or the validity of your support, what would they say? How would you address their concerns (what would you say to them)?
Developing a tentative thesis now will help you take a stand on the issue you have chosen to write about. Your thesis should be a complete sentence that includes your topic and your opinion on that topic. It can be revised several times, but will ultimately keep your writing on track. Draft a possible thesis for your essay now.
After your students have formulated a working thesis and before they generate their first drafts, give them feedback on their thesis statements, either individually or collectively. Potential writing problems can be averted at this stage.
Trying on Words, Perspectives, and Ideas
Before you actually write a draft, identify two perspectives that would disagree with your stand on the issue. Take on their perspectives and draft a quickwrite from each of their stances.
FA Formative Assessment
At the end of this activity, ask students to draft a statement addressing the
“biggest concern” they have about writing this particular paper. Then, have them share these concerns in three different small groups while you circulate to assess what they need to progress to the next step in their own writing as individuals and as a class.
When you receive these statements, you will have the opportunity to provide students with various forms of supportive feedback, including encouragement for exploring the topic they selected, suggested readings, questions to consider, and advice on their “biggest concern” about the paper.
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Gathering Evidence to Support Your Claims
7. Integrate and evaluate multiple sources of information presented in different media or formats (e.g., visually, quantitatively) as well as in words in order to address a question or solve a problem. Students can select evidence by returning to the readings, their notes, their summaries, their annotations, their descriptive outlining, and other responses in order to find information they may use to support their position and refute the claims of those who disagree. As they gather evidence, they must evaluate it. The next activity will help them gather evidence and evaluate their claims.
Writing
7. Conduct short as well as more sustained research projects to answer a question (including a self-generated question) or solve a problem; narrow or broaden the inquiry when appropriate; synthesize multiple sources on the subject, demonstrating understanding of the subject under investigation. 8. Gather relevant information from multiple authoritative print and digital sources, using advanced searches effectively; assess the strengths and limitations of each source in terms of the task, purpose, and audience; integrate information into the text selectively to maintain the flow of ideas, avoiding plagiarism and overreliance on any one source and following a standard format for citation including footnotes and endnotes.
9. Draw evidence from literary or informational texts to support analysis, reflection, and research. Activity 17: Gathering Evidence to Support Your Claims
As you begin to choose evidence that will support your claims, you must be able to evaluate that information. From your previous work, list the information you are considering using to prove your point. For each item on your list, write down your responses to the following questions:
• How does the piece of evidence support your claim?
• Is it a fact or opinion? If it is an opinion, what facts can you find to support it? • Will the evidence be persuasive to your audience?
Now put a check mark by the items that will serve as good evidence based on these criteria.
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Reading –
Informational Text
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Writing
5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by planning, …, focusing on addressing what is most significant for a specific purpose and audience.
10. Write routinely over extended time frames (time for research, reflection, and revision) and shorter time frames
(a single sitting or a day or two) for a range of tasks, purposes, and audiences.
Getting Ready to Write
Students now need to generate more ideas in preparation for composing a draft of their papers. With the framework of the ideas they took from their work related to this topic, they now need to weave more of their own thoughts and ideas into their plans for developing their essays. The following “prewriting” strategies will help your students move smoothly from reading to writing:
•• Brainstorming
•• Freewriting
•• Informal outlines
•• Clustering/Mapping
•• Quickwrites
Your students may want to refer to their reading notes before engaging in
Activity 18.
Activity 18: Getting Ready to Write
The following exercise will help you move from reading to writing. Once you have chosen a controversial issue and gathered some evidence, you need to fold in your own thoughts and ideas. Either by brainstorming (listing) or freewriting
(writing your thoughts down in prose as fast as they occur), respond to the following questions:
• What is the exact issue?
• Why is it important?
• Do people care about it?
• What is most important about this issue?
• What are some other points of view on this topic?
• How do you think the issue should be resolved?
Writing Rhetorically
Entering the Conversation
Writing
1. Write arguments to support claims in an analysis of substantive topics or texts, using valid reasoning and relevant and sufficient evidence.
4. Produce clear and coherent writing in which the development, organization, and style are
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Composing a Draft
The first draft of an essay provides an opportunity for students to discover what they think about a certain topic. This draft is usually “writer- based,” the goal being simply to get the writer’s ideas down on paper. Your students should start with their brainstorming notes, informal outlines, freewriting, or whatever other materials they have and write a rough draft of their essays.
The guidelines in Activity 19 will teach your students how to write successful arguments. CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Activity 19: Composing a Draft
When you write an argument essay, choose a subject that matters to you. If you have strong feelings, you will find it much easier to gather evidence and convince your readers of your point of view. Keep in mind, however, that your readers might feel just as strongly about the opposite side of the issue. Use the following guidelines to help you write your argument:
1. State your opinion on the topic in your thesis statement.
To write a thesis statement for an argument essay, you will need to take a stand for or against an action or an idea. In other words, your thesis statement must be debatable—a statement that can be argued or challenged and that will not be met with agreement by everyone who reads it. Your thesis statement introduces your subject and states your opinion about that subject.
Bob Herbert’s thesis is his first sentence: “The New York City Police
Department needs to be restrained.” This is a debatable thesis. Some other statements on the topic of ethnic profiling would not be good thesis statements:
• Not debatable: Ethnic profiling by law-enforcement authorities in the
United States often involves minorities.
• Not debatable: Some law-enforcement agencies have strict rules regarding racial profiling.
Herbert sets up his essay with some facts about racial profiling and several references to the practice in New York of stopping and frisking blacks and Hispanics. This background information expands upon his thesis statement.
2. Find out as much as you can about your audience before you write.
Knowing your readers’ backgrounds and feelings on your topic will help you choose the best supporting evidence and examples. Suppose that you want to convince people in two different age groups to quit smoking.
You might tell the group of teenagers that cigarettes make their breath rancid, their teeth yellow, and their clothes smelly. But with a group of adults, you might discuss the horrifying statistics on lung and heart disease associated with long-term smoking.
Herbert’s essay was first published in the New York Times, which addresses a fairly educated audience. The original readers probably thought much like he does on this issue. So he chose his support as if he were talking to people who agree with him.
3. Choose evidence that supports your thesis statement.
Evidence is definitely the most important factor in writing an argument essay. Without solid evidence, your essay is nothing more than opinion; with it, your essay can be powerful and persuasive. If you supply convincing evidence, your readers will not only understand your position but perhaps agree with it.
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
appropriate to task, purpose, and audience.
9. Draw evidence from literary or informational texts to support analysis, reflection, and research. 10. Write routinely over extended time frames (time for research, reflection, and revision) and shorter time frames
(a single sitting or a day or two) for a range of tasks, purposes, and audiences.
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Evidence can consist of facts, statistics, statements from authorities, personal stories, or examples. Personal stories and examples can be based on your own observations, experiences, and reading, but your opinions are not evidence. Other strategies, such as comparison/contrast, definition, and cause/effect, can be particularly useful in building an argument. Use any combination of evidence and writing strategies that supports your thesis statement.
In his essay, Herbert uses several different types of evidence. Here are some examples:
Facts
• Not everyone who is stopped is frisked (par. 7).
• The Center for Constitutional Rights filed a class-action lawsuit against
New York and the police department (par. 11).
• Paul Browne is the chief spokesman for Commissioner Kelly (par. 14).
Statistics
• In 2009, 450,000 people were stopped by cops (par. 2).
• 84 percent of the stops were black and Hispanic (par. 3).
• Contraband was found in 1.6 percent of the black cases, 1.5 percent of the Hispanic, and 1.5 percent of the white (par. 3).
• Weapons were found on 1.1 percent of the blacks, 1.4 percent of the
Hispanics, 1.7 percent of the whites (par. 4).
• Police stopped more than a half million people in 2008 (par. 6)
• Of those stopped, 59.4 percent of the Hispanics were frisked, 56.6 percent of blacks, and 46 percent of whites (par. 7).
Statements from Authorities
• Center for Constitutional Rights (par. 11)
• Police Department (par. 13)
• Paul Browne (par. 14)
• Police Commissioner Kelly (par. 14)
Personal Stories and Examples
• The story about Lalit Carson (par. 11)
• The story about Deon Dennis (par. 11)
4. Anticipate opposing points of view.
In addition to stating and supporting your position, anticipating and responding to opposing views are important. Presenting only your side of the argument leaves half the story untold—the opposition’s half. If you acknowledge that there are opposing arguments and address them, your argument will be more convincing.
In paragraph 14, Herbert acknowledges as opposition a statement made by Paul Browne on behalf of Police Commissioner Kelly. Browne feels the stops are “life-saving.” By acknowledging this statement, Herbert raises his credibility. He then goes on to refute Browne’s claim in the next paragraph.
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Pointing out common ground between you and your opponent is also an effective strategy. “Common ground” refers to points of agreement between two opposing positions. For example, one person might be in favor of gun control and another strongly opposed. But they might find common ground—agreement—in the need to keep guns out of teenagers’ hands. Locating some common ground is possible in almost every situation. When you state in your essay that you agree with your opponent on certain points, your reader sees you as a fair person.
Herbert assumes that most of his readers know that ethnic profiling by law-enforcement agencies is going on around the country. His job, then, is to prove the extent and unfairness of it.
6. Maintain a reasonable tone.
Just as you probably wouldn’t win an argument by shouting or making mean or nasty comments, don’t expect your readers to respond well to such tactics. Keep the “voice” of your essay calm and sensible. Your readers will be much more open to what you have to say if they think you are a reasonable person.
Herbert maintains a reasonable tone throughout his essay. Every now and then, he is aggressive—“Racial profiling . . . is an abomination” (par. 1)— and even sarcastic—a “suspicious bulge” (par. 9). But even when he quotes some unbelievable statistics, as he does in paragraphs 2 through 4, he keeps his voice under control and, therefore, earns the respect of his readers.
Writing
1. Write arguments to support claims in an analysis of substantive topics or texts, using valid reasoning and relevant and sufficient evidence.
a. Introduce precise, knowledgeable claim(s), establish the significance of the claim(s), distinguish the claim(s) from alternate or opposing claims, and create an organization that logically sequences claim(s), counterclaims, reasons, and evidence. b. Develop claim(s) and counterclaims fairly and thoroughly, supplying the most relevant evi-
Considering Structure
No rigid formula will cover all of the writing that students may be asked to do, but almost all writing has a beginning, middle, and end—even lab reports and journal articles have standard formats. The following items are traditional parts of all essays:
•• The introduction (usually one or two paragraphs), which “hooks” the reader and provides a thesis statement or road map for the reader;
•• The body (as many paragraphs as necessary), which supports the thesis statement point by point;
•• The conclusion (usually only one paragraph), which summarizes the main points and explains the significance of the argument.
In addition, the number of paragraphs in an essay depends on the nature and complexity of the argument. Here are some additional hints to give your students to help them organize their thoughts:
Introduction
Include the following in your introductory paragraph:
•• A “hook” to get the reader’s attention
•• Background information the audience may need
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
5. Find some common ground.
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
dence for each while pointing out the strengths and limitations of both in a manner that anticipates the audience’s knowledge level, concerns, values, and possible biases. c. Use words, phrases, and clauses as well as varied syntax to link the major sections of the text, create cohesion, and clarify the relationships between claim(s) and reasons, between reasons and evidence, and between claim(s) and counterclaims. e. Provide a concluding statement or section that follows from and supports the argument presented. 2a. Introduce a topic or thesis statement; organize complex ideas, concepts, and information so that each new element builds on that which precedes it to create a unified whole; include formatting
(e.g., headings), graphics (e.g., figures, tables), and multimedia when useful to aiding comprehension. 2b. Develop the topic thoroughly by selecting the most significant and relevant facts, extended definitions, concrete details, quotations, or other information and examples appropriate to the audience’s knowledge of the topic.
2c. Use appropriate and varied transitions and syntax to link the major sections of the text, create cohesion, and clarify the relationships
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•• A thesis statement along with some indication of how the essay will be developed (“forecasting”). Note: The thesis statement states the topic of the essay and the writer’s position on that topic. You may choose to sharpen or narrow your thesis at this point.
Body
The body of an essay should consist of the following parts:
•• Paragraphs that present support for the thesis statement, usually in topic sentences supported with evidence. (Refer to “Getting Ready to Write.”)
•• Paragraphs that include different points of view or address counterarguments
•• Paragraphs or sentences in which you address those points of view by doing the following:
- Refuting them
- Acknowledging them but showing how your argument is better
- Granting them altogether but showing they are irrelevant
•• Evidence that you have considered the values, beliefs, and assumptions of the audience; your own values, beliefs, and assumptions; and some common ground that appeals to the various points of view
Conclusion
The final paragraph (or paragraphs) should consider the following:
•• A review of the argument that supports your thesis
•• The significance of the argument—the “so what?” factor
Activity 20: Considering Structure
All essays should have a beginning, a middle, and an end. This is true of writing in all disciplines. An argument essay has these same divisions with a few more features that will communicate your stance and present your claims as clearly as possible. Since you want your audience to agree with you by the end of your essay, you need to organize it in such a way that your readers can easily follow it. The guidelines in this section will help you organize the material you have gathered into a coherent essay.
The first outline shows the order in which the features of an argument essay are most effective:
Introduction
1. Background information
2. Introduction of the subject
3. Statement of opinion
Body Paragraphs
1. Common ground
2. Lots of evidence (logical and emotional)
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
3. Opposing points of view
4. Response to the opposing points of view
Conclusion
1. Restatement of your position
2. Call for action or agreement
Bob Herbert’s essay follows the general outline just presented. Here is a skeleton outline of his essay:
Introduction
1. Background information about racial profiling in New York City
2. Subject introduced
3. Statement of opinion
Body Paragraphs
1. Evidence: Statistics (par. 2-7)
2. Common ground: Humiliation, fear (par. 8)
3. More background: Reasons for stops (par. 9-10)
4. More evidence: Personal narratives (par. 11-12)
5. Opposing points of view: Police department, Paul Browne (par. 13-14)
6. Response to the opposing points of view: Logical and emotional response
(par. 15)
Conclusion
1. Restatement of the solution (par. 16)
2. Call to action (par. 16)
The arrangement of your evidence in an argument essay depends to a great extent on your readers’ opinions. Most arguments will be organized from general to particular, from particular to general, or from one extreme to another. When you know that your readers already agree with you, arranging your details from general to particular or from most to least important is usually the most effective approach. Using this order, you build on your readers’ agreement and loyalty as you explain your thinking on the subject.
If you suspect that your audience does not agree with you, reverse the organization of your evidence and arrange it from particular to general or from least to most important. In this way, you can take your readers step by step through your reasoning in an attempt to get them to agree with you.
Organize your essay in a way that represents what you just learned in this section. Then draw horizontal lines through your essay to distinguish its beginning, middle, and end. Finally, label the key features of your argument by using the terms from the first outline in this section.
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
among complex ideas and concepts.
2d. Use precise language, domainspecific vocabulary, and techniques such as metaphor, simile, and analogy to manage the complexity of the topic.
2f. Provide a concluding statement or section that follows from and supports the information or explanation presented (e.g., articulating implications or the significance of the topic).
4. Produce clear and coherent writing in which the development, organization, and style are appropriate to task, purpose, and audience.
9. Draw evidence from literary or informational texts to support analysis, reflection, and research. MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
FA Formative Assessment
Ask students to complete an Exit Slip by responding to the following questions:
• How have you used the guidelines in this activity to help structure your paper? • How have these guidelines contributed to your planning of the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion?
When reviewing these slips, you can identify students who may need additional guidance in the development of their papers, such as how to develop body paragraphs, that can become the focus of mini-lessons given to the whole class.
Writing
8. Gather relevant information from multiple authoritative print and digital sources, using advanced searches effectively; assess the strengths and limitations of each source in terms of the task, purpose, and audience; integrate information into the text selectively to maintain the flow of ideas, avoiding plagiarism and overreliance on any one source and following a standard format for citation including footnotes and endnotes.
Using the Words of Others (And Avoiding Plagiarism)
Learning to cite sources accurately and determining how best to incorporate the words and ideas of others are essential for students to establish their own ethos.
The information here will help your students begin to prepare themselves for incorporating the words of others into their own writing. This form of synthesis is an important and complex writing skill. During this process, students will naturally use their content words from the module as they synthesize.
Activity 21: Using the Words of Others
One of the most important features of academic writing is the use of words and ideas from written sources to support your own points. Essentially, there are three ways to incorporate words and ideas from sources into your own writing:
1. Direct quotation. Bob Herbert says, “The nonstop humiliation of young black and Hispanic New Yorkers, including children, by police officers who feel no obligation to treat them fairly or with any respect at all is an abomination” (par. 1).
2. Paraphrase. In “Jim Crow Policing,” Bob Herbert notes that racial profiling in New York of black and Hispanic citizens is humiliating and unfair (par. 1).
This is a paraphrase of the quotation in #1; you can also paraphrase an entire article by putting it in your own words.
3. Summary. In “Jim Crow Policing,” Bob Herbert cites statistics and stories from New York City to prove that racial profiling is extensive and unjust.
The New York Police Commissioner claims that these “stops” are “lifesaving.” But according to the statistics the author provides, too often innocent citizens are harassed and the stops are unwarranted (par. 1).
In-Text Citation. MLA documentation style also requires in-text citations for every direct quotation, indirect quotation, paraphrase, or summary. If the author’s name is given in the text, the page number should be furnished in parentheses at the end of the sentence containing the material. If the author’s name is not provided in your essay, put the author’s name and page number in parentheses after the material.
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CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Prerequisite Grade 8
Standard: Reading –
Informational Text
9. Analyze a case in which two or more texts provide conflicting information on the same topic and identify where the texts disagree on matters of fact or interpretation. Reading –
Informational Text
6. Determine an author’s point of view or purpose in a text in which the rhetoric is particularly effective, analyzing how style and content contribute to the power, persuasiveness, or beauty of the text.
Writing
1d. & 2e. Establish and maintain a formal style and objective tone while attending to the norms and conventions of the discipline in which they are writing.
Language
3. Apply knowledge of language to understand how language functions in different contexts, to make effective choices for meaning or style, and to comprehend more fully when reading or listening.
Negotiating Voices
The goal of negotiating voices is for students to be able to distinguish their ideas from those of their sources and to clarify their stance in relation to those sources. In the section above, students practiced selecting useful and interesting material, punctuating direct quotations, and finding the language for paraphrases and summaries. The following activity can help students put direct quotations, indirect quotations, concepts, facts, ideas, and opinions from other writers into their own texts while keeping all the voices distinct.
Activity 22: Negotiating Voices
One strategy to help you mark the separate voices in an essay that you write is to use clear introductory language, such as the following templates or sentence frames: General Purpose Frames
• The issue of ______ can be viewed from several different perspectives.
• Experts disagree on what to do about ______.
To Introduce the Words of Experts
• Noted researcher John Q. Professor argues that _______.
• In a groundbreaking article, Hermando H. Scientist states that ________.
• According to Patricia A. Politician ________.
To Introduce Contrary Views
• However, the data presented by Hermando H. Scientist show ________.
• On the other hand, Terry T. Teacher believes ________.
To Introduce Your Own Views
• Although some argue for ________, others argue for _______. In my view
________.
• Though researchers disagree, clearly ________.
Many similar frames for introducing the words and ideas of others and signaling a stance on those ideas can be found in They Say/I Say: The Moves That Matter in
Academic Writing, by Gerald Graff and Cathy Birkenstein, an excellent resource for helping students enter the conversation in academic writing. Your students might also create their own frames by looking at language used by professional writers.
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Practice with Sources. Choose two passages from the reading selection that you might be able to use in your essay. First, write down each passage as a correctly punctuated direct quotation. Second, paraphrase the material in your own words. Finally, respond to the idea expressed in the passage by agreeing or disagreeing with it and explaining why. Now you are ready to use this material in an essay.
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Identifying Model Language
Return to the article you read by Bob Herbert, and underline all the quotations and paraphrases in the essay. Based on the model above, explain how two of these are introduced and distinguished from other perspectives and quotations in the essay.
Using Model Language
Now consider the evidence in the essay you are writing, and use these models to write one example for each of these categories (General Purpose, To Introduce the Words of Experts, To Introduce Contrary Views, and To Introduce Your
Own Views). Use the samples above as models only, and create a frame that fits into the context for your essay.
RG Rhetorical Grammar for Expository Reading and Writing
At this point, begin rhetorical grammar instruction for the Editing Student
Writing Activities 6-8. These activities should be taught in conjunction with the Revising and Editing activities in the module. Some of these activities could substitute for various editing activities in the module itself.
Revising and Editing
Writing
1c. Use words, phrases, and clauses as well as varied syntax to link the major sections of the text, create cohesion, and clarify the relationships between claim(s) and reasons, between reasons and evidence, and between claim(s) and counterclaims.
1d. & 2e. Establish and maintain a formal style and objective tone while attending to the norms and conventions of the discipline in which they are writing.
1f. Use specific rhetorical devices to support assertions
(e.g., appeal to logic through reasoning; appeal to emotion or ethical belief; relate a personal anecdote, case study, or analogy.
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Revising Rhetorically
Your students now need to work on the organization and development of their drafts to make sure their essays are as effective as possible. They should produce their next drafts on the basis of systematic feedback from others.
A rhetorical approach to revision can help your students understand that revision is a strategic, selective process and that ultimately what writers choose to revise depends on the purpose and audience for their writing.
When students revise rhetorically, their drafts will be more “reader-based” than the first drafts because the students will take into consideration the needs of the readers as they respond to the text.
Activity 23: Revising Rhetorically—Rhetorical Analysis
A rhetorical analysis of an essay requires you to assess writing based on the purpose of the writing, the message of the argument, the needs of the audience, and the persona the writer adopts. The following questions will get you started on a rhetorical revision:
• What is the rhetorical situation? Who is my audience, and what is my purpose? • What types of appeals (logical or emotional) will be most effective with this audience? CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
• How can I establish my own authority on this issue? What credibility do I have with this audience?
Just as it did in your reading, a PAPA Square can help you analyze the rhetorical strategies in your own writing. To apply this exercise to your writing, answer the questions around the outside of the box in reference to your own essay. In the center, identify the stylistic devices and logical, emotional, and ethical appeals you use to persuade your audience.
Fill in the PAPA Square below for your essay.
Purpose
(What is the writer’s purpose?)
Audience
(Who is the audience?)
Speaking and
Listening
1. Initiate and participate effectively in a range of collaborative discussions
(one-on-one, in groups, and teacherled) with diverse
Logical Appeals
Argument
(What is the thesis or argument?) Pathetic Appeals
Ethical Appeals
Reading –
Informational Text
1. Cite strong and thorough textual evidence to support analysis of what the text says explicitly as well as inferences drawn from the text, including determining where the text leaves matters uncertain.
5. Analyze and evaluate the effectiveness of the structure an author uses in his or her exposition or argument, including whether the structure makes points clear, convincing, and engaging.
6. Determine an author’s point of view or purpose in a text in which the rhetoric is particularly effective, analyzing how style and content contribute to the power, persuasiveness, or beauty of the text.
Rhetorical Methods and Strategies
Stylistic Devices
Persona
(What is the author’s persna or public image?)
Quickwrite (5 minutes): What did you learn about your essay from this analysis? Write freely and openly about the role of the appeals in your essay, your persona, your audience, and your purpose. Do you think this essay will persuade your readers?
The next stage of revision involves getting feedback from your peers.
Activity 24: Revision Workshop
Now that you have assessed your essay from your perspective, it is time to share it with some classmates.
Peer Group Work
Working in groups of three or four, read your essay aloud to the other members of the group. Then use Part I of the Evaluation Form provided by your teacher as a revising checklist for each essay.
(The Evaluation Form is at the end of the Assignment Template.)
Paired Work
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
2c. Use appropriate and varied transitions and syntax to link the major sections of the text, create cohesion, and clarify the relationships among complex ideas and concepts.
4. Produce clear and coherent writing in which the development, organization, and style are appropriate to task, purpose, and audience.
5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by … revising … rewriting, or trying a new approach, focusing on addressing what is most significant for a specific purpose and audience.
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
partners on grades
11–12 topics, texts, and issues, building on others’ ideas and expressing their own clearly and persuasively. Individual Work
Revise the draft based on the feedback you have received and the decisions you have made with your partners. Consider the following questions as revision guidelines for your individual work:
• Have I responded to the assignment?
• What is my purpose for this essay?
• What should I keep? Which parts are the most effective?
• What should I add? Where do I need more details, examples, and other evidence to support my point?
• What could I delete? Do I use irrelevant details? Am I repetitive?
• What should I change? Are parts of my essay confusing or contradictory? Do
I need to explain my ideas more fully?
• What should I rethink? Is my position clear? Have I provided enough analysis to convince my readers?
• How is my tone? Am I too overbearing or too firm? Do I need qualifiers?
• Have I identified common ground?
• Have I addressed differing points of view?
• Does my conclusion show the significance of my essay?
• Have I used key vocabulary words correctly to accurately represent my ideas on this topic?
Language
3. Apply knowledge of language to understand how language functions in different contexts, to make effective choices for meaning or style, and to comprehend more fully when reading or listening.
a. Vary syntax for effect, consulting references (e.g.,
Tufte’s Artful
Sentences) for guidance as needed; apply an understanding of syntax to the study of complex texts when reading.
Writing
1f. Use specific rhetorical devices to support assertions
(e.g., appeal to logic through reasoning; appeal to emotion or ethical belief; relate a personal anec-
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Considering Stylistic Choices
This section asks students if the style of their writing, including both word choice and sentence structure, is as effective as possible for its purpose and audience. Activity 25: Considering Stylistic Choices
Every choice you make as you write is stylistic. When you write a word, a phrase, or a sentence a certain way, that is your style. Since you are in complete control of this commodity, you can change your words and sentences to create certain effects that will be sure to reach your intended audience.
Answer the following questions about your writing style in this essay. Then decide if you want to make any changes to create a different effect.
• How will the language you have used affect your readers’ response? Are any references too harsh? Too mild? Or too sensitive for your audience? In other words, is your language appropriate for your intended audience?
• Which words or synonyms have you repeated? Are these effective repetitions?
Explain your answer.
• Did you use any figurative language? Why did you use it?
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Language
1. Demonstrate command of the conventions of standard
English grammar and usage when writing or speaking.
a. Apply the understanding that usage is a matter of convention, can change over time, and is sometimes contested. b. Resolve issues of complex or contested usage, consulting references (e.g.,
Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary of English Usage,
Garner’s Modern
American Usage) as needed.
2. Demonstrate command of the conventions of standard
English capitalization, punctuation, and spelling when writing. a. Observe hyphenation conventions.
b. Spell correctly.
Writing
5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by … editing, … (Editing for conventions should demonstrate command of Language standards 1–3 up to and including grades 11–12.)
• What effects will your choices of sentence structure and length have on the readers? • In what ways does your language convey your identity and character?
Quickwrite (5 minutes): What stylistic changes can I make in my essay to persuade my intended audience more effectively?
Editing the Draft
As students move closer to their final drafts, their essays take another large step toward reader-based prose. At this point, this means that for clear, effective communication to take place, students have to conform to the guidelines of standard written English.
•• In this case, students will benefit most from specific feedback from you or a tutor rather than from peer evaluation.
•• This work might be preceded by lessons on common errors in grammar, usage, punctuation, and mechanics that follow Part II (Editing) of the
Evaluation Form (Appendix X).
Activity 26: Editing the Draft
Edit your draft on the basis of the information you have received from your instructor or from a tutor. Use Part II of the Evaluation Form as an editing checklist. The following editing guidelines will also help you to edit your own work: • If possible, set your essay aside for 24 hours before rereading it to find errors.
• Read your essay aloud so you can hear your errors and rough spots.
• Focus on individual words and sentences rather than on the overall meaning.
Take a sheet of paper and cover everything except the line you are reading.
Then touch your pencil to each word as you read.
• With the help of your teacher, figure out your own pattern of errors—the most serious and frequent errors you make.
• Look for only one type of error at a time. Then go back and look for a second type and, if necessary, a third.
• Use a dictionary to check spelling and confirm that you have chosen the right word for the context.
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
dote, case study, or analogy). 2d. Use precise language, domainspecific vocabulary, and techniques such as metaphor, simile, and analogy to manage the complexity of the topic.
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Using the Evaluation Form Part II (at the end of the Assignment Template) for peer work, individual work, or conferences with you for the purpose of editing will give your students a consistent checklist for each writing task.
