Zits has a hard time growing up. This makes him confrontational and destroys his pride. One aspect of his difficulty revolves around his insecurity with his body. Zits has a pimply and skinny body. “I’m dying from about ninety-nine kinds of shame.” Another aspect of his difficulty relates to how Zits feels about his parents (4). Zits thinks “My father was a drunk, too, more in love with beer and vodka than with my mother and me.” Zits begins to hate his dad and love his mom from his scattered memories of a hard childhood (4). Zits’ father left him and his mother. Not only does he hate his father for what he did, but he feels ashamed of his father's behavior towards his mother. Zits thinks so highly of his mother that shame turns to near hate.He needs an outlet for his shame, hate and anger.
Zits finds mass murder as his outlet but only acts it out in his mind. After these imaginary murders, Zits changes through five bodies. He sees the atrocities of death while in these bodies which makes him gain respect for human life. Zits thinks, “I remember that in another life I killed people like this” when describing Custer’s hill (72). He learns how cruel the Indians were, as well as the whites. Zits becomes truly happy for the first time in his life in the Indian camp before the battle. He finally feels like he belongs. “Maybe God forgave me and sent me to Heaven”. Zits believes The Indian camp is Heaven because it is the first time he feels connected to his heritage (65).
Zits finally transports into his father’s body. He feels the pain of his father’s life as a drunk. Zits