My Grandmother's House

In this poem, “My Grandmother’s House” Kamala Das, recalls her ancestral home and her dead grandmother. This poem takes the form of a confession comparing her present broken state with that of being unconditionally loved by her grandmother. Her memory of love she received from her grandmother is associated with the image of her ancestral home, where she had passed some of the happiest days of her life, and where her old grandmother had showered her love and affection. The speaker received love there. When the she speaks of 'love' in particular she ascertains that it is unconditional and selfless. With the death of the Grandmother, the house ceased being inhabited. It now became an isolated and remote entity, echoed by the phrase 'far away'. When her grandmother died, even the house seemed to share her grief, which is poignantly expressed in the phrase “the House withdrew”. With the death of the Grandmother, her life that was till now filled only with emotions becomes numb. Her veins thus become cold rather than warm. It is as cold of the moon, the moon being an emblem of love. The she now longs to 'peer' at a house that was once her own. She has to peek through the 'blind eyes' of the windows as the windows are permanently closed. The air is frozen now, as contrasted to when the grandmother was alive-the surroundings were filled with the warmth of empathy. In wild despair, she longs to bring in an "armful of darkness". Note firstly, that it is not a 'handful' but an armful. Secondly, 'darkness' that generally has negative shades to it, has positive connotations here of a protective shadow. It also reflects the 'coziness' inside the house. This armful of darkness is her essence of nostalgia. With this piece of darkness, she can lie down for hours, like a brooding dog behind the door, lost in contemplation. The poet is unable to proceed with her thoughts for some time as is indicated by the ellipses (dots).