Beyond this appendix, students can consult either an Online Writing Lab
(OWL) or a grammar/usage handbook for explanations of any rules or conventions that confuse them. The Purdue Online Writing Lab is one of the best, most comprehensive resources available for editing. You also might consider marking your student papers exclusively for one skill at a time, letting the skills accumulate as the term progresses.
Writing
5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by … revising, editing, rewriting, or trying a new approach, focusing on addressing what is most significant for a specific purpose and audience.
Responding to Feedback
Students need feedback on their writing. Some of this can be from peers during the revision stage, but instructor feedback is essential. Although responding to drafts and conferencing with students is undoubtedly time consuming, it is important to intervene in the writing process at the most useful points and to make comments that are well-targeted both to the assignment’s demands and to the student’s needs and language development.
The most valuable point for students to receive feedback is before they revise and edit, so they can actively apply to the next draft what they learn from your response. One particularly effective time for you to respond is after students have produced their first revised, “reader-based” draft. Students can then use your feedback to revise and improve the final draft they will submit for a final grade.
Activity 27: Responding to Feedback
Based on the activities and quickwrites you have done in the revising and editing sections, make a list of changes you want to make in your essay. Review the criteria and explanations offered in these two segments. Then revise and edit your essay in a way that reflects what you learned about your draft in this final section.
The strategies in this section of the ERWC are designed to reinforce students’ learning of the content of the CCSS for ELA/Literacy in the preceding sections of the template.
Writing
10. Write routinely over extended time frames (time for research, reflection, and revision) and shorter time frames
(a single sitting or a day or two) for a range of tasks, purposes, and audiences.
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Reflecting on Your Writing Process
Reflection is an essential component in learning. Reflection allows students to articulate their attitudes and assumptions about literacy and the role it plays in their developing academic identities. Just before your students turn in their essays, a good practice is to ask them to reflect in writing on the process of writing their essays—which parts of the essays they want you to notice and what they learned from writing.
Activity 28: Reflecting on Your Writing
Reflecting on your writing is an essential part of improving on your next assignment. When you have completed your essay, answer these six questions and submit your thoughts with your final draft.
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
• What was easiest?
• By completing this assignment, what did you learn about arguing?
• What do you think are the strengths of your argument? Place a wavy line by the parts of your essay that you feel are very good.
• What are the weaknesses, if any, of your paper? Place an X by the parts of your essay you would like help with. Write any questions you have in the margin. • What have you learned from this assignment about your own writing process—about preparing to write, about writing the first draft, about revising, and about editing?
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
• What was most difficult about this assignment?
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
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CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Jim Crow Policing
By Bob Herbert
New York Times, February 2, 2010
The New York City Police Department needs to be restrained. The nonstop humiliation of young black and Hispanic New Yorkers, including children, by police officers who feel no obligation to treat them fairly or with any respect at all is an abomination. That many of the officers engaged in the mistreatment are black or Latino themselves is shameful.
2
Statistics will be out shortly about the total number of people who were stopped and frisked by the police in 2009. We already have the data for the first three-quarters of the year, and they are staggering. During that period, more than 450,000 people were stopped by the cops, an increase of 13 percent over the same period in 2008.
3
An overwhelming 84 percent of the stops in the first three-quarters of 2009 were of black or Hispanic New Yorkers. It is incredible how few of the stops yielded any law enforcement benefit. Contraband, which usually means drugs, was found in only 1.6 percent of the stops of black New Yorkers.
For Hispanics, it was just 1.5 percent. For whites, who are stopped far less frequently, contraband was found 2.2 percent of the time.
4
The percentages of stops that yielded weapons were even smaller. Weapons were found on just 1.1 percent of the blacks stopped, 1.4 percent of the
Hispanics, and 1.7 percent of the whites. Only about 6 percent of stops result in an arrest for any reason.
5
Rather than a legitimate crime-fighting tool, these stops are a despicable, racially oriented tool of harassment. And the police are using it at the increasingly enthusiastic direction of Mayor Michael Bloomberg and Police
Commissioner Ray Kelly.
6
There were more than a half-million stops in New York City in 2008, and when the final tally is in, we’ll find that the number only increased in 2009.
7
Not everyone who is stopped is frisked. When broken down by ethnic group, the percentages do not at first seem so wildly disproportionate. Some
59.4 percent of all Hispanics who were stopped were also frisked, as were
56.6 percent of blacks, and 46 percent of whites. But keep in mind, whites composed fewer than 16 percent of the people stopped in the first place.
8
These encounters with the police are degrading and often frightening, and the real number of people harassed is undoubtedly higher than the numbers reported by the police. Often the cops will stop, frisk and sometimes taunt people who are at their mercy, and then move on—without finding anything, making an arrest, or recording the encounter as they are supposed to.
9
Even the official reasons given by the police for the stops are laughably bogus.
People are stopped for allegedly making “furtive movements,” for wearing clothes “commonly used in a crime,” and, of course, for the “suspicious bulge.” My wallet, my notebook and my cellphone would all apply.
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READING SELECTIONS
1
The Center for Constitutional Rights has filed a class-action lawsuit against the city and the Police Department over the stops. Several plaintiffs detailed how their ordinary daily lives were interrupted by cops bent on harassment for no good reason. Lalit Carson was stopped while on a lunch break from his job as a teaching assistant at a charter school in the Bronx. Deon Dennis was stopped and searched while standing outside the apartment building in which he lives in Harlem. The police arrested him, allegedly because of an outstanding warrant. He was held for several hours then released. There was no outstanding warrant.
12
There are endless instances of this kind of madness. People going about their daily business, bothering no one, are menaced out of the blue by the police, forced to spread themselves face down in the street, or plaster themselves against a wall, or bend over the hood of a car, to be searched. People who object to the harassment are often threatened with arrest for disorderly conduct. 13
The Police Department insists that these stops of innocent people—which are unconstitutional, by the way—help fight crime. And they insist that the policy is not racist.
14
Paul Browne, the chief spokesman for Commissioner Kelly, described the stops as “life-saving.” And he has said repeatedly that the racial makeup of the people stopped and frisked is proportionally similar to the racial makeup of people committing crimes.
15
That is an amazingly specious argument. The fact that a certain percentage of criminals may be black or Hispanic is no reason for the police to harass individuals from those groups when there is no indication whatsoever that they have done anything wrong.
16
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The police say they also stop people for wearing “inappropriate attire for the season.” I saw a guy on the Upper West Side wearing shorts and sandals a couple weeks ago. That was certainly unusual attire for the middle of January, but it didn’t cross my mind that he should be accosted by the police.
11
READING SELECTIONS
10
It’s time to put an end to Jim Crow policing in New York City.
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CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Racial Profiling
Developed by Kim Flachmann
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Reading Selection for this Module:
Herbert, Bob. “Jim Crow Policing.” New York Times 2 Feb. 2010, late ed.: A27. Print.
Reading Rhetorically
Prereading
Activity 1
Getting Ready to Read
The following article, “Jim Crow Policing” by Bob Herbert, was first published in the New York Times on February 2, 2010. It tries to persuade its readers that law-enforcement agents should not take any action on the basis of race alone. It uses a combination of logic and emotion to achieve its purpose. Have you ever been stopped by the police because of your appearance? If you have, what was your reaction? If you haven’t, what do you think your reaction would be?
Why do you think you would react this way?
Quickwrite: What do you know about racial profiling? What do you think about it? Write for five minutes. Then discuss your response with a partner.
Activity 2
Exploring Key Concepts
Understanding key concepts in a reading selection is essential to good comprehension, so that is where we are going to start the reading process. Complete the following activities before moving on.
Jim Crow Policing
Look up “Jim Crow” on the Internet.
•
What does the term have to do with race?
•
Is the reference positive or negative?
•
What is its origin?
39
•
What do you think this reference might have to do with police activities? Now go to the PBS page called “The Rise and Fall of Jim Crow,” and read four of the Jim Crow stories. Be prepared to retell one of them to the class.
Other Key Concepts
Below are some important concepts from Herbert’s essay. Write down your personal associations with these terms. Then complete the activity that follows.
•
race
•
prejudice
•
ethnic
•
discrimination
•
profiling
•
stereotyping
Complete a “cubing” activity for four of the words listed above. For this exercise, fill in all the squares below for each of the words you choose. Describe it:
Compare it:
What are its colors, shapes, sizes, smells, tastes, sounds?
What is it similar to?
Associate it:
Analyze it:
What does it make you think of?
How is it made?
Apply it:
Argue for it or against it:
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
What can you do with it?
How can it be used?
Activity 3
Surveying the Text
Surveying your reading material (no matter what its length) will give you an overview of what it is about and how it is put together. To learn how to survey an essay, answer the following questions.
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CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
1. Who is the author of this essay?
2. When and where was this essay published?
3. What proper nouns do you notice in this essay?
4. What do you think the essay will discuss?
Activity 4
Making Predictions and Asking Questions
Making predictions about your reading will help you read actively rather than passively. Active reading promotes learning. Your answers to the following questions will guide you through the process. 1. What do you think this essay is going to be about?
2. What do you think is the purpose of this essay?
3. Who do you think is the intended audience for this piece? What brings you to this conclusion?
4. What do you think the writer wants the reader to do or believe?
5. On the basis of the title and other features of the selection, what information or ideas might this essay present?
6. Do you think the writer will be negative or positive in relation to the topic? How did you come to this conclusion?
7. What argument about the topic might the article present? What makes you think so?
8. Turn the title into a question (or questions) for you to answer after you have read the essay.
Activity 5
Understanding Key Vocabulary
•
abomination (par. 1): an object that is intensely disliked
•
contraband (par. 3): illegal imports
•
despicable (par. 5): horrible
•
degrading (par. 8): humiliating
•
unconstitutional (par. 13): illegal
•
specious (par. 15): false
Explain how each of these words is related to one of the key concepts introduced earlier in “Exploring Key Concepts.”
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
The following vocabulary words are important to your understanding of this essay, so the definitions are provided for you:
Reading
Activity 6
Reading for Understanding
We all process reading material differently. No one way is better than another. To demonstrate the variety of approaches to this essay, read it aloud, and talk about your responses to the following questions:
1. Which of your predictions turned out to be true?
2. What surprised you?
3. Are you persuaded by the text?
4. If a prediction was inaccurate, what in the text misled you?
5. Can you answer the question you created from the title?
6. What in the essay is confusing to you?
Activity 7
Considering the Structure of the Text
Learning more about the structure of the text will give you a better understanding of the writer’s approach to its content. Your work on this activity will help you understand the text’s structure as you apply it to your own writing.
Making Discoveries
Working in pairs, create a picture outline showing how this essay is structured. Talk with your partner until you have negotiated a graphic outline that represents how the essay is laid out.
Find another pair, and compare your graphics:
•
How are they different?
•
How are they the same?
•
What major discovery did you make from this exercise?
Descriptive Outlining
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Now follow these directions on the essay itself:
•
•
Draw lines throughout the body of the text that break the text into meaningful segments.
•
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Draw a line across the page where the conclusion begins.
•
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Draw a line across the page where the introduction ends.
Then, for each of your segments, label in the left margin its content (what is says).
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
•
Then, in the right margin label the rhetorical purpose of each segment (why the writer included it in the essay).
Analyzing Your Findings
Before moving on, discuss the following questions as a class:
•
•
How do you suspect each section will affect the readers?
•
What is the writer trying to accomplish in each section?
•
Which section is most developed?
•
Which section is least developed?
•
Why do you think the author made these choices?
•
Activity 8
What is the rhetorical purpose of each section you marked?
On the basis of your descriptive outline of the text, what do you think is the writer’s main claim or argument?
Noticing Language
Herbert uses two patterns that are especially effective in his essays:
(1) the passive voice and (2) word repetition.
The passive voice is applied to a verb in a sentence when the “doer” or actual “agent” of the action is after the verb in a “by” phrase or completely missing rather than before the verb. Also, a passive verb always includes a form of “be” and a past participle.
Examples: “is practiced,” “was frisked,” “has been stopped”
Agents can be added to a passive verb in a “by” phrase.
Passive: Racial profiling is practiced in New York (by the police).
Active: Police practice racial profiling in New York.
Herbert starts his essay with a sentence in the passive voice:
“The New York City Police Department needs to be restrained” [by whom?]. What other passive verbs do you see in this essay? What effect does this linguistic pattern have on you as a reader?
Notice that all the sentences after paragraph 12 are in the active voice. What effect does this shift from passive to active voice have on the message that Herbert is delivering?
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Writers often use the passive when they don’t know or don’t want to reveal the agent or “doer” of their action. Herbert relies heavily on the passive in his essay because in most cases he often doesn’t know who was responsible for the action he is calling into question.
In this essay, Herbert also repeats specific words that capture the readers’ attention and keep the focus on these particular concepts.
Two examples are stop and frisk, which are repeated throughout the essay. Find three other words or parts of words that Herbert repeats in this essay. What is the effect of these repetitions?
Activity 9
Rereading the Text
As you read the essay again, do the following tasks:
•
Record the essay’s thesis.
•
State the thesis as a question.
•
Highlight the details throughout the essay that directly answer the question you have written.
•
On your copy of the essay, label the following points in the lefthand margin:
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Examples given by the author
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The author’s main arguments
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Activity 10
The issue or problem the author is writing about
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•
The introduction
The conclusion
In the right-hand margin, write your reactions to what the author is saying.
Analyzing Stylistic Choices
Answer the following questions about the words and sentences in this essay to help you understand how the linguistic choices the author has made create certain effects for readers.
Words
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
1. What does the term “racial profiling” bring to mind for you?
Which other words refer to this term—either directly or indirectly? 2. Why do you think Herbert makes these different references to racial profiling?
3. This essay has several strong words that draw on readers’ emotions. Circle the words that are the most highly charged and be prepared to explain your choices. Why does Herbert use these highly charged words? What effect do they have?
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Sentences
1. Is the author’s sentence structure mostly varied or not? What effect does the variety or lack of variety have on the essay?
2. Are the sentences readable? Explain your answer.
3. What effect are Herbert’s sentences likely to have on his readers?
Postreading
Activity 11
Summarizing and Responding
Complete both of the activities below to make sure you understand how to summarize effectively.
Summarizing
The act of summarizing asks you to put someone else’s ideas into your own words, which will improve your understanding of those ideas. Using your previous notes and annotations, work in groups of three or four to summarize the essay’s main points in no more than five sentences. Then generate five questions that might serve as the basis of a class discussion. Use at least five vocabulary words from this module in your summary.
Responding
Turn your questions in to your teacher, who will choose some for class discussion.
Activity 12
Thinking Critically—Logos, Ethos, Pathos
The following questions and activities will help you gain a deeper understanding of the Herbert essay. Answer the following questions as thoroughly as you can, choosing evidence from the reading selection to support your answer.
Questions about Logic (Logos)
2. What support does the author provide for these assertions?
3. Can you think of counterarguments the author does not deal with?
4. Do you think the author has left something out on purpose? Why?
Questions about the Writer (Ethos)
1. Does this author have the right background to speak with authority on this subject?
2. Is this author knowledgeable? Smart? Successful?
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
1. What are two major claims the author makes in this essay?
3. What does the author’s style and language tell you about him?
4. Do you trust this author? Why or why not?
5. Do you think this author is deceptive? Why or why not?
6. Do you think this author is serious? Explain your answer.
Questions about Emotions (Pathos)
1. Does this piece affect you emotionally? Which parts?
2. Do you think the author is trying to manipulate readers’ emotions? How?
3. Do your emotions conflict with your logical interpretation of the arguments? 4. Does the author use humor? How does that affect your acceptance of the author’s ideas?
PAPA Square
Activity 13
Now that you have answered the questions in Activity 12, you will analyze these issues further by completing a PAPA Square and a quickwrite. The rhetorical appeals of logos, ethos, and pathos form the basis of rhetorical analysis in this module. A PAPA Square will help you analyze these appeals in your reading and can be used in turn in your own writing. To apply this exercise to your reading, answer the questions around the outside of the box in reference to the essay. In the center, identify the stylistic devices and logical, emotional, and ethical appeals the writer uses to persuade his or her audience. Now fill in the PAPA Square for the Herbert essay.
Purpose
(What is the writer’s purpose?)
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Audience
(Who is the audience?) Rhetorical Methods and Strategies
Logical Appeals
Argument
(What is the thesis or argument?) Pathetic Appeals
Ethical Appeals
Stylistic Devices
Persona
(What is the author’s persona or public image?)
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Quickwrite (five minutes)
Choose one of the following topics and write for five minutes:
1. What does this writer want us to believe?
2. What is your response to one of the author’s main ideas?
Activity 14
Reflecting on Your Reading Process
Respond to the following questions in a quickwrite:
•
What have you learned so far from joining the conversation on this topic?
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What do you still want to learn next?
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What reading strategies did you use or learn in this module?
Which strategies will you use in reading other texts? How will these strategies apply to your work in other classes?
•
In what ways has your ability to read and discuss texts like this one improved?
Connecting Reading to Writing
Discovering What You Think
Activity 15
Considering the Writing Task
Reading the assignment carefully to make sure you address all aspects of the prompt is important.
Write an essay that presents your opinion on a controversial issue of your choice. Consult various media sources if you need some ideas. Begin with a debatable thesis statement. Then follow the guidelines for writing an argument essay. As you write your essay, be sure you support your claims with well-chosen evidence.
If something in the media (such as a newspaper article, ad, or speech) inspired this assignment, attach a copy to your paper before you turn it in.
Take the following steps for this exercise:
•
Read the assignment carefully.
•
Decide which issue you are going to discuss.
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Discuss the purpose of the assignment (what will you try to accomplish in writing your essay?).
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Writing Task
Activity 16
Taking a Stance
Taking a stance on your topic at this point in the writing process is essential. This involves developing a tentative thesis statement and then “trying on” different perspectives within that framework. The two activities in this section will guide you to a position on your topic. Developing a Tentative Thesis Statement
To begin this process, read as many different perspectives on your topic as you can find. As you read, settle on what you think your stance will be. Then answer the following questions:
1. What specific question will your essay answer? What is your response to this question? (This is your tentative thesis.)
2. What support have you found for your thesis?
3. What evidence have you found for this support (for example, facts, statistics, statements from authorities, personal stories, and examples)? 4. How much background information do your readers need to understand your topic and thesis?
5. If readers were to disagree with your thesis or the validity of your support, what would they say? How would you address their concerns (what would you say to them)?
Developing a tentative thesis now will help you take a stand on the issue you have chosen to write about. Your thesis should be a complete sentence that includes your topic and your opinion on that topic. It can be revised several times, but will ultimately keep your writing on track. Draft a possible thesis for your essay now.
Trying on Words, Perspectives, and Ideas
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Before you actually write a draft, identify two perspectives that would disagree with your stand on the issue. Take on their perspectives, and draft a quickwrite from each of their stances.
Activity 17
Gathering Evidence to Support Your Claims
As you begin to choose evidence that will support your claims, you must be able to evaluate that information. From your previous work, list the information you are considering using to prove your point. For each item on your list, write down your responses to the following questions:
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How does the piece of evidence support your claim?
Is it a fact or opinion? If it is an opinion, what facts can you find to support it?
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Will the evidence be persuasive to your audience?
Now put a check mark by the items that will serve as good evidence based on these criteria.
Activity 18
Getting Ready to Write
The following exercise will help you move from reading to writing.
Once you have chosen a controversial issue and gathered some evidence, you need to fold in your own thoughts and ideas. Either by brainstorming (listing) or freewriting (writing your thoughts down in prose as fast as they occur), respond to the following questions:
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What is the exact issue?
•
Why is it important?
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Do people care about it?
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What is most important about this issue?
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What are some other points of view on this topic?
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How do you think the issue should be resolved?
Writing Rhetorically
Entering the Conversation
Activity 19
Composing a Draft
When you write an argument essay, choose a subject that matters to you. If you have strong feelings, you will find it much easier to gather evidence and convince your readers of your point of view.
Keep in mind, however, that your readers might feel just as strongly about the opposite side of the issue. Use the following guidelines to help you write your argument:
To write a thesis statement for an argument essay, you will need to take a stand for or against an action or an idea. In other words, your thesis statement must be debatable—a statement that can be argued or challenged and that will not be met with agreement by everyone who reads it. Your thesis statement introduces your subject and states your opinion about that subject.
Bob Herbert’s thesis is his first sentence: “The New York City
Police Department needs to be restrained.” This is a debatable thesis. Some other statements on the topic of ethnic profiling would not be good thesis statements:
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1. State your opinion on the topic in your thesis statement.
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Not debatable: Ethnic profiling by law-enforcement authorities in the United States often involves minorities.
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Not debatable: Some law-enforcement agencies have strict rules regarding racial profiling.
Herbert sets up his essay with some facts about racial profiling and several references to the practice in New York of stopping and frisking blacks and Hispanics. This background information expands upon his thesis statement.
2. Find out as much as you can about your audience before you write.
Knowing your readers’ backgrounds and feelings on your topic will help you choose the best supporting evidence and examples. Suppose that you want to convince people in two different age groups to quit smoking. You might tell the group of teenagers that cigarettes make their breath rancid, their teeth yellow, and their clothes smelly. But with a group of adults, you might discuss the horrifying statistics on lung and heart disease associated with long-term smoking.
Herbert’s essay was first published in the New York Times, which addresses a fairly educated audience. The original readers probably thought much like he does on this issue. So he chose his support as if he were talking to people who agree with him.
3. Choose evidence that supports your thesis statement.
Evidence is definitely the most important factor in writing an argument essay. Without solid evidence, your essay is nothing more than opinion; with it, your essay can be powerful and persuasive. If you supply convincing evidence, your readers will not only understand your position but perhaps agree with it.
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Evidence can consist of facts, statistics, statements from authorities, personal stories, or examples. Personal stories and examples can be based on your own observations, experiences, and reading, but your opinions are not evidence. Other strategies, such as comparison/contrast, definition, and cause/effect, can be particularly useful in building an argument. Use any combination of evidence and writing strategies that supports your thesis statement.
In his essay, Herbert uses several different types of evidence.
Here are some examples:
Facts
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The Center for Constitutional Rights filed a class-action lawsuit against New York and the police department (par. 11).
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Not everyone who is stopped is frisked (par. 7).
Paul Browne is the chief spokesman for Commissioner Kelly
(par. 14).
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Statistics
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In 2009, 450,000 people were stopped by cops (par. 2).
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84 percent of the stops were black and Hispanic (par. 3).
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Contraband was found in 1.6 percent of the black cases, 1.5 percent of the Hispanic, and 1.5 percent of the white (par. 3).
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Weapons were found on 1.1 percent of the blacks, 1.4 percent of the Hispanics, 1.7 percent of the whites (par. 4).
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Police stopped more than a half million people in 2008 (par. 6)
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Of those stopped, 59.4 percent of the Hispanics were frisked,
56.6 percent of blacks, and 46 percent of whites (par. 7).
Statements from Authorities
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Center for Constitutional Rights (par. 11)
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Police Department (par. 13)
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Paul Browne (par. 14)
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Police Commissioner Kelly (par. 14)
Personal Stories and Examples
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The story about Lalit Carson (par. 11)
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The story about Deon Dennis (par. 11)
4. Anticipate opposing points of view.
In paragraph 14, Herbert acknowledges as opposition a statement made by Paul Browne on behalf of Police Commissioner Kelly.
Browne feels the stops are “life-saving.” By acknowledging this statement, Herbert raises his credibility. He then goes on to refute
Browne’s claim in the next paragraph.
5. Find some common ground.
Pointing out common ground between you and your opponent is also an effective strategy. “Common ground” refers to points of agreement between two opposing positions. For example, one person might be in favor of gun control and another strongly opposed. But they might find common ground—agreement—in the need to keep guns out of teenagers’ hands. Locating some
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
In addition to stating and supporting your position, anticipating and responding to opposing views are important. Presenting only your side of the argument leaves half the story untold—the opposition’s half. If you acknowledge that there are opposing arguments and address them, your argument will be more convincing. common ground is possible in almost every situation. When you state in your essay that you agree with your opponent on certain points, your reader sees you as a fair person.
Herbert assumes that most of his readers know that ethnic profiling by law-enforcement agencies is going on around the country. His job, then, is to prove the extent and unfairness of it.
6. Maintain a reasonable tone.
Just as you probably wouldn’t win an argument by shouting or making mean or nasty comments, don’t expect your readers to respond well to such tactics. Keep the “voice” of your essay calm and sensible. Your readers will be much more open to what you have to say if they think you are a reasonable person.
Herbert maintains a reasonable tone throughout his essay.
Every now and then, he is aggressive—“Racial profiling . . . is an abomination” (par. 1)—and even sarcastic—a “suspicious bulge”
(par. 9). But even when he quotes some unbelievable statistics, as he does in paragraphs 2 through 4, he keeps his voice under control and, therefore, earns the respect of his readers.
Activity 20
Considering Structure
All essays should have a beginning, a middle, and an end. This is true of writing in all disciplines. An argument essay has these same divisions with a few more features that will communicate your stance and present your claims as clearly as possible. Since you want your audience to agree with you by the end of your essay, you need to organize it in such a way that your readers can easily follow it. The guidelines in this section will help you organize the material you have gathered into a coherent essay.
The first outline shows the order in which the features of an argument essay are most effective:
Introduction
1. Background information
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
2. Introduction of the subject
3. Statement of your opinion
Body Paragraphs
1. Common ground
2. Lots of evidence (logical and emotional)
3. Opposing points of view
4. Response to the opposing points of view
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Conclusion
1. Restatement of your position
2. Call for action or agreement
Bob Herbert’s essay follows the general outline just presented. Here is a skeleton outline of his essay:
Introduction
1. Background information about racial profiling in New York City
2. Subject introduced
3. Statement of opinion
Body Paragraphs
1. Evidence: Statistics (par. 2-7)
2. Common ground: Humiliation, fear (par. 8)
3. More background: Reasons for stops (par. 9-10)
4. More evidence: Personal narratives (par. 11-12)
5. Opposing points of view: Police department, Paul Browne (par.
13-14)
6. Response to the opposing points of view: logical and emotional response (par. 15)
Conclusion
1. Restatement of the solution (par. 16)
The arrangement of your evidence in an argument essay depends to a great extent on your readers’ opinions. Most arguments will be organized from general to particular, from particular to general, or from one extreme to another. When you know that your readers already agree with you, arranging your details from general to particular or from most to least important is usually the most effective approach. Using this order, you build on your readers’ agreement and loyalty as you explain your thinking on the subject.
If you suspect that your audience does not agree with you, reverse the organization of your evidence and arrange it from particular to general or from least to most important. In this way, you can take your readers step by step through your reasoning in an attempt to get them to agree with you.
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
2. Call to action (par. 16)
Organize your essay in a way that represents what you just learned in this section. Then draw horizontal lines through your essay to distinguish its beginning, middle, and end. Finally, label the key features of your argument by using the terms from the first outline in this section.
Activity 21
Using the Words of Others
One of the most important features of academic writing is the use of words and ideas from written sources to support your own points.
Essentially, there are three ways to incorporate words and ideas from sources into your own writing:
1. Direct quotation. Bob Herbert says, “The nonstop humiliation of young black and Hispanic New Yorkers, including children, by police officers who feel no obligation to treat them fairly or with any respect at all is an abomination” (par. 1).
2. Paraphrase. In “Jim Crow Policing,” Bob Herbert notes that racial profiling in New York of black and Hispanic citizens is humiliating and unfair (par. 1).
This is a paraphrase of the quotation in #1; you can also paraphrase an entire article by putting it in your own words.
3. Summary. In “Jim Crow Policing,” Bob Herbert cites statistics and stories from New York City to prove that racial profiling is extensive and unjust. The New York Police Commissioner claims that these “stops” are “life-saving.” But according to the statistics the author provides, too often innocent citizens are harassed and the stops are unwarranted (par. 1).
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
In-Text Citation. MLA documentation style also requires in-text citations for every direct quotation, indirect quotation, paraphrase, or summary.
If the author’s name is given in the text, the page number should be furnished in parentheses at the end of the sentence containing the material. If the author’s name is not provided in your essay, put the author’s name and page number in parentheses after the material.
Practice with Sources. Choose two passages from the reading selection that you might be able to use in your essay. First, write down each passage as a correctly punctuated direct quotation. Second, paraphrase the material in your own words. Finally, respond to the idea expressed in the passage by agreeing or disagreeing with it and explaining why. Now you are ready to use this material in an essay.
