wishes with revising your paper! Hi‚ Gregory! I am Kobe F.‚ and I am happy to read and comment on your work today. I like your choice of Jimmy Cross for your discussion because he suffers the most important conflict between desire and duty in O’Brien’s story. Below I suggest some improvements to your thesis statement‚ conclusion‚ and comma use to help you enhance your paper. The ERF and embedded comments include the draft being on topic and grammatically correct as in “Help Requested.” So here we go!
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When He Came Back Sasha Boswell He had spent my whole life avoiding me‚ leaving my mother and I to look after ourselves‚ no help‚ no calls‚ no child support‚ not even one single letter just to say hi. The day he called was when my world had changed. I would finally meet him‚ the man from the small photo propped up against the brick wall above the fireplace. My curtains were wide open and the sunlight filtered in‚ creating little dust beams as mum liked to call them. The big oak tree by my window
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Warbled out these metres meet: "Love seeketh only Self to please‚ To bind another to its delight‚ Joys in another’s loss of ease‚ And builds a hell in heaven’s despite." Corrupted By The Sun I saw her. In a miniscule moment. Her long brown hair so luscious and lively‚ cascading like a waterfall past her shoulders down to her torso. Curls bouncing as she turned. Her eyes were as green as a tropical forest. When caught in your direction‚ they not only saw your body but also your soul. So bewitching
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Fantasy Story: Once upon a time there was a girl named Belle. She lived in a magical kingdom‚ but was unaware of it‚ until her 13th birthday. She and her friend Sunny are to discover that there were more than flowers in a garden. “Let’s hurry!” yelled Belle “We don’t have much time!” “Ok‚ ok‚ I’m coming!” murmured Sunny groggily. It was 3 in the morning after all! The two girls were heading to the Tulip Meadow. It all had started when they were having a sleepover
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STORY OF MAYKAPAL In the beginning‚ the sky was very low; it was possible to touch it with a long bamboo pole. Because of this proximity‚ everything on earth was burnt by the intense heat of the sun. The rivers and the seas were boiling tremendously. Then suddenly from nowhere‚ a huge man appeared on earth. This enormous being was called Maykapal. Some of the ancient Tagalogs‚ said that Maykapal was the Lord of the universe who came down to earth to correct some mistakes in his work. However
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Friday‚ December 24‚ 8:40 a.m. Christmas Eve - today’s going to be insane. When I got up this morning‚ it was snowing heavily. The sight made me tingle with excitement. Pumping with adrenaline‚ I fixed myself a cup of water and took a quick wash. I lay down on my snug bed pondering over what to put down for my Christmas list... Life was hard here in Serbia ever since my mum died. Nothing was the same. No more clean water‚ no electronic luxuries and a huge shortage of money. I had to often help
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“FIRST LOVE ” Every Christmas‚ together with Nancy’s Family they travel for a Family reunion. Then one Christmas they went to her Uncle’s resort in Negara‚ Nancy is never excited‚ and this time is no different. They travel for almost 8 hours from their place to her Uncle’s Resort. It is 12nn when they arrived and everybody is so excited to meet their relatives except for Nancy who are on the other side. Nancy was walking in the seashore when she sees lots of familiar faces. It is her cousin
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A Lost Hope The lights appeared out of the darkness. I heard a soft voice talking to me as my eyes slowly opened and everything was blurred. My eyes adjusted I found I wasn’t at home in my own comfy bed but a horrible hospital trolley. My mom was sitting on a chair beside me her hand in mine and her eyes filled with tears I could tell she had been crying. It had happened again I thought to myself‚ I had collapsed for no reason. My mom explained to me why this was happening and a sharp pain shot
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• Walter talks about the missed business opportunity with Charlie Atkins. P.32 • Complains that he has nothing to pass on to Travis. “I have been married eleven years and I got a boy who sleeps in the livingroom -- and all I got to give him is stories about how rich white people live…” p. 34 • To Mama: “Do you know what this money means to me? Do you know what this money can do for us? Mama—Mama—I want so many things.” P. 73 • Mama: “Son‚ how come you talk so much ‘bout money?” Walter: “Because
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In Aldous Huxley’s Brave new World‚ John the savage is undeniably the most complex character misfortunate enough to be influenced by the dystopian society illustrated in the future. The characteristics that Huxley uses to define John not only add to that complexity‚ but also reveal the inevitable demise of one who has been denatured by the dystopian society- despite moral beliefs‚ knowledge of literature to understand the world‚ and the desperation for self-exploration. In the dystopia of Western
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