Advantages of Being Fat

The Advantages of Being Fat
Big strength often comes with big size. You can open up jars of pickles and move heavy furniture without having to ask for help.
You hardly ever feel cold, so you’ll save on heating fuel in the winter.
Nobody enjoys a good steak or pizza like you do. Nobody.
Thin people are rarely considered “cuddly”.
When you hug someone, you REALLY HUG them.
You don’t make insensitive comments about the physical appearance of others, because you know what that feels like from first-hand experience.
You really get your money’s worth at all-you-can-eat buffets.
Unlike the Silicone-Barbie-Dools or Bowflex Douchebags, you’ve actually had to develop a personality to attract the opposite sex.
Next time some skinny jerk pokes fun at you at the gym, ask them how much they can bench press. And then go lift double that.
Pretend to be clueless about about the health problems associated with obesity, and watch some Righteous Do-Gooder talk themselves blue in the face trying to “educate” you.
You have enough reserves on you to survive a violent stomach flu that would put most people in the hospital.
No expensive search and rescue teams will ever have to risk their lives bringing you off Mt. Everest.
At least you’re not judged as harshly as smokers are (…yet).
You never suffer from food-martyrdom. (“Oooh, I shouldn’t have eaten the piece of chocolate!”)
Kids never have to worry about getting bruised by pelvic bones when they sit on your lap, like they do with Great-Aunt Edna.
If you’ve hooked up with hot babe or hot guy, there’s a good chance they truly like you for who you are. (Unless you’re like rich or something).
You can eat what you want, when you want. (Which is probably why you’ve gotten to where you are, in the first place).
You can write posts like this and get away with it.
After the Apocalypse, when civilization goes to hell in a handbasket, everyone else will starve to death, and you’ll inherit the Earth.
What are the benefits of being fat?
Published 14 July, 2010 Fat , Self-esteem 46 Comments
Living corpulent has some pretty obvious downsides. Fat children are bullied.Fat adults pay more for seats on airplanes. Health care professionals have weight bias. We’re sized out of fashionable and practical clothing. Mainstream media falls over itself (yes, I do consider mainstream media to be a monolithic entity from time to time) trying to tell us all the varied and interesting ways we will clog up the health system/die early. Advocating fat acceptance opens oneself up to a never-ending parade of stupid. It’s enough to get a chubster down from time to time.
But what rocks about being fat? This body shape that impacts our lives in so many ways can’t be all bad, so what are the advantages?
The coolest academic on the block, Dr Samantha Thomas, asked exactly this on twitter. She’s a fat acceptance ally and works in the field of fat studies, but found herself completely stumped when she considered it herself. So she asked her followers, ‘What are the benefits of being fat?’
I managed to think of a whole bunch: * Fat is really fun to play with. I absent-mindedly grab, squish and jiggle my belly all the time (to the embarrassment of my long-suffering mother). Other people, who have less fat than me, are also intrigued by the soft bits of my body and are very pleased when I let them jiggle an arm or poke me in the belly. * In my opinion and contrary to popular belief, many items of clothing look better with curves stretching them out. * Big hips make Latin dancing easier. Even when I do a smaller hip shake in my samba class, I look like I’m doing more than my skinny peers. * The extra cushioning means that fat people are excellent huggers and spooning partners. * All those studies that show we’re less likely to die from chronic illnesses, infections, invasive procedures etc (as outlined so helpfully in Junkfood Science’s posts on obesity). * We make excellent life drawing subjects. As the Boyfriend – who is quite an impressive artist, though he will refute it when he reads this - says, “Nothing is more boring to draw than a perfect body.” * We can turn on the sex. All the tight clothing and fleshy parts can be very indecent when we want them to be. (Or, as Jackie of Fatuosity so eloquently put it, “Hips. Boobs. *drool*”)