Activity 22
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Negotiating Voices
One strategy to help you mark the separate voices in an essay that you write is to use clear introductory language, such as the following templates or sentence frames:
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General Purpose Frames
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The issue of ______ can be viewed from several different perspectives. •
Experts disagree on what to do about ______.
To Introduce the Words of Experts
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Noted researcher John Q. Professor argues that _______.
•
In a groundbreaking article, Hermando H. Scientist states that
________.
•
According to Patricia A. Politician ________.
To Introduce Contrary Views
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However, the data presented by Hermando H. Scientist show
________.
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On the other hand, Terry T. Teacher believes ________.
To Introduce Your Own Views
•
Although some argue for ________, others argue for _______. In my view ________.
•
Though researchers disagree, clearly ________.
Identifying Model Language
Return to the article you read by Bob Herbert, and underline all the quotations and paraphrases in the essay. Based on the model above, explain how two of these are introduced and distinguished from other perspectives and quotations in the essay.
Now consider the evidence in the essay you are writing, and use these models to write one example for each of these categories
(General Purpose, To Introduce the Words of Experts, To Introduce
Contrary Views, and To Introduce Your Own Views). Use the samples above as models only, and create a frame that fits into the context for your essay.
Revising and Editing
Activity 23
Revising Rhetorically—Rhetorical Analysis
A rhetorical analysis of an essay requires you to assess writing based on the purpose of the writing, the message of the argument, the needs of the audience, and the persona the writer adopts. The following questions will get you started on a rhetorical revision:
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Using Model Language
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What is the rhetorical situation? Who is my audience, and what is my purpose?
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What types of appeals (logical or emotional) will be most effective with this audience?
•
How can I establish my own authority on this issue? What credibility do I have with this audience?
Just as it did in your reading, a PAPA Square can help you analyze the rhetorical strategies in your own writing. To apply this exercise to your writing, answer the questions around the outside of the box in reference to your own essay. In the center, identify the stylistic devices and logical, emotional, and ethical appeals you use to persuade your audience.
Fill in the PAPA Square below for your essay.
Purpose
(What is the writer’s purpose?)
Audience
(Who is the audience?) Rhetorical Methods and Strategies
Logical Appeals
Argument
(What is the thesis or argument?) Pathetic Appeals
Ethical Appeals
Stylistic Devices
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Persona
(What is the author’s persona or public image?)
Quickwrite (5 minutes): What did you learn about your essay from this analysis? Write freely and openly about the role of the appeals in your essay, your persona, your audience, and your purpose. Do you think this essay will persuade your readers?
Activity 24
Revision Workshop
Now that you have assessed your essay from your perspective, it is time to share it with some classmates.
Peer Group Work
Working in groups of three or four, read your essay aloud to the other members of the group. Then use Part I of the Evaluation Form provided by your teacher as a revising checklist for each essay.
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Paired Work
Work in pairs to decide how you will revise the problems that group members identified.
Individual Work
Revise the draft based on the feedback you have received and the decisions you have made with your partners. Consider the following questions as revision guidelines for your individual work:
•
•
What is my purpose for this essay?
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What should I keep? Which parts are the most effective?
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What should I add? Where do I need more details, examples, and other evidence to support my point?
•
What could I delete? Do I use irrelevant details? Am I repetitive?
•
What should I change? Are parts of my essay confusing or contradictory? Do I need to explain my ideas more fully?
•
What should I rethink? Is my position clear? Have I provided enough analysis to convince my readers?
•
How is my tone? Am I too overbearing or too firm? Do I need qualifiers? •
Have I identified common ground?
•
Have I addressed differing points of view?
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Does my conclusion show the significance of my essay?
•
Have I used key vocabulary words correctly to accurately represent my ideas on this topic?
Considering Stylistic Choices
Every choice you make as you write is stylistic. When you write a word, a phrase, or a sentence a certain way, that is your style. Since you are in complete control of this commodity, you can change your words and sentences to create certain effects that will be sure to reach your intended audience.
Answer the following questions about your writing style in this essay. Then decide if you want to make any changes to create a different effect.
•
How will the language you have used affect your readers’ response? Are any references too harsh? Too mild? Or too sensitive for your audience? In other words, is your language appropriate for your intended audience?
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Activity 25
Have I responded to the assignment?
•
Which words or synonyms have you repeated? Are these effective repetitions? Explain your answer.
•
Did you use any figurative language? Why did you use it?
•
What effects will your choices of sentence structure and length have on the readers?
•
In what ways does your language convey your identity and character? Quickwrite (5 minutes): What stylistic changes can I make in my essay to persuade my intended audience more effectively?
Activity 26
Editing the Draft
Edit your draft on the basis of the information you have received from your instructor or from a tutor. Use Part II of the Evaluation
Form as an editing checklist. The following editing guidelines will also help you to edit your own work:
Read your essay aloud so you can hear your errors and rough spots. •
Focus on individual words and sentences rather than on the overall meaning. Take a sheet of paper and cover everything except the line you are reading. Then touch your pencil to each word as you read.
•
With the help of your teacher, figure out your own pattern of errors—the most serious and frequent errors you make.
•
Look for only one type of error at a time. Then go back and look for a second type and, if necessary, a third.
•
Activity 27
If possible, set your essay aside for 24 hours before rereading it to find errors.
•
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
•
Use a dictionary to check spelling and confirm that you have chosen the right word for the context.
Responding to Feedback
Based on the activities and quickwrites you have done in the revising and editing sections, make a list of changes you want to make in your essay. Review the criteria and explanations offered in these two segments. Then revise and edit your essay in a way that reflects what you learned about your draft in this final section.
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Activity 28
Reflecting on Your Writing Process
Reflecting on your writing is an essential part of improving on your next assignment. When you have completed your essay, answer these six questions and submit your thoughts with your final draft.
What was most difficult about this assignment?
•
What was easiest?
•
By completing this assignment, what did you learn about arguing? •
What do you think are the strengths of your argument? Place a wavy line by the parts of your essay that you feel are very good.
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What are the weaknesses, if any, of your paper? Place an X by the parts of your essay you would like help with. Write any questions you have in the margin.
•
What have you learned from this assignment about your own writing process—about preparing to write, about writing the first draft, about revising, and about editing?
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
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Rhetorical Grammar for
Expository Reading and Writing
Developed by Roberta Ching
TEACHER VERSION
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Passives and Modals
Focus: Writers often can make choices about how they direct a reader’s attention. In constructing arguments, they want the reader to focus on the most important element in the sentence. Making choices about using passive or active construction gives writers that control. Writers also use modals to make sure that their assertions can be defended and to make recommendations.
Alignment with Standards: The Rhetorical Grammar
Concepts and activities in this unit align with both
California’s Common Core State Standards for English
Language Arts and Literacy and the California English
Language Development Standards. The activities in this unit are designed to provide students with command of the grammar and usage conventions of academic English.
Students analyze how language functions in different contexts and how writers make grammatical choices that are appropriate for their purpose and audience. After analyzing language structures in the texts of others, students apply this knowledge to edit their own writing by using language resources such as varying verb tenses, expanding verb and noun phrases, modifying to add details, combining clauses to link ideas, and using cohesion devices to create arguments that are coherent and persuasive.
AT A GLANCE
Guided Composition
Activity 1
Rhetorical Grammar
Instruction
Passive Verbs
Activity 2
Activity 3
Modals
Activity 4
Activity 5
Editing Student Writing
Editing to Student Writing
Activity 6
Editing Your Guided
Composition
Activity 7
Editing Your Own Writing
Activity 8
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RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Guided Composition
The following activity should be introduced before you move on to Exploring Key Concepts in the module, Racial Profiling. You will need to save your students’ guided compositions from Activity 1 for
Activity 7, Editing Your Guided Composition.
Guided Composition
The purpose of this guided composition activity is to elicit a paragraph of student writing on the topic of racial profiling. You can informally diagnose your students’ strengths and weaknesses in the area of use of the passive voice and qualifying words and structures. At the end of the unit, students will edit their paragraphs, applying what they have learned from the chapter. Students will then compare their paragraphs with the original, paying particular attention to the use of the passive and qualifying words and structures.
1. Instruct your students to listen as you read the following paragraph at a normal rate of speed. Then ask them to take notes while you read the paragraph again; emphasize that the notes will be essential when they write their paragraphs. Alternatively, write a series of key words or phrases on the board to guide your students.
2. Ask your students to reconstruct what they heard using their notes or the key words. Students should compare with each other what they have written and make changes as necessary.
3. Collect the paragraphs at the end of the activity, and save them. You will return them to your students to edit at the end of the chapter.
4. Discuss the “Noticing Language” sentences.
Paragraph to read:
According to Bob Herbert, New York police officers need to be restrained from using ethnic profiling. During the first three-quarters of 2009, 450,000 people in New York were stopped by the cops. An overwhelming 84% who were stopped were black or Hispanic. Contraband, usually drugs, was found in just 1.6% of the stops of blacks and 1.4% of Hispanics. Weapons were found in even fewer stops. The real number of people who are harassed is undoubtedly higher. People are stopped for making furtive movements or wearing “inappropriate attire for the season.” People going about their daily business are menaced out of the blue by the police. Lalit Carson was stopped on his lunch break from his job as a teaching assistant. A class-action lawsuit has been filed against the city by The Center for Constitutional Rights. It is time to put an end to Jim Crow policing in New York City.
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This activity is based on Bob Herbert, “Jim Crow Policing”
The purpose of this activity is for you to write a paragraph on the topic of this module. Your teacher will read a paragraph while you listen, and then read it again while you take notes. You will then write your own paragraph based on what you heard using your notes.
Noticing Language
Who is responsible for the actions in the following sentences?
1. Ethnic profiling is practiced throughout the country.
You can’t tell because the sentence doesn’t tell you who practices ethnic profiling.
Is it the police? Or the government?
2. Not everyone who is stopped is frisked.
You can’t tell, but you can guess it is the police because that’s who frisks people.
3. Deon Dennis was stopped and searched outside his apartment building in
Harlem.
You can’t tell, but it’s probably the New York City police since Harlem is in
Manhattan.
4. People are threatened with arrest for disorderly conduct if they object.
You can’t tell. It could be the police, and the police could be anywhere. We can’t tell if they are in New York.
Rhetorical Grammar Instruction
Integrate the rhetorical grammar instruction for Activities 2-5 into the Reading, Postreading, and
Connecting Reading to Writing portions of the module, as appropriate for your students’ needs. Each rhetorical grammar activity should take approximately 10 to 20 minutes.
Passive Verbs
Preparation for Activities 2 and 3
As you help students to understand how to form and use passive verbs, be sure to emphasize that the choice about whether or not to use a passive verb depends on the writer’s rhetorical purpose. A good writer of an expository essay knows when to use a passive verb effectively; however, inexperienced writers often use passives without having a clear reason, making their arguments less precise and convincing than they should be.
To prepare students to do the activities in this section, consider going over the sample sentences below on the topic of racial profiling with the whole class and eliciting explanations from the students. Adjust the amount of instruction you provide according to how much students already know.
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Activity 1: Guided Composition
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts
Note: The materials labeled Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts are for your reference as you plan instruction for this unit. Your students have an abbreviated version of these concepts in their materials. Forming the Passive
•• A passive verb always includes a form of be plus the participle of the verb.
(A participle is the -ed or -en form of the verb.)
Examples: is practiced, was arrested, have been taken
•• In general, only verbs that have a direct object (transitive verbs) can occur in the passive. A direct object is a noun or pronoun that names the receiver or the object of the verb’s action. direct object
Active: The police stopped blacks and Hispanics based on their race.
Passive: Blacks and Hispanics were stopped by the police based on their race.
The “doer” of the action in an active sentence is the subject. In a passive sentence, the “doer” is called the agent and is expressed in a prepositional phrase with by. Often the agent is omitted.
“doer” = subject
Active: The officer stopped the young man for suspicious attire.
“doer” = agent
Passive: The motorist was stopped (by the officer) for suspicious attire.
Activity 2: Identifying Passive Verbs
For this activity, do the example sentence with your students before asking them to complete the rest independently. Rather than correcting the activities, you may want to have students work in pairs to arrive at a consensus while you circulate to answer questions. Then ask pairs to share their answers with the class, at which point you can provide feedback and correct misunderstandings.
Activity 2: Identifying Passive Verbs
Underline the subjects and double-underline the passive verbs or verb phrase in the guided composition. Put (parentheses) around the “by” phrases that indicate the agent.
1. According to Bob Herbert, New York police officers need to be restrained from using ethnic profiling.
2. During the first three-quarters of 2009, 450,000 people in New York were stopped (by the cops).
3. Blacks and Hispanics were stopped much more often than whites.
4. Contraband, usually drugs, was found in just 1.6% of the stops of blacks and 1.4% of Hispanics.
5. Weapons were found in even fewer stops.
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7. People going about their daily business are menaced out of the blue (by the police). 8. Lalit Carson was stopped on his lunch break from his job as a teaching assistant. 9. A class-action lawsuit has been filed against the city (by The Center for
Constitutional Rights). It is time to put an end to Jim Crow policing in
New York City.
Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts
Changing Active Verbs to Passive Verbs
In most cases, writers use active verbs to make clear who or what is performing the action of the sentence. Sometimes writers use passive verbs to avoid assigning responsibility, as in the phrase, “Mistakes were made but not by me.” In this sentence, we don’t know who made the mistakes.
Generally, writing that uses active verbs will be stronger and clearer. However, sometimes writers use the passive intentionally. Below are three reasons for using passive verbs.
1. Use the passive when the agent or “doer” of the action is not known, not important, is obvious, or it is not necessary to name the agent.
Example: John was arrested for loitering.
(The agent is obvious—when someone is arrested, it is generally by the police— so the writer doesn’t choose to express the agent.)
2. Use the passive when the receiver of the action is the subject rather than the agent of the action. As a result, the focus of the sentence will be on the receiver of the action, not the agent.
Example: Many African Americans and Hispanics have been stopped simply because of their race.
(The writer has put African Americans and Hispanics in the foreground by making them the subject of the sentence. The agent is not specified, although we can infer it is the police.)
3. Use the passive to avoid the informality of using the impersonal you or they. Examples
Active: You should not stop innocent people based on their race.
Passive: Innocent people should not be stopped based on their race.
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6. People are stopped for making furtive movements or wearing
“inappropriate attire for the season.”
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Activity 3: Changing Active Verbs to Passive Verbs
For this activity, do the example sentence with your students before asking them to complete the rest independently. Rather than correcting the activities, you may want to have students work in pairs to arrive at a consensus while you circulate to answer questions. Then ask pairs to share their answers with the class, at which point you can provide feedback and correct misunderstandings.
Activity 3: Changing Active Verbs to Passive Verbs
Rewrite the following sentences from active to passive and indicate how the focus of the sentence changes. If you include the agent in your rewrite, put the “by” phrase in parentheses. Talk with a partner about why a writer might choose one focus instead of the other for each sentence. Always check your writing to make sure you have a good reason for using the passive.
1. In New York in 2009, law-enforcement personnel stopped black and
Hispanic men simply because of their race.
In New York in 2009, black and Hispanic men were stopped simply because of their race.
Active sentence focus: law-enforcement personnel
Passive sentence focus: black and Hispanic men
2. In New York, the cops stopped 13 percent more people in the first nine months of 2009 than in 2008.
13% more people were stopped (by the cops) in New York in the first nine months of 2009 than in 2008. (Ask students to consider the rhetorical difference between including the agent in the passive version and not including it.)
Active sentence focus: the cops in New York
Passive sentence focus: people
3. The police found weapons on just 1.4 percent of Hispanics.
Weapons were found (by police) on just 1.4 percent of Hispanics.
Active sentence focus: the police
Passive sentence focus: weapons
4. The police stopped people of different races in the same proportion that they committed crimes.
People of different races were stopped (by police) in the same proportion that crimes were committed by them. (It is not necessary for students to make both verbs in this sentence passive; however, it will be helpful to discuss the rhetorical effect of both options.)
Active sentence focus: the police; they (the people who committed crimes)
Passive sentence focus: people; crimes
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But individuals who have not done anything wrong should not be harassed by the police.
Active sentence focus: the police
Passive sentence focus: individuals who have not done anything wrong.
Modals
Preparation for Activities 4 and 5
One special kind of verb is called a modal. Modals are different from helping verbs such as have, do, and be. Unlike those verbs, modals don’t have endings like regular verbs. We say, “The policeman has stopped the car,” but we don’t say, “The policeman cans stop the speeding car.”
Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts
Modals
Modals are a special category of verbs that are used to express ability, possibility, permission, certainty, necessity, obligation, preference, and prediction. The meaning of the modal changes the logical meaning of the main verb, so the reader must make an inference or a prediction:
•• “The police officer stopped the speeding cars” is just a statement of fact.
If you say, “The police officer might stop the speeding cars,” you are suggesting that it is possible she will stop the cars, but there is also a chance she won’t.
•• If you say, “The police officer should stop the speeding cars,” you are making a recommendation, but just because you believe the police officer should stop the speeding cars, it doesn’t mean that she actually will.
•• If you say, “The police officer must stop the speeding cars,” you are communicating that you think it is urgent that she stop the speeding cars.
Using modals appropriately is an important way to communicate these and other shades of meaning to readers.
Modals in expository writing
Modals indicate shades of meaning. If everyone agrees something is true, it can be stated as an assertion of fact, using an active verb. Writers often make claims using active verbs and then must support those claims with evidence.
If a writer is unsure about the extent to which something is true, a modal can indicate that it is possible, or likely, or probable. It is an easier task to support a claim that uses a modal than a claim that makes an assertion of fact.
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5. But the police should not harass individuals who have not done anything wrong. RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Indicate possibility: Use modals such as may, might, can, could, are likely to
•• According to the police, these stops of innocent people help fight crime.
(To support this assertion, the police would need to provide evidence that the stops had prevented actual crimes from being committed.)
•• According to the police, the stops of innocent people may help fight crime. (To support this assertion, the police only need to provide evidence that there was a possibility that the stops helped prevent crimes.)
Make a recommendation: Use modals such as should, must, need to, ought to, have to
Writers often express their beliefs and opinions by using modals. Since writers of expository essays are writing to persuade their audience, they frequently use modals to make recommendations about what should happen or what they want their audience to do.
•• The New York City Police Department should be restrained.
•• The New York City Police Department needs to be restrained.
•• The mayor of New York City should restrain the police department.
Optional: Modals and Their Meanings
The following section within Rhetorical Grammar Concepts is useful for
English learners. Depending on their language background and their stage of language development, English learners may be unsure of the precise meaning of various modals and phrasal modals.
Modals and Their Meanings
Modal
can
ability or permission
could
possibility or permission
may
possibility or permission
might
possibility or permission
must
degree of certainty or necessity
shall
necessity
should
obligation
will
prediction
would
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Possible Meanings
possibility or preference
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•• Always come first in the verb phrase
•• Always occur with a subject
•• Are always followed by the simple form of the verb (or by the auxiliaries have and be)
Note: Never put an -s or an -ed on a modal.
Never follow a modal by an infinitive (“to” plus simple verb).
Examples
Racial profiling can happen anywhere right now. (Not “cans happen.” Not
“can to happen.”)
It could happen to someone you know in the future.
It might be difficult to prevent.
Present/future time modals
•• Are followed by the simple form of the verb or an auxiliary
•• May refer either to the present or the future
The police should avoid using racial profiling.
The police may avoid using racial profiling in the future.
Racial profiling must be stopped.
Racial profiling will end when we all realize how unjust it is.
Note: English does not have a real future tense. We use the modal will to predict what will happen in the future.
Past time modals (modal perfects)
•• Are followed by have and the past participle
•• May refer to either the past or the past of a future point of time
The police may have avoided using racial profiling in the past.
(It is possible that the police did not use racial profiling.)
Racial profiling should have ended by the time our children are adults.
(By the time in the future when our children are adults, racial profiling will probably no longer exist, but it has not ended yet.)
Exception
•• Could plus the simple form of the verb is used to refer to a past time
(ability)
From 1992 to 1995, law-enforcement officials could arrest people based on their ethnicity.
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Modals
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Phrasal Modals
Some verbs have the same meaning as modals, but they are formed like regular verbs. They have an -s in the third person singular, present tense, and are followed by an infinitive.
Phrasal Modals and Equivalent Modals
Phrasal Modals
Modals
be able to
We are able to stop racial profiling.
can
We can stop racial profiling.
be going to
We are going to stop racial profiling.
will
We will stop racial profiling.
are about to
We are about to stop racial profiling.
will
We will stop racial profiling.
have to
We have to stop racial profiling. must
We must stop racial profiling.
have got to
We have got to stop racial profiling.
must
We must stop racial profiling.
be supposed to
We are supposed to stop should racial profiling.
We should stop racial profiling.
ought to
We ought to stop racial profiling. should
We should stop racial profiling.
be allowed to
We are allowed to stop racial profiling.
may
We may stop racial profiling.
be likely to
We are likely to stop racial profiling.
could
We could stop racial profiling.
to be about to
We are about to stop racial profiling.
would
We would stop racial profiling.
Note: Both phrasal modals and modals are followed by the simple form of the verb.
Activity 4: Identifying Modals and their Meanings
Have students practice identifying modals and their meanings.
Activity 4: Identifying Modals and their Meanings
This activity is based on a student essay for the Racial Profiling module.
Read the following paragraphs from a student essay about racial profiling.
Double-underline the complete verb phrases in the passage; circle the modals.
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members of minority groups. Statistics show that a police officer is more likely* to pull over a black man for speeding than a white man. When someone is judged by skin color or accent, it can be shameful and humiliating. It’s not fair; it’s not equal; it’s not just. Police officers should protect and serve everyone, not just white people.
If people are judged daily by skin color and nationality, unity will cease to exist.
How can people unite if they cannot look past the surface? Racial profiling may be the greatest cause of division among Americans. “United we stand, but divided we fall.” If America cannot look past its differences, this problem could become worse. If that happens, America, the land of the great, will fall.
Rhetorical purpose: Why does the writer use modals for some verbs but not for others?
The writer uses modals to make recommendations or suggest a possibility. A verb like
“show” in line 2 is used to indicate that something is a fact. It’s harder to argue with him when he uses a modal because it isn’t as definite.
*Note: “is more likely” is a phrasal modal; however, students do not need to identify it for the purpose of this activity.
Now that students have practiced identifying modals and their meaning in
Activity 4, they are ready to use modals in Activity 5.
Activity 5: Using Modals
Complete the following sentences using modals. The sentences should make sense in the context of racial profiling.
1. The New York City police department ____________________________
2. Most Americans _____________________________________________
3. Interrupting the lives of innocent people __________________________
4. The color of someone’s skin ____________________________________
5. Fighting crime ______________________________________________
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Because of their position of authority, police may use their authority to shame
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Editing Student Writing
In activities 6-8 students will apply what they have learned in order to edit student writing. The activities should be taught in conjunction with the Revising and Editing activities in the module. Some of these activities could substitute for editing activities.
Activity 6: Editing Student Writing
The revision activity below is divided into two parts. Students first focus on editing for active verbs rather than passive to make their writing more precise. They then revise using modals to qualify their assertions. Both grammatical features are essential tools for writers constructing arguments that will be clear and persuasive. Student versions will vary. You may wish to project several and ask the writers to explain their grammatical choices from a rhetorical perspective.
Activity 6: Editing Student Writing
This activity is based on a student essay for the Racial Profiling module.
Step 1: Revise the paragraph to make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form and to use modals to qualify assertions where appropriate.
If you need to rewrite an entire sentence, mark the sentence with an asterisk and write your new version at the end of the paragraph.
Likely suspects have been determined by officers using racial profiling, but law enforcement has been led in the wrong direction by accepting stereotypes. After the Oklahoma City bombing, the crime was suspected to have been committed by Middle Eastern terrorists. Instead, the bomber turned out to be a white male and U.S. Army veteran who had earned a Bronze Star. He seemed like the least likely person to commit such a crime. Similarly, well-to-do John Walker
Lindh was an unlikely candidate for a Taliban fighter, although he had left
Marin County and traveled to Afghanistan to join the jihad. Attention from the real perpetrators of crimes is diverted by focusing on race and ethnicity, and profiling stands in the way of effective law enforcement. However, the use of profiling has actually grown since September 11th. According to Amnesty
International, the human rights organization, not only are human rights violated by the practice of profiling by race, religion, and national origin, but it is also counterproductive.
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Officers using racial profiling have determined likely suspects, but accepting stereotypes has led law enforcement in the wrong direction. After the Oklahoma
City bombing, Middle Eastern terrorists were suspected of committing the crime.
Instead, the bomber turned out to be a white male and U.S. Army veteran who had earned a Bronze Start. He seemed like the least likely person to commit such a crime. Similarly, well-to-do John Walker Lindh was an unlikely candidate for a
Taliban fighter, although he had left Marin County and traveled to Afghanistan to join the jihad. Focusing on race and ethnicity diverts attention from the real perpetrators of crimes, and profiling stands in the way of effective law enforcement.
However, the use of profiling has actually grown since September 11th. According to
Amnesty International, the human rights organization, not only does the practice of profiling by race, religion, and national origin violate human rights, but it is also counterproductive. Step 2: Now read your new version, and revise using modals to qualify assertions where appropriate.
Possible response
Officers using racial profiling have determined likely suspects, but accepting stereotypes has may have led law enforcement in the wrong direction. After the
Oklahoma City bombing, Middle Eastern terrorists were suspected of committing the crime. Instead, the bomber turned out to be a white male and U.S. Army veteran who had earned a Bronze Start. He seemed like the least likely person to commit such a crime. Similarly, well-to-do John Walker Lindh was an unlikely candidate for a Taliban fighter, although he had left Marin County and traveled to Afghanistan to join the jihad. Focusing on race and ethnicity diverts can divert attention from the real perpetrators of crimes, and profiling stands (or can stand) in the way of effective law enforcement. However, the use of profiling has actually grown since September 11th. According to Amnesty International, the human rights organization, not only does the practice of profiling by race, religion, and national origin violate human rights, but it is also may also be counterproductive.
Activity 7: Editing Your Guided Composition
In this activity, students will edit their guided composition from Activity 1.
1. Project the original guided composition paragraph and ask your students to read along as you read it out loud.
2. Then project a student paragraph and discuss with the class the differences between the original and the student paragraph (both paragraphs need to be projected simultaneously).
3. Return the student paragraphs and ask your students to edit based on what they’ve learned by doing the activities in the chapter. Don’t give the students access to the original while they are doing this. Direct them to revise assertions in the paragraphs to make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form and to use modals to qualify assertions where appropriate.
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Possible response
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
4. Ask your students to compare their edited versions with the original.
5. “Debrief ” by asking your students what they learned through the comparison and what they can apply to their own writing.
Activity 7: Editing Your Guided Composition
Return to your guided composition from Activity 1.
• Revise the paragraph to make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form and to use modals to qualify assertions where appropriate.
Remember you may choose to leave some assertions in the active tense and some passive verbs, as long as they serve a clear purpose.
• Put a question mark in the margin next to any sentences that you are unsure about. • Exchange your paragraph with a partner, and discuss any questions you have.
Check with your teacher if you cannot agree on an answer.
Activity 8: Editing Your Own Writing
Now ask students to apply what they have learned to editing their own writing assignment. For students who are still developing editing skills, it’s often best to ask them to edit as a separate step. Once students have revised, and they and you are satisfied with their drafts, they can then edit for whatever rhetorical grammar features you have been teaching. Their ability to apply what you have taught will become part of your assessment of their final draft. Then you can revisit concepts and continue to hold students accountable in subsequent modules for these features as well as the new ones that you will teach.
Activity 8: Editing Your Own Writing
Select a paragraph from your writing assignment for Racial Profiling.
• Revise the paragraph to make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form and to use modals to qualify assertions where appropriate.
Remember you may choose to leave some assertions in the active tense and some passive verbs, as long as they serve a clear purpose.
• Put a question mark in the margin next to any sentences that you are unsure about. • Exchange your paragraph with a partner, and discuss any questions you have.
Check with your teacher if you cannot agree on an answer.
• Now edit the rest of your essay by revising assertions that are too general and making passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form.
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Rhetorical Grammar for
Expository Reading and Writing
Developed by Roberta Ching
STUDENT VERSION
MODULE 3: RACIAL PROFILING
Passives and Modals
Activity 1
Guided Composition
This activity is based on Bob Herbert, “Jim Crow Policing”
The purpose of this activity is for you to write a paragraph on the topic of this module. Your teacher will read a paragraph while you listen, and then read it again while you take notes. You will then write your own paragraph based on what you heard using your notes. Noticing Language
Who is responsible for the actions in the following sentences?
