Argumentative Essay: Cody Vs. Squatch

Cody vs. Squatch

“I’m never betting on Kentucky again!” Cody said as he trudged through the mud. He had just lost a wager that Kentucky would win the college basketball national championship, and now his friend Tyus, whom he had bet, was making him camp out in the woods for a whole weekend without modern technology. Cody had never camped before, so he didn’t know what to expect, but so far, the muddy ground had ruined his brand new basketball shoes. After walking for what seemed like miles, Cody finally found a clearing in the brush, and decided to set up camp. First, he tried to set up the tent. It took two hours, and when he finally crawled inside, the tent collapsed right on top of him. He gave up, instead attempting to start a
“That hurts!” He was about to pick up his first burger with his charred hands when he heard a loud howl come from the nearby bushes. “Wait a minute that sounds like…” He never got to finish his sentence as a 7-foot monstrous Sasquatch emerged from the shadows and charged at Cody. Cody jumped up and sprinted for cover. When he turned around, he saw the Squatch eating his burgers. Cody became very angry with how much pain he had put into cooking those burgers, and he charged and the monster. The squatch looked up from his food, narrowed his eyes and the approaching human, and ran at Cody. Both monster and man collided and the fight was on! The flicker of firelight reflected the shadows of the two fighters against the many trees surrounding them. Cody had been in wrestling in middle school, so he knew a few moves. The Squatch seemed surprisingly light as Cody attempted a cross-faced cradle, but the beast growled and pinned Cody on his back. Instead of finishing Cody off, the Squatch threw Cody at the collapsed tent. Cody crashed into the canopy which stored his supplies. Cody suddenly remembered; he had brought along weapons! His weapons bag contained a grade-A hunting knife, a hunting bow, a police-issued weapon belt complete with pepper spray and even fully loaded pistol. Finally, the granddaddy of them all, a .22 caliber shotgun. “Dad keeps some pretty cool stuff up here” Cody thought when he was searching the forbidden attic before he left. It was a good thing he had been able to sneak his father’s weapon collection out the door. He knew immediately what he would use. He grabbed his most prized possession to defend himself; his official Kentucky Wildcats basketball? “If I shoot this at the Squatch like the Kentucky players, I’ll hit it right on the head.” So, Cody shot the ball exactly how he remembered the star players shooting it…and the ball went way over the Sasquatch’s head.