Addison's Six-Year-Child Observation
I observed my six-year-old daughter, Addison to implement the seven-step problem-solving guidance plan. She is a well-behaved child and I usually do not have any behavior issues with her. However, whenever her father is gone, she likes to test her limits with me and I have to remember she is only a child. The time of day she seems to have the most difficulty following directions is in the morning. I try my best to spend as much quality time with her as possible, but it is hard when you are the only one caring for your children. I thought to myself do expect too much out of her in the morning? Before I decided to use this observation as our behavior issues I talked with two other parents with children the same age. I asked them, “Am I expecting too much out of my six-year-old to get out of bed; and get dressed in a timely manner without having to ask her more than twice”? I mean this she shouldn’t be a fight every morning. What am I doing wrong? When her father was home she woke up on her own, happy and ready for the day. Then I thought maybe it is just a phase and after a few weeks, she will snap out of it. I was wrong, she would go back in forth with having good mornings and bad mornings. Don’t get me wrong, we all have bad mornings, but she was having too many and
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it was time to sit down and develop a plan together and get to the root of the issue. Day one, at 6:15 am my alarm goes off, I press snooze once and then get up about five minutes later. I get myself ready and then I go down to wake Addison up to get dressed and eat breakfast at 7 am. She pulls the covers over her head and tells me she’s too tired to get up. I walk away and start breakfast. About five minutes later I try to get her out of bed a second time. This time I take her blanket and tell her nicely it is time to get ready for school and your breakfast is ready. I need you to get dressed so you have enough time to eat and we can be in school on time. Finally, after the third time I have to drag her out of bed and she still doesn’t want to wear what she has picked out. Twenty minutes later she comes into the kitchen to eat with a grumpy look on her face. We sit down together to eat, I ask her how I can help her feel better? She lays her head on her doggie stuff animal and says she is tired. I ask her what can we do to fix this? She says to me, I think I need more sleep Mommy can you just wake me up later. I laughed silently to myself because I wish the same thing every morning. I tell her if I wake her up later we would never get to school on time. Next, she explains to me she is having trouble falling asleep because she misses her Daddy.
I can relate to this issue because I have trouble falling asleep myself when he is gone. I ask her how I can help her fall asleep faster or comfort her. She suggests she sleeps in my room a few nights a week to feel closer to her Daddy. I tell her I think we can work something out, but it will only be while Daddy is gone. I tell her she has to sleep in her own bed when Daddy comes back. That night she carried her blanket, doggie, and five other stuffed animals to my room. I am thinking to myself, where am I going to sleep with all these stuffed animals she has? I guess it’s a good thing we have a king size
bed. The next morning day two, I wake up around 6 am and get ready for the day. Addison is still asleep in my bed as I quietly get dressed in the room next to her. At about 7 am I go to wake her up. She tells me she is tired and isn’t ready to get up yet. I sit down next to the bed and rub her back for a few minutes and then go start her breakfast. I ask her to please start getting ready for school and that I will be back in a few minutes. About 10 minutes later I return to my room to check on her and she has gone back to sleep. I go over and wake her up again and give her a hug. I tell her I know you are tired and you miss Daddy, but I need you to get dressed and come eat breakfast. She slowly creeps out of bed and gets dressed. When she gets down stairs to eat breakfast, I say to her I think we need to add to our plan. What do you think? We start the process over again and I ask her what else can we do so she is not so tired in the morning and in a better mood. She replies with, “I think I need to go to bed earlier at night.” I tell her that sounds like a good plan. We adjust our bedtime routine that night going to bed 30 minutes earlier than normal. She was going to bed at 8:45 pm and now she goes to bed at 8:15 pm. The following morning day three, she wakes up happy and well rested. She needs a little reminding to get her shoes on but doesn’t complain that she is tired. We sat down and ate breakfast together and wrote out a schedule of days she could sleep with Mommy so she wouldn’t get confused or try to sleep with me every night. It has been a few weeks now since have made the problem- solving plan and it is going well. Her father has even been home to visit since then and she did wonderful with the transition. I am hoping it stays this way but I know we will always have a bad day every once in a while. I am eager to use this process with her in the future and with her brother once he gets a little older.
it was time to sit down and develop a plan together and get to the root of the issue. Day one, at 6:15 am my alarm goes off, I press snooze once and then get up about five minutes later. I get myself ready and then I go down to wake Addison up to get dressed and eat breakfast at 7 am. She pulls the covers over her head and tells me she’s too tired to get up. I walk away and start breakfast. About five minutes later I try to get her out of bed a second time. This time I take her blanket and tell her nicely it is time to get ready for school and your breakfast is ready. I need you to get dressed so you have enough time to eat and we can be in school on time. Finally, after the third time I have to drag her out of bed and she still doesn’t want to wear what she has picked out. Twenty minutes later she comes into the kitchen to eat with a grumpy look on her face. We sit down together to eat, I ask her how I can help her feel better? She lays her head on her doggie stuff animal and says she is tired. I ask her what can we do to fix this? She says to me, I think I need more sleep Mommy can you just wake me up later. I laughed silently to myself because I wish the same thing every morning. I tell her if I wake her up later we would never get to school on time. Next, she explains to me she is having trouble falling asleep because she misses her Daddy.
I can relate to this issue because I have trouble falling asleep myself when he is gone. I ask her how I can help her fall asleep faster or comfort her. She suggests she sleeps in my room a few nights a week to feel closer to her Daddy. I tell her I think we can work something out, but it will only be while Daddy is gone. I tell her she has to sleep in her own bed when Daddy comes back. That night she carried her blanket, doggie, and five other stuffed animals to my room. I am thinking to myself, where am I going to sleep with all these stuffed animals she has? I guess it’s a good thing we have a king size
bed. The next morning day two, I wake up around 6 am and get ready for the day. Addison is still asleep in my bed as I quietly get dressed in the room next to her. At about 7 am I go to wake her up. She tells me she is tired and isn’t ready to get up yet. I sit down next to the bed and rub her back for a few minutes and then go start her breakfast. I ask her to please start getting ready for school and that I will be back in a few minutes. About 10 minutes later I return to my room to check on her and she has gone back to sleep. I go over and wake her up again and give her a hug. I tell her I know you are tired and you miss Daddy, but I need you to get dressed and come eat breakfast. She slowly creeps out of bed and gets dressed. When she gets down stairs to eat breakfast, I say to her I think we need to add to our plan. What do you think? We start the process over again and I ask her what else can we do so she is not so tired in the morning and in a better mood. She replies with, “I think I need to go to bed earlier at night.” I tell her that sounds like a good plan. We adjust our bedtime routine that night going to bed 30 minutes earlier than normal. She was going to bed at 8:45 pm and now she goes to bed at 8:15 pm. The following morning day three, she wakes up happy and well rested. She needs a little reminding to get her shoes on but doesn’t complain that she is tired. We sat down and ate breakfast together and wrote out a schedule of days she could sleep with Mommy so she wouldn’t get confused or try to sleep with me every night. It has been a few weeks now since have made the problem- solving plan and it is going well. Her father has even been home to visit since then and she did wonderful with the transition. I am hoping it stays this way but I know we will always have a bad day every once in a while. I am eager to use this process with her in the future and with her brother once he gets a little older.