1. Ethnic profiling is practiced throughout the country.
2. Not everyone who is stopped is frisked.
3. Deon Dennis was stopped and searched outside his apartment building in Harlem.
4. People are threatened with arrest for disorderly conduct if they object. Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts
The materials labeled
Rhetorical Grammar
Concepts are for your reference as you do the activities in this unit.
Forming the Passive
A passive verb always includes a form of be plus the participle of the verb. (A participle is the -ed or -en form of the verb.)
Examples: is practiced, was arrested, have been taken
In general, only verbs that have a direct object (transitive verbs) can occur in the passive. A direct object is a noun or pronoun that names the receiver or the object of the verb’s action.
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direct object
Active: The police stopped blacks and Hispanics based on their race. The “doer” of the action in an active sentence is the subject. In a passive sentence, the “doer” is called the agent and is expressed in a prepositional phrase with by. Often the agent is omitted.
“doer” = subject
Active: The officer stopped the young man for suspicious attire.
“doer” = agent
Passive: The motorist was stopped (by the officer) for suspicious attire. Activity 2
Identifying Passive Verbs
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: STUDENT VERSION
Underline the subjects and double-underline the passive verbs or verb phrases in the guided composition. Put (parentheses) around the “by” phrases that indicate the agent.
1. According to Bob Herbert, New York police officers need to be restrained from using ethnic profiling.
2. During the first three-quarters of 2009, 450,000 people in New
York were stopped by the cops.
3. Blacks and Hispanics were stopped much more often than whites.
4. Contraband, usually drugs, was found in just 1.6% of the stops of blacks and 1.4% of Hispanics.
5. Weapons were found in even fewer stops.
6. People are stopped for making furtive movements or wearing
“inappropriate attire for the season.”
7. People going about their daily business are menaced out of the blue by the police.
8. Lalit Carson was stopped on his lunch break from his job as a teaching assistant.
9. A class-action lawsuit has been filed against the city by The
Center for Constitutional Rights. It is time to put an end to Jim
Crow policing in New York City.
Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts
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Changing Active Verbs to Passive Verbs
In most cases, writers use active verbs to make clear who or what is performing the action of the sentence. Sometimes writers use passive verbs to avoid assigning responsibility, as in the phrase,
“Mistakes were made but not by me.” In this sentence, we don’t know who made the mistakes.
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Generally, writing that uses active verbs will be stronger and clearer.
However, sometimes writers use the passive intentionally. Below are three reasons for using passive verbs.
1. Use the passive when the agent or “doer” of the action is not known, not important, is obvious, or it is not necessary to name the agent.
Example: John was arrested for loitering.
(The agent is obvious—when someone is arrested it is generally by the police— so the writer doesn’t choose to express the agent.)
Example: Many African Americans and Hispanics have been stopped simply because of their race.
(The writer has put African Americans and Hispanics in the foreground by making them the subject of the sentence. The agent is not specified, although we can infer it is the police.)
3. Use the passive to avoid the informality of using the impersonal you or they.
Examples
Active: You should not stop innocent people based on their race. Passive: Innocent people should not be stopped based on their race.
Activity 3
Changing Active Verbs to Passive Verbs
Rewrite the following sentences from active to passive and indicate how the focus of the sentence changes. If you include the agent in your rewrite, put the “by” phrase (in parentheses). Talk with a partner about why a writer might choose one focus instead of the other for each sentence. Always check your writing to make sure you have a good reason for using the passive.
1. In New York in 2009, law-enforcement personnel stopped black and Hispanic men simply because of their race.
In New York, black and Hispanic men were stopped simply because of their race.
Active sentence focus: law-enforcement personnel
Passive sentence focus: black and Hispanic men
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2. Use the passive when the receiver of the action is the subject rather than the agent of the action. As a result, the focus of the sentence will be on the receiver of the action, not the agent.
2. In New York, the cops stopped 13 percent more people in the first nine months of 2009 than in 2008.
Active sentence focus:
Passive sentence focus:
3. The police found weapons on just 1.4 percent of Hispanics.
Active sentence focus:
Passive sentence focus:
4. The police stopped people of different races in the same proportion that they committed crimes.
Active sentence focus:
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: STUDENT VERSION
Passive sentence focus:
5. But the police should not harass individuals who have not done anything wrong.
Active sentence focus:
Passive sentence focus:
Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts
Modals
One special kind of verb is called a modal. Modals are different from helping verbs such as have, do, and be. Unlike those verbs, modals don’t have endings like regular verbs. We say, “The policeman has stopped the car,” but we don’t say, “The policeman cans stop the speeding car.”
Modals are a special category of verbs that are used to express ability, possibility, permission, certainty, necessity, obligation, preference, and prediction. The meaning of the modal changes the logical meaning of the main verb, so the reader must make an inference or a prediction:
•
•
If you say, “The police officer should stop the speeding cars,” you are making a recommendation, but just because you believe the police officer should stop the speeding cars, it doesn’t mean that she actually will.
•
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“The police officer stopped the speeding cars” is just a statement of fact. If you say, “The police officer might stop the speeding cars,” you are suggesting that it is possible she will stop the cars, but there is also a chance she won’t.
If you say, “The police officer must stop the speeding cars,” you are communicating that you think it is urgent that she stop the speeding cars.
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Using modals appropriately is an important way to communicate these and other shades of meaning to readers.
Modals in Expository Writing
Modals indicate shades of meaning. If everyone agrees something is true, it can be stated as an assertion of fact, using an active verb.
Writers often make claims using active verbs and then must support those claims with evidence. If a writer is unsure about the extent to which something is true, a modal can indicate that it is possible, or likely, or probable. It is an easier task to support a claim that uses a modal than a claim that makes an assertion of fact.
•
According to the police, these stops of innocent people help fight crime. (To support this assertion, the police would need to provide evidence that the stops had prevented actual crimes from being committed.) •
According to the police, the stops of innocent people may help fight crime.
(To support this assertion, the police only need to provide evidence that there was a possibility that the stops helped prevent crimes.)
Make a recommendation: Use modals such as should, must, need to, ought to, have to
Writers often express their beliefs and opinions by using modals.
Since writers of expository essays are writing to persuade their audience, they frequently use modals to make recommendations about what should happen or what they want their audience to do.
•
•
The New York City Police Department needs to be restrained.
•
Activity 4
The New York City Police Department should be restrained.
The mayor of New York City should restrain the police department. Identifying Modals and their Meanings
This activity is based on a student essay for the Racial Profiling module. Read the following paragraphs from a student essay about racial profiling.
Double-underline the complete verb phrases in the passage; circle the modals.
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Indicate possibility: Use modals such as may, might, can, could, are likely to
Because of their position of authority, police may use their authority to shame members of minority groups. Statistics show that a police officer is more likely to pull over a black man for speeding than a white man. When someone is judged by skin color or accent, it can be shameful and humiliating. It’s not fair; it’s not equal; it’s not just.
Police officers should protect and serve everyone, not just white people. If people are judged daily by skin color and nationality, unity will
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: STUDENT VERSION
cease to exist. How can people unite if they cannot look past the surface? Racial profiling may be the greatest cause of division among Americans. “United we stand, but divided we fall.” If America cannot look past its differences, this problem could become worse. If that happens, America, the land of the great, will fall.
Rhetorical purpose: Why does the writer use modals for some verbs but not for others?
Activity 5
Using Modals
Complete the following sentences using modals. The sentences should make sense in the context of racial profiling.
1. The New York City police department ___________________________
2. Most Americans ______________________________________________
3. Interrupting the lives of innocent people ________________________
4. The color of someone’s skin ___________________________________
5. Fighting crime ________________________________________________
Activity 6
Editing Student Writing
This activity is based on a student essay for the Racial Profiling module.
Step 1: Revise the paragraph below to make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form.
If you need to rewrite an entire sentence, mark the sentence with an asterisk and write your new version at the end of the paragraph.
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Likely suspects have been determined by officers using racial profiling, but law enforcement has been led in the wrong direction by accepting stereotypes. After the Oklahoma City bombing, the crime was suspected to have been committed by Middle Eastern terrorists. Instead, the bomber turned out to be a white male and
U.S. Army veteran who had earned a Bronze Star. He seemed like the least likely person to commit such a crime. Similarly, well-to-do
John Walker Lindh was an unlikely candidate for a Taliban fighter, although he had left Marin County and traveled to Afghanistan
diverted by focusing on race and ethnicity, and profiling stands in the way of effective law enforcement. However, the use of profiling has actually grown since September 11th. According to Amnesty
International, the human rights organization, not only are human rights violated by the practice of profiling by race, religion, and national origin, but it is also counterproductive.
Step 2: Now read your new version, and revise using modals to qualify assertions where appropriate.
Activity 7
Editing Your Guided Composition
Return to your guided composition from Activity 1.
•
Revise assertions in your guided composition using modals to make them more defensible and make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form. Remember you may choose to leave some assertions in the active tense and some passive verbs, as long as they serve a clear purpose.
•
Put a question mark in the margin next to any sentences that you are unsure about.
•
Exchange your paragraph with a partner, and discuss any questions you have. Check with your teacher if you cannot agree on an answer.
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to join the jihad. Attention from the real perpetrators of crimes is
Activity 8
Editing Your Own Writing
Select a paragraph from your writing assignment for Racial Profiling.
Put a question mark in the margin next to any sentences that you are unsure about.
•
Exchange your paragraph with a partner and discuss any questions you have. Check with your teacher if you cannot agree on an answer.
•
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Revise assertions in the paragraph using modals to make them more defensible and make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form. Remember you may choose to leave some assertions in the active tense and some passive verbs, as long as they serve a clear purpose.
•
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: STUDENT VERSION
•
Now edit the rest of your essay by revising assertions that are too general and making passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form.
| RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: MODULE 3
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Developed by Kim Flachmann
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
GRADE 12
Reading Selection for this Module
Herbert, Bob. “Jim Crow Policing.” New York Times 2 Feb. 2010, late ed.: A27. Print.
Module Description
This module has been designed to provoke students to take a stand on the controversial topic of racial profiling. The issues surrounding this topic are complex and entangled in related subjects to the extent that a change in one area might dramatically affect other claims in an argument. The module will help students discover the academic moves Bob Herbert makes in his professional essay so that they can use similar strategies in their own essays. As students work through the activities in each section of this module, they will be prompted to articulate what they have discovered so they understand metacognitively how to develop an argument by deconstructing an article that demonstrates the effective use of all three persuasive appeals for a single purpose.
Module Background
This module purposely focuses on a single essay, rather than on multiple essays on this issue, to provoke students to take a stand on this topic and produce their own claims for their final writing assignment. Until recently, Bob Herbert, the author of the essay in this module, was an Op-Ed columnist for the New York Times. He has also been a national correspondent for NBC and a reporter on the Today Show and NBC Nightly News. He presents his strong opinions on the subject of racial profiling and its negative effects on our culture, and students are asked to analyze and respond to his main claims in this essay. The module takes about two to three weeks to complete, depending on the background knowledge of the students.
Module Objectives
In addition to the focus on Common Core State Standards, the module targets the skill areas listed below. Students will be able to
•• Read and respond to an essay rhetorically
•• Analyze an argument
•• Interpret and integrate information from multiple sources
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
•• Compare and contrast diverse perspectives on an issue
•• Analyze contexts rhetorically
•• Write a text-based academic essay
Note: The activities for students provided in the Student Version for this module are copied here in the Teacher Version for your convenience. The shaded areas include the actual activities the students will see. The use of italics in the shaded areas generally indicates possible student responses and may be interspersed with notes to the teacher that are not shaded. If there are notes to the teacher within the shaded areas, they are indicated by italics and parentheses.
Reading Rhetorically
Prereading
The strategies in this section of the
ERWC are designed to prepare students in advance of reading increasingly complex and sophisticated text. These brief, introductory activities will prepare students to learn the content of the
CCSS for ELA/Literacy in the sections of the template that follow.
Getting Ready to Read
As you approach the reading for this module, engage your students in
Bob Herbert’s “Jim Crow Policing” by having them complete Activity 1.
This activity will help motivate your students to read and will promote an inquiring approach to reading and writing by helping them make connections between their personal worlds and the world of the text. It will also encourage them to activate their prior knowledge and experience related to the issues addressed in the text. Read and discuss the activity with your students. Then have them write down their thoughts in a quickwrite to focus their attention and help them discover relationships among old and new ideas. Activity 1: Getting Ready to Read
The following article, “Jim Crow Policing” by Bob Herbert, was first published in the New York Times on February 2, 2010. It tries to persuade its readers that law-enforcement agents should not take any action on the basis of race alone. It uses a combination of logic and emotion to achieve its purpose. Have you ever been stopped by the police because of your appearance? If you have, what was your reaction? If you haven’t, what do you think your reaction would be? Why do you think you would react this way?
Quickwrite: What do you know about racial profiling? What do you think about it? Write for five minutes. Then discuss your response with a partner.
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At this point, introduce your students to Rhetorical Grammar for Expository
Reading and Writing as appropriate for their needs. Begin instruction for
Activity 1 before moving to Exploring Key Concepts in the module. This activity will prepare students for the rhetorical grammar instruction that will follow. Please save the guided compositions that your students write for the
Editing Your Guided Composition Activity 7.
The strategies in this section of the
ERWC are designed to prepare students in advance of reading increasingly complex and sophisticated text. These brief, introductory activities will prepare students to learn the content of the
CCSS for ELA/Literacy in the sections of the template that follow.
Exploring Key Concepts
Exploring key concepts provides an entry point for students into the conversation about the issues raised in the reading selection in this module.
These concepts then provide a frame for other activities that build students’ knowledge and language on this and related topics. The key concepts embedded in this reading will be revisited during the module through additional activities, discussions, and writing prompts. At this point, assign
Activity 2 to begin the process of building a conceptual understanding of the terms and ideas students are about to encounter.
Activity 2: Exploring Key Concepts
Understanding key concepts in a reading selection is essential to good comprehension, so that is where we are going to start the reading process.
Complete the following activities before moving on.
Jim Crow Policing
Look up “Jim Crow” on the Internet.
• What does the term have to do with race?
• Is the reference positive or negative?
• What is its origin?
• What do you think this reference might have to do with police activities?
Now go to the PBS page called “The Rise and Fall of Jim Crow,” and read four of the Jim Crow stories. Be prepared to retell one of them to the class.
Other Key Concepts
Below are some additional important concepts from Herbert’s essay. Write down your personal associations with these terms. Then complete the activity that follows.
• race
• prejudice
• ethnic
• discrimination
• profiling
• stereotyping
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RG Rhetorical Grammar for Expository Reading and Writing
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Complete a “cubing” activity for four of the words listed above. For this exercise, fill in all the squares below for each of the words you choose.
Describe it:
Compare it:
What are its colors, shapes, sizes, smells, tastes, sounds?
Associate it:
What is it similar to?
What does it make you think of?
Apply it:
How is it made?
Argue for it or against it:
Analyze it:
What can you do with it?
How can it be used?
Here is an example of the cubing activity for the word “prejudice”:
Describe it:
Compare it:
A behavior that is ugly, dark, loathsome, mean-spirited, and disrespectful of others; motivated by a sense of superiority
Prejudice is like an illness. It starts out with a cough or a sneeze and escalates into a fever or disease when untreated. It spreads to others through words and violence and, like a disease, can do serious damage to others. Analyze it:
Associate it:
I read about how they ransacked his store, wrote on his walls, and pushed him down on the ground.
When asked what they wanted, they shrugged to say they wanted him gone—him and his kind. I remember thinking I was his kind too—would they come after me?
Apply it:
Made through time, usually handed down in families or communities, delivered with hateful words and ignorant eyes
Used for relief of insecurity or ignorance, used for cruelty or punishment; often used for power
I argue against prejudice, for what good does it do to foster hate and ignorance? How can it move a society to good deeds and kindness when its very spirit is mean and harmful? Reading –
Informational Text
5a. Analyze the use of text features (e.g., graphics, headers, captions)… 4
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Argue for it or against it:
Surveying the Text
Surveying the text will give students an overview of what the essay is about and how it is constructed. It will help them create a framework within which they can make predictions and form questions to guide their reading. The questions in Activity 3 will guide students’ surveys.
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Surveying your reading material (no matter what its length) will give you an overview of what it is about and how it is put together. To learn how to survey an essay, answer the following questions.
1. Who is the author of this essay?
Bob Herbert
2. When and where was this essay published?
The New York Times, Feb. 2, 2010
3. What proper nouns do you notice in this essay?
Jim Crow, New York City Police, Mayor Michael Bloomberg, Police Commissioner
Ray Kelly, Center for Constitutional Rights, Lalit Carson, Deon Dennis, Harlem
4. What do you think the essay will discuss?
Is racial profiling fair to everyone?
The strategies in this section of the
ERWC are designed to prepare students in advance of reading increasingly complex and sophisticated texts. These brief, introductory activities will prepare students to learn the content of the
CCSS for ELA/Literacy in the sections of the template that follow.
Making Predictions and Asking Questions
Asking students to make predictions is one way to ensure that they will read actively instead of passively. Making predictions gives reading purpose and focus. As students complete Activity 4, be sure to ask them to explain how they formed their thoughts and opinions, having them give evidence from the text whenever possible.
Activity 4: Making Predictions and Asking Questions
Making predictions about your reading will help you read actively rather than passively. Active reading promotes learning. Your answers to the following questions will guide you through the process.
1. What do you think this essay is going to be about?
2. What do you think is the purpose of this essay?
3. Who do you think is the intended audience for this piece? What brings you to this conclusion?
4. What do you think the writer wants the reader to do or believe?
5. On the basis of the title and other features of the selection, what information or ideas might this essay present?
6. Do you think the writer will be negative or positive in relation to the topic?
How did you come to this conclusion?
7. What argument about the topic might the article present? What makes you think so?
8. Turn the title into a question (or questions) for you to answer after you have read the essay.
(The answers to these questions will vary according to the level of detail students noticed when they surveyed the text.)
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Activity 3: Surveying the Text
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Depending on students’ responses to the questions so far, you might also create an “Anticipation Guide” that leads them through their first reading.
They should search for the answers to these questions as they read the essay for the first time.
Introduction
•• In the introduction, how does Herbert establish the significance of racial profiling? He connects racial profiling with “humiliation” and “mistreatment.”
Body
•• Why does the author start with statistics in paragraph 2? How do they start to make the essay’s point?
The statistics about stopping give a quick overview of the breadth of the problem.
•• What point is Herbert making when he breaks the data down by race?
He is showing that the problem affects minorities more than whites.
•• Why does the author talk about the reasons New York police stop people?
What does that have to do with his main argument?
Herbert wants to represent the thinking of the New York police. This is law enforcement’s justification for racial profiling.
•• What is the main point of this essay? What examples does Herbert cite to make his point?
Herbert’s main point is that racial profiling is unethical and degrading and it must be stopped.
•• What are the consequences of racial profiling?
It makes innocent citizens victims and affects our right to be in public places.
Language
4. Determine or clarify the meaning of unknown and multiplemeaning words and phrases based on grades 11-12 reading and content, choosing flexibly from a range of strategies.
a. Use context (e.g., the overall meaning of a sentence, paragraph, or text; a word’s position or function in a sentence) as a clue to the meaning of a word or phrase. b. Identify and correctly use patterns of word changes that indicate different meanings or parts of speech
(e.g., conceive,
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Understanding Key Vocabulary
Choosing key words and then reinforcing them throughout the reading process is an important activity for students at all levels of proficiency. The words in Activity 5 are important for students to understand as they read so the definitions are supplied for them.
Activity 5: Understanding Key Vocabulary
The following vocabulary words are important to your understanding of this essay, so the definitions are provided for you:
• abomination (par. 1): an object that is intensely disliked
• contraband (par. 3): illegal imports
• despicable (par. 5): horrible
• degrading (par. 8): humiliating
• unconstitutional (par. 13): illegal
• specious (par. 15): false
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Explain how each of these words is related to one of the key concepts introduced earlier in “Exploring Key Concepts.”
By having students explain the relationship of these words to those on the previous list, you will help them gain a better understanding of the new words and provide practice in making predictions about what they are about to read.
RG Rhetorical Grammar for Expository Reading and Writing
At this point, begin rhetorical grammar instruction for Activities 2-5. Integrate the activities across the Reading, Postreading, and Connecting Reading to
Writing portions of the module, as appropriate for your students’ needs.
Participating in these activities will help prepare them to write their own assignments. Reading
Reading –
Informational Text
Reading for Understanding
1. Cite strong and thorough textual evidence to support analysis of what the text says explicitly as well as inferences drawn from the text, including determining where the text leaves matters uncertain.
The first reading of an essay is intended to help students understand the text and confirm their predictions. This is sometimes called reading “with the grain” or “playing the believing game.”
For Activity 6, ask students to do a form of “think aloud,” with each student reading a different paragraph. Student responses will vary according to their thought processes and prior knowledge. Just make sure your students talk freely and openly about their thoughts as they read the text.
Activity 6: Reading for Understanding
We all process reading material differently. No one way is better than another.
To demonstrate the variety of approaches to this essay, read it aloud, and talk about your responses to the following questions:
1. Which of your predictions turned out to be true?
2. What surprised you?
3. Are you persuaded by the text?
4. If a prediction was inaccurate, what in the text misled you?
5. Can you answer the question you created from the title?
6. What in the essay is confusing to you?
(Student responses will vary)
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
conception, conceivable). Apply knowledge of Greek, Latin, and Anglo-Saxon roots and affixes to draw inferences concerning the meaning of scientific and mathematical terminology.
6. Acquire and use accurately general academic and domain-specific words and phrases, sufficient for reading, writing, speaking, and listening at the college and career readiness level; demonstrate independence in gathering vocabulary knowledge when considering a word or phrase important to comprehension or expression. MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
During this reading, your students should also pay attention to how this writer develops his argument. Understanding how he writes this persuasive essay will equip them to write their own persuasive essays later.
In addition to revisiting their predictions, students can use other strategies to increase their understanding of the text during the first reading. Depending on the level of scaffolding students need, you may wish to encourage them to mark the text with their initial reactions.
Prerequisite Grade 8
Standard: Reading –
Informational Text
5. Analyze in detail the structure of a specific paragraph in a text, including the role of particular sentences in developing and refining a key concept.
Grades 11-12
Reading –
Informational Text
5. Analyze and evaluate the effectiveness of the structure an author uses in his or her exposition or argument, including whether the structure makes points clear, convincing, and engaging.
Speaking & Listening
1. Initiate and participate effectively in a range of collaborative discussions
(one-on- one, in groups, and teacherled) with diverse partners on grades
11–12 topics, texts, and issues, building on others’ ideas and expressing their own clearly and persuasively.
a. Come to discussions prepared, having read and researched material under study; explicitly draw on that preparation by referring to evidence from texts and other research on the topic or issue to stimulate a thoughtful, well-reasoned exchange of ideas. 8
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Considering the Structure of the Text
The questions in Activity 7 require students to map out or graphically represent different aspects of the text so they can gain a clearer understanding of the writer’s approach to the essay’s content. The first two activities will lead to more questions that will help your students analyze what they have read: The first asks students to use their natural visual abilities to graphically represent the relationship of the ideas in the essay to one another; the second activity asks students to divide the selection into meaningful segments and label their rhetorical purpose in the essay. The final exercise in this category prompts students to analyze their findings. All of these activities will lead students to a better understanding of how ideas can be presented and developed in relation to one another in a text.
Activity 7: Considering the Structure of the Text
Learning more about the structure of the text will give you a better understanding of the writer’s approach to its content. Your work on this activity will help you understand the text’s structure as you apply it to your own writing. Making Discoveries
Working in pairs, create a picture outline showing how this essay is structured.
Talk with your partner until you have negotiated a graphic outline that represents how the essay is laid out.
Find another pair, and compare your graphics:
• How are they different?
• How are they the same?
• What major discovery did you make from this exercise?
Descriptive Outlining
Now follow these directions on the essay itself:
• Draw a line across the page where the introduction ends.
• Draw a line across the page where the conclusion begins.
• Draw lines throughout the body of the text that break the text into meaningful segments.
• Then, for each of your segments, label in the left margin its content (what is says).
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• Then, in the right margin label the rhetorical purpose of each segment (why the writer included it in the essay).
Here is a brief outline of the essay:
Background—significance of topic
• Total number of people stopped by New York police in 2009
• Racial makeup of people stopped
• Percentage of people with weapons
Reactions to stops
Reasons for stops
Stories
Commissioner Kelly’s statement
Herbert’s Conclusion
Analyzing Your Findings
Before moving on, discuss the following questions as a class:
• What is the rhetorical purpose of each section you marked?
• How do you suspect each section will affect the readers?
• What is the writer trying to accomplish in each section?
• Which section is most developed?
• Which section is least developed?
• Why do you think the author made these choices?
• On the basis of your descriptive outline of the text, what do you think is the writer’s main claim or argument?
FA Formative Assessment
As an exit slip, have students record individually which section of the text is most persuasive from their point of view. Then have them explain why it is persuasive. These slips will help you learn what your students actually understand of the professional essay’s content and rhetorical strategies.
Reading –
Informational Text
4. Determine the meaning of words and phrases as they are used in a text, including figurative, connotative, and technical meanings; analyze how an author uses and refines the meaning of a key term or terms over the course of a text (e.g., how Madison defines faction in Federalist No. 10).
Noticing Language
This section helps students recognize language patterns in their reading for two purposes: (1) to deepen their understanding of the reading and (2) to be able to use these or similar patterns in their own writing. The following activity asks questions that will guide students to discovering these patterns for themselves.
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b. Work with peers to promote civil, democratic discussions and decision-making, set clear goals and deadlines, and establish individual roles as needed.
c. Propel conversations by posing and responding to questions that probe reasoning and evidence; ensure a hearing for a full range of positions on a topic or issue; clarify, verify, or challenge ideas and conclusions; and promote divergent and creative perspectives.
d. Respond thoughtfully to diverse perspectives; synthesize comments, claims, and evidence made on all sides of an issue; resolve contradictions when possible; and determine what additional information or research is required to deepen the investigation or complete the task. MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Language
1. Demonstrate command of the conventions of standard
English grammar and usage when writing or speaking.
a. Apply the understanding that usage is a matter of convention, can change over time, and is sometimes contested. b. Resolve issues of complex or contested usage, consulting references (e.g.,
Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary of English Usage,
Garner’s Modern
American Usage) as needed.
Activity 8: Noticing Language
Herbert uses two patterns that are especially effective in his essays: (1) the passive voice and (2) word repetition.
The passive voice is applied to a verb in a sentence when the “doer” or actual
“agent” of the action is after the verb in a “by” phrase or completely missing rather than before the verb. Also, a passive verb always includes a form of “be” and a past participle.
Examples: “is practiced,” “was frisked,” “has been stopped”
Agents can be added to a passive verb in a “by” phrase.
Passive: Racial profiling is practiced in New York (by the police).
Active: Police practice racial profiling in New York.
Writers often use the passive when they don’t know or don’t want to reveal the agent or “doer” of their action. Herbert relies heavily on the passive in his essay because in most cases he often doesn’t know who was responsible for the action he is calling into question.
Herbert starts his essay with a sentence in the passive voice:
“The New York City Police Department needs to be restrained” [by whom?].
What other passive verbs do you see in this essay? What effect does this linguistic pattern have on you as a reader?
• Paragraph 2: were stopped and frisked, were stopped
• Paragraph 3:was found, was found
• Paragraph 4: were found
• Paragraph 7: is stopped, is frisked, were stopped, were also frisked
• Paragraph 9: are stopped
• Paragraph 11: were interrupted, was stopped, was stopped and searched, was held
• Paragraph 12: are menaced, [are] forced, are . . . threatened
Effect: The passive voice makes the people being stopped, frisked, and searched more like victims—not in control
Notice that all the sentences after paragraph 12 are in the active voice. What effect does this shift from passive to active voice have on the message that
Herbert is delivering?
The active voice at the end of the essay suggests that the people need to re-establish their control over law enforcement’s use of racial profiling.
In this essay, Herbert also repeats specific words that capture the readers’ attention and keep the focus on these particular concepts. Two examples are stop and frisk, which are repeated throughout the essay. Find three other words or parts of words that Herbert repeats in this essay. What is the effect of these repetitions? 10
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• black
• Hispanic
• percentage
• harassment
• police
• people
• constitutional/unconstitutional
Repetitions emphasize a particular concept and force the readers to see it as a key concept in the reading.
