A Short Comparison on the Topic of Being Inner-Directed or Outer-Directed.
In today’s society we find that the inner-directed person listens to their own heart. The outer-directed person follows advice and instructions from outside sources. They conform. They relinquish their control over their own life to another source. Most of us are a combination of the two extremes.
The outer-directed person is afraid to be different. He or She is afraid to stand out or to make waves and will fear to take a stand on important issues. It's safer to wear a uniform, to belong, and to think uniform thoughts and to squash any signs of being different or unique. He follows the crowd and fears being alone. His desire is to be a team player and to therefore belong to a group. There's a certain amount of safety in numbers. Tradition is also important. What was good enough for my ancestors is good enough for me. It gives one a feeling of comfort and the continuity of life.
When we are outer-directed people we give everything outside ourselves the power to control our happiness. We essentially become victims of our circumstances. We see this everywhere. Many people fall into this trap, always looking over their shoulders comparing themselves to others, looking to others, acting out in ways to be the center of attention. If you believe that other people make you unhappy, you are under constant pressure to have other people behave in certain ways. You are constantly at the mercy of factors outside yourself–over which you have little or no actual control. Inner-direct people know that they are responsible for the way they respond and feel–therefore the pressure that outer-directed people feel is nonexistent for them.
The reason that outer-directed people don’t see an inner truth is because their attention is on things external to themselves–what other people think and do, what’s wrong with the world and so forth.
When your happiness rides on people behaving a certain way or being a certain way (kids, spouse, friends) you severely limit your perception of them
The outer-directed person is afraid to be different. He or She is afraid to stand out or to make waves and will fear to take a stand on important issues. It's safer to wear a uniform, to belong, and to think uniform thoughts and to squash any signs of being different or unique. He follows the crowd and fears being alone. His desire is to be a team player and to therefore belong to a group. There's a certain amount of safety in numbers. Tradition is also important. What was good enough for my ancestors is good enough for me. It gives one a feeling of comfort and the continuity of life.
When we are outer-directed people we give everything outside ourselves the power to control our happiness. We essentially become victims of our circumstances. We see this everywhere. Many people fall into this trap, always looking over their shoulders comparing themselves to others, looking to others, acting out in ways to be the center of attention. If you believe that other people make you unhappy, you are under constant pressure to have other people behave in certain ways. You are constantly at the mercy of factors outside yourself–over which you have little or no actual control. Inner-direct people know that they are responsible for the way they respond and feel–therefore the pressure that outer-directed people feel is nonexistent for them.
The reason that outer-directed people don’t see an inner truth is because their attention is on things external to themselves–what other people think and do, what’s wrong with the world and so forth.
When your happiness rides on people behaving a certain way or being a certain way (kids, spouse, friends) you severely limit your perception of them