Athens And Mauryans Comparison Essay
Sample A
Thesis: Athens and the Mauryans differed in their political centralization and sponsorship of religion and were similar in having to defend themselves against the Persians.
Topic Sentence: Athens and the Mauryans differed in their type of political control it had over people. Athens, as the most powerful city-state, was able to force other city-states into the Delian League often against their will whereas the Mauryan were organized into one single entity. Athens created a system, where the subject states financed public works for only Athens, such as the Parthenon during the Golden Age. This oppressive treatment planted the seeds of the decline. The Mauryan Empire, far less oppressive, was able to copy the Persian bureaucratic …show more content…
Athens was able to force other city-states into the Delian League often against their will but the Mauryan were organized into one single entity. Athens created a system, where the subject states financed public works for only Athens, such as the Parthenon during the Golden Age. This angered some other city-states in the region. The Mauryan Empire, far less oppressive, created a system of administration of royally appointed officials such as judges and clerks throughout the empire to enforce the rule of law. The Mauryans were able to successfully regulate rather but the Athenians took things from surrounding city-states to help build up Athens. Athens and the Mauryans were different because of their location.
Score: 3.5 – Adequate
The thesis was worded a little clumsily in the last part, but it was clear and straight to the point. It stated the two different systems the empires had and how their system developed as their boundaries expanded. It was a little vague when going into more detailed descriptions, but the order of logic was sort of easy to understand. The last sentence wasn’t in depth or specific at all, too vague and the reader is unable to understand why the two empires differed.
Sample
Thesis: Athens and the Mauryans differed in their political centralization and sponsorship of religion and were similar in having to defend themselves against the Persians.
Topic Sentence: Athens and the Mauryans differed in their type of political control it had over people. Athens, as the most powerful city-state, was able to force other city-states into the Delian League often against their will whereas the Mauryan were organized into one single entity. Athens created a system, where the subject states financed public works for only Athens, such as the Parthenon during the Golden Age. This oppressive treatment planted the seeds of the decline. The Mauryan Empire, far less oppressive, was able to copy the Persian bureaucratic …show more content…
Athens was able to force other city-states into the Delian League often against their will but the Mauryan were organized into one single entity. Athens created a system, where the subject states financed public works for only Athens, such as the Parthenon during the Golden Age. This angered some other city-states in the region. The Mauryan Empire, far less oppressive, created a system of administration of royally appointed officials such as judges and clerks throughout the empire to enforce the rule of law. The Mauryans were able to successfully regulate rather but the Athenians took things from surrounding city-states to help build up Athens. Athens and the Mauryans were different because of their location.
Score: 3.5 – Adequate
The thesis was worded a little clumsily in the last part, but it was clear and straight to the point. It stated the two different systems the empires had and how their system developed as their boundaries expanded. It was a little vague when going into more detailed descriptions, but the order of logic was sort of easy to understand. The last sentence wasn’t in depth or specific at all, too vague and the reader is unable to understand why the two empires differed.
Sample