Prerequisite Grade 8
Standard: Reading –
Informational Text
1. Cite the textual evidence that most strongly supports an analysis of what the text says explicitly as well as inferences drawn from the text.
2. Determine a central idea of a text and analyze its development over the course of the text, including its relationship to supporting ideas; …
Grades 11-12
Reading –
Informational Text
2. Determine two or more central ideas of a text and analyze their development over the course of the text, including how they interact and build on one another to provide a complex analysis; …
Annotating and Questioning the Text
Annotating and questioning the text encourages students to process the material in a way that is relevant to them. In the initial reading, students read “with the grain,” playing the “believing game.” In this second reading, they should read “against the grain,” playing the “doubting game.” As your students reread a text, they will develop fluency and build their vocabularies, both of which are integral to successful comprehension.
As students reread the text, ask them to annotate it by making marginal notations (e.g., asking questions, expressing surprise, disagreeing elaborating, and noting any instances of confusion).
Activity 9: Rereading the Text
As you read the essay again, do the following tasks:
• Record the essay’s thesis.
“Ethnic profiling by law-enforcement authorities in the United States comes in many forms, and all of them are disgusting” (par. 3).
• State the thesis as a question.
How does racial profiling occur in the United States?
• Highlight the details throughout the essay that directly answer the question you have written.
• On your copy of the essay, label the following points in the left-hand margin: - The introduction
- The issue or problem the author is writing about
- Examples given by the author
- The author’s main arguments
- The conclusion
• In the right-hand margin, write your reactions to what the author is saying.
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Repeated words:
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Initially, you may want to do this activity collaboratively as a class. Later, ask your students to exchange their annotations and compare their labeling and responses in small groups or in pairs.
Reading –
Informational Text
Analyzing Stylistic Choices
4. Determine the meaning of words and phrases as they are used in a text, including figurative, connotative, and technical meanings; analyze how an author uses and refines the meaning of a key term or terms over the course of a text (e.g., how Madison defines faction in Federalist No. 10),
This particular line of questioning is offered to help students see that the linguistic choices writers make create certain effects for their readers.
The questions in Activity 10 are divided into two categories: Words and
Sentences. You might ask your students to discuss these questions as a class, in small groups, or in individual written assignments.
Language
3. Apply knowledge of language to understand how language functions in different contexts, to make effective choices for meaning or style, and to comprehend more fully when reading or listening.
a. …apply an understanding of syntax to the study of complex texts when reading.
5. Demonstrate understanding of figurative language, word relationships, and nuances in word meanings.
a. Interpret figures of speech (e.g., hyperbole, paradox) in context and analyze their role in the text.
b. Analyze nuances in the meaning of words with similar denotations.
Activity 10: Analyzing Stylistic Choices
Answer the following questions about the words and sentences in this essay to help you understand how the linguistic choices the author has made create certain effects for readers.
Words
1. What does the term “racial profiling” bring to mind for you? Which other words refer to this term—either directly or indirectly?
(Answers to the first question will vary.)
Words: “stopping,” “frisking,” “profiling,” “law enforcement,” “unconstitutional,”
“black,” and “Hispanic”
2. Why do you think Herbert makes these different references to racial profiling? To emphasize the breadth of the concept
3. This essay has several strong words that draw on readers’ emotions. Circle the words that are the most highly charged and be prepared to explain your choices. Why does Herbert use these highly charged words? What effect do they have?
(Answers will vary, but some of the highly charged words are “abomination,”
“harassment,” “laughably bogus,” and “specious.”)
Sentences
1. Is the author’s sentence structure mostly varied or not? What effect does the variety or lack of variety have on the essay?
Herbert uses a combination of simple, compound, complex, and compoundcomplex sentences in this essay, concentrating mostly on simple and complex.
2. Are the sentences readable? Explain your answer.
The author’s varied sentence structure makes the essay very readable. It does not become stagnant at any point.
3. What effect are Herbert’s sentences likely to have on his readers?
His sentence variety will most likely keep the readers engaged and focused.
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Prerequisite Grade 8
Standard: Reading –
Informational Text
2. Determine a central idea of a text and analyze its development over the course of the text, including its relationship to supporting ideas; provide an objective summary of the text.
Grades 11-12
Reading –
Informational Text
2. Determine two or more central ideas of a text and analyze their development over the course of the text, including how they interact and build on one another to provide a complex analysis; provide an objective summary of the text.
Writing
2. Write informative/ explanatory texts to examine and convey complex ideas, concepts, and information clearly and accurately through the effective selection, organization, and analysis of content. 10. Write routinely over extended time frames (time for research, reflection, and revision) and shorter time frames
(a single sitting or a day or two) for a range of tasks, purposes, and audiences.
Prerequisite
Grades 9-10
Standard: Reading –
Informational Text
8. Delineate and evaluate the argument and specific claims in a text, assessing whether the reason-
Summarizing and Responding
Summarizing is a very important strategy that your students will need to learn. It involves extracting the main ideas from a reading selection and explaining what the author says about them. Summarizing is a powerful metacognitive skill that enables readers and writers to synthesize a text’s meaning. It integrates the results of previous reading processes students have engaged in and helps them further understand major ideas and the relationships among them. The act of responding to a summary engages students in forming their own reactions as they are refining their understanding of the author’s ideas and claims. Activity 11 provides a way to get students to summarize without using the traditional assignment, which often brings about negative associations, and then discuss the main ideas they have discovered. This activity has two parts that involve small groups and then the entire class.
Activity 11: Summarizing and Responding
Complete both of the activities below to make sure you understand how to summarize effectively.
Summarizing
The act of summarizing asks you to put someone else’s ideas into your own words, which will improve your understanding of those ideas. Using your previous notes and annotations, work in groups of three or four to summarize the essay’s main points in no more than five sentences. Then generate five questions that might serve as the basis of a class discussion. Use at least five vocabulary words from this module in your summary.
Answers will vary, but make sure your students’ questions actually come out of their summaries. Responding
Turn your questions in to your teacher, who will choose some for class discussion. Choose random questions from student-generated options, and conduct an open discussion of students’ reactions to the essay, with the intention being for them to articulate their opinions and confusions at this point in the process.
Thinking Critically
The following material is designed to move students smoothly and seamlessly into thinking critically about this material. The questions in Activity 12 will move your students through the traditional rhetorical appeals and will let them demonstrate their understanding of the featured vocabulary words. This
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Postreading
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
ing is valid and the evidence is relevant and sufficient; identify false statements and fallacious reasoning. Grades 11-12
Reading –
Informational Text
1. Cite strong and thorough textual evidence to support analysis of what the text says explicitly as well as inferences drawn from the text, including determining where the text leaves matters uncertain.
3. Analyze a complex set of ideas or sequence of events and explain how specific individuals, ideas, or events interact and develop over the course of the text.
5. Analyze and evaluate the effectiveness of the structure an author uses in his or her exposition or argument, including whether the structure makes points clear, convincing, and engaging.
6. Determine an author’s point of view or purpose in a text in which the rhetoric is particularly effective, analyzing how style and content contribute to the power, persuasiveness, or beauty of the text.
Speaking and
Listening
1. Initiate and participate effectively in a range of collaborative discussions (one-on-one, in groups, and teacher-led) with diverse partners on grades 11–12 topics, texts, and issues, building on others’ ideas and expressing their own clearly and persuasively.
a. Come to discussions prepared, having read and researched
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line of questioning will also help your students progress from a literal to an analytical understanding of the reading material.
To answer the questions about the writer (ethos), your students might go online and search for a biography of Robert Herbert at topics.nytimes.com.
The biography on that site reads as follows:
Bob Herbert is no longer writing his column for the New
York Times.
Bob Herbert joined the New York Times as an Op-Ed columnist in June 1993. He writes about politics, urban affairs and social trends in a twice-weekly column.
From January 1991 to May 1993, Mr. Herbert was a national correspondent for NBC and reported regularly on the Today Show and NBC Nightly News.
A founding panelist of Sunday Edition, a weekly discussion program on
WCBS-TV, Mr. Herbert was also the host of Hotline, a weekly hour-long issues program on WNYC-TV, both beginning in 1990.
Previously, Mr. Herbert worked at the Daily News beginning in 1976. His positions at the Daily News included general assignment reporter, national correspondent, consumer affairs editor, city hall bureau chief and city editor.
In 1985, he became a columnist and a member of the Editorial Board. His column continued to appear in the Daily News until February 1993.
His career began in 1970 as a reporter, then night city editor in 1973, of the
Star-Ledger in Newark, NJ.
Born in Brooklyn, Mr. Herbert earned a Bachelor of Science degree in journalism from the State University of New York (Empire State College).
He has taught journalism at Brooklyn College and the Columbia University
School of Journalism.
He has won numerous awards, including the Meyer Berger Award for coverage of New York City, the American Society of Newspaper Editors Award for distinguished newspaper writing, the David Nyhan Prize from the Shorenstein
Center at Harvard University for excellence in political reporting, and the
Ridenhour Courage Prize for the “fearless articulation of unpopular truths.”
Mr. Herbert is the author of Promises Betrayed: Waking Up from the American
Dream (Times Books, 2005).
Mr. Herbert is married and lives in Manhattan.
Activity 12: Thinking Critically—Logos, Ethos, Pathos
The following questions and activities will help you gain a deeper understanding of the Herbert essay. Answer the following questions as thoroughly as you can, choosing evidence from the reading selection to support your answer.
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Questions about Logic (Logos)
1. What are two major claims the author makes in this essay?
Racial profiling is degrading and humiliating.
Racial profiling is unconstitutional.
Racial profiling victimizes innocent people.
Racial profiling is racist.
2. What support does the author provide for these assertions?
3. Can you think of counterarguments the author does not deal with?
He doesn’t discuss whether or not there are any positive consequences from racial profiling. For example, have any criminal acts been stopped or deterred because of racial profiling?
4. Do you think the author has left something out on purpose? Why?
Questions about the Writer (Ethos)
1. Does this author have the right background to speak with authority on this subject? Yes, he has written on politics and urban affairs for the New York Times since
1993.
2. Is this author knowledgeable? Smart? Successful?
His biography supports these descriptions.
3. What does the author’s style and language tell you about him?
His engaging writing style tells us that he thinks deeply and complexly about these issues.
4. Do you trust this author? Why or why not?
5. Do you think this author is deceptive? Why or why not?
6. Do you think this author is serious? Explain your answer.
Questions about Emotions (Pathos)
1. Does this piece affect you emotionally? Which parts?
2. Do you think the author is trying to manipulate readers’ emotions? How?
3. Do your emotions conflict with your logical interpretation of the arguments? 4. Does the author use humor? How does that affect your acceptance of the author’s ideas?
Completing a PAPA Square for the essay will prepare your students further for the writing they are about to do.
Activity 13: PAPA Square
Now that you have answered the questions in Activity 12, you will analyze these issues further by completing a PAPA Square and a quickwrite.
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material under study; explicitly draw on that preparation by referring to evidence from texts and other research on the topic or issue to stimulate a thoughtful, well-reasoned exchange of ideas. b. Work with peers to promote civil, democratic discussions and decision-making, set clear goals and deadlines, and establish individual roles as needed.
c. Propel conversations by posing and responding to questions that probe reasoning and evidence; ensure a hearing for a full range of positions on a topic or issue; clarify, verify, or challenge ideas and conclusions; and promote divergent and creative perspectives.
d. Respond thoughtfully to diverse perspectives; synthesize comments, claims, and evidence made on all sides of an issue; resolve contradictions when possible; and determine what additional information or research is required to deepen the investigation or complete the task. MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
The rhetorical appeals of logos, ethos, and pathos form the basis of rhetorical analysis in this module. A PAPA Square will help you analyze these appeals in your reading and can be used in turn in your own writing. To apply this exercise to your reading, answer the questions around the outside of the box in reference to the essay. In the center, identify the stylistic devices and logical, emotional, and ethical appeals the writer uses to persuade his or her audience.
Now fill in the PAPA Square for the Herbert essay.
Purpose
(What is the writer’s purpose?)
Audience
(Who is the audience?)
Rhetorical Methods and Strategies
Logical Appeals
Argument
(What is the thesis or argument?) Pathetic Appeals
Ethical Appeals
Stylistic Devices
Persona
(What is the author’s persona or public image?)
FA Formative Assessment
Review your students’ PAPA Squares to discover the degree to which they understand the author’s purpose, audience, persona; the essay’s central argument; and the rhetorical appeals of logos, ethos, and pathos.
Provide feedback to students as necessary to help them strengthen their understanding of aspects of the PAPA Square, and discuss the author’s use of rhetorical appeals as warranted by your students’ work in this module so far.
Quickwrite (five minutes)
Choose one of the following topics and write for five minutes:
1. What does this writer want us to believe?
2. What is your response to one of the author’s main ideas?
You might read several of the quickwrites to the class to get a discussion started, have your students read their own quickwrites aloud, or have your students exchange quickwrites and read each other’s aloud.
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Purpose
To create a sense of public outrage over the use of ethnic profiling by lawenforcement authorities in New York
Audience
Rhetorical Methods
Argument
and Strategies
Readers of the New
That racial profiling
York Times (typically well-educated, urban, middle-class professionals) Logical Appeals
Numerical data: total number stopped, race of people stopped, number carrying weapons
is a widespread, unconscionable, unconstitutional violation of citizens’ rights Anecdote: Lalit Carson,
Deon Dennis
Cause/Effect: Lawsuit filed Pathetic Appeals
Strong Words:
“abomination,”
“despicable,”
“degrading,” “bogus,”
“specious”
Sarcasm: “suspicious bulge” Ethical Appeals
Appeal to authority:
Center for
Constitutional Rights
Stylistic Devices
Varied sentence structure Persona
A journalist who is an authority on “politics, urban affairs, and social trends” The strategies in this section of the
ERWC are designed to reinforce students’ learning of the content of the CCSS for
ELA/Literacy in the preceding sections of the template and transfer that learning to other settings.
Reflecting on Your Reading Process
Reflection is an essential component of learning. Students can benefit from either discussing or writing about what they have learned—bringing their reading process to the conscious level. To this end, you might ask your students to respond to the following questions as the source of a quickwrite or a discussion:
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
A sample PAPA Square for “Jim Crow Policing” follows.
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Activity 14: Reflecting on Your Reading Process
Respond to the following questions in a quickwrite:
• What have you learned so far from joining the conversation on this topic?
• What do you still want to learn next?
• What reading strategies did you use or learn in this module? Which strategies will you use in reading other texts? How will these strategies apply to your work in other classes?
• In what ways has your ability to read and discuss texts like this one improved? FA Formative Assessment
Reviewing these quickwrites will let you know what your students know, what they need to know, and where to focus your attention in class.
Connecting Reading to Writing
Writing
5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by planning … focusing on addressing what is most significant for a specific purpose and audience.
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Discovering What You Think
Considering the Writing Task
Many students have trouble with writing assignments because they do not read the assignment carefully. Here are some strategies to help your students overcome this problem:
•• Read the assignment carefully with your students. Help them identify key verbs in writing assignments and define the nature of the support they should provide.
•• Help students specify the topic or focus of the text they are going to write.
Is the topic specified for them? Do they have choices to make about it?
•• Help students determine the rhetorical purpose of the writing. Are they informing or reporting? Are they persuading their readers of something?
Help them recognize how the purpose of the assignment will affect the type of writing they will do. Here are some questions to help them consider this issue:
- What genre is this? Is it a letter, an essay, a report, an email, or something else?
- What format will it have?
- What are the reader expectations for this genre?
- What is your rhetorical purpose?
•• Have your students look for information in the assignment about the audience to whom the writing will be addressed.
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Activity 15: Considering the Writing Task
Reading the assignment carefully to make sure you address all aspects of the prompt is important.
Writing Task
Write an essay that presents your opinion on a controversial issue of your choice. Consult various media sources if you need some ideas. Begin with a debatable thesis statement. Then follow the guidelines for writing an argument essay. As you write your essay, be sure you support your claims with well-chosen evidence. If something in the media (such as a newspaper article, ad, or speech) inspired this assignment, attach a copy to your paper before you turn it in.
Take the following steps for this exercise:
• Read the assignment carefully.
• Decide which issue you are going to discuss.
• Discuss the purpose of the assignment (what will you try to accomplish in writing your essay?).
Writing
5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by planning … focusing on addressing what is most significant for a specific purpose and audience.
9. Draw evidence from literary or informational texts to support analysis, reflection, and research. Speaking and
Listening
1. Initiate and participate effectively in a range of collaborative discussions
(one-on-one, in groups, and teacherled) with diverse partners on grades
11–12 topics, texts, and issues, building
Taking a Stance
Most students will find it helpful to formulate a working thesis statement at this point. They can go through their “invention” work to decide on a statement or assertion they want to develop. Although students can be successful with different approaches to writing, a strong, focused thesis statement can keep the writer on track. This statement may change as students read evidence on their topic, but it will serve as an anchor for each student’s point of view.
Encourage your students to answer the questions in Activity 16 as thoroughly as possible.
Activity 16: Taking a Stance
Taking a stance on your topic at this point in the writing process is essential.
This involves developing a tentative thesis statement and then “trying on” different perspectives within that framework. The two activities in this section will guide you to a position on your topic.
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
•• Remind your students to read the assignment for information about process and deadlines. Help your students sketch out a timeline for completing the assignment in reasonable steps.
•• Ask your students to examine the assignment for information about how they will be graded. According to what criteria will their written work be evaluated? Do they understand each criterion?
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
on others’ ideas and expressing their own clearly and persuasively.
Developing a Tentative Thesis Statement
To begin this process, read as many different perspectives on your topic as you can find. As you read, settle on what you think your stance will be. Then answer the following questions:
1. What specific question will your essay answer? What is your response to this question? (This is your tentative thesis.)
2. What support have you found for your thesis?
3. What evidence have you found for this support (for example, facts, statistics, statements from authorities, personal stories, and examples)?
4. How much background information do your readers need to understand your topic and thesis?
5. If readers were to disagree with your thesis or the validity of your support, what would they say? How would you address their concerns (what would you say to them)?
Developing a tentative thesis now will help you take a stand on the issue you have chosen to write about. Your thesis should be a complete sentence that includes your topic and your opinion on that topic. It can be revised several times, but will ultimately keep your writing on track. Draft a possible thesis for your essay now.
After your students have formulated a working thesis and before they generate their first drafts, give them feedback on their thesis statements, either individually or collectively. Potential writing problems can be averted at this stage.
Trying on Words, Perspectives, and Ideas
Before you actually write a draft, identify two perspectives that would disagree with your stand on the issue. Take on their perspectives and draft a quickwrite from each of their stances.
FA Formative Assessment
At the end of this activity, ask students to draft a statement addressing the
“biggest concern” they have about writing this particular paper. Then, have them share these concerns in three different small groups while you circulate to assess what they need to progress to the next step in their own writing as individuals and as a class.
When you receive these statements, you will have the opportunity to provide students with various forms of supportive feedback, including encouragement for exploring the topic they selected, suggested readings, questions to consider, and advice on their “biggest concern” about the paper.
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Gathering Evidence to Support Your Claims
7. Integrate and evaluate multiple sources of information presented in different media or formats (e.g., visually, quantitatively) as well as in words in order to address a question or solve a problem. Students can select evidence by returning to the readings, their notes, their summaries, their annotations, their descriptive outlining, and other responses in order to find information they may use to support their position and refute the claims of those who disagree. As they gather evidence, they must evaluate it. The next activity will help them gather evidence and evaluate their claims.
Writing
7. Conduct short as well as more sustained research projects to answer a question (including a self-generated question) or solve a problem; narrow or broaden the inquiry when appropriate; synthesize multiple sources on the subject, demonstrating understanding of the subject under investigation. 8. Gather relevant information from multiple authoritative print and digital sources, using advanced searches effectively; assess the strengths and limitations of each source in terms of the task, purpose, and audience; integrate information into the text selectively to maintain the flow of ideas, avoiding plagiarism and overreliance on any one source and following a standard format for citation including footnotes and endnotes.
9. Draw evidence from literary or informational texts to support analysis, reflection, and research. Activity 17: Gathering Evidence to Support Your Claims
As you begin to choose evidence that will support your claims, you must be able to evaluate that information. From your previous work, list the information you are considering using to prove your point. For each item on your list, write down your responses to the following questions:
• How does the piece of evidence support your claim?
• Is it a fact or opinion? If it is an opinion, what facts can you find to support it? • Will the evidence be persuasive to your audience?
Now put a check mark by the items that will serve as good evidence based on these criteria.
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Reading –
Informational Text
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Writing
5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by planning, …, focusing on addressing what is most significant for a specific purpose and audience.
10. Write routinely over extended time frames (time for research, reflection, and revision) and shorter time frames
(a single sitting or a day or two) for a range of tasks, purposes, and audiences.
Getting Ready to Write
Students now need to generate more ideas in preparation for composing a draft of their papers. With the framework of the ideas they took from their work related to this topic, they now need to weave more of their own thoughts and ideas into their plans for developing their essays. The following “prewriting” strategies will help your students move smoothly from reading to writing:
•• Brainstorming
•• Freewriting
•• Informal outlines
•• Clustering/Mapping
•• Quickwrites
Your students may want to refer to their reading notes before engaging in
Activity 18.
Activity 18: Getting Ready to Write
The following exercise will help you move from reading to writing. Once you have chosen a controversial issue and gathered some evidence, you need to fold in your own thoughts and ideas. Either by brainstorming (listing) or freewriting
(writing your thoughts down in prose as fast as they occur), respond to the following questions:
• What is the exact issue?
• Why is it important?
• Do people care about it?
• What is most important about this issue?
• What are some other points of view on this topic?
• How do you think the issue should be resolved?
Writing Rhetorically
Entering the Conversation
Writing
1. Write arguments to support claims in an analysis of substantive topics or texts, using valid reasoning and relevant and sufficient evidence.
4. Produce clear and coherent writing in which the development, organization, and style are
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Composing a Draft
The first draft of an essay provides an opportunity for students to discover what they think about a certain topic. This draft is usually “writer- based,” the goal being simply to get the writer’s ideas down on paper. Your students should start with their brainstorming notes, informal outlines, freewriting, or whatever other materials they have and write a rough draft of their essays.
The guidelines in Activity 19 will teach your students how to write successful arguments. CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Activity 19: Composing a Draft
When you write an argument essay, choose a subject that matters to you. If you have strong feelings, you will find it much easier to gather evidence and convince your readers of your point of view. Keep in mind, however, that your readers might feel just as strongly about the opposite side of the issue. Use the following guidelines to help you write your argument:
1. State your opinion on the topic in your thesis statement.
To write a thesis statement for an argument essay, you will need to take a stand for or against an action or an idea. In other words, your thesis statement must be debatable—a statement that can be argued or challenged and that will not be met with agreement by everyone who reads it. Your thesis statement introduces your subject and states your opinion about that subject.
Bob Herbert’s thesis is his first sentence: “The New York City Police
Department needs to be restrained.” This is a debatable thesis. Some other statements on the topic of ethnic profiling would not be good thesis statements:
• Not debatable: Ethnic profiling by law-enforcement authorities in the
United States often involves minorities.
• Not debatable: Some law-enforcement agencies have strict rules regarding racial profiling.
Herbert sets up his essay with some facts about racial profiling and several references to the practice in New York of stopping and frisking blacks and Hispanics. This background information expands upon his thesis statement.
2. Find out as much as you can about your audience before you write.
Knowing your readers’ backgrounds and feelings on your topic will help you choose the best supporting evidence and examples. Suppose that you want to convince people in two different age groups to quit smoking.
You might tell the group of teenagers that cigarettes make their breath rancid, their teeth yellow, and their clothes smelly. But with a group of adults, you might discuss the horrifying statistics on lung and heart disease associated with long-term smoking.
Herbert’s essay was first published in the New York Times, which addresses a fairly educated audience. The original readers probably thought much like he does on this issue. So he chose his support as if he were talking to people who agree with him.
3. Choose evidence that supports your thesis statement.
Evidence is definitely the most important factor in writing an argument essay. Without solid evidence, your essay is nothing more than opinion; with it, your essay can be powerful and persuasive. If you supply convincing evidence, your readers will not only understand your position but perhaps agree with it.
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
appropriate to task, purpose, and audience.
9. Draw evidence from literary or informational texts to support analysis, reflection, and research. 10. Write routinely over extended time frames (time for research, reflection, and revision) and shorter time frames
(a single sitting or a day or two) for a range of tasks, purposes, and audiences.
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Evidence can consist of facts, statistics, statements from authorities, personal stories, or examples. Personal stories and examples can be based on your own observations, experiences, and reading, but your opinions are not evidence. Other strategies, such as comparison/contrast, definition, and cause/effect, can be particularly useful in building an argument. Use any combination of evidence and writing strategies that supports your thesis statement.
In his essay, Herbert uses several different types of evidence. Here are some examples:
Facts
• Not everyone who is stopped is frisked (par. 7).
• The Center for Constitutional Rights filed a class-action lawsuit against
New York and the police department (par. 11).
• Paul Browne is the chief spokesman for Commissioner Kelly (par. 14).
Statistics
• In 2009, 450,000 people were stopped by cops (par. 2).
• 84 percent of the stops were black and Hispanic (par. 3).
• Contraband was found in 1.6 percent of the black cases, 1.5 percent of the Hispanic, and 1.5 percent of the white (par. 3).
• Weapons were found on 1.1 percent of the blacks, 1.4 percent of the
Hispanics, 1.7 percent of the whites (par. 4).
• Police stopped more than a half million people in 2008 (par. 6)
• Of those stopped, 59.4 percent of the Hispanics were frisked, 56.6 percent of blacks, and 46 percent of whites (par. 7).
Statements from Authorities
• Center for Constitutional Rights (par. 11)
• Police Department (par. 13)
• Paul Browne (par. 14)
• Police Commissioner Kelly (par. 14)
Personal Stories and Examples
• The story about Lalit Carson (par. 11)
• The story about Deon Dennis (par. 11)
4. Anticipate opposing points of view.
In addition to stating and supporting your position, anticipating and responding to opposing views are important. Presenting only your side of the argument leaves half the story untold—the opposition’s half. If you acknowledge that there are opposing arguments and address them, your argument will be more convincing.
In paragraph 14, Herbert acknowledges as opposition a statement made by Paul Browne on behalf of Police Commissioner Kelly. Browne feels the stops are “life-saving.” By acknowledging this statement, Herbert raises his credibility. He then goes on to refute Browne’s claim in the next paragraph.
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CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Pointing out common ground between you and your opponent is also an effective strategy. “Common ground” refers to points of agreement between two opposing positions. For example, one person might be in favor of gun control and another strongly opposed. But they might find common ground—agreement—in the need to keep guns out of teenagers’ hands. Locating some common ground is possible in almost every situation. When you state in your essay that you agree with your opponent on certain points, your reader sees you as a fair person.
Herbert assumes that most of his readers know that ethnic profiling by law-enforcement agencies is going on around the country. His job, then, is to prove the extent and unfairness of it.
6. Maintain a reasonable tone.
Just as you probably wouldn’t win an argument by shouting or making mean or nasty comments, don’t expect your readers to respond well to such tactics. Keep the “voice” of your essay calm and sensible. Your readers will be much more open to what you have to say if they think you are a reasonable person.
Herbert maintains a reasonable tone throughout his essay. Every now and then, he is aggressive—“Racial profiling . . . is an abomination” (par. 1)— and even sarcastic—a “suspicious bulge” (par. 9). But even when he quotes some unbelievable statistics, as he does in paragraphs 2 through 4, he keeps his voice under control and, therefore, earns the respect of his readers.
Writing
1. Write arguments to support claims in an analysis of substantive topics or texts, using valid reasoning and relevant and sufficient evidence.
a. Introduce precise, knowledgeable claim(s), establish the significance of the claim(s), distinguish the claim(s) from alternate or opposing claims, and create an organization that logically sequences claim(s), counterclaims, reasons, and evidence. b. Develop claim(s) and counterclaims fairly and thoroughly, supplying the most relevant evi-
Considering Structure
No rigid formula will cover all of the writing that students may be asked to do, but almost all writing has a beginning, middle, and end—even lab reports and journal articles have standard formats. The following items are traditional parts of all essays:
•• The introduction (usually one or two paragraphs), which “hooks” the reader and provides a thesis statement or road map for the reader;
•• The body (as many paragraphs as necessary), which supports the thesis statement point by point;
•• The conclusion (usually only one paragraph), which summarizes the main points and explains the significance of the argument.
