I am an international student from Czech Republic and I am applying for college preparatory boarding school in USA. This is my short essay (100-200 words), topic is "Tell us about yourself and why you would like to become a part of our school family."
My story is similar like the story of thousand of other children: My father struggled with alcohol and drug problems which caused him to leave my mother and me, so I grew up with only my mother. Nevertheless, I realized what I want from my life.
Throughout my life, I have heard people constantly repeat that children who grow up with only one parent end up unsuccessful, on drugs or even in prison. I have decided that I do not want that for me; I will not follow my father's footsteps. Over time my interest in my future and the future of other children developed. My interest in helping people and doing important things for the world grew. I began to teach children who have had a worse childhood than I – children without family or parents, children living in foster homes.
I believe that if you do everything in your power you can achieve anything. You can change your life for the better, no matter the circumstances. Your school can help me to change my future and then, I hope, I will be able to change also future of other people.
Instructions were to write a personal essay on yourself. Anything about yourself is fine. So I wrote it but I have no confidence in personal essays, and English is my second language so... Can you please give me an opinion on it and if you could, can you also tell me the grammatical errors and tense errors? Thank you.
To many high school students, 'music', 'sports', 'hobbies' are the things that shape his or her identity. To me, my experience of living in the boarding house is a huge factor which shaped my personality, in another words my identity. I went there after failing to assimilate into another school in New Zealand. Because I was not a native English speaker, it