In addition, the number of paragraphs in an essay depends on the nature and complexity of the argument. Here are some additional hints to give your students to help them organize their thoughts:
Introduction
Include the following in your introductory paragraph:
•• A “hook” to get the reader’s attention
•• Background information the audience may need
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
5. Find some common ground.
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
dence for each while pointing out the strengths and limitations of both in a manner that anticipates the audience’s knowledge level, concerns, values, and possible biases. c. Use words, phrases, and clauses as well as varied syntax to link the major sections of the text, create cohesion, and clarify the relationships between claim(s) and reasons, between reasons and evidence, and between claim(s) and counterclaims. e. Provide a concluding statement or section that follows from and supports the argument presented. 2a. Introduce a topic or thesis statement; organize complex ideas, concepts, and information so that each new element builds on that which precedes it to create a unified whole; include formatting
(e.g., headings), graphics (e.g., figures, tables), and multimedia when useful to aiding comprehension. 2b. Develop the topic thoroughly by selecting the most significant and relevant facts, extended definitions, concrete details, quotations, or other information and examples appropriate to the audience’s knowledge of the topic.
2c. Use appropriate and varied transitions and syntax to link the major sections of the text, create cohesion, and clarify the relationships
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•• A thesis statement along with some indication of how the essay will be developed (“forecasting”). Note: The thesis statement states the topic of the essay and the writer’s position on that topic. You may choose to sharpen or narrow your thesis at this point.
Body
The body of an essay should consist of the following parts:
•• Paragraphs that present support for the thesis statement, usually in topic sentences supported with evidence. (Refer to “Getting Ready to Write.”)
•• Paragraphs that include different points of view or address counterarguments
•• Paragraphs or sentences in which you address those points of view by doing the following:
- Refuting them
- Acknowledging them but showing how your argument is better
- Granting them altogether but showing they are irrelevant
•• Evidence that you have considered the values, beliefs, and assumptions of the audience; your own values, beliefs, and assumptions; and some common ground that appeals to the various points of view
Conclusion
The final paragraph (or paragraphs) should consider the following:
•• A review of the argument that supports your thesis
•• The significance of the argument—the “so what?” factor
Activity 20: Considering Structure
All essays should have a beginning, a middle, and an end. This is true of writing in all disciplines. An argument essay has these same divisions with a few more features that will communicate your stance and present your claims as clearly as possible. Since you want your audience to agree with you by the end of your essay, you need to organize it in such a way that your readers can easily follow it. The guidelines in this section will help you organize the material you have gathered into a coherent essay.
The first outline shows the order in which the features of an argument essay are most effective:
Introduction
1. Background information
2. Introduction of the subject
3. Statement of opinion
Body Paragraphs
1. Common ground
2. Lots of evidence (logical and emotional)
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
3. Opposing points of view
4. Response to the opposing points of view
Conclusion
1. Restatement of your position
2. Call for action or agreement
Bob Herbert’s essay follows the general outline just presented. Here is a skeleton outline of his essay:
Introduction
1. Background information about racial profiling in New York City
2. Subject introduced
3. Statement of opinion
Body Paragraphs
1. Evidence: Statistics (par. 2-7)
2. Common ground: Humiliation, fear (par. 8)
3. More background: Reasons for stops (par. 9-10)
4. More evidence: Personal narratives (par. 11-12)
5. Opposing points of view: Police department, Paul Browne (par. 13-14)
6. Response to the opposing points of view: Logical and emotional response
(par. 15)
Conclusion
1. Restatement of the solution (par. 16)
2. Call to action (par. 16)
The arrangement of your evidence in an argument essay depends to a great extent on your readers’ opinions. Most arguments will be organized from general to particular, from particular to general, or from one extreme to another. When you know that your readers already agree with you, arranging your details from general to particular or from most to least important is usually the most effective approach. Using this order, you build on your readers’ agreement and loyalty as you explain your thinking on the subject.
If you suspect that your audience does not agree with you, reverse the organization of your evidence and arrange it from particular to general or from least to most important. In this way, you can take your readers step by step through your reasoning in an attempt to get them to agree with you.
Organize your essay in a way that represents what you just learned in this section. Then draw horizontal lines through your essay to distinguish its beginning, middle, and end. Finally, label the key features of your argument by using the terms from the first outline in this section.
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
among complex ideas and concepts.
2d. Use precise language, domainspecific vocabulary, and techniques such as metaphor, simile, and analogy to manage the complexity of the topic.
2f. Provide a concluding statement or section that follows from and supports the information or explanation presented (e.g., articulating implications or the significance of the topic).
4. Produce clear and coherent writing in which the development, organization, and style are appropriate to task, purpose, and audience.
9. Draw evidence from literary or informational texts to support analysis, reflection, and research. MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
FA Formative Assessment
Ask students to complete an Exit Slip by responding to the following questions:
• How have you used the guidelines in this activity to help structure your paper? • How have these guidelines contributed to your planning of the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion?
When reviewing these slips, you can identify students who may need additional guidance in the development of their papers, such as how to develop body paragraphs, that can become the focus of mini-lessons given to the whole class.
Writing
8. Gather relevant information from multiple authoritative print and digital sources, using advanced searches effectively; assess the strengths and limitations of each source in terms of the task, purpose, and audience; integrate information into the text selectively to maintain the flow of ideas, avoiding plagiarism and overreliance on any one source and following a standard format for citation including footnotes and endnotes.
Using the Words of Others (And Avoiding Plagiarism)
Learning to cite sources accurately and determining how best to incorporate the words and ideas of others are essential for students to establish their own ethos.
The information here will help your students begin to prepare themselves for incorporating the words of others into their own writing. This form of synthesis is an important and complex writing skill. During this process, students will naturally use their content words from the module as they synthesize.
Activity 21: Using the Words of Others
One of the most important features of academic writing is the use of words and ideas from written sources to support your own points. Essentially, there are three ways to incorporate words and ideas from sources into your own writing:
1. Direct quotation. Bob Herbert says, “The nonstop humiliation of young black and Hispanic New Yorkers, including children, by police officers who feel no obligation to treat them fairly or with any respect at all is an abomination” (par. 1).
2. Paraphrase. In “Jim Crow Policing,” Bob Herbert notes that racial profiling in New York of black and Hispanic citizens is humiliating and unfair (par. 1).
This is a paraphrase of the quotation in #1; you can also paraphrase an entire article by putting it in your own words.
3. Summary. In “Jim Crow Policing,” Bob Herbert cites statistics and stories from New York City to prove that racial profiling is extensive and unjust.
The New York Police Commissioner claims that these “stops” are “lifesaving.” But according to the statistics the author provides, too often innocent citizens are harassed and the stops are unwarranted (par. 1).
In-Text Citation. MLA documentation style also requires in-text citations for every direct quotation, indirect quotation, paraphrase, or summary. If the author’s name is given in the text, the page number should be furnished in parentheses at the end of the sentence containing the material. If the author’s name is not provided in your essay, put the author’s name and page number in parentheses after the material.
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CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Prerequisite Grade 8
Standard: Reading –
Informational Text
9. Analyze a case in which two or more texts provide conflicting information on the same topic and identify where the texts disagree on matters of fact or interpretation. Reading –
Informational Text
6. Determine an author’s point of view or purpose in a text in which the rhetoric is particularly effective, analyzing how style and content contribute to the power, persuasiveness, or beauty of the text.
Writing
1d. & 2e. Establish and maintain a formal style and objective tone while attending to the norms and conventions of the discipline in which they are writing.
Language
3. Apply knowledge of language to understand how language functions in different contexts, to make effective choices for meaning or style, and to comprehend more fully when reading or listening.
Negotiating Voices
The goal of negotiating voices is for students to be able to distinguish their ideas from those of their sources and to clarify their stance in relation to those sources. In the section above, students practiced selecting useful and interesting material, punctuating direct quotations, and finding the language for paraphrases and summaries. The following activity can help students put direct quotations, indirect quotations, concepts, facts, ideas, and opinions from other writers into their own texts while keeping all the voices distinct.
Activity 22: Negotiating Voices
One strategy to help you mark the separate voices in an essay that you write is to use clear introductory language, such as the following templates or sentence frames: General Purpose Frames
• The issue of ______ can be viewed from several different perspectives.
• Experts disagree on what to do about ______.
To Introduce the Words of Experts
• Noted researcher John Q. Professor argues that _______.
• In a groundbreaking article, Hermando H. Scientist states that ________.
• According to Patricia A. Politician ________.
To Introduce Contrary Views
• However, the data presented by Hermando H. Scientist show ________.
• On the other hand, Terry T. Teacher believes ________.
To Introduce Your Own Views
• Although some argue for ________, others argue for _______. In my view
________.
• Though researchers disagree, clearly ________.
Many similar frames for introducing the words and ideas of others and signaling a stance on those ideas can be found in They Say/I Say: The Moves That Matter in
Academic Writing, by Gerald Graff and Cathy Birkenstein, an excellent resource for helping students enter the conversation in academic writing. Your students might also create their own frames by looking at language used by professional writers.
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Practice with Sources. Choose two passages from the reading selection that you might be able to use in your essay. First, write down each passage as a correctly punctuated direct quotation. Second, paraphrase the material in your own words. Finally, respond to the idea expressed in the passage by agreeing or disagreeing with it and explaining why. Now you are ready to use this material in an essay.
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Identifying Model Language
Return to the article you read by Bob Herbert, and underline all the quotations and paraphrases in the essay. Based on the model above, explain how two of these are introduced and distinguished from other perspectives and quotations in the essay.
Using Model Language
Now consider the evidence in the essay you are writing, and use these models to write one example for each of these categories (General Purpose, To Introduce the Words of Experts, To Introduce Contrary Views, and To Introduce Your
Own Views). Use the samples above as models only, and create a frame that fits into the context for your essay.
RG Rhetorical Grammar for Expository Reading and Writing
At this point, begin rhetorical grammar instruction for the Editing Student
Writing Activities 6-8. These activities should be taught in conjunction with the Revising and Editing activities in the module. Some of these activities could substitute for various editing activities in the module itself.
Revising and Editing
Writing
1c. Use words, phrases, and clauses as well as varied syntax to link the major sections of the text, create cohesion, and clarify the relationships between claim(s) and reasons, between reasons and evidence, and between claim(s) and counterclaims.
1d. & 2e. Establish and maintain a formal style and objective tone while attending to the norms and conventions of the discipline in which they are writing.
1f. Use specific rhetorical devices to support assertions
(e.g., appeal to logic through reasoning; appeal to emotion or ethical belief; relate a personal anecdote, case study, or analogy.
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Revising Rhetorically
Your students now need to work on the organization and development of their drafts to make sure their essays are as effective as possible. They should produce their next drafts on the basis of systematic feedback from others.
A rhetorical approach to revision can help your students understand that revision is a strategic, selective process and that ultimately what writers choose to revise depends on the purpose and audience for their writing.
When students revise rhetorically, their drafts will be more “reader-based” than the first drafts because the students will take into consideration the needs of the readers as they respond to the text.
Activity 23: Revising Rhetorically—Rhetorical Analysis
A rhetorical analysis of an essay requires you to assess writing based on the purpose of the writing, the message of the argument, the needs of the audience, and the persona the writer adopts. The following questions will get you started on a rhetorical revision:
• What is the rhetorical situation? Who is my audience, and what is my purpose? • What types of appeals (logical or emotional) will be most effective with this audience? CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
• How can I establish my own authority on this issue? What credibility do I have with this audience?
Just as it did in your reading, a PAPA Square can help you analyze the rhetorical strategies in your own writing. To apply this exercise to your writing, answer the questions around the outside of the box in reference to your own essay. In the center, identify the stylistic devices and logical, emotional, and ethical appeals you use to persuade your audience.
Fill in the PAPA Square below for your essay.
Purpose
(What is the writer’s purpose?)
Audience
(Who is the audience?)
Speaking and
Listening
1. Initiate and participate effectively in a range of collaborative discussions
(one-on-one, in groups, and teacherled) with diverse
Logical Appeals
Argument
(What is the thesis or argument?) Pathetic Appeals
Ethical Appeals
Reading –
Informational Text
1. Cite strong and thorough textual evidence to support analysis of what the text says explicitly as well as inferences drawn from the text, including determining where the text leaves matters uncertain.
5. Analyze and evaluate the effectiveness of the structure an author uses in his or her exposition or argument, including whether the structure makes points clear, convincing, and engaging.
6. Determine an author’s point of view or purpose in a text in which the rhetoric is particularly effective, analyzing how style and content contribute to the power, persuasiveness, or beauty of the text.
Rhetorical Methods and Strategies
Stylistic Devices
Persona
(What is the author’s persna or public image?)
Quickwrite (5 minutes): What did you learn about your essay from this analysis? Write freely and openly about the role of the appeals in your essay, your persona, your audience, and your purpose. Do you think this essay will persuade your readers?
The next stage of revision involves getting feedback from your peers.
Activity 24: Revision Workshop
Now that you have assessed your essay from your perspective, it is time to share it with some classmates.
Peer Group Work
Working in groups of three or four, read your essay aloud to the other members of the group. Then use Part I of the Evaluation Form provided by your teacher as a revising checklist for each essay.
(The Evaluation Form is at the end of the Assignment Template.)
Paired Work
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
2c. Use appropriate and varied transitions and syntax to link the major sections of the text, create cohesion, and clarify the relationships among complex ideas and concepts.
4. Produce clear and coherent writing in which the development, organization, and style are appropriate to task, purpose, and audience.
5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by … revising … rewriting, or trying a new approach, focusing on addressing what is most significant for a specific purpose and audience.
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
partners on grades
11–12 topics, texts, and issues, building on others’ ideas and expressing their own clearly and persuasively. Individual Work
Revise the draft based on the feedback you have received and the decisions you have made with your partners. Consider the following questions as revision guidelines for your individual work:
• Have I responded to the assignment?
• What is my purpose for this essay?
• What should I keep? Which parts are the most effective?
• What should I add? Where do I need more details, examples, and other evidence to support my point?
• What could I delete? Do I use irrelevant details? Am I repetitive?
• What should I change? Are parts of my essay confusing or contradictory? Do
I need to explain my ideas more fully?
• What should I rethink? Is my position clear? Have I provided enough analysis to convince my readers?
• How is my tone? Am I too overbearing or too firm? Do I need qualifiers?
• Have I identified common ground?
• Have I addressed differing points of view?
• Does my conclusion show the significance of my essay?
• Have I used key vocabulary words correctly to accurately represent my ideas on this topic?
Language
3. Apply knowledge of language to understand how language functions in different contexts, to make effective choices for meaning or style, and to comprehend more fully when reading or listening.
a. Vary syntax for effect, consulting references (e.g.,
Tufte’s Artful
Sentences) for guidance as needed; apply an understanding of syntax to the study of complex texts when reading.
Writing
1f. Use specific rhetorical devices to support assertions
(e.g., appeal to logic through reasoning; appeal to emotion or ethical belief; relate a personal anec-
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Considering Stylistic Choices
This section asks students if the style of their writing, including both word choice and sentence structure, is as effective as possible for its purpose and audience. Activity 25: Considering Stylistic Choices
Every choice you make as you write is stylistic. When you write a word, a phrase, or a sentence a certain way, that is your style. Since you are in complete control of this commodity, you can change your words and sentences to create certain effects that will be sure to reach your intended audience.
Answer the following questions about your writing style in this essay. Then decide if you want to make any changes to create a different effect.
• How will the language you have used affect your readers’ response? Are any references too harsh? Too mild? Or too sensitive for your audience? In other words, is your language appropriate for your intended audience?
• Which words or synonyms have you repeated? Are these effective repetitions?
Explain your answer.
• Did you use any figurative language? Why did you use it?
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Language
1. Demonstrate command of the conventions of standard
English grammar and usage when writing or speaking.
a. Apply the understanding that usage is a matter of convention, can change over time, and is sometimes contested. b. Resolve issues of complex or contested usage, consulting references (e.g.,
Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary of English Usage,
Garner’s Modern
American Usage) as needed.
2. Demonstrate command of the conventions of standard
English capitalization, punctuation, and spelling when writing. a. Observe hyphenation conventions.
b. Spell correctly.
Writing
5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by … editing, … (Editing for conventions should demonstrate command of Language standards 1–3 up to and including grades 11–12.)
• What effects will your choices of sentence structure and length have on the readers? • In what ways does your language convey your identity and character?
Quickwrite (5 minutes): What stylistic changes can I make in my essay to persuade my intended audience more effectively?
Editing the Draft
As students move closer to their final drafts, their essays take another large step toward reader-based prose. At this point, this means that for clear, effective communication to take place, students have to conform to the guidelines of standard written English.
•• In this case, students will benefit most from specific feedback from you or a tutor rather than from peer evaluation.
•• This work might be preceded by lessons on common errors in grammar, usage, punctuation, and mechanics that follow Part II (Editing) of the
Evaluation Form (Appendix X).
Activity 26: Editing the Draft
Edit your draft on the basis of the information you have received from your instructor or from a tutor. Use Part II of the Evaluation Form as an editing checklist. The following editing guidelines will also help you to edit your own work: • If possible, set your essay aside for 24 hours before rereading it to find errors.
• Read your essay aloud so you can hear your errors and rough spots.
• Focus on individual words and sentences rather than on the overall meaning.
Take a sheet of paper and cover everything except the line you are reading.
Then touch your pencil to each word as you read.
• With the help of your teacher, figure out your own pattern of errors—the most serious and frequent errors you make.
• Look for only one type of error at a time. Then go back and look for a second type and, if necessary, a third.
• Use a dictionary to check spelling and confirm that you have chosen the right word for the context.
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
dote, case study, or analogy). 2d. Use precise language, domainspecific vocabulary, and techniques such as metaphor, simile, and analogy to manage the complexity of the topic.
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
Using the Evaluation Form Part II (at the end of the Assignment Template) for peer work, individual work, or conferences with you for the purpose of editing will give your students a consistent checklist for each writing task.
Beyond this appendix, students can consult either an Online Writing Lab
(OWL) or a grammar/usage handbook for explanations of any rules or conventions that confuse them. The Purdue Online Writing Lab is one of the best, most comprehensive resources available for editing. You also might consider marking your student papers exclusively for one skill at a time, letting the skills accumulate as the term progresses.
Writing
5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by … revising, editing, rewriting, or trying a new approach, focusing on addressing what is most significant for a specific purpose and audience.
Responding to Feedback
Students need feedback on their writing. Some of this can be from peers during the revision stage, but instructor feedback is essential. Although responding to drafts and conferencing with students is undoubtedly time consuming, it is important to intervene in the writing process at the most useful points and to make comments that are well-targeted both to the assignment’s demands and to the student’s needs and language development.
The most valuable point for students to receive feedback is before they revise and edit, so they can actively apply to the next draft what they learn from your response. One particularly effective time for you to respond is after students have produced their first revised, “reader-based” draft. Students can then use your feedback to revise and improve the final draft they will submit for a final grade.
Activity 27: Responding to Feedback
Based on the activities and quickwrites you have done in the revising and editing sections, make a list of changes you want to make in your essay. Review the criteria and explanations offered in these two segments. Then revise and edit your essay in a way that reflects what you learned about your draft in this final section.
The strategies in this section of the ERWC are designed to reinforce students’ learning of the content of the CCSS for ELA/Literacy in the preceding sections of the template.
Writing
10. Write routinely over extended time frames (time for research, reflection, and revision) and shorter time frames
(a single sitting or a day or two) for a range of tasks, purposes, and audiences.
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Reflecting on Your Writing Process
Reflection is an essential component in learning. Reflection allows students to articulate their attitudes and assumptions about literacy and the role it plays in their developing academic identities. Just before your students turn in their essays, a good practice is to ask them to reflect in writing on the process of writing their essays—which parts of the essays they want you to notice and what they learned from writing.
Activity 28: Reflecting on Your Writing
Reflecting on your writing is an essential part of improving on your next assignment. When you have completed your essay, answer these six questions and submit your thoughts with your final draft.
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
• What was easiest?
• By completing this assignment, what did you learn about arguing?
• What do you think are the strengths of your argument? Place a wavy line by the parts of your essay that you feel are very good.
• What are the weaknesses, if any, of your paper? Place an X by the parts of your essay you would like help with. Write any questions you have in the margin. • What have you learned from this assignment about your own writing process—about preparing to write, about writing the first draft, about revising, and about editing?
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MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
• What was most difficult about this assignment?
MODULE: TEACHER VERSION
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CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Jim Crow Policing
By Bob Herbert
New York Times, February 2, 2010
The New York City Police Department needs to be restrained. The nonstop humiliation of young black and Hispanic New Yorkers, including children, by police officers who feel no obligation to treat them fairly or with any respect at all is an abomination. That many of the officers engaged in the mistreatment are black or Latino themselves is shameful.
2
Statistics will be out shortly about the total number of people who were stopped and frisked by the police in 2009. We already have the data for the first three-quarters of the year, and they are staggering. During that period, more than 450,000 people were stopped by the cops, an increase of 13 percent over the same period in 2008.
3
An overwhelming 84 percent of the stops in the first three-quarters of 2009 were of black or Hispanic New Yorkers. It is incredible how few of the stops yielded any law enforcement benefit. Contraband, which usually means drugs, was found in only 1.6 percent of the stops of black New Yorkers.
For Hispanics, it was just 1.5 percent. For whites, who are stopped far less frequently, contraband was found 2.2 percent of the time.
4
The percentages of stops that yielded weapons were even smaller. Weapons were found on just 1.1 percent of the blacks stopped, 1.4 percent of the
Hispanics, and 1.7 percent of the whites. Only about 6 percent of stops result in an arrest for any reason.
5
Rather than a legitimate crime-fighting tool, these stops are a despicable, racially oriented tool of harassment. And the police are using it at the increasingly enthusiastic direction of Mayor Michael Bloomberg and Police
Commissioner Ray Kelly.
6
There were more than a half-million stops in New York City in 2008, and when the final tally is in, we’ll find that the number only increased in 2009.
7
Not everyone who is stopped is frisked. When broken down by ethnic group, the percentages do not at first seem so wildly disproportionate. Some
59.4 percent of all Hispanics who were stopped were also frisked, as were
56.6 percent of blacks, and 46 percent of whites. But keep in mind, whites composed fewer than 16 percent of the people stopped in the first place.
8
These encounters with the police are degrading and often frightening, and the real number of people harassed is undoubtedly higher than the numbers reported by the police. Often the cops will stop, frisk and sometimes taunt people who are at their mercy, and then move on—without finding anything, making an arrest, or recording the encounter as they are supposed to.
9
Even the official reasons given by the police for the stops are laughably bogus.
People are stopped for allegedly making “furtive movements,” for wearing clothes “commonly used in a crime,” and, of course, for the “suspicious bulge.” My wallet, my notebook and my cellphone would all apply.
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READING SELECTIONS
1
The Center for Constitutional Rights has filed a class-action lawsuit against the city and the Police Department over the stops. Several plaintiffs detailed how their ordinary daily lives were interrupted by cops bent on harassment for no good reason. Lalit Carson was stopped while on a lunch break from his job as a teaching assistant at a charter school in the Bronx. Deon Dennis was stopped and searched while standing outside the apartment building in which he lives in Harlem. The police arrested him, allegedly because of an outstanding warrant. He was held for several hours then released. There was no outstanding warrant.
12
There are endless instances of this kind of madness. People going about their daily business, bothering no one, are menaced out of the blue by the police, forced to spread themselves face down in the street, or plaster themselves against a wall, or bend over the hood of a car, to be searched. People who object to the harassment are often threatened with arrest for disorderly conduct. 13
The Police Department insists that these stops of innocent people—which are unconstitutional, by the way—help fight crime. And they insist that the policy is not racist.
14
Paul Browne, the chief spokesman for Commissioner Kelly, described the stops as “life-saving.” And he has said repeatedly that the racial makeup of the people stopped and frisked is proportionally similar to the racial makeup of people committing crimes.
15
That is an amazingly specious argument. The fact that a certain percentage of criminals may be black or Hispanic is no reason for the police to harass individuals from those groups when there is no indication whatsoever that they have done anything wrong.
16
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The police say they also stop people for wearing “inappropriate attire for the season.” I saw a guy on the Upper West Side wearing shorts and sandals a couple weeks ago. That was certainly unusual attire for the middle of January, but it didn’t cross my mind that he should be accosted by the police.
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READING SELECTIONS
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It’s time to put an end to Jim Crow policing in New York City.
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Racial Profiling
Developed by Kim Flachmann
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Reading Selection for this Module:
Herbert, Bob. “Jim Crow Policing.” New York Times 2 Feb. 2010, late ed.: A27. Print.
Reading Rhetorically
Prereading
Activity 1
Getting Ready to Read
The following article, “Jim Crow Policing” by Bob Herbert, was first published in the New York Times on February 2, 2010. It tries to persuade its readers that law-enforcement agents should not take any action on the basis of race alone. It uses a combination of logic and emotion to achieve its purpose. Have you ever been stopped by the police because of your appearance? If you have, what was your reaction? If you haven’t, what do you think your reaction would be?
Why do you think you would react this way?
Quickwrite: What do you know about racial profiling? What do you think about it? Write for five minutes. Then discuss your response with a partner.
Activity 2
Exploring Key Concepts
Understanding key concepts in a reading selection is essential to good comprehension, so that is where we are going to start the reading process. Complete the following activities before moving on.
Jim Crow Policing
Look up “Jim Crow” on the Internet.
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What does the term have to do with race?
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Is the reference positive or negative?
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What is its origin?
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What do you think this reference might have to do with police activities? Now go to the PBS page called “The Rise and Fall of Jim Crow,” and read four of the Jim Crow stories. Be prepared to retell one of them to the class.
Other Key Concepts
Below are some important concepts from Herbert’s essay. Write down your personal associations with these terms. Then complete the activity that follows.
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race
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prejudice
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ethnic
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discrimination
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profiling
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stereotyping
Complete a “cubing” activity for four of the words listed above. For this exercise, fill in all the squares below for each of the words you choose. Describe it:
Compare it:
What are its colors, shapes, sizes, smells, tastes, sounds?
What is it similar to?
Associate it:
Analyze it:
What does it make you think of?
How is it made?
Apply it:
Argue for it or against it:
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
What can you do with it?
How can it be used?
Activity 3
Surveying the Text
Surveying your reading material (no matter what its length) will give you an overview of what it is about and how it is put together. To learn how to survey an essay, answer the following questions.
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1. Who is the author of this essay?
2. When and where was this essay published?
3. What proper nouns do you notice in this essay?
4. What do you think the essay will discuss?
Activity 4
Making Predictions and Asking Questions
Making predictions about your reading will help you read actively rather than passively. Active reading promotes learning. Your answers to the following questions will guide you through the process. 1. What do you think this essay is going to be about?
2. What do you think is the purpose of this essay?
3. Who do you think is the intended audience for this piece? What brings you to this conclusion?
4. What do you think the writer wants the reader to do or believe?
5. On the basis of the title and other features of the selection, what information or ideas might this essay present?
6. Do you think the writer will be negative or positive in relation to the topic? How did you come to this conclusion?
7. What argument about the topic might the article present? What makes you think so?
8. Turn the title into a question (or questions) for you to answer after you have read the essay.
Activity 5
Understanding Key Vocabulary
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abomination (par. 1): an object that is intensely disliked
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contraband (par. 3): illegal imports
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despicable (par. 5): horrible
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degrading (par. 8): humiliating
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unconstitutional (par. 13): illegal
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specious (par. 15): false
Explain how each of these words is related to one of the key concepts introduced earlier in “Exploring Key Concepts.”
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
The following vocabulary words are important to your understanding of this essay, so the definitions are provided for you:
Reading
Activity 6
Reading for Understanding
We all process reading material differently. No one way is better than another. To demonstrate the variety of approaches to this essay, read it aloud, and talk about your responses to the following questions:
1. Which of your predictions turned out to be true?
2. What surprised you?
3. Are you persuaded by the text?
4. If a prediction was inaccurate, what in the text misled you?
5. Can you answer the question you created from the title?
6. What in the essay is confusing to you?
Activity 7
Considering the Structure of the Text
Learning more about the structure of the text will give you a better understanding of the writer’s approach to its content. Your work on this activity will help you understand the text’s structure as you apply it to your own writing.
Making Discoveries
Working in pairs, create a picture outline showing how this essay is structured. Talk with your partner until you have negotiated a graphic outline that represents how the essay is laid out.
Find another pair, and compare your graphics:
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How are they different?
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How are they the same?
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What major discovery did you make from this exercise?
Descriptive Outlining
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Now follow these directions on the essay itself:
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Draw lines throughout the body of the text that break the text into meaningful segments.
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Draw a line across the page where the conclusion begins.
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Draw a line across the page where the introduction ends.
Then, for each of your segments, label in the left margin its content (what is says).
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Then, in the right margin label the rhetorical purpose of each segment (why the writer included it in the essay).
Analyzing Your Findings
Before moving on, discuss the following questions as a class:
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How do you suspect each section will affect the readers?
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What is the writer trying to accomplish in each section?
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Which section is most developed?
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Which section is least developed?
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Why do you think the author made these choices?
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Activity 8
What is the rhetorical purpose of each section you marked?
On the basis of your descriptive outline of the text, what do you think is the writer’s main claim or argument?
Noticing Language
Herbert uses two patterns that are especially effective in his essays:
(1) the passive voice and (2) word repetition.
The passive voice is applied to a verb in a sentence when the “doer” or actual “agent” of the action is after the verb in a “by” phrase or completely missing rather than before the verb. Also, a passive verb always includes a form of “be” and a past participle.
Examples: “is practiced,” “was frisked,” “has been stopped”
Agents can be added to a passive verb in a “by” phrase.
Passive: Racial profiling is practiced in New York (by the police).
Active: Police practice racial profiling in New York.
Herbert starts his essay with a sentence in the passive voice:
“The New York City Police Department needs to be restrained” [by whom?]. What other passive verbs do you see in this essay? What effect does this linguistic pattern have on you as a reader?
Notice that all the sentences after paragraph 12 are in the active voice. What effect does this shift from passive to active voice have on the message that Herbert is delivering?
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Writers often use the passive when they don’t know or don’t want to reveal the agent or “doer” of their action. Herbert relies heavily on the passive in his essay because in most cases he often doesn’t know who was responsible for the action he is calling into question.
In this essay, Herbert also repeats specific words that capture the readers’ attention and keep the focus on these particular concepts.
Two examples are stop and frisk, which are repeated throughout the essay. Find three other words or parts of words that Herbert repeats in this essay. What is the effect of these repetitions?
Activity 9
Rereading the Text
As you read the essay again, do the following tasks:
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Record the essay’s thesis.
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State the thesis as a question.
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Highlight the details throughout the essay that directly answer the question you have written.
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On your copy of the essay, label the following points in the lefthand margin:
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Examples given by the author
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The author’s main arguments
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Activity 10
The issue or problem the author is writing about
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The introduction
The conclusion
In the right-hand margin, write your reactions to what the author is saying.
Analyzing Stylistic Choices
Answer the following questions about the words and sentences in this essay to help you understand how the linguistic choices the author has made create certain effects for readers.
Words
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
1. What does the term “racial profiling” bring to mind for you?
Which other words refer to this term—either directly or indirectly? 2. Why do you think Herbert makes these different references to racial profiling?
3. This essay has several strong words that draw on readers’ emotions. Circle the words that are the most highly charged and be prepared to explain your choices. Why does Herbert use these highly charged words? What effect do they have?
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Sentences
1. Is the author’s sentence structure mostly varied or not? What effect does the variety or lack of variety have on the essay?
2. Are the sentences readable? Explain your answer.
3. What effect are Herbert’s sentences likely to have on his readers?
Postreading
Activity 11
Summarizing and Responding
Complete both of the activities below to make sure you understand how to summarize effectively.
Summarizing
The act of summarizing asks you to put someone else’s ideas into your own words, which will improve your understanding of those ideas. Using your previous notes and annotations, work in groups of three or four to summarize the essay’s main points in no more than five sentences. Then generate five questions that might serve as the basis of a class discussion. Use at least five vocabulary words from this module in your summary.
Responding
Turn your questions in to your teacher, who will choose some for class discussion.
Activity 12
Thinking Critically—Logos, Ethos, Pathos
The following questions and activities will help you gain a deeper understanding of the Herbert essay. Answer the following questions as thoroughly as you can, choosing evidence from the reading selection to support your answer.
Questions about Logic (Logos)
2. What support does the author provide for these assertions?
3. Can you think of counterarguments the author does not deal with?
4. Do you think the author has left something out on purpose? Why?
Questions about the Writer (Ethos)
1. Does this author have the right background to speak with authority on this subject?
2. Is this author knowledgeable? Smart? Successful?
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
1. What are two major claims the author makes in this essay?
3. What does the author’s style and language tell you about him?
4. Do you trust this author? Why or why not?
5. Do you think this author is deceptive? Why or why not?
6. Do you think this author is serious? Explain your answer.
Questions about Emotions (Pathos)
1. Does this piece affect you emotionally? Which parts?
2. Do you think the author is trying to manipulate readers’ emotions? How?
3. Do your emotions conflict with your logical interpretation of the arguments? 4. Does the author use humor? How does that affect your acceptance of the author’s ideas?
PAPA Square
Activity 13
Now that you have answered the questions in Activity 12, you will analyze these issues further by completing a PAPA Square and a quickwrite. The rhetorical appeals of logos, ethos, and pathos form the basis of rhetorical analysis in this module. A PAPA Square will help you analyze these appeals in your reading and can be used in turn in your own writing. To apply this exercise to your reading, answer the questions around the outside of the box in reference to the essay. In the center, identify the stylistic devices and logical, emotional, and ethical appeals the writer uses to persuade his or her audience. Now fill in the PAPA Square for the Herbert essay.
Purpose
(What is the writer’s purpose?)
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Audience
(Who is the audience?) Rhetorical Methods and Strategies
Logical Appeals
Argument
(What is the thesis or argument?) Pathetic Appeals
Ethical Appeals
Stylistic Devices
Persona
(What is the author’s persona or public image?)
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Quickwrite (five minutes)
Choose one of the following topics and write for five minutes:
1. What does this writer want us to believe?
2. What is your response to one of the author’s main ideas?
Activity 14
Reflecting on Your Reading Process
Respond to the following questions in a quickwrite:
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What have you learned so far from joining the conversation on this topic?
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What do you still want to learn next?
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What reading strategies did you use or learn in this module?
Which strategies will you use in reading other texts? How will these strategies apply to your work in other classes?
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In what ways has your ability to read and discuss texts like this one improved?
Connecting Reading to Writing
Discovering What You Think
Activity 15
Considering the Writing Task
Reading the assignment carefully to make sure you address all aspects of the prompt is important.
Write an essay that presents your opinion on a controversial issue of your choice. Consult various media sources if you need some ideas. Begin with a debatable thesis statement. Then follow the guidelines for writing an argument essay. As you write your essay, be sure you support your claims with well-chosen evidence.
If something in the media (such as a newspaper article, ad, or speech) inspired this assignment, attach a copy to your paper before you turn it in.
Take the following steps for this exercise:
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Read the assignment carefully.
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Decide which issue you are going to discuss.
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Discuss the purpose of the assignment (what will you try to accomplish in writing your essay?).
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Writing Task
Activity 16
Taking a Stance
Taking a stance on your topic at this point in the writing process is essential. This involves developing a tentative thesis statement and then “trying on” different perspectives within that framework. The two activities in this section will guide you to a position on your topic. Developing a Tentative Thesis Statement
To begin this process, read as many different perspectives on your topic as you can find. As you read, settle on what you think your stance will be. Then answer the following questions:
1. What specific question will your essay answer? What is your response to this question? (This is your tentative thesis.)
2. What support have you found for your thesis?
3. What evidence have you found for this support (for example, facts, statistics, statements from authorities, personal stories, and examples)? 4. How much background information do your readers need to understand your topic and thesis?
5. If readers were to disagree with your thesis or the validity of your support, what would they say? How would you address their concerns (what would you say to them)?
Developing a tentative thesis now will help you take a stand on the issue you have chosen to write about. Your thesis should be a complete sentence that includes your topic and your opinion on that topic. It can be revised several times, but will ultimately keep your writing on track. Draft a possible thesis for your essay now.
Trying on Words, Perspectives, and Ideas
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Before you actually write a draft, identify two perspectives that would disagree with your stand on the issue. Take on their perspectives, and draft a quickwrite from each of their stances.
Activity 17
Gathering Evidence to Support Your Claims
As you begin to choose evidence that will support your claims, you must be able to evaluate that information. From your previous work, list the information you are considering using to prove your point. For each item on your list, write down your responses to the following questions:
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How does the piece of evidence support your claim?
Is it a fact or opinion? If it is an opinion, what facts can you find to support it?
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Will the evidence be persuasive to your audience?
Now put a check mark by the items that will serve as good evidence based on these criteria.
Activity 18
Getting Ready to Write
The following exercise will help you move from reading to writing.
Once you have chosen a controversial issue and gathered some evidence, you need to fold in your own thoughts and ideas. Either by brainstorming (listing) or freewriting (writing your thoughts down in prose as fast as they occur), respond to the following questions:
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What is the exact issue?
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Why is it important?
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Do people care about it?
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What is most important about this issue?
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What are some other points of view on this topic?
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How do you think the issue should be resolved?
Writing Rhetorically
Entering the Conversation
Activity 19
Composing a Draft
When you write an argument essay, choose a subject that matters to you. If you have strong feelings, you will find it much easier to gather evidence and convince your readers of your point of view.
Keep in mind, however, that your readers might feel just as strongly about the opposite side of the issue. Use the following guidelines to help you write your argument:
To write a thesis statement for an argument essay, you will need to take a stand for or against an action or an idea. In other words, your thesis statement must be debatable—a statement that can be argued or challenged and that will not be met with agreement by everyone who reads it. Your thesis statement introduces your subject and states your opinion about that subject.
Bob Herbert’s thesis is his first sentence: “The New York City
Police Department needs to be restrained.” This is a debatable thesis. Some other statements on the topic of ethnic profiling would not be good thesis statements:
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1. State your opinion on the topic in your thesis statement.
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Not debatable: Ethnic profiling by law-enforcement authorities in the United States often involves minorities.
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Not debatable: Some law-enforcement agencies have strict rules regarding racial profiling.
Herbert sets up his essay with some facts about racial profiling and several references to the practice in New York of stopping and frisking blacks and Hispanics. This background information expands upon his thesis statement.
2. Find out as much as you can about your audience before you write.
Knowing your readers’ backgrounds and feelings on your topic will help you choose the best supporting evidence and examples. Suppose that you want to convince people in two different age groups to quit smoking. You might tell the group of teenagers that cigarettes make their breath rancid, their teeth yellow, and their clothes smelly. But with a group of adults, you might discuss the horrifying statistics on lung and heart disease associated with long-term smoking.
Herbert’s essay was first published in the New York Times, which addresses a fairly educated audience. The original readers probably thought much like he does on this issue. So he chose his support as if he were talking to people who agree with him.
3. Choose evidence that supports your thesis statement.
Evidence is definitely the most important factor in writing an argument essay. Without solid evidence, your essay is nothing more than opinion; with it, your essay can be powerful and persuasive. If you supply convincing evidence, your readers will not only understand your position but perhaps agree with it.
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Evidence can consist of facts, statistics, statements from authorities, personal stories, or examples. Personal stories and examples can be based on your own observations, experiences, and reading, but your opinions are not evidence. Other strategies, such as comparison/contrast, definition, and cause/effect, can be particularly useful in building an argument. Use any combination of evidence and writing strategies that supports your thesis statement.
In his essay, Herbert uses several different types of evidence.
Here are some examples:
Facts
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The Center for Constitutional Rights filed a class-action lawsuit against New York and the police department (par. 11).
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Not everyone who is stopped is frisked (par. 7).
Paul Browne is the chief spokesman for Commissioner Kelly
(par. 14).
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Statistics
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In 2009, 450,000 people were stopped by cops (par. 2).
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84 percent of the stops were black and Hispanic (par. 3).
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Contraband was found in 1.6 percent of the black cases, 1.5 percent of the Hispanic, and 1.5 percent of the white (par. 3).
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Weapons were found on 1.1 percent of the blacks, 1.4 percent of the Hispanics, 1.7 percent of the whites (par. 4).
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Police stopped more than a half million people in 2008 (par. 6)
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Of those stopped, 59.4 percent of the Hispanics were frisked,
56.6 percent of blacks, and 46 percent of whites (par. 7).
Statements from Authorities
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Center for Constitutional Rights (par. 11)
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Police Department (par. 13)
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Paul Browne (par. 14)
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Police Commissioner Kelly (par. 14)
Personal Stories and Examples
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The story about Lalit Carson (par. 11)
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The story about Deon Dennis (par. 11)
4. Anticipate opposing points of view.
In paragraph 14, Herbert acknowledges as opposition a statement made by Paul Browne on behalf of Police Commissioner Kelly.
Browne feels the stops are “life-saving.” By acknowledging this statement, Herbert raises his credibility. He then goes on to refute
Browne’s claim in the next paragraph.
5. Find some common ground.
Pointing out common ground between you and your opponent is also an effective strategy. “Common ground” refers to points of agreement between two opposing positions. For example, one person might be in favor of gun control and another strongly opposed. But they might find common ground—agreement—in the need to keep guns out of teenagers’ hands. Locating some
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
In addition to stating and supporting your position, anticipating and responding to opposing views are important. Presenting only your side of the argument leaves half the story untold—the opposition’s half. If you acknowledge that there are opposing arguments and address them, your argument will be more convincing. common ground is possible in almost every situation. When you state in your essay that you agree with your opponent on certain points, your reader sees you as a fair person.
Herbert assumes that most of his readers know that ethnic profiling by law-enforcement agencies is going on around the country. His job, then, is to prove the extent and unfairness of it.
6. Maintain a reasonable tone.
Just as you probably wouldn’t win an argument by shouting or making mean or nasty comments, don’t expect your readers to respond well to such tactics. Keep the “voice” of your essay calm and sensible. Your readers will be much more open to what you have to say if they think you are a reasonable person.
Herbert maintains a reasonable tone throughout his essay.
Every now and then, he is aggressive—“Racial profiling . . . is an abomination” (par. 1)—and even sarcastic—a “suspicious bulge”
(par. 9). But even when he quotes some unbelievable statistics, as he does in paragraphs 2 through 4, he keeps his voice under control and, therefore, earns the respect of his readers.
Activity 20
Considering Structure
All essays should have a beginning, a middle, and an end. This is true of writing in all disciplines. An argument essay has these same divisions with a few more features that will communicate your stance and present your claims as clearly as possible. Since you want your audience to agree with you by the end of your essay, you need to organize it in such a way that your readers can easily follow it. The guidelines in this section will help you organize the material you have gathered into a coherent essay.
The first outline shows the order in which the features of an argument essay are most effective:
Introduction
1. Background information
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
2. Introduction of the subject
3. Statement of your opinion
Body Paragraphs
1. Common ground
2. Lots of evidence (logical and emotional)
3. Opposing points of view
4. Response to the opposing points of view
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Conclusion
1. Restatement of your position
2. Call for action or agreement
Bob Herbert’s essay follows the general outline just presented. Here is a skeleton outline of his essay:
Introduction
1. Background information about racial profiling in New York City
2. Subject introduced
3. Statement of opinion
Body Paragraphs
1. Evidence: Statistics (par. 2-7)
2. Common ground: Humiliation, fear (par. 8)
3. More background: Reasons for stops (par. 9-10)
4. More evidence: Personal narratives (par. 11-12)
5. Opposing points of view: Police department, Paul Browne (par.
13-14)
6. Response to the opposing points of view: logical and emotional response (par. 15)
Conclusion
1. Restatement of the solution (par. 16)
The arrangement of your evidence in an argument essay depends to a great extent on your readers’ opinions. Most arguments will be organized from general to particular, from particular to general, or from one extreme to another. When you know that your readers already agree with you, arranging your details from general to particular or from most to least important is usually the most effective approach. Using this order, you build on your readers’ agreement and loyalty as you explain your thinking on the subject.
If you suspect that your audience does not agree with you, reverse the organization of your evidence and arrange it from particular to general or from least to most important. In this way, you can take your readers step by step through your reasoning in an attempt to get them to agree with you.
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
2. Call to action (par. 16)
Organize your essay in a way that represents what you just learned in this section. Then draw horizontal lines through your essay to distinguish its beginning, middle, and end. Finally, label the key features of your argument by using the terms from the first outline in this section.
Activity 21
Using the Words of Others
One of the most important features of academic writing is the use of words and ideas from written sources to support your own points.
Essentially, there are three ways to incorporate words and ideas from sources into your own writing:
1. Direct quotation. Bob Herbert says, “The nonstop humiliation of young black and Hispanic New Yorkers, including children, by police officers who feel no obligation to treat them fairly or with any respect at all is an abomination” (par. 1).
2. Paraphrase. In “Jim Crow Policing,” Bob Herbert notes that racial profiling in New York of black and Hispanic citizens is humiliating and unfair (par. 1).
This is a paraphrase of the quotation in #1; you can also paraphrase an entire article by putting it in your own words.
3. Summary. In “Jim Crow Policing,” Bob Herbert cites statistics and stories from New York City to prove that racial profiling is extensive and unjust. The New York Police Commissioner claims that these “stops” are “life-saving.” But according to the statistics the author provides, too often innocent citizens are harassed and the stops are unwarranted (par. 1).
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
In-Text Citation. MLA documentation style also requires in-text citations for every direct quotation, indirect quotation, paraphrase, or summary.
If the author’s name is given in the text, the page number should be furnished in parentheses at the end of the sentence containing the material. If the author’s name is not provided in your essay, put the author’s name and page number in parentheses after the material.
Practice with Sources. Choose two passages from the reading selection that you might be able to use in your essay. First, write down each passage as a correctly punctuated direct quotation. Second, paraphrase the material in your own words. Finally, respond to the idea expressed in the passage by agreeing or disagreeing with it and explaining why. Now you are ready to use this material in an essay.
Activity 22
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Negotiating Voices
One strategy to help you mark the separate voices in an essay that you write is to use clear introductory language, such as the following templates or sentence frames:
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General Purpose Frames
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The issue of ______ can be viewed from several different perspectives. •
Experts disagree on what to do about ______.
To Introduce the Words of Experts
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Noted researcher John Q. Professor argues that _______.
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In a groundbreaking article, Hermando H. Scientist states that
________.
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According to Patricia A. Politician ________.
To Introduce Contrary Views
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However, the data presented by Hermando H. Scientist show
________.
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On the other hand, Terry T. Teacher believes ________.
To Introduce Your Own Views
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Although some argue for ________, others argue for _______. In my view ________.
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Though researchers disagree, clearly ________.
Identifying Model Language
Return to the article you read by Bob Herbert, and underline all the quotations and paraphrases in the essay. Based on the model above, explain how two of these are introduced and distinguished from other perspectives and quotations in the essay.
Now consider the evidence in the essay you are writing, and use these models to write one example for each of these categories
(General Purpose, To Introduce the Words of Experts, To Introduce
Contrary Views, and To Introduce Your Own Views). Use the samples above as models only, and create a frame that fits into the context for your essay.
Revising and Editing
Activity 23
Revising Rhetorically—Rhetorical Analysis
A rhetorical analysis of an essay requires you to assess writing based on the purpose of the writing, the message of the argument, the needs of the audience, and the persona the writer adopts. The following questions will get you started on a rhetorical revision:
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Using Model Language
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What is the rhetorical situation? Who is my audience, and what is my purpose?
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What types of appeals (logical or emotional) will be most effective with this audience?
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How can I establish my own authority on this issue? What credibility do I have with this audience?
Just as it did in your reading, a PAPA Square can help you analyze the rhetorical strategies in your own writing. To apply this exercise to your writing, answer the questions around the outside of the box in reference to your own essay. In the center, identify the stylistic devices and logical, emotional, and ethical appeals you use to persuade your audience.
Fill in the PAPA Square below for your essay.
Purpose
(What is the writer’s purpose?)
Audience
(Who is the audience?) Rhetorical Methods and Strategies
Logical Appeals
Argument
(What is the thesis or argument?) Pathetic Appeals
Ethical Appeals
Stylistic Devices
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
Persona
(What is the author’s persona or public image?)
Quickwrite (5 minutes): What did you learn about your essay from this analysis? Write freely and openly about the role of the appeals in your essay, your persona, your audience, and your purpose. Do you think this essay will persuade your readers?
Activity 24
Revision Workshop
Now that you have assessed your essay from your perspective, it is time to share it with some classmates.
Peer Group Work
Working in groups of three or four, read your essay aloud to the other members of the group. Then use Part I of the Evaluation Form provided by your teacher as a revising checklist for each essay.
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Paired Work
Work in pairs to decide how you will revise the problems that group members identified.
Individual Work
Revise the draft based on the feedback you have received and the decisions you have made with your partners. Consider the following questions as revision guidelines for your individual work:
•
•
What is my purpose for this essay?
•
What should I keep? Which parts are the most effective?
•
What should I add? Where do I need more details, examples, and other evidence to support my point?
•
What could I delete? Do I use irrelevant details? Am I repetitive?
•
What should I change? Are parts of my essay confusing or contradictory? Do I need to explain my ideas more fully?
•
What should I rethink? Is my position clear? Have I provided enough analysis to convince my readers?
•
How is my tone? Am I too overbearing or too firm? Do I need qualifiers? •
Have I identified common ground?
•
Have I addressed differing points of view?
•
Does my conclusion show the significance of my essay?
•
Have I used key vocabulary words correctly to accurately represent my ideas on this topic?
Considering Stylistic Choices
Every choice you make as you write is stylistic. When you write a word, a phrase, or a sentence a certain way, that is your style. Since you are in complete control of this commodity, you can change your words and sentences to create certain effects that will be sure to reach your intended audience.
Answer the following questions about your writing style in this essay. Then decide if you want to make any changes to create a different effect.
•
How will the language you have used affect your readers’ response? Are any references too harsh? Too mild? Or too sensitive for your audience? In other words, is your language appropriate for your intended audience?
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Activity 25
Have I responded to the assignment?
•
Which words or synonyms have you repeated? Are these effective repetitions? Explain your answer.
•
Did you use any figurative language? Why did you use it?
•
What effects will your choices of sentence structure and length have on the readers?
•
In what ways does your language convey your identity and character? Quickwrite (5 minutes): What stylistic changes can I make in my essay to persuade my intended audience more effectively?
Activity 26
Editing the Draft
Edit your draft on the basis of the information you have received from your instructor or from a tutor. Use Part II of the Evaluation
Form as an editing checklist. The following editing guidelines will also help you to edit your own work:
Read your essay aloud so you can hear your errors and rough spots. •
Focus on individual words and sentences rather than on the overall meaning. Take a sheet of paper and cover everything except the line you are reading. Then touch your pencil to each word as you read.
•
With the help of your teacher, figure out your own pattern of errors—the most serious and frequent errors you make.
•
Look for only one type of error at a time. Then go back and look for a second type and, if necessary, a third.
•
Activity 27
If possible, set your essay aside for 24 hours before rereading it to find errors.
•
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
•
Use a dictionary to check spelling and confirm that you have chosen the right word for the context.
Responding to Feedback
Based on the activities and quickwrites you have done in the revising and editing sections, make a list of changes you want to make in your essay. Review the criteria and explanations offered in these two segments. Then revise and edit your essay in a way that reflects what you learned about your draft in this final section.
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Activity 28
Reflecting on Your Writing Process
Reflecting on your writing is an essential part of improving on your next assignment. When you have completed your essay, answer these six questions and submit your thoughts with your final draft.
What was most difficult about this assignment?
•
What was easiest?
•
By completing this assignment, what did you learn about arguing? •
What do you think are the strengths of your argument? Place a wavy line by the parts of your essay that you feel are very good.
•
What are the weaknesses, if any, of your paper? Place an X by the parts of your essay you would like help with. Write any questions you have in the margin.
•
What have you learned from this assignment about your own writing process—about preparing to write, about writing the first draft, about revising, and about editing?
MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
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MODULE: STUDENT VERSION
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Rhetorical Grammar for
Expository Reading and Writing
Developed by Roberta Ching
TEACHER VERSION
MODULE 3: RACIAL PROFILING
Passives and Modals
Focus: Writers often can make choices about how they direct a reader’s attention. In constructing arguments, they want the reader to focus on the most important element in the sentence. Making choices about using passive or active construction gives writers that control. Writers also use modals to make sure that their assertions can be defended and to make recommendations.
Alignment with Standards: The Rhetorical Grammar
Concepts and activities in this unit align with both
California’s Common Core State Standards for English
Language Arts and Literacy and the California English
Language Development Standards. The activities in this unit are designed to provide students with command of the grammar and usage conventions of academic English.
Students analyze how language functions in different contexts and how writers make grammatical choices that are appropriate for their purpose and audience. After analyzing language structures in the texts of others, students apply this knowledge to edit their own writing by using language resources such as varying verb tenses, expanding verb and noun phrases, modifying to add details, combining clauses to link ideas, and using cohesion devices to create arguments that are coherent and persuasive.
AT A GLANCE
Guided Composition
Activity 1
Rhetorical Grammar
Instruction
Passive Verbs
Activity 2
Activity 3
Modals
Activity 4
Activity 5
Editing Student Writing
Editing to Student Writing
Activity 6
Editing Your Guided
Composition
Activity 7
Editing Your Own Writing
Activity 8
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RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Guided Composition
The following activity should be introduced before you move on to Exploring Key Concepts in the module, Racial Profiling. You will need to save your students’ guided compositions from Activity 1 for
Activity 7, Editing Your Guided Composition.
Guided Composition
The purpose of this guided composition activity is to elicit a paragraph of student writing on the topic of racial profiling. You can informally diagnose your students’ strengths and weaknesses in the area of use of the passive voice and qualifying words and structures. At the end of the unit, students will edit their paragraphs, applying what they have learned from the chapter. Students will then compare their paragraphs with the original, paying particular attention to the use of the passive and qualifying words and structures.
1. Instruct your students to listen as you read the following paragraph at a normal rate of speed. Then ask them to take notes while you read the paragraph again; emphasize that the notes will be essential when they write their paragraphs. Alternatively, write a series of key words or phrases on the board to guide your students.
2. Ask your students to reconstruct what they heard using their notes or the key words. Students should compare with each other what they have written and make changes as necessary.
3. Collect the paragraphs at the end of the activity, and save them. You will return them to your students to edit at the end of the chapter.
4. Discuss the “Noticing Language” sentences.
Paragraph to read:
According to Bob Herbert, New York police officers need to be restrained from using ethnic profiling. During the first three-quarters of 2009, 450,000 people in New York were stopped by the cops. An overwhelming 84% who were stopped were black or Hispanic. Contraband, usually drugs, was found in just 1.6% of the stops of blacks and 1.4% of Hispanics. Weapons were found in even fewer stops. The real number of people who are harassed is undoubtedly higher. People are stopped for making furtive movements or wearing “inappropriate attire for the season.” People going about their daily business are menaced out of the blue by the police. Lalit Carson was stopped on his lunch break from his job as a teaching assistant. A class-action lawsuit has been filed against the city by The Center for Constitutional Rights. It is time to put an end to Jim Crow policing in New York City.
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This activity is based on Bob Herbert, “Jim Crow Policing”
The purpose of this activity is for you to write a paragraph on the topic of this module. Your teacher will read a paragraph while you listen, and then read it again while you take notes. You will then write your own paragraph based on what you heard using your notes.
Noticing Language
Who is responsible for the actions in the following sentences?
1. Ethnic profiling is practiced throughout the country.
You can’t tell because the sentence doesn’t tell you who practices ethnic profiling.
Is it the police? Or the government?
2. Not everyone who is stopped is frisked.
You can’t tell, but you can guess it is the police because that’s who frisks people.
3. Deon Dennis was stopped and searched outside his apartment building in
Harlem.
You can’t tell, but it’s probably the New York City police since Harlem is in
Manhattan.
4. People are threatened with arrest for disorderly conduct if they object.
You can’t tell. It could be the police, and the police could be anywhere. We can’t tell if they are in New York.
Rhetorical Grammar Instruction
Integrate the rhetorical grammar instruction for Activities 2-5 into the Reading, Postreading, and
Connecting Reading to Writing portions of the module, as appropriate for your students’ needs. Each rhetorical grammar activity should take approximately 10 to 20 minutes.
Passive Verbs
Preparation for Activities 2 and 3
As you help students to understand how to form and use passive verbs, be sure to emphasize that the choice about whether or not to use a passive verb depends on the writer’s rhetorical purpose. A good writer of an expository essay knows when to use a passive verb effectively; however, inexperienced writers often use passives without having a clear reason, making their arguments less precise and convincing than they should be.
To prepare students to do the activities in this section, consider going over the sample sentences below on the topic of racial profiling with the whole class and eliciting explanations from the students. Adjust the amount of instruction you provide according to how much students already know.
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RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Activity 1: Guided Composition
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts
Note: The materials labeled Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts are for your reference as you plan instruction for this unit. Your students have an abbreviated version of these concepts in their materials. Forming the Passive
•• A passive verb always includes a form of be plus the participle of the verb.
(A participle is the -ed or -en form of the verb.)
Examples: is practiced, was arrested, have been taken
•• In general, only verbs that have a direct object (transitive verbs) can occur in the passive. A direct object is a noun or pronoun that names the receiver or the object of the verb’s action. direct object
Active: The police stopped blacks and Hispanics based on their race.
Passive: Blacks and Hispanics were stopped by the police based on their race.
The “doer” of the action in an active sentence is the subject. In a passive sentence, the “doer” is called the agent and is expressed in a prepositional phrase with by. Often the agent is omitted.
“doer” = subject
Active: The officer stopped the young man for suspicious attire.
“doer” = agent
Passive: The motorist was stopped (by the officer) for suspicious attire.
Activity 2: Identifying Passive Verbs
For this activity, do the example sentence with your students before asking them to complete the rest independently. Rather than correcting the activities, you may want to have students work in pairs to arrive at a consensus while you circulate to answer questions. Then ask pairs to share their answers with the class, at which point you can provide feedback and correct misunderstandings.
Activity 2: Identifying Passive Verbs
Underline the subjects and double-underline the passive verbs or verb phrase in the guided composition. Put (parentheses) around the “by” phrases that indicate the agent.
1. According to Bob Herbert, New York police officers need to be restrained from using ethnic profiling.
2. During the first three-quarters of 2009, 450,000 people in New York were stopped (by the cops).
3. Blacks and Hispanics were stopped much more often than whites.
4. Contraband, usually drugs, was found in just 1.6% of the stops of blacks and 1.4% of Hispanics.
5. Weapons were found in even fewer stops.
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7. People going about their daily business are menaced out of the blue (by the police). 8. Lalit Carson was stopped on his lunch break from his job as a teaching assistant. 9. A class-action lawsuit has been filed against the city (by The Center for
Constitutional Rights). It is time to put an end to Jim Crow policing in
New York City.
Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts
Changing Active Verbs to Passive Verbs
In most cases, writers use active verbs to make clear who or what is performing the action of the sentence. Sometimes writers use passive verbs to avoid assigning responsibility, as in the phrase, “Mistakes were made but not by me.” In this sentence, we don’t know who made the mistakes.
Generally, writing that uses active verbs will be stronger and clearer. However, sometimes writers use the passive intentionally. Below are three reasons for using passive verbs.
1. Use the passive when the agent or “doer” of the action is not known, not important, is obvious, or it is not necessary to name the agent.
Example: John was arrested for loitering.
(The agent is obvious—when someone is arrested, it is generally by the police— so the writer doesn’t choose to express the agent.)
2. Use the passive when the receiver of the action is the subject rather than the agent of the action. As a result, the focus of the sentence will be on the receiver of the action, not the agent.
Example: Many African Americans and Hispanics have been stopped simply because of their race.
(The writer has put African Americans and Hispanics in the foreground by making them the subject of the sentence. The agent is not specified, although we can infer it is the police.)
3. Use the passive to avoid the informality of using the impersonal you or they. Examples
Active: You should not stop innocent people based on their race.
Passive: Innocent people should not be stopped based on their race.
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6. People are stopped for making furtive movements or wearing
“inappropriate attire for the season.”
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Activity 3: Changing Active Verbs to Passive Verbs
For this activity, do the example sentence with your students before asking them to complete the rest independently. Rather than correcting the activities, you may want to have students work in pairs to arrive at a consensus while you circulate to answer questions. Then ask pairs to share their answers with the class, at which point you can provide feedback and correct misunderstandings.
Activity 3: Changing Active Verbs to Passive Verbs
Rewrite the following sentences from active to passive and indicate how the focus of the sentence changes. If you include the agent in your rewrite, put the “by” phrase in parentheses. Talk with a partner about why a writer might choose one focus instead of the other for each sentence. Always check your writing to make sure you have a good reason for using the passive.
1. In New York in 2009, law-enforcement personnel stopped black and
Hispanic men simply because of their race.
In New York in 2009, black and Hispanic men were stopped simply because of their race.
Active sentence focus: law-enforcement personnel
Passive sentence focus: black and Hispanic men
2. In New York, the cops stopped 13 percent more people in the first nine months of 2009 than in 2008.
13% more people were stopped (by the cops) in New York in the first nine months of 2009 than in 2008. (Ask students to consider the rhetorical difference between including the agent in the passive version and not including it.)
Active sentence focus: the cops in New York
Passive sentence focus: people
3. The police found weapons on just 1.4 percent of Hispanics.
Weapons were found (by police) on just 1.4 percent of Hispanics.
Active sentence focus: the police
Passive sentence focus: weapons
4. The police stopped people of different races in the same proportion that they committed crimes.
People of different races were stopped (by police) in the same proportion that crimes were committed by them. (It is not necessary for students to make both verbs in this sentence passive; however, it will be helpful to discuss the rhetorical effect of both options.)
Active sentence focus: the police; they (the people who committed crimes)
Passive sentence focus: people; crimes
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But individuals who have not done anything wrong should not be harassed by the police.
Active sentence focus: the police
Passive sentence focus: individuals who have not done anything wrong.
Modals
Preparation for Activities 4 and 5
One special kind of verb is called a modal. Modals are different from helping verbs such as have, do, and be. Unlike those verbs, modals don’t have endings like regular verbs. We say, “The policeman has stopped the car,” but we don’t say, “The policeman cans stop the speeding car.”
Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts
Modals
Modals are a special category of verbs that are used to express ability, possibility, permission, certainty, necessity, obligation, preference, and prediction. The meaning of the modal changes the logical meaning of the main verb, so the reader must make an inference or a prediction:
•• “The police officer stopped the speeding cars” is just a statement of fact.
If you say, “The police officer might stop the speeding cars,” you are suggesting that it is possible she will stop the cars, but there is also a chance she won’t.
•• If you say, “The police officer should stop the speeding cars,” you are making a recommendation, but just because you believe the police officer should stop the speeding cars, it doesn’t mean that she actually will.
•• If you say, “The police officer must stop the speeding cars,” you are communicating that you think it is urgent that she stop the speeding cars.
Using modals appropriately is an important way to communicate these and other shades of meaning to readers.
Modals in expository writing
Modals indicate shades of meaning. If everyone agrees something is true, it can be stated as an assertion of fact, using an active verb. Writers often make claims using active verbs and then must support those claims with evidence.
If a writer is unsure about the extent to which something is true, a modal can indicate that it is possible, or likely, or probable. It is an easier task to support a claim that uses a modal than a claim that makes an assertion of fact.
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5. But the police should not harass individuals who have not done anything wrong. RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Indicate possibility: Use modals such as may, might, can, could, are likely to
•• According to the police, these stops of innocent people help fight crime.
(To support this assertion, the police would need to provide evidence that the stops had prevented actual crimes from being committed.)
•• According to the police, the stops of innocent people may help fight crime. (To support this assertion, the police only need to provide evidence that there was a possibility that the stops helped prevent crimes.)
Make a recommendation: Use modals such as should, must, need to, ought to, have to
Writers often express their beliefs and opinions by using modals. Since writers of expository essays are writing to persuade their audience, they frequently use modals to make recommendations about what should happen or what they want their audience to do.
•• The New York City Police Department should be restrained.
•• The New York City Police Department needs to be restrained.
•• The mayor of New York City should restrain the police department.
Optional: Modals and Their Meanings
The following section within Rhetorical Grammar Concepts is useful for
English learners. Depending on their language background and their stage of language development, English learners may be unsure of the precise meaning of various modals and phrasal modals.
Modals and Their Meanings
Modal
can
ability or permission
could
possibility or permission
may
possibility or permission
might
possibility or permission
must
degree of certainty or necessity
shall
necessity
should
obligation
will
prediction
would
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Possible Meanings
possibility or preference
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•• Always come first in the verb phrase
•• Always occur with a subject
•• Are always followed by the simple form of the verb (or by the auxiliaries have and be)
Note: Never put an -s or an -ed on a modal.
Never follow a modal by an infinitive (“to” plus simple verb).
Examples
Racial profiling can happen anywhere right now. (Not “cans happen.” Not
“can to happen.”)
It could happen to someone you know in the future.
It might be difficult to prevent.
Present/future time modals
•• Are followed by the simple form of the verb or an auxiliary
•• May refer either to the present or the future
The police should avoid using racial profiling.
The police may avoid using racial profiling in the future.
Racial profiling must be stopped.
Racial profiling will end when we all realize how unjust it is.
Note: English does not have a real future tense. We use the modal will to predict what will happen in the future.
Past time modals (modal perfects)
•• Are followed by have and the past participle
•• May refer to either the past or the past of a future point of time
The police may have avoided using racial profiling in the past.
(It is possible that the police did not use racial profiling.)
Racial profiling should have ended by the time our children are adults.
(By the time in the future when our children are adults, racial profiling will probably no longer exist, but it has not ended yet.)
Exception
•• Could plus the simple form of the verb is used to refer to a past time
(ability)
From 1992 to 1995, law-enforcement officials could arrest people based on their ethnicity.
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Modals
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Phrasal Modals
Some verbs have the same meaning as modals, but they are formed like regular verbs. They have an -s in the third person singular, present tense, and are followed by an infinitive.
Phrasal Modals and Equivalent Modals
Phrasal Modals
Modals
be able to
We are able to stop racial profiling.
can
We can stop racial profiling.
be going to
We are going to stop racial profiling.
will
We will stop racial profiling.
are about to
We are about to stop racial profiling.
will
We will stop racial profiling.
have to
We have to stop racial profiling. must
We must stop racial profiling.
have got to
We have got to stop racial profiling.
must
We must stop racial profiling.
be supposed to
We are supposed to stop should racial profiling.
We should stop racial profiling.
ought to
We ought to stop racial profiling. should
We should stop racial profiling.
be allowed to
We are allowed to stop racial profiling.
may
We may stop racial profiling.
be likely to
We are likely to stop racial profiling.
could
We could stop racial profiling.
to be about to
We are about to stop racial profiling.
would
We would stop racial profiling.
Note: Both phrasal modals and modals are followed by the simple form of the verb.
Activity 4: Identifying Modals and their Meanings
Have students practice identifying modals and their meanings.
Activity 4: Identifying Modals and their Meanings
This activity is based on a student essay for the Racial Profiling module.
Read the following paragraphs from a student essay about racial profiling.
Double-underline the complete verb phrases in the passage; circle the modals.
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members of minority groups. Statistics show that a police officer is more likely* to pull over a black man for speeding than a white man. When someone is judged by skin color or accent, it can be shameful and humiliating. It’s not fair; it’s not equal; it’s not just. Police officers should protect and serve everyone, not just white people.
If people are judged daily by skin color and nationality, unity will cease to exist.
How can people unite if they cannot look past the surface? Racial profiling may be the greatest cause of division among Americans. “United we stand, but divided we fall.” If America cannot look past its differences, this problem could become worse. If that happens, America, the land of the great, will fall.
Rhetorical purpose: Why does the writer use modals for some verbs but not for others?
The writer uses modals to make recommendations or suggest a possibility. A verb like
“show” in line 2 is used to indicate that something is a fact. It’s harder to argue with him when he uses a modal because it isn’t as definite.
*Note: “is more likely” is a phrasal modal; however, students do not need to identify it for the purpose of this activity.
Now that students have practiced identifying modals and their meaning in
Activity 4, they are ready to use modals in Activity 5.
Activity 5: Using Modals
Complete the following sentences using modals. The sentences should make sense in the context of racial profiling.
1. The New York City police department ____________________________
2. Most Americans _____________________________________________
3. Interrupting the lives of innocent people __________________________
4. The color of someone’s skin ____________________________________
5. Fighting crime ______________________________________________
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Because of their position of authority, police may use their authority to shame
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Editing Student Writing
In activities 6-8 students will apply what they have learned in order to edit student writing. The activities should be taught in conjunction with the Revising and Editing activities in the module. Some of these activities could substitute for editing activities.
Activity 6: Editing Student Writing
The revision activity below is divided into two parts. Students first focus on editing for active verbs rather than passive to make their writing more precise. They then revise using modals to qualify their assertions. Both grammatical features are essential tools for writers constructing arguments that will be clear and persuasive. Student versions will vary. You may wish to project several and ask the writers to explain their grammatical choices from a rhetorical perspective.
Activity 6: Editing Student Writing
This activity is based on a student essay for the Racial Profiling module.
Step 1: Revise the paragraph to make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form and to use modals to qualify assertions where appropriate.
If you need to rewrite an entire sentence, mark the sentence with an asterisk and write your new version at the end of the paragraph.
Likely suspects have been determined by officers using racial profiling, but law enforcement has been led in the wrong direction by accepting stereotypes. After the Oklahoma City bombing, the crime was suspected to have been committed by Middle Eastern terrorists. Instead, the bomber turned out to be a white male and U.S. Army veteran who had earned a Bronze Star. He seemed like the least likely person to commit such a crime. Similarly, well-to-do John Walker
Lindh was an unlikely candidate for a Taliban fighter, although he had left
Marin County and traveled to Afghanistan to join the jihad. Attention from the real perpetrators of crimes is diverted by focusing on race and ethnicity, and profiling stands in the way of effective law enforcement. However, the use of profiling has actually grown since September 11th. According to Amnesty
International, the human rights organization, not only are human rights violated by the practice of profiling by race, religion, and national origin, but it is also counterproductive.
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Officers using racial profiling have determined likely suspects, but accepting stereotypes has led law enforcement in the wrong direction. After the Oklahoma
City bombing, Middle Eastern terrorists were suspected of committing the crime.
Instead, the bomber turned out to be a white male and U.S. Army veteran who had earned a Bronze Start. He seemed like the least likely person to commit such a crime. Similarly, well-to-do John Walker Lindh was an unlikely candidate for a
Taliban fighter, although he had left Marin County and traveled to Afghanistan to join the jihad. Focusing on race and ethnicity diverts attention from the real perpetrators of crimes, and profiling stands in the way of effective law enforcement.
However, the use of profiling has actually grown since September 11th. According to
Amnesty International, the human rights organization, not only does the practice of profiling by race, religion, and national origin violate human rights, but it is also counterproductive. Step 2: Now read your new version, and revise using modals to qualify assertions where appropriate.
Possible response
Officers using racial profiling have determined likely suspects, but accepting stereotypes has may have led law enforcement in the wrong direction. After the
Oklahoma City bombing, Middle Eastern terrorists were suspected of committing the crime. Instead, the bomber turned out to be a white male and U.S. Army veteran who had earned a Bronze Start. He seemed like the least likely person to commit such a crime. Similarly, well-to-do John Walker Lindh was an unlikely candidate for a Taliban fighter, although he had left Marin County and traveled to Afghanistan to join the jihad. Focusing on race and ethnicity diverts can divert attention from the real perpetrators of crimes, and profiling stands (or can stand) in the way of effective law enforcement. However, the use of profiling has actually grown since September 11th. According to Amnesty International, the human rights organization, not only does the practice of profiling by race, religion, and national origin violate human rights, but it is also may also be counterproductive.
Activity 7: Editing Your Guided Composition
In this activity, students will edit their guided composition from Activity 1.
1. Project the original guided composition paragraph and ask your students to read along as you read it out loud.
2. Then project a student paragraph and discuss with the class the differences between the original and the student paragraph (both paragraphs need to be projected simultaneously).
3. Return the student paragraphs and ask your students to edit based on what they’ve learned by doing the activities in the chapter. Don’t give the students access to the original while they are doing this. Direct them to revise assertions in the paragraphs to make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form and to use modals to qualify assertions where appropriate.
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RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
Possible response
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: TEACHER VERSION
4. Ask your students to compare their edited versions with the original.
5. “Debrief ” by asking your students what they learned through the comparison and what they can apply to their own writing.
Activity 7: Editing Your Guided Composition
Return to your guided composition from Activity 1.
• Revise the paragraph to make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form and to use modals to qualify assertions where appropriate.
Remember you may choose to leave some assertions in the active tense and some passive verbs, as long as they serve a clear purpose.
• Put a question mark in the margin next to any sentences that you are unsure about. • Exchange your paragraph with a partner, and discuss any questions you have.
Check with your teacher if you cannot agree on an answer.
Activity 8: Editing Your Own Writing
Now ask students to apply what they have learned to editing their own writing assignment. For students who are still developing editing skills, it’s often best to ask them to edit as a separate step. Once students have revised, and they and you are satisfied with their drafts, they can then edit for whatever rhetorical grammar features you have been teaching. Their ability to apply what you have taught will become part of your assessment of their final draft. Then you can revisit concepts and continue to hold students accountable in subsequent modules for these features as well as the new ones that you will teach.
Activity 8: Editing Your Own Writing
Select a paragraph from your writing assignment for Racial Profiling.
• Revise the paragraph to make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form and to use modals to qualify assertions where appropriate.
Remember you may choose to leave some assertions in the active tense and some passive verbs, as long as they serve a clear purpose.
• Put a question mark in the margin next to any sentences that you are unsure about. • Exchange your paragraph with a partner, and discuss any questions you have.
Check with your teacher if you cannot agree on an answer.
• Now edit the rest of your essay by revising assertions that are too general and making passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form.
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| RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: MODULE 3
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Rhetorical Grammar for
Expository Reading and Writing
Developed by Roberta Ching
STUDENT VERSION
MODULE 3: RACIAL PROFILING
Passives and Modals
Activity 1
Guided Composition
This activity is based on Bob Herbert, “Jim Crow Policing”
The purpose of this activity is for you to write a paragraph on the topic of this module. Your teacher will read a paragraph while you listen, and then read it again while you take notes. You will then write your own paragraph based on what you heard using your notes. Noticing Language
Who is responsible for the actions in the following sentences?
1. Ethnic profiling is practiced throughout the country.
2. Not everyone who is stopped is frisked.
3. Deon Dennis was stopped and searched outside his apartment building in Harlem.
4. People are threatened with arrest for disorderly conduct if they object. Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts
The materials labeled
Rhetorical Grammar
Concepts are for your reference as you do the activities in this unit.
Forming the Passive
A passive verb always includes a form of be plus the participle of the verb. (A participle is the -ed or -en form of the verb.)
Examples: is practiced, was arrested, have been taken
In general, only verbs that have a direct object (transitive verbs) can occur in the passive. A direct object is a noun or pronoun that names the receiver or the object of the verb’s action.
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direct object
Active: The police stopped blacks and Hispanics based on their race. The “doer” of the action in an active sentence is the subject. In a passive sentence, the “doer” is called the agent and is expressed in a prepositional phrase with by. Often the agent is omitted.
“doer” = subject
Active: The officer stopped the young man for suspicious attire.
“doer” = agent
Passive: The motorist was stopped (by the officer) for suspicious attire. Activity 2
Identifying Passive Verbs
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: STUDENT VERSION
Underline the subjects and double-underline the passive verbs or verb phrases in the guided composition. Put (parentheses) around the “by” phrases that indicate the agent.
1. According to Bob Herbert, New York police officers need to be restrained from using ethnic profiling.
2. During the first three-quarters of 2009, 450,000 people in New
York were stopped by the cops.
3. Blacks and Hispanics were stopped much more often than whites.
4. Contraband, usually drugs, was found in just 1.6% of the stops of blacks and 1.4% of Hispanics.
5. Weapons were found in even fewer stops.
6. People are stopped for making furtive movements or wearing
“inappropriate attire for the season.”
7. People going about their daily business are menaced out of the blue by the police.
8. Lalit Carson was stopped on his lunch break from his job as a teaching assistant.
9. A class-action lawsuit has been filed against the city by The
Center for Constitutional Rights. It is time to put an end to Jim
Crow policing in New York City.
Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts
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Changing Active Verbs to Passive Verbs
In most cases, writers use active verbs to make clear who or what is performing the action of the sentence. Sometimes writers use passive verbs to avoid assigning responsibility, as in the phrase,
“Mistakes were made but not by me.” In this sentence, we don’t know who made the mistakes.
| RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: MODULE 3
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Generally, writing that uses active verbs will be stronger and clearer.
However, sometimes writers use the passive intentionally. Below are three reasons for using passive verbs.
1. Use the passive when the agent or “doer” of the action is not known, not important, is obvious, or it is not necessary to name the agent.
Example: John was arrested for loitering.
(The agent is obvious—when someone is arrested it is generally by the police— so the writer doesn’t choose to express the agent.)
Example: Many African Americans and Hispanics have been stopped simply because of their race.
(The writer has put African Americans and Hispanics in the foreground by making them the subject of the sentence. The agent is not specified, although we can infer it is the police.)
3. Use the passive to avoid the informality of using the impersonal you or they.
Examples
Active: You should not stop innocent people based on their race. Passive: Innocent people should not be stopped based on their race.
Activity 3
Changing Active Verbs to Passive Verbs
Rewrite the following sentences from active to passive and indicate how the focus of the sentence changes. If you include the agent in your rewrite, put the “by” phrase (in parentheses). Talk with a partner about why a writer might choose one focus instead of the other for each sentence. Always check your writing to make sure you have a good reason for using the passive.
1. In New York in 2009, law-enforcement personnel stopped black and Hispanic men simply because of their race.
In New York, black and Hispanic men were stopped simply because of their race.
Active sentence focus: law-enforcement personnel
Passive sentence focus: black and Hispanic men
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: MODULE 3 | 77
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: STUDENT VERSION
2. Use the passive when the receiver of the action is the subject rather than the agent of the action. As a result, the focus of the sentence will be on the receiver of the action, not the agent.
2. In New York, the cops stopped 13 percent more people in the first nine months of 2009 than in 2008.
Active sentence focus:
Passive sentence focus:
3. The police found weapons on just 1.4 percent of Hispanics.
Active sentence focus:
Passive sentence focus:
4. The police stopped people of different races in the same proportion that they committed crimes.
Active sentence focus:
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: STUDENT VERSION
Passive sentence focus:
5. But the police should not harass individuals who have not done anything wrong.
Active sentence focus:
Passive sentence focus:
Rhetorical
Grammar Concepts
Modals
One special kind of verb is called a modal. Modals are different from helping verbs such as have, do, and be. Unlike those verbs, modals don’t have endings like regular verbs. We say, “The policeman has stopped the car,” but we don’t say, “The policeman cans stop the speeding car.”
Modals are a special category of verbs that are used to express ability, possibility, permission, certainty, necessity, obligation, preference, and prediction. The meaning of the modal changes the logical meaning of the main verb, so the reader must make an inference or a prediction:
•
•
If you say, “The police officer should stop the speeding cars,” you are making a recommendation, but just because you believe the police officer should stop the speeding cars, it doesn’t mean that she actually will.
•
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“The police officer stopped the speeding cars” is just a statement of fact. If you say, “The police officer might stop the speeding cars,” you are suggesting that it is possible she will stop the cars, but there is also a chance she won’t.
If you say, “The police officer must stop the speeding cars,” you are communicating that you think it is urgent that she stop the speeding cars.
| RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: MODULE 3
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Using modals appropriately is an important way to communicate these and other shades of meaning to readers.
Modals in Expository Writing
Modals indicate shades of meaning. If everyone agrees something is true, it can be stated as an assertion of fact, using an active verb.
Writers often make claims using active verbs and then must support those claims with evidence. If a writer is unsure about the extent to which something is true, a modal can indicate that it is possible, or likely, or probable. It is an easier task to support a claim that uses a modal than a claim that makes an assertion of fact.
•
According to the police, these stops of innocent people help fight crime. (To support this assertion, the police would need to provide evidence that the stops had prevented actual crimes from being committed.) •
According to the police, the stops of innocent people may help fight crime.
(To support this assertion, the police only need to provide evidence that there was a possibility that the stops helped prevent crimes.)
Make a recommendation: Use modals such as should, must, need to, ought to, have to
Writers often express their beliefs and opinions by using modals.
Since writers of expository essays are writing to persuade their audience, they frequently use modals to make recommendations about what should happen or what they want their audience to do.
•
•
The New York City Police Department needs to be restrained.
•
Activity 4
The New York City Police Department should be restrained.
The mayor of New York City should restrain the police department. Identifying Modals and their Meanings
This activity is based on a student essay for the Racial Profiling module. Read the following paragraphs from a student essay about racial profiling.
Double-underline the complete verb phrases in the passage; circle the modals.
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: MODULE 3 | 79
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: STUDENT VERSION
Indicate possibility: Use modals such as may, might, can, could, are likely to
Because of their position of authority, police may use their authority to shame members of minority groups. Statistics show that a police officer is more likely to pull over a black man for speeding than a white man. When someone is judged by skin color or accent, it can be shameful and humiliating. It’s not fair; it’s not equal; it’s not just.
Police officers should protect and serve everyone, not just white people. If people are judged daily by skin color and nationality, unity will
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: STUDENT VERSION
cease to exist. How can people unite if they cannot look past the surface? Racial profiling may be the greatest cause of division among Americans. “United we stand, but divided we fall.” If America cannot look past its differences, this problem could become worse. If that happens, America, the land of the great, will fall.
Rhetorical purpose: Why does the writer use modals for some verbs but not for others?
Activity 5
Using Modals
Complete the following sentences using modals. The sentences should make sense in the context of racial profiling.
1. The New York City police department ___________________________
2. Most Americans ______________________________________________
3. Interrupting the lives of innocent people ________________________
4. The color of someone’s skin ___________________________________
5. Fighting crime ________________________________________________
Activity 6
Editing Student Writing
This activity is based on a student essay for the Racial Profiling module.
Step 1: Revise the paragraph below to make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form.
If you need to rewrite an entire sentence, mark the sentence with an asterisk and write your new version at the end of the paragraph.
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| RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: MODULE 3
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
Likely suspects have been determined by officers using racial profiling, but law enforcement has been led in the wrong direction by accepting stereotypes. After the Oklahoma City bombing, the crime was suspected to have been committed by Middle Eastern terrorists. Instead, the bomber turned out to be a white male and
U.S. Army veteran who had earned a Bronze Star. He seemed like the least likely person to commit such a crime. Similarly, well-to-do
John Walker Lindh was an unlikely candidate for a Taliban fighter, although he had left Marin County and traveled to Afghanistan
diverted by focusing on race and ethnicity, and profiling stands in the way of effective law enforcement. However, the use of profiling has actually grown since September 11th. According to Amnesty
International, the human rights organization, not only are human rights violated by the practice of profiling by race, religion, and national origin, but it is also counterproductive.
Step 2: Now read your new version, and revise using modals to qualify assertions where appropriate.
Activity 7
Editing Your Guided Composition
Return to your guided composition from Activity 1.
•
Revise assertions in your guided composition using modals to make them more defensible and make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form. Remember you may choose to leave some assertions in the active tense and some passive verbs, as long as they serve a clear purpose.
•
Put a question mark in the margin next to any sentences that you are unsure about.
•
Exchange your paragraph with a partner, and discuss any questions you have. Check with your teacher if you cannot agree on an answer.
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: MODULE 3 | 81
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: STUDENT VERSION
to join the jihad. Attention from the real perpetrators of crimes is
Activity 8
Editing Your Own Writing
Select a paragraph from your writing assignment for Racial Profiling.
Put a question mark in the margin next to any sentences that you are unsure about.
•
Exchange your paragraph with a partner and discuss any questions you have. Check with your teacher if you cannot agree on an answer.
•
82
Revise assertions in the paragraph using modals to make them more defensible and make passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form. Remember you may choose to leave some assertions in the active tense and some passive verbs, as long as they serve a clear purpose.
•
RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: STUDENT VERSION
•
Now edit the rest of your essay by revising assertions that are too general and making passive verbs more precise by changing them to active form.
| RHETORICAL GRAMMAR: MODULE 3
CSU EXPOSITORY READING AND WRITING COURSE | SEMESTER ONE
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